


Don't talk to us or our fluffy haired son ever again

by alcloe



Category: Persona 3, Persona 4, Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: A lot - Freeform, EVERYONE IN THE SHADOW OPERATIVES LOVES AKIRA, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, M/M, P5 chat fic where akira grows up in inaba and with the members of the SO, RYOJI IS ALIVE BECAUSE LOVE OVERCOMES ALL EVEN NYX, There're a lot of established relationships, Warnings in each chapter if need be, heLLO CHAT FIC, spoilers for after 5th palace
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2019-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-29 03:24:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 90,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13918362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alcloe/pseuds/alcloe
Summary: fists on wheels: While it is lovely, I have to ask. Why did you send a photo of Ryuji to the group chat?super fluffy: I'm challenging my fake parents to a boyfriend offsuper fluffy: Who is the best and cutest boyfriendsuper fluffy: Ryuji, my fake parent's husband, or my other fake parent's fianceChapter 24. With further progression in the palace, the Shadow Ops finds some things out. Also, some kids roast each other and trauma.Edit 6/27/2018: Chat format changed so that repeated messages from one person are grouped up.





	1. ryUJI IS BEST BOI

**Author's Note:**

> I just really wanted to make a chat fic with P3, 4, and 5.
> 
> Changes:  
> \- Medjed is stopped on the 11th of August since Futaba doeSN'T NEED TO SLEEP UNTIL THE 21ST. Prime time for some meet and greet. The gang helps Futaba then goes to the beach from the 12th on.  
> -Apologizes in advance if the timeline no longer makes sense.
> 
> Names:  
> Akira: super fluffy/Tiny Munchkin/Joker  
> Ryuji: CATCH THESE HANDS/Skull  
> Ann: strawberry shortcake/Panther  
> Yusuke: graphic design is my passion/Fox  
> Makoto: fists on wheels/Queen  
> Futaba: yeet/Oracle  
> Souji: Walking Spoon  
> Minato: eternal rest

**August 16, 2016**

  
**\-- > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <\--**

 **super fluffy** : LOOKHEREITSMYBESTBOI.jpeg

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ??????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Whoa Akira what gives? Not that it's a bad picture and all

 **yeet** : ooooh thanks for the blackmail but i already have a picture of this

 **super fluffy** : Wait shit

 **graphic design is my passion** : The composition of this photo is impressive. The manner in which the light bounces off Ryuji's face is compelling in the way it seems as if his face is glowing. Even though the small amount of drool is a tad off putting, the photo encompasses how comfortable he looks in LeBlanc's warm and homey atmosphere as he casually sleeps at one of the tables.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Trust Yusuke to make up an art review in no time

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : BRO WHEN DID YOU TAKE THIS

 **super fluffy** : When you were sleeping duh

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT

 **yeet** : i bet 1000 yen ryuji is blushing right up his ears right now

 **graphic design is my passion** : No one would take you up on that bet because it's true.

 **yeet** : shit u right

 **fists on wheels** : While it is lovely, I have to ask. Why did you send a photo of Ryuji to the group chat?

 **super fluffy** : I'm challenging my fake parents to a boyfriend off  
 **super fluffy** : Who is the best and cutest boyfriend  
 **super fluffy** : Ryuji, my fake parent's husband, or my other fake parent's fiance  
 **super fluffy** : They're still denying the truth

 **strawberry shortcake** : Whoa whoa wait fake parents??????

 **graphic design is my passion** : I never knew one could have fake parents.

 **fists on wheels** : Do you mean adoptive parents? I thought you weren't adopted.

 **super fluffy** : I'm not  
 **super fluffy** : Excuse me for a moment

 **strawberry shortcake** : Akira??????

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : LOOKHEREITSMYBESTBOI.jpeg  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : GET A LOAD OF THIS SUCKERS  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : RYUJI IS BEST BOI  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : LOOK AT HIS FACE  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : HE'S SO CUTE WHEN HE SLEEPS

 **Walking Spoon** : You know your stuff, Akira.  
 **Walking Spoon** : Boyfriend sleeping pictures are prime material for a challenge such as this.  
 **Walking Spoon** : But you're about to eat your words.  
 **Walking Spoon** : Give me a moment as I look through my albums of Yosuke and cats.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : I GOT POINTS NOW.

 **eternal rest** : of course souji has albums for cats  
 **eternal rest** : and yes you do have points now

 **Tiny Munchkin** : WHAT SAY YOU MINATO-SENPAI

 **eternal rest** : cute.jpeg  
 **eternal rest** : this is what i say fool  
 **eternal rest** : feast your eyes on my husband's greatest strength

 **Tiny Munchkin** : FUCK

 **Walking Spoon** : Oh.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : PUPPY DOG EYES ARE CHEATING MINATO-SENPAI  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : ESPECIALLY RYOJI-SENPAI'S

 **eternal rest** : like i said  
 **eternal rest** : greatest strength  
 **eternal rest** : ryoji's puppy eyes are the strongest weapons that had ever existed in humanity

 **Tiny Munchkin** : hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 **Walking Spoon** : What about this then?  
 **Walking Spoon** : yosukefrost.jpeg

 **Tiny Munchkin** : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : Oh my god is that

 **eternal rest** : where did you get that outfit i want it i need to have it and put it on ryoji

 **Walking Spoon** : The location of the Jack Frost onesies will remain my secret only.  
 **Walking Spoon** : ;)  
 **Walking Spoon** : Top that.

 **eternal rest** : shit he did the winking face  
 **eternal rest** : this is getting real  
 **eternal rest** : what about this ass  
 **eternal rest** : ass.jpeg

 **Walking Spoon** : I'm so glad you didn't literally mean Ryoji's ass.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : fusfudhfksdjfh his scarf is wrapped like a bow his smile is pure

 **eternal rest** : he is my pure and sacred boi

 **Walking Spoon** : yosukeinthekitchen.jpeg  
 **Walking Spoon** : How about that?

 **eternal rest** : shit that's domestic

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Is Yosuke-senpai making breakfast?  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : WAIT I RECOGNIZE THAT SHIRT THAT'S YOURS  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : AND ARE THOSE  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : THAT'S NOT PURE AND SACRED

 **Walking Spoon** : ;))))))

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Fucckck I'm losing ground

 **Walking Spoon** : Eat shit Kurusu; Yosuke's been my boyfriend far longer than you've been with yours!

 **eternal rest** : the same goes for me  
 **eternal rest** : whether or not the years he spent inside me count

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Kinky

 **eternal rest** : shut up you fetus

 **Tiny Munchkin** : I'M YOUNG BUT NOT THAT YOUNG

 

**\-- > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <\--**

**graphic design is my passion** : You still haven't changed my username.

 **yeet** : it will never be changed  
 **yeet** : it embodies u as a person inari  
 **yeet** : embrace it  
 **yeet** : or would u rather called art hoe

 **graphic design is my passion** : I'd rather not.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Stay pure, Yusuke

 **graphic design is my passion** : Memes are an art I will never understand, but maybe it's better this way.

 **super fluffy** : ALERT ALERT PHANTOM THIEVES CONVENE  
 **super fluffy** : MEET ME IN THE PHANTOM THIEVES CHAT RIGHT NOW

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : what

 **fists on wheels** : Akira?!

 

**Phantom Thieves**

**Joker** : Alright, is everyone here?  
 **Joker** : Role!

 **Panther** : Present!

 **Skull** : Present!

 **Oracle** : Oracle's ready to rumble!

 **Fox** : I am here.

 **Queen** : I as well.

 **Joker** : Mona's not around, but it's not like he has thumbs for a phone.

 **Queen** : Why have you called a meeting, Joker? There aren’t any other targets to follow through with just yet.

 **Skull** : Yeah. We just took down Medjed a few days ago, the public's gotta be talking about that still.

 **Fox** : I propose it’s best to stay low for now.

 **Joker** : I know, I know, but this one is a more... personal mission.

 **Panther** : Personal?

 **Oracle** : If you’re asking us to change the heart of some rando you know, you know it won’t be easy.

 **Joker** : No no, no Palace or even Mementos. Just...  
 **Joker** : Reconnaissance.

 **Skull** : You want us to do recon?!

 **Panther** : Oooooooh recon!! Like a spy movie!

 **Queen** : Recon? Whatever for?

 **Joker** : My “fake” parents are plotting to defile Skull’s name as best boy so I need to hunt down the store that sells Jack Frost onesies so Skull can prove his best boy-ness.

 **Panther** : ...

 **Fox** : ...

 **Oracle** : ...

 **Skull** : sjdbdudbsjix

 **Queen** : No button mashing here. This is a serious chat.

 

**\-- > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <\--**

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : RISBDUDVAIBFSIGDVD  
 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : AKIRA WHAT THE FUCK

 

**Phantom Thieves**

**Oracle** : I’m down! When do we get started?

 **Skull** : Wait wait, not all of us agreed! We should still agree even though this isn’t a usual mission!

 **Panther** : I’m curious about these Jack Frost onesies. I know Joker has a plush in his room, but I never thought onesies could exist.

 **Fox** : Jack Frost is an oddly famous Persona. Could King Frost and Black Frost merchandise exist as well?

 **Panther** : If we go we'll find out!

 **Queen** : It's not a usual mission, but we deserve to have a break after dealing with Medjed.

 **Joker** : Vote?

 **Oracle** : Yep!

 **Fox** : I shall participate to feed my curiosity on this topic.

 **Panther** : I’m down for it too!

 **Joker** : Queen?

 **Queen** : I will go along with it then.

 **Joker** : Good.

 **Skull** : Hey, what the hell?! This is about me! I ain't down for this shit!

 **Panther** : Aw, come on Skull!!

 **Joker** : I had a feeling this would happen.

 **Queen** : Joker?

 

**\-- > Enter here for Gays and Thieving <\--**

**super fluffy** : prettyplease.gif

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : AKDBFHHSJSBHUGHUJSJBC FFFFFFFFFUCUU

 **strawberry shortcake** : HOLY SHIT AKIRA

 **yeet** : omg did you seriously make a gif of you doing puppy eyes and batting your eyelashes at the camera

 **super fluffy** : Yes I did

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : damnit man u know im w e a k for ur face

 **super fluffy** : I know love

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuckin,,,,,dhdiwhvsj

 **strawberry shortcake** : *gasp* The nickname card!

 **yeet** : its super effective

 **fists on wheels** : It’s time to admit defeat, Ryuji.

 **graphic design is my passion** : The nickname card is a fearsome weapon.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : HHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 **super fluffy** : :3c

 **graphic design is my passion** : Do you mind if I use this as a reference, Akira?

 **super fluffy** : Not at all go for it Yusuke

 **graphic design is my passion** : Thank you.

 **super fluffy** : Come on let’s reconvene

 

**Phantom Thieves**

**Joker** : Skull?

 **Skull** : FINE LET’S DO IT.  
 **Skull** : But only if I get one for you too.

 **Joker** : Of course.

 **Panther** : Ooh, I should get one for Shiho too! Do you know if they come in different colors?

 **Joker** : I don’t know, but they might.

 **Oracle** : Why don’t we all get one? Then all the Phantom Thieves could have matching Jack Frosts onesies!

 **Panther** : That’s not a bad idea, Oracle!

 **Fox** : I wonder if they’ll have one my size.

 **Joker** : Order, Phantom Thieves!  
 **Joker** : Alright. Reconnaissance is our next mission. Use your connections to figure out where this Jack Frost store is, then report back your findings on the main chat. Understood?

 **Oracle** : Roger!

 **Panther** : Yep!

 **Skull** : Got it, Leader!

 **Fox** : Understood.

 **Queen** : Alright.

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : YOU’RE ABOUT TO REGRET SHOWING ME THAT PICTURE SOUJI-SENPAI HAHAHA


	2. b i g  m i s t a k e

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akira screws up and has to deal with the consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chat fic started as something to shove my headcanons into, but now it's developing a true plot. Oops. At this point, the story is writing itself and I'm letting it.

**August 18, 2016 (Afternoon)**

  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

 **fists on wheels** : So.  
 **fists on wheels** : How would you all rate the success of the mission?

 **super fluffy** : TOTAL SUCCESS

 **strawberry shortcake** : 100000000/10!!!!

 **yeet** : WOULD VISIT AGAIN IN A HEARTBEAT

 **super fluffy** : YUSUKE YOU’RE LUCKY THE STUFF FROM THE METAVERSE SELLS FOR A TON BECAUSE GOD

 **graphic design is my passion** : I apologize for the amount of Jack Frost figurines I requested, but they looked so beautiful that I must draw them and immortalize them in my art.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : I NEVER THOUGHT A STORE FOR JACK FROSTS OF ALL KINDS COULD SELL MEASURING CUPS BUT LOOK WHERE WE ARE NOW

 **strawberry shortcake** : Yeah I was expecting plushies but they had kitchenware and bathroom things too

 **yeet** : there is now a new towel hanging on the back of the bathroom door and a jack frost toothbrush by the sink

 **fists on wheels** : Would Boss appreciate a mug with King Frost on it?

 **yeet** : definitely

 **super fluffy** : Alright guys the moment of truth is coming it’s time for all our efforts to come to fruition  
 **super fluffy** : You can’t see it right now but I’m sobbing tears of joy at the dedication you showed for this mission  
 **super fluffy** : “He’s actually sobbing guys help” says Mona

 **graphic design is my passion** : You have surprising steady fingers for someone who is sobbing

 **super fluffy** : I’m used to it  
 **super fluffy** : Anyway you guys are the best

 **fists on wheels** : While your aversion of the topic is obvious, whatever our Leader wishes, we will do our best.

 **graphic design is my passion** : The onesies are quite the unique garb. Everyone ultimately took something from this mission, so I am content.

 **yeet** : this side mission was one of the best ive ever been on and ive been on a lot of side missions  
 **yeet** : yes all those things u forced me to do were side missions

 **strawberry shortcake** : No one underestimates the Leader’s best boy!

 **super fluffy** : “Lady Ann what about me?!” says Mona

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i dont mean to be too sappy but if ur happy im happy

 **super fluffy** : ily

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ilysm

 **yeet** : yallre gross

 **super fluffy** : “If you want to be sappy do it in your DMs” says Mona

 **strawberry shortcake** : Right Morgana’s reading this too

 **super fluffy** : Futaba can I bother you for a side quest  
 **super fluffy** : Exclusively for you ultra rare side quest with a large EXP gain

 **yeet** : :eyes:

 **super fluffy** : Can you somehow make a translation app for Morgana

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : sounds fancy

 **yeet** : a legit cat-to-text app is pretty impossible u know

 **super fluffy** : A Morgana-to-text should be easier since he already speaks Japanese

 **yeet** : im gonna have to use necronomicon make this but its feasible

 **strawberry shortcake** : Morgana deserves a chance to be in the group chat  
 **strawberry shortcake** : Akira’s not always gonna be there

 **super fluffy** : “Thank you for your kind words Lady Ann” says Mona

 **graphic design is my passion** : Must you always add “says Mona” at the end?

 **super fluffy** : It completes the sentence

 **graphic design is my passion** : I suppose.

 **yeet** : ill whip something up but itll take a while  
 **yeet** : luckily we have a ton of free time so expect it within the next few days

 **super fluffy** : sweet  
 **super fluffy** : Okay guys let’s meet up in my room to take pictures  
 **super fluffy** : You just be your cute self love

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : sure thing babe

 **super fluffy** : djjehdbdjm

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : dhfvdudbjd

 **strawberry shortcake** : Weak

 

**August 18, 2016 (Evening)**

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : testsquad1.jpeg  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : WHAT ABOUT THIS??  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : My friends and I spent a lot of time finding that store of yours  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : Worth it

 **Walking Spoon** : Oh.

 **eternal rest** : o

 **Tiny Munchkin** : ??????  
 **Tiny Munchkin** : sHIT WRONG PICTURE

_testsquad1.jpeg has been deleted!_

**eternal rest** : while I was expecting a reveal i didn’t expect this

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : THROW ME OFF A BRIDGE PLS  
 **super fluffy** : KILL ME

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : akira?!!??!

 **yeet** : holy shit what happened

 **super fluffy** : I MADR W HUGE MISTAKE

 **yeet** : i swear i could hear u screaming from here

 **fists on wheels** : Akira, calm down. Breathe. It’s probably not as bad as you say.

 **super fluffy** : Haha

 **yeet** : mock laughter? thats not a good sign

 **super fluffy** : I kind of  
 **super fluffy** : Accidentally told my fake parents about us?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : us like

 **super fluffy** : Phantom thieves us

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuck

 **yeet** : oh fuck

 **graphic design is my passion** : Excuse my language, but you fucked up.

 **super fluffy** : I know I know

 **strawberry shortcake** : How?! What did you do?

 **super fluffy** : I accidentally sent them one of the pictures of our squad in the Metaverse when Futaba managed to get our cameras working in there instead of a picture of Ryuji

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : aki why

 **super fluffy** : WE'RE STILL AT WAR RYU  
 **super fluffy** : THEY REFUSE TO BELIEVE

 **fists on wheels** : This is really out of character for you, Akira. You're usually so on guard about information pertaining to us.

 **super fluffy** : I know but these guys are like my family and I’ve never been particularly tight lipped around them  
 **super fluffy** : And my finger slipped so yeah

 **yeet** : surejan.png

 **super fluffy** : Did you seriously just type that out

 **yeet** : hell yeah i did

 **strawberry shortcake** : You’ve never told us about them before

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah this is the first time ive heard of them

 **super fluffy** : It’s not like I don’t like them but no one really asked

 **fists on wheels** : It’s more our fault than Akira’s for not asking then.  
 **fists on wheels** : Do you consider them trustworthy?

 **super fluffy** : Honestly I trust them with my life

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : thats a big statement dude

 **strawberry shortcake** : I’m surprised mister boyfriend over here didn’t know a thing

 **super fluffy** : I’m sorry Ryu

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : water under the bridge or whatever that saying is its not that big of a deal

 **super fluffy** : It kinda is  
 **super fluffy** : You all have told me about your families and I haven't told you a thing about mine

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : its honestly fine aki!!  
 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i always thought you had a bad rep with your parents so i never pushed  
 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : none of us did

 **super fluffy** : Oh no i love my parents  
 **super fluffy** : Well  
 **super fluffy** : Shit I'm sorry can I tell you guys another time I'll need to prepare myself

 **fists on wheels** : It's fine, Akira.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Take all the time you need!!!

 **super fluffy** : Thanks

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : sooooooooo anyway ur fake parents right? we’ve gotta meet these guys! allies of our leader and stuff

 **yeet** : and ur future in laws

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : rjdbhduwhvud

 **super fluffy** : Futaba stop breaking my boyfriend

 **yeet** : but its such a fun pass time

 **super fluffy** : Shit you’re right

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey!! whose side are u on

 **strawberry shortcake** : I'm going to turn in guys. It’s late

 **graphic design is my passion** : I concur. We should all rest, it being 2 in the morning.

 **yeet** : why are you even up inari

 **graphic design is my passion** : Inspiration can come at the most inconvenient of times.

 **fists on wheels** : Many of you have class. It’s about time to sleep.

 **super fluffy** : sleep is for the weak

 **fists on wheels** : Akira.

 **super fluffy** : Yes Mom

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : team mom strikes again

 **yeet** : the mom voice is too powerful

 **fists on wheels** : While I can’t stop Futaba, we should rest so we can discuss what happened here after school. It’s high time Akira actually told us about who these two fake parents are.

 **super fluffy** : I have 18 fake parents actually

 **yeet** : wait what

 **super fluffy** : Oh shit I should talk to them night y’all

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : WTF AKIRA

 **strawberry shortcake** : AKIRA WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

 **graphic design is my passion** : How fascinating.

 **fists on wheels** : Sometimes I wonder where those punk and delinquent rumors come from when he acts like this.

 

**You Fools**

**eternal rest** : while I was expecting a reveal i didn’t expect this

 **Walking Spoon** : That was sudden.

 **eternal rest** : looks like we finally caught Akira off guard  
 **eternal rest** : everyone owes me 500 yen

 **Walking Spoon** : I can’t believe you actually bet on when he would spill.

 **eternal rest** : don’t text so innocently seta i know you bet too  
 **eternal rest** : i’ll be collecting my prize winnings the next time i come to tokyo

 **Walking Spoon** : Ugh.

 **eternal rest** : it’s about time for ryoji and i to head there anyway  
 **eternal rest** : ken's settled in the dorm with koromaru jr it should be fine without us

 **Walking Spoon** : We're about to be much busier than we were before. It's honestly kind of refreshing.

 **eternal rest** : real life sucks kicking shadow ass is where it's at  
 **eternal rest** : speaking of kicking shadow ass  
 **eternal rest** : the so

 **Walking Spoon** : Right, the others have to know. What day would be appropriate to meet?

 **eternal rest** : the kids don't have school but the others still need to get here so eh  
 **eternal rest** : next week

 **Walking Spoon** : We'll have to discuss a date with the Phantom Thieves on when we can meet them.  
 **Walking Spoon** : Let's fill Akira in when he comes back.

 **eternal rest** : sure

 **Walking Spoon** : What’s preventing us from telling what we're planning in our group chats?

 **eternal rest** : nothing let’s do this shit

 

**Seekers of mY ESCAPED SOUL**

**sooj** : Good evening everyone. Expect a meeting in Tokyo within the next week; we “know” about the Phantom Thieves now.  
 **sooj** : Oops, wrong chat. Oh well.

 **yoosk** : gotcha babe.

 **sooj** : Why are you awake?

 **yoosk** : you kept giggling at your phone it woke me up.

 **sooj** : Oh, I’m sorry.

 **yoosk** : it’s fine don’t worry.

 **Nao-Nao** : You’re both lucky Chie-senpai isn’t awake or she’d be telling you to get your PDA off the chat.

 **sooj** : Make sure you sleep soon, Naoto.

 **Nao-Nao** : Don’t fret senpai, I’ll be fine.

 

**SEES**

**Arisato** : Heads up, Akira finally spilled so Souji and I are telling our respective groups to meet up in Tokyo next week.

 **Kirijo** : Noted. Thank you, Arisato.

 **Arisato** : No problem.

 **Iori** : hey what the fuck it’s 2 in the morning

 **Kirijo** : You can complain in the meme chat, not in the serious one.

 **Iori** : k

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : Hey guys so what the fuck


	3. The Shadow Operatives and Akira

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phantom Thieves have a talk about the Shadow Operatives and things get... sad.
> 
> (Content warning: Car accidents (mentioned), loss of limbs (mentioned))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one... this one got out of my control. Really and truly got out of my control.
> 
> Well, it's not purely chat fic anymore because I couldn't keep this conversation in chat format since it's important for world building and what not.
> 
> This was originally supposed to be longer, but I split it because it got too long. Next chapter's out immediately after this one.

**August 20, 2016 (Morning)**  
  
— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—  
  
**super fluffy** : So apparently I’ve been lied to my whole life but I’m not particularly surprised  
  
**fists on wheels** : About your fake parents?  
  
**super fluffy** : Yeah  
**super fluffy** : Hey Makoto question  
  
**fists on wheels** : What is it?  
  
**super fluffy** : Do you know who the Shadow Operatives are?  
  
**fists on wheels** : Never heard of it.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sounds like some secret organization shit  
  
**super fluffy** : That’s exactly what it is  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : whoa seriously  
  
**super fluffy** : I’ll tell you more, let me just make sure everyone’s here  
**super fluffy** : NEAR  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : FAR  
  
**fists on wheels** : It’s  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : MY  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Chocolate  
  
**yeet** : BAR  
  
**super fluffy** : Good

 **yeet** : we're all filthy memes

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : says the most filthy meme herself

 **yeet** : i will neither confirm nor deny that claim  
**yeet** : tho im still surprised makoto and inari were up to it  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I must engage in these activities to further understand meme culture.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : pppffffffffffffffffffffggggggggggggggggg  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Meme culture????  
  
**super fluffy** : Futaba  
  
**yeet** : >:)c  
**yeet** : youknowihadtodoittoem.png  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : fUTABA  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : sisjdishdvk sashit I Can’t breathe  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : what the fuck is a sashit  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : shut up ryuji  
  
**fists on wheels** : Guys, be serious.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Sorry  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sorry  
  
**super fluffy** : Anyway gang we’ve got some shit to cover  
**super fluffy** : While we would usually go to the PT chat, there is seriously just too much to cover.  
**super fluffy** : Get over here and bring snacks  
**super fluffy** : It’ll take a while to get through  
  
Akira Kurusu keeps a list of fuck ups stashed in the deep recesses of his mind. It’s locked in a mind cage made of Kevlar and diamond with the key thrown to fucking Narnia and a password the first 100 digits of pi. It’s a very organized list, mind you, and not once did he have to add anything ever since _the bad thing_ happened. But you know, fate likes to make an ass of him and he had to scour the ocean that was his conscience for a needle in a haystack the size of the universe and write down his misfortune of “wrongfully accused and booted to an overcrowded city for the expense of a drunk man who couldn’t see past his own feet”.

Now, he would like to add “this meeting” in that list of fuck ups, followed by exclamation points, 1s, and keyboard smashing.  
  
Akira shimmies off of his bed where he had laid for the past 3 hours staring at his phone and guaranteeing future blindness. Morgana hops off before he could fall over into a pile of grade A textured blanket while Akira checks his phone and the three million group chats he’s in because of his senpais. His eyes land on the one for the Fools.  
  
Ha ha, Fool. He gets it now.  
  
Rolling his shoulders, Akira ambles over to his sacred box of treasures and put his phone face down on the floor. Morgana titters behind him before bolting down the stairs, probably for some chow. Humming one of Minato-senpai’s favorite tunes, he opens his box and pulls out an t-shirt with plaid patterns from when his senpai used to drag him into games of dress up. Horrible, horrible times.  
  
_At least they were kind enough to leave out the dresses_ , he muses while picking up a days old pair of shorts. He didn’t need Ryuji or Ann to see the maid dresses or halter tops Rise-senpai would bring him when she came back from America. Futaba had enough blackmail to make his life and afterlife a living hell, thank you very much!  
  
Akira 100% blames his parents for the fact that he looks good in anything. Ren did too—  
  
“Fucking shit don’t think about it,” he growls to himself. Akira viciously pulls his thoughts out of that topic with the strength of one of those swole bodybuilders Americans seem to love and hurls it into the metaphorical sun because there sure as hell isn't a blazing ball of gas burning its way behind his retinas. He throws his clothes onto his body with the grace of a 140 pound gorilla and grabs his phone in a way that Futaba would call Akira brand extra.

 **super fluffy** : Y’all here?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : door  
  
“Akira, your friends are here!” Sojiro calls from downstairs, the ringing bell drowned out. Akira smirks. Trust the Phantom Thieves to make it right on time. He hears chattering, Ryu’s signature booming voice and Ann’s high soprano as they presumably talk to Sojiro. He hopes they’re getting breakfast. Lord knows how lazy he is to go downstairs when he doesn’t need to.

Morgana runs back upstairs like a little black and white bolt and plows next to the teen. “The guys have food and breakfast. I’m pretty sure they all stopped by a crepe stand.” Akira nods. Chances are they got dragged there by Ann rather than went there willingly. Morgana kneads Akira’s thigh with his paws like he’s trying to make dough. “You know you’ve got a lot of explaining to do, mister,” he scowls. Akira can’t take him seriously. The not-cat looked to much like a cat to be a not-cat. Akira doesn’t get to answer him when footsteps start pounding its way up the stairs.

“Morning, Aki!” Ryuji chirps at him, dropping his things by the box before swooping over to him and pecking him on the lips. Wow, is that mush and sappy air actually palpable because he feels as if there are sparkles coming off of Ryuji. Akira grins and pecks him back, unable to contain a really girly giggle. Yeah, there’s definitely actual sparkles in the air. Futaba’s grossed out noises confirmed it.

“Get off each other, we have business,” Ann complains from her spot on the floor.

“Uh huh yeah, as if you wouldn’t do the same thing if Shiho was here,” Akira quips back, dragging a dazed out boyfriend (Ryuji was weak to kisses and Akira’s general presence; make sure to add that to the records, Futaba) over by his bed. He notices Yusuke sketching as if his hand suddenly gained sentience and was spazzing viciously on the paper while Makoto lays out the food they brought up. Yesss. There’s breakfast.

“Come on, Akira. I know you haven’t eaten yet,” Makoto says. And what can he say to that? Denying free food is the highest crime a human being can commit. Akira prowls over and leaves Ryuji to sit there making the best impression of someone who just ate magic mushrooms. Morgana decides to help out in the most Morgana way possible.

“Shit, Mona you didn’t have to scratch me!” Akira ignores Ryuji’s yowl and instead reaches out for the pork buns.

“At least it wasn’t your face! I don’t think Akira would appreciate it if I scratched your eyeballs out!” Mmm pork buns. Delicious.

 _Pork buns are a delightful change from curry all day every day_ , Akira thinks while nibbling, his boyfriend making fists at the resident team mascot.

...And Akira suddenly thanks the stars Morgana can’t read his mind or else it would be his face without eyeballs.

Makoto snatches the last meat bun from the bag to Akira’s horror and Ann chortles before accidentally choking on a piece of cake. Futaba emulates a certain blue hedgehog when she skids over with a bottle of water readily opened. Akira bets all of his money that Yusuke now has a mini sketch of Unidentified Flying Futaba’s grand journey across Akira’s five star attic room before reaching over to Ann and opening the water bottle for her. She snatches it from him and Akira is vaguely reminded of a faucet when the bottle’s contents are sucked out and its plastic remains are thrown as accurately as possible to the nearest garbage can. The bottle hits the stairs instead, the complete opposite direction of the garbage can.

“Well this is a mess,” Makoto mutters. Akira laughs in response. Ann heaves in air before tearing into her cake like a little kid tears into their presents on Christmas Day. Futaba giggles, Yusuke chuckles, and Morgana’s ready to tear Ryuji a new one but doesn’t have the chance to commit manslaughter when Futaba walks over and picks him up. Ryuji saunters right into Akira’s personal space and snuggles into his side.

 _Cute_ , his brain supplies. Akira readily agrees.

“Alright gang, I say we call this meeting into order,” he remarks. All at once, the playfulness in the air fades. Ann puts down her cake while Morgana perches himself on the couch. Ryuji straightens next to him, but stays close to his side. Akira looks around and nods. _It’s time to get to business._

“There’s a lot to discuss today,” he starts. He curls his fingers over his crossed legs, “I want to start with a question, though.” Akira’s steel eye dart to every pair of eyes on him. “Did you ever think that we were the first Persona users?” Everyone arounds starts at that. Yusuke lowers his pencil.

Silence. Akira closes his eyes to let his group think about it. Minato-senpai and Souji-senpai dropped bombs the number of sand particles on a beach on him yesterday when they video chatted. He already took the time to think about it. He didn’t need to be left along with his thoughts any longer than that.

“...I kinda did.” Ryuji says finally. Akira peers at his blond hair instead of his eyes. “It looked like we were the first ones in the Metaverse. Well, we know that’s not true now maybe, with Akechi and everything…”

“But you know we aren’t.” Everyone nods. “If Akechi had started before us, who’s to say that there are people who started before him?” Akira raises a finger. “There’s been an organization running underground that has been dealing with Shadows called the Shadow Operatives. They’ve been doing it for years, longer than any of us, maybe even longer than Akechi.”

“Dealing with Shadows, like defeating them?” Ann asks, picking at her remaining cake bits, “Like how? As far as we know, the Metaverse is the only way people can see or meet their Shadows and we only take their Treasure, not acutally kill Shadows.” Morgana shakes his head.

“The Metaverse is much bigger than Shibuya and Tokyo, Lady Ann,” Morgana says. “While Mementos is stationed in Shibuya, the Metaverse itself is the collective human unconsciousness. If we could access Mementos from here, there’s no doubt other pockets of the Metaverse can be accessed through other places. There’s also the possibility that other Metaverse pockets have different rules. Not all of them stand for human desire.” Akira nods.

“There were groups that came before us who dealt with Shadows on an equal to or greater scale than us,” he continues. “Now, they've combined to join the SO. I was told they deal with small threats, whatever a small threat a Shadow can be.” Already, the leader can see the gears turning in his teammates’ heads, a well oiled machine creaking to life once more. Makoto stares at him, dead in the eyes, burgundy on slate.

“Are they all Persona users?” she asks.  
  
“I haven’t the slightest idea, but if their main missions include taking out or quelling Shadows, there’s a good chance many of them are,” he replies. Beside him, Ryuji bristles. Akira reflexively grabs his arm to calm him down.

“So might be a whole other team of Persona users out there?! Shit!” he curses, but thankfully does no more. Ann fidgets, her eyes darting everywhere so much that it looks like her eyes are rolling around in their sockets.  
  
“Do they know about us? We have skyrocketed in popularity lately,” she comments nervously. Akira sighs and mentally prepares himself. None of them are going to like this. They’re all, even normally calm and detached Yusuke, already high strung and on guard. Such is the way of children looking to reform society.

“They know and have known ever since Madarame.”

Morgana’s fur stands on end and he stalks across the ratty couch even faster. Makoto and Yusuke visibly tense as Ann’s fork drops on her plate. Futaba fiddles with her phone and a lock of her hair. Akira’s grip on Ryuji’s sleeve tightens into an iron hard lock when he hears Ryuji growl.

“Since Madarame?!” Ryuji barks and Akira has to lean over and basically cuddle up to his side to get him to calm down. He can’t try his usual puns and jokes on him now, not when the tensions is so thick he could probably cut through it.

“Madarame was a relatively niche celebrity, only popular around art critics and the public only knew because it was on the news. How did they find out?” Yusuke asks. Akira sees through his calm façade easily. His normally blank cobalt eyes now contain the promise of murder.

“The only evidence of meddling from the Phantom Thieves then was Kamoshida, but no one believed it when his heart was changed,” Makoto adds. She crosses her arms and hums; Akira pets Ryuji’s hair with his free arm.

Then Futaba suddenly whistles and all attention is on her.

“Damn, these Shadow Operatives are no joke!” she exclaims. Her fingers go a mile a minute and Akira can faintly see letters scrolling down the reflection on her large glasses.

“Report, Oracle.” Futaba tuts.

“They’re founded by the Kirijo Group, known for their high end technological advances. Kirijo Mitsuru herself heads the organization.” Futaba turns the phone so that everyone can see. There is a picture of Mitsuru-senpai herself, a business picture Futaba probably found online. _It’s a little outdated_ , Akira thinks, _she doesn’t have short hair anymore_. “No number of members are released nor what these missions are, but if they’re supported by the Kirijo Group, they’re a pretty big deal.”

“And we’re already on the lookout for Akechi after his stunt on your Social Studies trip.” Makoto’s brow stresses, a hand now on her chin. “If there’s a whole organization of Persona users with more experience under their belt, there’s no doubt that they will be a formidable foe.”

All the Phantom Thieves quiet down. Akira watches his teammates carefully through his glasses, his expression forcefully blank. Ryuji starts fussing next to him and Akira loosens his grip, only for Ryuji to grab his hand and lace their fingers together. He can’t help but smile, but Ryu still looks troubled.

“Damn,” he spat. He looks at Futaba. “Do you know how old they are? How many years do they got over us?”  
  
“Kirijo-san is 30, though we don’t know when she started. She may have started at our age or there’s a possibility she started younger,” she responds. “The people under her might be older, might be younger. I don’t know; they have a really tight hold on their records.” Akira’s eyebrows raise just a bit, barely seen over his glasses but well hidden by his hair. Fuuka-senpai’s programming work must have gone into that then. As a matter of fact, a bunch of his senpais never told him where they worked, just that it was a corporate industry…

Well that was just another lie to add to the pile, wasn’t it? If Akira had been less empathetic and more selfish, he’d be spitting curses at them right now, but he wasn’t. He understood now.

“The point is, the Shadow Operatives contacted me yesterday to tell me to tell you that they wanted to meet. Now that their knowledge of us is out in the open, they want to discuss some things,” Akira explains. “I don’t know what about, about Shadows probably, but they wanted us to decide on a date.” The growing hysteria is starting to show on the others’ faces and actions. Makoto looks ready to tear the table in half.

“Wait wait, how did they get in contact with you? How did they know how to find you?” Futaba demands, throwing herself in Akira’s direction. She looks a little crazed, but she had reason to be. “There’s a government grade security system on each of your phones now, I would have know if someone broke in!” And there it was. Akira sighs and rubs his temples.

“It’s about time I talk about some things,” he says instead. His team stares at him in confusion. Even Ryuji, who pulls away enough that their hands were the only ones linking. Akira stomps down the urge to pull him back (he needs the contact, the comfort, to know he was still there with him—) and instead shuffles around to sit more comfortably. The floor offers no additional support though so he decides to sit at his bed instead. The Phantom Thieves follow like ducklings, pulling chairs along with them or choosing to sit on the floor again. Ryuji takes his place next to Akira with hands still linked.

“Is this is about…?” Makoto trails off, but Akira, and the others, know exactly who she’s talking about.

“My quote unquote fake parents, yes,” Akira replies. He stares at his singular free open palm then shakes his head. His own special brand of anxiety feels like an old friend to him, but he can manage through this. “Don’t judge or lash out at me when I say this, I just found out a few hours ago and I’m still not exactly 100 percent okay.” He glances at each of his teammates before sighing. “Those fake parents I keep talking about? They’re all members of the Shadow Operatives.” He ignores the collective surprised inhale and pushes forward. “In fact, I know Mitsuru-senpai personally, as well as other members.”

Akira waits for someone, anyone, probably Ann, Ryuji, or Morgana, to shout something, but instead, Makoto says, “When did you find out?” Akira vents harshly through his nose. He moves to speak, but a peal of hysterical laughter escapes him instead.

“When I fucked up and sent that picture of us to our group chat,” he croaks. Akira barely notices the PT stare at Ryuji before Ryu’s arms wrap around him comfortably. “You want to know the best thing? They’ve known for a long damn time, but never told me. I’ve known them for almost all of my life, but they kept this a secret from me.” The leader holds up a hand. He knows one or two of his members will say something in retaliation. “I understand, I really do, but it’s always going to end up hurting a little bit.” He chuckles an airy, fake chuckle. “I’m doing the same thing to you guys, after all.” He knows he hit a sore spot when all of his teammates visibly recoil.

“N-No…!” Makoto tries to regain ground, but Akira has already seen it. Mistrust between a tightly knit and synchronized group like the Phantom Thieves was dangerous. The holes needed to be mended before bonds broke and shattered into pieces. If Akira needs to reveal his past (painful, painful,) to keep them together, then he will.

“I was born and raised in Yasoinaba, a tiny town in the middle of nowhere with barely a name to itself other than its inn,” Akira begins. Immediately, his other hand seeks Ryuji’s. He needs to brace himself for the worst. “I remember being there when the string of murders happened, when people were found hanging upside down on antennas. I don’t remember that many details, but I know that was the first time I met Souji-senpai. That year passed by like a blur. Souji-senpai was there, then he had to leave. I hadn’t gotten close to him when he came for the first time, but when he came back to stay permanently, that’s when I actually got to know him.”

“He had come back with more people too, the people who I would eventually know as Minato-senpai and Ryoji-senpai. I was young, I didn’t understand that much then, but they were always there. I had made friends with Souji-senpai’s little sister, Nanako-chan and some of the other elementary school kids, but I was always drawn to them, Souji-senpai, Minato-senpai, Ryoji-senpai, then eventually Junpei-senpai, Chie-sensei, and all of rest of their friends.” Akira laughs, but it was wretched out of him like water being forcefully squeezed out of a towel. He could vaguely feel Ryuji’s arms tighten around him and the Phantom Thieves looking at each other, but the memories he had chosen to forget (focus on the here, the now, the present, not back then—) were coming back.

“I never mention it, but I love my family.” Akira knows that the others are surprised. “My dad is kind and hardworking. He’s the kind of dad who puts their kids’ needs above his own, their kids’ safety over his own. He’s sincere in ways I’m not, and he loves me so much that it— it hurts.” The familiar heat begins to settle on his chest and his throat starts burning. _No, no, no, keep it together_. _Just a little longer_. “All of you would probably get along with him. He’d love all of you guys, Phantom Thieves or not.”

“Is… is he…?” Ann trails off and Akira stares at the ground.

“I love my dad, so much and I would tear the world apart just for him. Do you know why?” —The dam inside him creaks, he should stop, stop right now— “Because he’s all I have left.”

The Phantom Thieves gasp in tandem and Akira feels Ryuji tighten around him in a vice grip. He faintly hears a sob, but he doesn’t know if it’s someone else’s or his own. “My mom and my twin brother died when I was 6,” he forces out. “A car accident from when I was coming back to Inaba from a trip in the city.” His voice wobbles violently as he speaks, but he needs to push through, push past it.

“My mom never made it out alive.”

_His little feet are white noise against the loud roars of flame. Akira dashes around, desperate. He opens his mouth. “Mama! Mama where are you?!”_

“Akira—Akira please stop—” one of the girls beg. Is it Makoto? Ann? Futaba? He doesn’t know.

“I saw my dad there. His arm was missing, but he made it out alive.” _bleeding from everywhere, coherent_ _when he finds him_ —

_Papa’s all red, on the floor by the car’s tire. Akira stops when he sees him. He pales, tears pool and spill, and he screams, “PAPA!”_

Ryuji’s whispering in his ear. Akira grips his shirt tight enough that his knuckles turns white.

“Ren—Ren was my other half. We were those kind of twins, you know. Attached to the hip, went everywhere with each other. We even tricked people by dressing up as each other. He was—”

_Ren stares at him. Akira tries to find something to hold onto, to reassure him everything will be fine, the doctors will come in no time, and he reaches out for his right arm. The left one wasn't there anymore._

_He can’t find Mama. She’s gone and everything, the street, the car in pieces, Ren, Papa, everything is_ red.

—The dam breaks and falls apart. Memories flood in like a tsunami and Akira feels the wetness on his cheeks before he realizes it. A vicious sob tears from his throat. He needs to hold it in, he has to, he can’t let this happen—

—Something soft and fluffy wraps around him. He grips onto it like a lifeline and he whimpers. _Make it stop,_ he begs. _Make it stop..._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I personally have never been through anything like this, so if it's inaccurate, please tell me. Things will get better in the next chapter, don't worry.


	4. Comforting the fluffy son

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the conversation about the Shadow Operatives. Also, Ryuji is super gay for Akira.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> READ CHAPTER 3 FIRST IF YOU HAVEN'T BECAUSE IT'S A DOUBLE UPDATE TODAY.
> 
> Content warnings: thoughts of suicide (mentioned)

**August 20, 2016 (Afternoon)**  
  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Akira?  
**strawberry shortcake** : It’s been a while since we left. We all went home  
**strawberry shortcake** : Are you alright?  
**strawberry shortcake** : Akira?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : not yet  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Alright

* * *

 **fists on wheels** : Is he doing better?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : it took a while but hes sleeping  
  
**fists on wheels** : At least he’s calmed down now  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : We shouldn’t have pushed him like that!  
**strawberry shortcake** : Now i feel horrible!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Arguably, we didn’t know, but hindsight is 20/20.

 **graphic design is my passion** : But to think, his mother was killed in a car accident and his father became permanently disabled... I can’t imagine how hard that must be.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : And he lost his twin brother too, right? Ren?  
  
**fists on wheels** : So those fake parents of his really did end up raising him. They were probably around whenever his father wasn’t.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : It’s daunting how our leader has had such a horrible past.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : guys i dont think aki wants reminders on the group chat  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Shit Futaba can you handle this?  
  
**yeet** : already on it  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : now i really wanna meet these guys!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : They were the ones who help him out probably, right?

 **graphic design is my passion** : Akira calls them family even though they aren’t related, they share quite the bond.  
  
**super fluffy** : Hell yeah we do  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i thought u went to sleep  
  
**super fluffy** : I did, but not for long  
**super fluffy** : Where did you go?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : downstairs. im coming up with leftover curry  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : get the blanket we’re gonna cuddle until u feel better after we eat  
  
**super fluffy** : Ok  
  
**fists on wheels** : We’re so sorry we asked about your family when you didn’t want to share, Akira.  
  
**super fluffy** : It’s fine I should have told all of you sooner anyway  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : It’s not fine! We made you cry!  
  
**super fluffy** : It’s fine it’s fine  
**super fluffy** : Futaba you haven’t texted in a while  
  
**yeet** : im sorry  
**yeet** : im sorry  
  
**super fluffy** : Futaba  
  
**yeet** : i have to know  
**yeet** : did you think to

 **super fluffy** : sometimes  
**super fluffy** : But I couldn’t leave my dad alone by himself. I couldn’t leave the senpai and my friends  
**super fluffy** : All of my fake parents helped me and my dad get through my mom and Ren’s deaths, them and some local kids in Inaba  
**super fluffy** : Nanako-chan had lost her mom to an accident as well  
**super fluffy** : Another kid’s mom committed suicide and his dad abandoned him  
**super fluffy** : I had a very large and thorough support system  
**super fluffy** : I’m doing much better now so there’s no need to worry  
**super fluffy** : It’s just been a while since I’ve had to confront the past so I got overwhelmed

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : put ur phone down we’re gonna cuddle  
  
**super fluffy** : but fffdjhd  
  
**fists on wheels** : I think we could all use the opportunity for some emotional support. Verdict?  
  
**yeet** : im down  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Of course. I am heading there now.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Makoto can you pick me up?  
  
**fists on wheels** : Sure.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : We should bring our onesies!!! Sleepover with them!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Good idea. Ryuji, do I have to come get you to pick yours up?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : nah my ma knows ann she can pick it up if shes willing  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Of course  
  
**fists on wheels** : See you there everyone.

 

**August 21, 2016 (Early Morning)**

Ryuji wakes to August’s soft morning glow. Unlike what a few smartasses in school believe, he was an early riser. Rose with the sun, slept with the sun, as his ma says sometimes. (Not anymore though, since Palaces didn’t give any shits about sleep schedules.) Nothing wakes up the body better than an early morning run around the park after all. Well, video games do the job just as great when you don’t need to stumble out of bed and squint at the sun as if it's personally done you wrong.

He blinks, bleary eyed and tired. He catches a small dust ball ambling its way onto his fluffy white hood with the blackened grin he knew better for shouting hee-ho before getting pelted by nature’s icy fist right in the nuts rather than a mascot character.

...Did Jack Frost the Persona come first, or did Jack Frost the mascot come first?

Alright, he was officially awake if he was facing an existential crisis at this point in the morning. Ryuji almost heaves upright like he does every morning, but something’s tugging at his waist. He looks down.

Aw man, if only he had his phone on him right now.

Akira’s curled up against him, his hood falling halfway down his head. He’s wearing a white Jack Frost onesie like the rest of them, but it just looks downright _adorable_ on him.

...Ryuji knows he has a bias but he doesn’t give any damns whatsoever.

He’s half tempted to try and pull away from Akira’s hold, but that idea immediately gets the boot when Akira mumbles something under his breath and tries—he honestly tries it’s so cute—to burrow deeper into Ryuji’s softness like he one of those pillows with feathers in them. It’s like when a cat decides to sleep on you and you’re immediately deemed as the chosen one who can’t move in fear of interrupting history in the making. (Morgana doesn’t count; if he doesn’t want to be called a cat, he doesn’t get to be treated as one!)

So he’s stuck now. It’s not that bad of a feeling, really.

“Good morning.” Ryuji turns and sees Makoto come up from the stairs, some plates in hand. She’s still wearing her onesie, but her hood is down. “It seems like we’re the only ones awake.”

“Looks like it,” he remarks. Akira has a tight hold on his body, but his arms are free and he takes one of the meat buns (she was probably hiding them somewhere, the sneak!) from her hand. Nearby, Futaba snorts and kicks Yusuke in the ribs. Yusuke says something (Ryuji bets it has something to do with art) before settling down. Makoto giggles.

“I’m glad things have settled down,” she says and Ryuji can’t help but agree.

“Yeah, yesterday was rough.” Makoto nods.

“Akira had quite the load on his shoulders, but I’m glad he was able to share, at least part of it, with us.” Ryuji nibbles on his meat bun as he stares at his snoozing boyfriend. Makoto looks at him. “Did… did you ever expect something like this? About Akira’s past?” He shakes his head.

“Nah. Akira’s always been secretive, so I kinda knew talking about his family was a no go, but he carried a lot more baggage than I thought,” Ryuji muses. He narrows his eyes then shakes his head. Finishing the meat bun in three bites, he glances at Makoto, who was looking at the slowly waking Ann with Morgana curled near her head. “It doesn’t matter anyway. He's Akira even if he had a shitty past. Now that it's in the open, it’s high time to support him.” Makoto chuckles.

“Wow, I’m surprised at your intellect. Are you normally this astute in the morning?” Ryuji guffaws.

“W-what’s that supposed to mean?!” he grouses. Ann shifts and her head bumps right into Morgana’s tail. Makoto shakes her head and instead offers him another meat bun.

“You know I’m kidding, Ryuji. Eat up while I wake up the others. I’ll wake Akira last.” She winks at him. “Or would you do me the honors?” She doesn’t wait for an answer and instead walks up to Ann and Morgana. Ryuji watches as she picks Morgana up and drops him right on Ann.

Ryuji quickly turns away to avoid the literal cat fight that was break out and looks down at Akira. He pokes at his vice grip. Not even a movement. He pokes at his hair. No twitch. He pokes his eyelid. Nothing. He thinks for a bit. What could wake someone like Akira from the dead?

Oh. He knows.

Ryuji leans over as best he can and moves his love’s hair from away his ear. Oh boy, was he going to regret this later. He inhales and blows straight into Akira’s ear.

Akira’s _everything_ vibrates and then Ryuji finds himself on his back on the floor while Akira wildly flings off anything in arms reach. He groans but doesn’t move until Akira calms down enough to realize no, it wasn’t a Shadow that used a new tactic to blow his skin and muscles off of his bones, it was his boyfriend trying to wake him up in a way that would only guarantee pain. Ryuji pointedly ignores the snickering behind him (effin’ cat!) when Akira peers at him. Ryuji waves.

“Mornin’, Aki,” he drawls as nonchalantly as he can manage. Akira’s eyelashes flutter (shit he had really long eyelashes) before he smiles, small and, there is no other word for this lads, cute.

...Ryuji’s realized how gay he is now, don’t worry.

“Sorry about that, Ryu,” Akira says, voice still heavy with sleep. He stands and stretches out his arms then reaches down and offers a hand to his boyfriend. Ryuji, of course, accepts it and Akira hauls him up to his feet. Both of them grin at each other.

“No tomfoolery in this house!” Morgana screeches from behind them and the cat shoves his way between them. “There are guests!”

Ryuji pouts. The damn cat’s never fun.

“I have to agree,” Makoto says by the table. “There is still business to discuss.” She had woken up Yusuke, looking as pristine and elegant as he can in a Jack Frost onesie while eating breakfast. Futaba was somewhere between the land of the living and of the dead when she drags herself from the floor to the food like a zombie. Ann is by the table now and Ryuji ignores the subtle scratch marks on her face. Yeowch.

Akira and Ryuji make their way over and Ryuji takes the plate of curry from Ann’s hands. “What else do we need to talk about?” he asks before taking a bite, “Might as we’ll finish our talk over breakfast.” His eyes turns to his boyfriend. “Akira?”

Akira hums. “Well, first things first, I have to apologize for the breakdown.” Ryuji almost chokes on his next bite. He says that so nonchalantly, as if seeing his normally confident and calm leader hysterically sobbing wasn’t the most terrifying thing in the universe. Ryuji glances at the others; they’re thinking the same thing.

“You don’t have to apologize over something you didn’t have any control over,” Yusuke says. His sketchbook has magically appeared from nowhere, but he keeps it closed on his lap. “Emotions are never something that can be taken lightly. Bottling them up will only make things worse before they can get better.”

“But—“

“Uh uh uh, stop before you go off in a tangent,” Ann cuts off. “It was scary for us, seeing you like that, but that’s what makes you human, Akira. You loved your mom and Ren so much that you cried for them when you remembered them. It’s touching.”

“But yeah, we’re here for you, Akira.” Ryuji elbows his boyfriend lightly, playfully. Akira looks at him. “Now that you’ve told us, let us be a part of that support system you’ve got going on. You’ve got your fake parents and their friends in Inaba,” he grins widely, “and you’ve got us here in Tokyo!”

God he hoped was the right thing to say. He was never the best at reassuring people.

Futaba makes a noise Ryuji thinks means she agrees with him. The others nod.

“You guys…” Aw shit, Akira’s gonna start crying—

Akira laughs and it’s a laugh that is music to his ears. He wipes the corner of his eyes and with a grin, says, “Thank you, you guys.”

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : Morning guys

 **Walking Spoon** : Good morning. I don’t think Minato’s up yet.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : It’s fine  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Anyway I talked to the PT yesterday and this morning  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Is the 28th good for you?

 **Walking Spoon** : I’ll check with the others. Thanks for the quick reply, by the way. Minato and I both realized how much we’re putting on you after the fact.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : It’s cool  
**Tiny Munchkin** : You’ve been secretive since I was little so I’m not as a surprised as I would have been just disappointed

 **Walking Spoon** : You wouldn’t have believed us if we told you.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : I know don’t worry  
**Tiny Munchkin** : I told the gang about you guys by the way and I had to tell them about Mom and Ren

 **Walking Spoon** : How are you feeling?

 **Tiny Munchkin** : I feel like shit but it’s not too bad  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Ryu and the others helped me through it I’m fine now  
**Tiny Munchkin** : They really wanna meet you guys and thank you and stuff but don’t tell them I said that it was supposed to be a surprise

 **Walking Spoon** : I won’t, I won’t.  
**Walking Spoon** : Some of us are going to be stopping by now, you know that right?  
**Walking Spoon** : A bunch of the SO live in Tokyo because it’s the main headquarters

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Whoa shit really

 **Walking Spoon** : Of course. I don’t have time this week, being a teacher and all but I think Yosuke will drop by at some point. Maybe in the weekend I can visit.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Gotta prepare myself then  
**Tiny Munchkin** : How is Yosuke-senpai doing? How are both of you doing with you know

 **Walking Spoon** : The wedding’s getting closer and Rise is totally ape shit on its preparations

 **Tiny Munchkin** : And you’re not

 **Walking Spoon** : I think Yosuke and I would actually kill someone who ruins our wedding with the amount of effort we put into it

 **Tiny Munchkin** : I’m still invited right

 **Walking Spoon** : Of course. Your friends are as well.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Really? You haven’t even met them yet

 **Walking Spoon** : Teams of Persona users are inseparable. Our wedding isn’t going to a normal wedding either, so of course they’re invited.  
**Walking Spoon** : I’ll run it through with Yosuke first but I think he would agree.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Sweet  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Talk to you later senpai we’re going out to the movies we’re gonna try to throw popcorn at the screen and make holes in it from all the way in the back

 **Walking Spoon** : Good luck to you then.  
**Walking Spoon** : Before you go, there’s something I want to talk to you about.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : What is it?

 

  
**< No Name>**  
  
**Kurusu Akira** : Hello.  
 **Kurusu Akira** : It’s been a while, hasn’t it?  
 **Kurusu Akira** : I almost didn’t believe Souji-senpai when he said that he still contacted you after you left Inaba.  
 **Kurusu Akira** : I would ask you what you’ve been up to, but I can already guess.  
 **Kurusu Akira** : I recognized you when we met, you know. I was too surprised to say anything at the time.  
 **Kurusu Akira** : Is this all part of some grand scheme of yours? Why you left Inaba? Why you left Dojima-san and Nanako-chan?  
 **Kurusu Akira** : When you have the opportunity, I’d like to meet up. I know your schedule’s usually full, so I’ll let you decide.  
 **Kurusu Akira** : See you whenever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your regularly scheduled memes will return in the next chapter.


	5. are we talking about weDDINGS?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Futaba's side mission has been completed and the group talks about the upcoming wedding they've been invited to. Also, Yusuke is innocent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *SHOUTS LOUDLY* THERE ARE SO MANY HEADCANONS GUYS I'M

**August 23, 2016 (Noon)**

 

**— > Enter Here For Gays and Thieving <—**

**Morganya:** testing testing.

 **strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : holy shit futaba actually did it  
  
**Morganya** : hi guys!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hi Mona!!!!!  
  
**Morganya** : hi lady ann!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Wow, I'm impressed.  
  
**yeet** : i put morgana in the pt chat too and b/c of necronomicon his sentences become automatically grammatically correct when he "texts" so the pt chat stays "serious"  
  
**Morganya** : finally i won't have to look over akira's shoulder anymore!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : What exactly did you make?  
  
**yeet** : im glad u asked inari  
**yeet** : its a speech-to-text little gadget i attached to his collar. its like one of those iWatches but it can call and text exclusively for mona  
**yeet** : voice activated of course because mona has no thumbs but it has a different charger from any other technology. i gave it akira already so its his responsibility to charge it. luckily i gave it a long enough battery life to last a few days  
**yeet** : it also comes with a special brand of cat ear phones so that he can have private calls and have the texts read to him. i help him fit it so he should be fine in the real world and in the metaverse  
  
**super fluffy** : Quest completed good job futaba  
  
**yeet** : aw yeah  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey hey do u think boss will be able to understand morgana now  
  
**yeet** : he’ll still hear cat noises whenever mona talks but i think they could talk through a phone like a phone call since the device filters monas mews to japanese

 **Morganya** : this is really cool guys.  
**Morganya** : thanks.

 **yeet** : no thanks needed mona  
**yeet** : u can also open different file links that we send u. here try it out. say “open file link” and it should open  
**yeet** :  formorgana.mp3 

**Morganya** : okay  
**Morganya** : HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ARE YOU FOR FUCKIN REAL FUTABA

 **strawberry shortcake** : OMFG

 **super fluffy** : i m actaul lyd ying fukc you futaba

 **Morganya** : I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU FUTABA I JUST GOT HERE.

 **yeet** : :D

 **graphic design is my passion** : I happen to like this song. Rick Astley is quite the nice singer.

 **fists on wheels** : ...If anyone dares to turn Yusuke into a memer I will kill all of you.

 **super fluffy** : Noted

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yes ma’am

 **strawberry shortcake** : Don’t worry about it he’s kind of hopeless

 **graphic design is my passion** : Do you mind sending me this file, Futaba? I would like to add it to my list of songs I listen to.

 **yeet** : ...u know u can just download it from here rite

 **graphic design is my passion** : Ah yes I had forgotten.

 **super fluffy** : Yusuke for purest member of the group chat say aye

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : aye

 **strawberry shortcake** : Aye

 **yeet** : aye

 **fists on wheels** : Aye.

 **Morganya** : what about me?!

 **fists on wheels** : You live with Akira; you’re automatically disqualified.

 **Morganya** :  maybeso.gif 

**fists on wheels** : That just proves my point.

 **graphic design is my passion** : Fascinating.

 **super fluffy** : Since we’re all here I have a very important announcement  
  
**fists on wheels** : Shouldn’t it be on the Phantom Thieves chat then?  
  
**super fluffy** : Nothing thief related but more fake parents and us related  
**super fluffy** : You’re all invited to attend Souji-senpai’s wedding in a few months  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG  
  
**yeet** : wedding?!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : holy shit!!!!!! the only times i see weddings are on netflix!!  
  
**Morganya** : wow do you ever go out?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shut up you effin cat!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Well, this is a surprise. I’d never thought we would ever get something like a wedding invite from anyone as the Phantom Thieves.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Weddings uphold a certain passion and elegance one cannot find anywhere else. Will it be rude to paint the scenery of the venue on the day, Akira?  
  
**super fluffy** : Souji-senpai’s pretty chill with anything so I guess it’s fine  
**super fluffy** : Thing is, I don’t really know where it’s taking place  
**super fluffy** : Where the hell is the Midnight Channel?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sounds like some club or somethin

 **super fluffy** : You know what it probably is  
**super fluffy** : Anyway Souji-senpai told me to tell y’all as a heads up. His fiancé will be coming by to make it official  
  
**fists on wheels** : Make it official?  
  
**super fluffy** : Yeah!!! They’ve whipped up wedding invitations for each of you guys to make it legit  
**super fluffy** : They’ve even made one for Morgana  
  
**Morganya** : finally someone else appreciates me other than this group of losers.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Ahem.  
  
**Morganya** : face it makoto you’re as much as a loser as these guys once you joined the party.  
  
**fists on wheels** : That doesn’t necessarily mean I want it verbalized.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : we haven’t met them tho???? why do they want us to come??  
  
**super fluffy** : Something about Persona teams being inseparable I dunno  
**super fluffy** : But they want you guys to come since I’m coming  
**super fluffy** : You’re all my plus 1s  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : sHDHSGDGSHDB  
**strawberry shortcake** : DHFVYAIEVV W DHDVD D DGY  
  
**yeet** : look what uve done akira u broke ann  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Not to worry, I know exactly how to fix her.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Shiho.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT  
  
**yeet** : mission complete plus 500 exp to inari  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I don’t exactly know how to respond to that, but I am grateful.  
  
**yeet** : good u should be  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : whats the big deal ann?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I’M SORRY I JUST LOVE??????  
**strawberry shortcake** : WEDDINGS????????  
**strawberry shortcake** : BECAUSE THE BRIDE AND GROOM OR BRIDES AND GROOMS USUALLY LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL AND/OR HANDSOME AND SOMETIMES WEDDINGS CAN BE REALLY CHEESY OR REALLY FUN AND  
**strawberry shortcake** : IN SHORT I’M HONORED AND EXCITE  
  
**fists on wheels** : I admit, I’ve never been to a wedding before.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : :OOOOOOOOO  
  
**yeet:**  neither have i  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I as well.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : same here  
  
**Morganya** : i obviously haven’t.  
  
**super fluffy** : ...Am i the only other one who’s been in a wedding  
  
**yeet** : probably  
  
**Morganya** : looks like he’s been through a lot of them  
  
**fists on wheels** : How can you tell, Morgana?  
  
**Morganya** : he’s making faces at his screen like he just sucked on a lemon.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** :  exposed.png  
  
**super fluffy** : Exposed by my cat and memed by boyfriend what a world we live in  
**super fluffy** : rhdgeirgoaryj  
  
**yeet** : omg did mona just hit akira  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : It seems so.  
  
**super fluffy** : Anyway I grew up with 20+ people and half had the hots for each other of course i was in a lot of weddings  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Were you anything ~special~ Akira?  
  
**super fluffy** : I was the ring bearer for a lot of them  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Aw how cute!!  
  
**super fluffy** : And i was the ring bearer dressed as a flower girl in one  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : NO WAY  
  
**yeet** : PICS OR IT DIDNT HAPPEN  
  
**super fluffy** : SUCK IT LOSERS I DON’T HAVE ANY OF THOSE PICTURES ON MY PHONE HAHA  
  
**yeet** : FUCK  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : fhevdualrbudv  
  
**Morganya** : lady ann?!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I believe Ann has broken again.

 

 **HEADPHONES SQUAD (+Rise)** [Minato, Yosuke, Akira, Rise] **  
****  
****Red Star** : Hey guys when you meet the PT can you not show them the pictures of me at Chie-sensei and Yukiko-senpai’s wedding thanks  
  
**Blue Moon** : no promises  
  
**Yellow Circle** : partner has them between the two of us so you could ask him.  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : owo  
  
**Red Star** : RISE-SENPAI DON’T YOU DARE  
  
**Blue Moon** : why did you choose to tell us in a chat rise was in you know she’ll cause trouble  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : Because i’m akira’s favorite senpai~  
  
**Red Star** : Uh it was because this was the most recent chat for me but sure let’s go with that  
  
**Yellow Circle** : oh akira since you’re here...  
  
**Red Star** : What’s up senpai?  
  
**Yellow Circle** : i’m popping by yongen-jaya tomorrow and i’ll be swinging by leblanc.  
  
**Red Star** : !!!!!!!! Cool! Oh yeah, we were just talking about your and Souji-senpai’s wedding  
**Red Star** : I told them they’re invited

 **Blue Moon** : i’m not even surprised that it’ll be in the midnight channel  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : But of course!!!! That’s where Yosuke-senpai and Souji-senpai’s love blossomed~!  
  
**Yellow Circle** : rise please...!  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : And Souji-senpai’s made quite the impact on Yosuke-senpai!! Look at him!! He’s actually finishing his sentences with periods now!  
  
**Yellow Circle** : RISE STOP.  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : NEVER~.  
  
**Red Star** : Question question where’s this Midnight Channel you guys keep talking about? Sounds like a club  
  
**Blue Moon** : it’s in the metaverse

 

 **— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—** **  
** **  
** **super fluffy** : OKAY APPARENTLY SOUJI-SENPAI’S WEDDING IS SOME PHANTOM THIEVES RELATED SHIT WHAT THE FUCK  
  
**fists on wheels** : What?!  
  
**yeet** : oh shit  
  
  
  
**HEADPHONES SQUAD (+ Rise)** **  
** **  
** **Red Star** : !!!!?!!??!!?!?!?!?!???!! I’M ALARMED  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : Don’t be! After our business in Inaba the Midnight Channel’s much calmer. Shadows don’t appear hostile anymore!  
  
**Red Star** : ARE YOU SURE  
  
**Yellow Circle** : we’re having everyone bring their weapons to the wedding just in case it goes off the deep end.

 **Blue Moon** : do you allow firearms  
  
**Yellow Circle** : everything including grenade launchers.  
  
**Blue Moon** : sweet  
  
**Red Star** : Omg  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : Did you honestly think Souji-senpai and Yosuke-senpai’s wedding could ever be normal?  
  
**Red Star** : You right  
**Red Star** : I have so many questions about your wedding now holy shit  
  
**Yellow Circle** : no more questions akira.  
  
**Red Star** : HHHHHHHHHHH  
  
**Yellow Circle** : leblanc’s still in the same place?  
  
**Red Star** : Wait you know where it is?  
  
**Yellow Circle** : sure do.  
  
**Blue Moon** : you worked there for a while right  
  
**Red Star** : Wait what  
  
**Yellow Circle** : i did during university to pay for tuition. how do you think sojiro knows who you are and he’s the one you got sent to?  
  
**Red Star** : You know what that makes sense  
**Red Star** : Dad hates coffee  
  
**Yellow Circle** : i’ll be coming by at around 11 in the morning tomorrow. invite your friends if you want to.  
  
**Red Star** : Will do  
  
**ACTUAL IDOL** : Okay guys there’s some new American songs that came out that I’m pretty sure we’ll hate so let’s listen to them together!!!!!!  
  
**Blue Moon** : sweet i can’t wait for my ears to bleed

  
  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—** **  
** **  
** **super fluffy** : My fellow gays, thieves, and gay thieves the universe is favoring us today Souji-senpai’s fiancé is coming by tomorrow and he says y’all can come by to meet him  
  
**yeet** : sweet  
  
**fists on wheels** : What time is he coming?  
  
**super fluffy** : 11

 **yeet** : ugh in the morning

 **super fluffy** : Yes you little mole

 **yeet** : gross

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i’m in akihabara now do you want something babe  
  
**super fluffy** : If you can get another one of those plushies from the crane games i will give you ten thousand smooches  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : !!!!!!!! GOTCHA  
  
**Morganya** : look now he’s motivated.  
  
**super fluffy** : You know the usual routine. Bring snacks and Yusuke is going to draw the highest stack of cans we can stack on my TV  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I look forward to any unorthodox positions you may come up with.  
  
**super fluffy** : Okay gang get over here by 10 or 10:30 tomorrow and be yourselves though I don’t think Yosuke-senpai would mind if you act completely insane  
  
**yeet** : wh

 **super fluffy** : ?  
  
**yeet** : yosuke? as in hanamura yosuke?  
  
**super fluffy** : Yes?????  
  
**yeet** : OMG NO WAY  
**yeet** : HOLY FUCK

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : wait what the fuck is happening  
  
**super fluffy** : ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
  
  
  
**we eat nails for breakfast** [Minato, Yosuke, Rise]  
  
**☆Dom** : Hey should i visit too and just scare the shit out of akira and his friends  
  
**Jesus-kun** : that’s fuck up  
  
**FROG OF VIOLENCE** : well i didn’t expect that coming from you.  
  
**Jesus-kun** : do it  
  
**FROG OF VIOLENCE** : wait that’s a lie do it for the shits and giggles kouhai.  
  
**☆Dom** : :3c

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You bet that wedding's getting written.


	6. The Leaning Tower of Dr. Salt Arginade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phantom Thieves engage in a team building exercise as they expect the ex-Prince of Junes to pay a visit. They get an extra visitor and they learn about one branch of the SO: Inaba's Seekers of the Truth, the Investigation Team. Also, they get questioned.
> 
> Minor edit: Tier 2 Personas changed to Tier 3.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, this chapter was supposed to be 3,000 words but my fingers and brain said hell no and made it about 8,500 instead kick me.
> 
> More worldbuilding!!!! Because headcanons need context!!!
> 
> I also provided links to the different songs I listened to to write the story parts to get the atmosphere going. I highly recommend listening to each song for each part of the story to get the feel of it. They're all extended versions by the way. Some parts don't work for some songs, but most do. Also note, there are no song recommendations for the chat parts, so yeah.

**August 24, 2016 (Morning)**

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—** ****  
**  
** **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i got u a plushie babe!!!!! but i bought it not won it  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i think ur gonna love it  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : goin there now!!!!  
  
**super fluffy** : Thanks love~  
  
**yeet** : gross  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
  
**super fluffy** : WHAT THE FUCK YUSUKE

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : THE FUCK

 **fists on wheels** : ALRIGHT WHO DID IT.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : SHIT MAKO’S ON THE WARPATH  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : WE GONNA DIE  
  
**super fluffy** : I BLAME FUTABA  
  
**yeet** : WHAT THE HELL ITS NOT ME  
**yeet** : MONA WAS IT YOU  
  
**Morganya** : NO?! I’M NOT EVEN NEAR HIM TO SHOW HIM ANYTHING!  
  
**fists on wheels** : ONE OF YOU IS GOING TO FESS UP OR FISTS WILL FLY.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : HOLY SHIT  
  
**yeet** : SOMEONE DID IT IM NOT GONNA DIE BEFORE FINDING MORE BLACKMAIL MATERIAL FROM AKIRAS CHILDHOOD  
  
**super fluffy** : HEY FUCK YOU  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Oh, my apologies, I was away from my phone so I didn’t see the notifications.  
**graphic design is my passion** : To answer your questions, it was me. There is no reason for homicide, Makoto.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : What???? Yusuke????????  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I had come across the emoticon portion of the keyboard and had been simply scrolling through it. I accidentally pressed on the one I had sent.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Since it had garnered such an intense reaction, pray tell, what does it mean?  
  
**fists on wheels** : No one tell him.  
  
**super fluffy** : Got it  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Sure  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : k  
  
**Morganya** : of course.  
  
**yeet** : look it up  
  
**fists on wheels** : Futaba.  
  
**yeet** : what? if he’s the one actively looking for what it means we’re not corrupting him hes just corrupting himself!!!

 **super fluffy** : She’s right

([Persona 5: Break it Down](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDGHbk8uupk))

Akira is faintly aware of LeBlanc’s door opening and Makoto commenting that she still didn’t like it, but he doesn’t give that thought the time of day while he shoves breakfast down his gullet. Ann is there already, with bags of cans and bottles she brought from home and ones the team had single handedly drank down when Akira gave them his special curry with love the temperature of the fucking sun. Futaba is there too and films him accidentally choking on a piece of meat. He coughs, sending it flying gracefully into the sidewall. It bounces off and hits the table with a wet smack.

“Gross,” Futaba spits but she sounds neither grossed out nor disgusted as she giggles gleefully at another piece of blackmail she no doubt attained. He’s really got to stop giving her chances to make his live worth living in a volcano instead. “Hiya Makoto!” she crows from her perch.

“Make sure you clean that up,” Sojiro grouses. Preferring to live and not become a target of a coffee cup, Akira keeps the comment of how there aren't any customers here to begin with inside and instead replies with, “Don’t worry, I’m not a slob like _someone_ we know.” He glances at Futaba surreptitiously. She flings a fork in his direction as a response. _Shit, fork!!_ He ducks, narrowly avoids getting nailed in the eyes. The fork flies right into the door of LeBlanc and clatters noisily onto the ground. Thank god for whatever there was that she threw it immediately, because if she didn’t, it would have stabbed Ryuji, who was coming in, right in the pec.

“Shit!” he shouts. Ryuji flails wildly like the fork was a missle out to get him rather than an old piece of cutlery. Ever the sport, he careens his way into the booth by the door and lands face first on the old cushions.

Ann snorts, sipping whatever’s in her thermos before going to pick up the abused fork. Sojiro just looks defeated. Akira would feel bad, but he knows ol’ coffee dad expects something like this from a pack of teenagers that live and breath coffee everyday.

Makoto hums and walks over to the counter for Sojiro’s breakfast special of curry and coffee. Akira dances his way into the kitchen and begins working on battling the dishes against their grimy selves as Makoto sits next to Futaba and smiles at her. The raw power in that smile could make him quiver in his boots if he actually had boots on. “Your aim is getting better by the day, Futaba,” he hears her say. “Keep at it.” God, the girls in his team are scary. Actively ignoring how Futaba and Makoto were scheming to make Futaba a walking talking death machine like the rest of them, he finishes up the dishes in record time, wipes his hands, and strolls up to his downed boyfriend, who is still ass up on the cushion.

No no gay thoughts, stay inside. Don’t give Sojiro a reason to use the knives in the back as darts.

“I can’t believe my boyfriend is fucking dead,” he quips. He hears Ann laugh behind him before she says something to the other two girls. She’s probably joining them in their plans for mass destruction.

Ryuji turns onto his back and Akira is graced with a wonderful sight of Ryuji’s shirt riding up his torso. _Holy shit_ , he wheezes internally but externally he just smiles and offers his hand. Keep it together, Kurusu. Ryuji grapples his hand and heaves onto his feet.

“Mornin’, Aki,” he greets before yawning a little bit. “Sorry, stayed up late a bit to finish off a level.” He grins. Akira’s heart implodes into butterflies.

“It’s alright. Good morning to you too,” he greets back. He pulls his boyfriend in for a little smooch on the nose, delicate and light and Ryuji hums under his breath. “Come on, let’s get you some energy.” Akira pulls Ryuji over to Sojiro. Looks like there’s already a plate of curry and a bottle of soda ready for him. Praise Sakura Sojiro, best coffee dad in existence.

“Looks like your whole gang’s almost here,” he drawls. Akira nurses a new cup of coffee in his hands—Blue Mountain, he figures once he sips it—while Ryuji chows down on his food like it was the last meal he would ever have. But then again, he always eats like that.

“Yusuke might have gotten distracted by a building, an animal, or a person again,” Ann says from her table. She opens the thermos she has and finishes off its entire contents. It looks like a strawberry milkshake was in there, but who would have a milkshake 10:30 in the morning? Oh wait, Ann would. She stands and asks Sojiro if she can clean out her thermos. He lets her go to the back. “Oh yeah, Ryuji!” she calls and Ryuji perks up, his spoon in his mouth. “What’s in that plastic bag you brought in?”

The said plastic bag sits lonesome on the table Ryuji had deemed as protection from killer forks. His eyes light up. He bounces off the seat and towards the plastic bag, lifting it into his hands. Pulling the spoon from his mouth, Ryuji passes the plastic bag to Akira. “It’s the plushie I got ya! Open it!” Akira chuckles. Alrighty then. He unties the loose tie on the plastic bag and opens it.

Oh. He knows this make.

“Whoa, who is that?!” The party, plus Futaba, who shouted, gathers around their leader to stare at the small plush that he lifts from the bag. Ryuji’s grins is wide enough to split his face in half and Futaba looks ready to pounce on Akira to get her hands on the curious treasure. Morgana had scampered onto his shoulder, giving the plushie a critical cat’s eye. Makoto examines it closely and Ann looks like she wants to touch it, but is afraid to. Honestly, Akira feels like the same.

Behind them, the door of LeBlanc opens. Akira doesn't need to turn around to know that Yusuke had just come in, with or without Futaba’s sudden shout of “Inari!”. He glances at his periphery when the art student come close to him. He bows at Sojiro, who nods back. “I apologize for being late,” he says, walking up to them. “There was a matter I had to—” He pauses. “Who is that?”

Akira and the others shrug. Even Ryuji shrugs, which is weird. “You don’t even know what you bought and yet you still bought it?” Makoto questions. Ryuji grimaces at her.

“Hey, I was thinkin’ about somethin’ else when I was buying it!” he exclaims. He starts waving his hands around excitedly. “So there was this guy selling plushies in front of the arcade; was totally bizarre since I’ve never seen him before. So I go up and ask about the stuff he’s got, right. From what the guy was sayin’, a lot of it is from this guy who makes plushies in his free time in Inaba, so I was like, ‘hey, ‘Kira’s from Inaba, maybe he knows the guy’, so I bought the one that looked the coolest!” Ryuji sounds so proud of himself and Akira really is proud of him, but he just can’t help but feel as if he should know the small plushie he’s holding. Words are making their rounds into shredders in his unconscious so Akira lets his heart, as cheesy as it sounds, do the thanking, walking, arm moving, and hey, look at that, they’re kissing now.

Morgana screeches and ducks for cover. Ann and Makoto smile and Yusuke walks over by Sojiro asking for curry. There’s a click from the side which he’s pretty sure is from Futaba. The two lovers grin at each other before Akira looks down at the plush in his hands. It’s certainly one he’s never seen before, with a grey mask, a black coat, and a white headband. The little thing’s carrying a naginata too, how cute.

“Come on guys, now that everyone’s here, let’s start stacking the cans and bottles on Akira’s TV!” Ann exclaims. “Any of you guys have masking tape?” Makoto sticks her hand into her pocket and pulls out a full roll of masking tape while Ryuji pulls out a pair of scissors from who knows where. _A ha ha ha_ , Akira laughs in his head when Futaba cheerfully brings out a different pair of scissors, clearly better from the other ones since this one has patterns built into the blade and Yusuke takes out a can of rubber cement, _I’ve created monsters._

“Team building exercises are the best! What do you want, Inari?” Futaba asks their enthusiast. Hopefully nothing too drastic. No bottle and can Mona Lisas or Starry Nights ever again thank you.

“I would like to suggest making buildings from the bottles and cans,” he answers. “I don’t do still life and observational drawings as often as I should and as an artist, I must continue to hone my skills in other areas in order for me to continue developing my pieces.”

“Thank god for small miracles!” Ann laughs and the joke has probably gone way over Yusuke’s head but Akira, and probably the rest of them, are too relieved to not be mimicking something like the Venus de Milo. Then he would actually pack his bags and jump into a volcano for the rest of his life.

The door of the cafe opens again, but he pays it no heed and instead suggests different buildings and cuts they can make into the metal cans and plastic bottles. He faintly hears Sojiro’s surprised hum as he tries to convince Yusuke that making the Louvre or the Palace of Versailles was impossible if they wanted to put it on top of his TV. Whoever came in laughs and Akira stops mid sentence. There’s only one person who laughed like that.

The Phantom Thieves turn. The man by the door—familiar copper brown hair parted a little to the side with a glasses perched on his nose—waves and suddenly, Akira feels like he’s back in Inaba. “Looks like there’s a party here. Did I come at a bad time?”

([Persona 4: Like a dream come true](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLESWPUnVss))

“Yosuke-senpai!” Akira exclaims, beaming. Hanamura Yosuke stands there with a wide grin. He looks like he came from work, his messenger bag slung over his shoulder with what Akira knew to be folders with sheets of music inside. His headphones, new ones Souji had gotten him as a birthday present, sit comfortably around his neck. He’s wearing a shirt Akira’s pretty sure is Souji’s and dark blue jeans (in August, why senpai?). _Looks like he still hasn’t cut his hair since the last time I saw him_ , he muses, noticing his small rat’s rail.

He shoves the odd little plushie in Yusuke’s direction as delicately (read: hastily and with the worst butter fingers) as possible but a green blur suddenly flies past him. And then the world is making no sense because the resident hermit of the group runs and tackles the stranger to them all except Akira while laughing giddily.

“Oh my gosh oh my gosh it is you, Kerosuke!!” she squeals directly into Yosuke’s ear (Akira can claim he knows exactly how that feels). Yosuke looks surprised—who wouldn’t?—then tries to look at Futaba.

“Holy—no way, is that you, Futaba?!” He sounds so confused and Akira feels just as confused and the team is probably so confused that if confusion was tangible, a wave would be crashing to them as we speak, but Yosuke just laughs. Laughs, hugs Futaba back, and Akira feels like something is missing. “You’ve grown!” Yeah, something is missing. They let go of each other and Futaba grins up at him.

“Of course, you idiot. It’s been years since I’ve last seen you!”

“Hey, stop saying things like that, you’re making me sound old.”

“You are old, you old fart,” she teases.

To further confuse things, Sojiro is giving Yosuke the same look he gives them while Yosuke and Futaba banter: the “goddamn-these-kids-are-annoying-as-shit-but-they’re-the-best-kids-a-man-could-ever-have” look and doesn’t seem bothered at all. He smirks. “Well well well, look what the cat dragged in.” Yosuke laughs again while he makes his way to him. They shake hands.

“Nice to see you again too, Sojiro,” he says and Akira takes that chance to run up to his senpai.

“Wait—shit, Aki—!” 147 pounds of flying Japanese delinquent crashes straight into him and his hands do the equivalent of the mambo before securing them around his exuberant charge. “You little shit,” he seethes but Akira knows he’s glad to see him because his fake anger is easier to spot than Yusuke in a sea of short people. Now touch his equipment or backtalk Souji and even the powers of the gods and devils can’t save you from an early grave.

“I’m your little shit~!” Akira sings and koalas himself around Yosuke so that his arms are around Yosuke’s neck and his legs are around his waist. His friends look scared but intrigued and Yusuke’s cataloguing the multitude of emotions Yosuke is making because there is no way eyes can possibly roll that hard.

Yosuke frowns at him the Frown of Incredulity saved for only Akira’s stupidest stunts before he pulls Akira’s arms over his head, dislodging his legs, and makes him fall flat on the ground. Dick. “Looks like you’re doing fine and dandy, Aki,” he remarks and examines his nails. Akira pouts. He heaves, standing up with the grace, elegance, and extraness of an overeager swan. Yosuke rolls his eyes again. Ryuji gurgles behind him.

“Same to you! Old age finally wearing you down?” he asks with the fake interested tone he only uses for his teachers. And then there’s a hand driving noogies into his already hopelessly messy hair and yep, this is Yosuke alright. “Hey! Quit it!!” he yowls.

“Come on, you giggly little shit, it’s been way too long since I’ve done this to you!”

“Wow, who’s bright nickname is that? Akihiko-senpai’s?” Akira laughs and he swats at Yosuke’s hands.

“Blatantly insulting Akihiko? What happened to the respectful student from the early days?” Akira sticks his tongue out.

“Using the word blatantly? What happened to my dumb senpai?” Yosuke laughs and Akira tries laughing but his hair keeps flying in his mouth so it comes out as sputtered chuckles. He lets go of him. Akira whirls around to his friends, meaning to say something, but he tips over too much and crashes straight into Makoto. She catches him before his face meets the cold unforgiving floor of LeBlanc.

“Whoa there,” she says and she’s smirking at him.

Ignoring Yosuke’s snorts, Akira pulls himself upright. “Thanks, Makoto.”

“Pay it no mind, Akira.” She turns to Yosuke and walks over to him. She smiles. “It’s nice to finally meet one of these fake parents Akira’s been mentioning in person,” she remarks after she gives him a short bow. “My name is Niijima Makoto, nice to meet you.” Yosuke’s eyebrow quirks up.

“Wow, a respectful friend? With Akira?” he asks and wow, Futaba looks like one of those bobble heads because her whole body is just having dance of epic proportions.

“It’s more likely than you think!” she finishes. Akira feels bad for everyone who expected Yosuke to be normal.

“Rude,” he snips, elbowing him in the side. “So, anyone else up for introductions?”

“Ah!” Ann bows to Yosuke. When she pulls up, she gives him a smile that can even make the Reaper’s ice cold heart melt. Somewhere, a rainbow formed with unicorns frolicking through its color veil. _Note to self; let up on the clinical trials,_ Akira thinks. “I’m Takamaki Ann, Akira’s classmate!”

“I am Kitagawa Yusuke, a student from Kosei High,” says their resident art student next. He doesn’t bow like the girls and instead nods his head at Yosuke. He jerks his head to Morgana, who was now perched on one of the seats of the counter. “That there is Morgana, Akira’s cat.” Yosuke glances at Akira.

“You have a cat now?” he asks, surprised. Akira’s never been much of a cat whisperer; that was Souji’s job.

“Special circumstances. With you know…” Akira waves his hand around vaguely. He can’t really say anything Metaverse related with Sojiro around after all. Yosuke did know apparently, because he raises an eyebrow at him.

“If you ever bring Partner here, you know he’s going to be all over your cat, right?” Akira blinks. Ah yes. Another note to self; keep Souji away from Morgana to prevent his Magician from getting smothered by cat toys and from clawing out Souji’s face. Yosuke looks at Ryuji and oh there it is. Surfacing anxiety, his old friend.

Akira moves away from his senpai to Ryuji and grabs his hand. He knows the other has never been good with crowds, what with the tendency to blurt something out so reassurance will hopefully be able to comfort him. Yosuke watches him. Huh, he’s never seen that look on his face before. He looks contemplative, like a tactician figuring out out his next move.

“So you’re Sakamoto Ryuji, right? Akira’s boyfriend?” he asks. Akira hears Ryuji gulp and grips his hands tighter.

“Y-Yeah.” Yosuke smiles at him. If Akira were Yusuke, he would describe his smile like the sun peeking over the horizon, bringing light and warmth into the café and granting all the onlookers with a gorgeous sight. But Akira’s not Yusuke and instead thinks Souji’s marrying the physical manifestation of the sun oh shit.

“Don’t worry, I’m not here to bite, just to talk about some things.” Everyone except Akira and Futaba freeze. “Wait shit, that wasn’t the right thing to say. Now you guys are probably thinking that I’ll arrest you or report you to the police or something.” Should stop Yosuke from sticking his foot farther into his mouth and calm his friends down from impending hysteria? Nah. His friends are smart. They know he’s bluffing.

Right? They do know… right?

There was probably some higher thing watching all of them and taking pity on Akira’s (ridiculous and highly paranoid) team because the bell to the door jingles at just the right time. Everyone jolts in surprise. There usually isn’t that many customers at this hour…

“Hooooh, I finally made it!” _Hold the fucking phone_. The woman at the door sighs and laughs while the door closes. She comes in dressed to the nines in brand name clothes; sneakers, sunglasses, bag, brand name everything and Akira suddenly knows who this is because she’s giving him the shit eating grin he’s known since he was a kid. Yosuke turns around and Akira’s not paying attention anymore because what the fuck? Ann’s become a living squeeing time bomb and Ryuji seems to have forgotten about his social anxiety and instead looks like his head is about to fall off his body from how fast he was looking from Akira to the two by the door—did Yosuke walk to her? Wow he didn’t even notice. Even Makoto and Yusuke have been shocked into silence because there is no way a person who doesn’t live under a rock doesn’t know who that woman is.

“Is that—holy shit is that—” Oh, looks like Futaba’s broken too. Swell.

“Took you long enough,” Yosuke snips at her. She pouts, fiddling with a piece of her hair.

“Shush! I had to outrun my bodyguards so I could get here alone! Luckily, the guys I had today know I can take care of myself, so we’ll be alone as long as we want to.” She winks at him and he sighs in return.

“Just make sure you get back to your bodyguards when you can, alright? I don’t think Partner and I can deal with several hundred calls from your manager again.”

“That was one time!”

“Uh uh, I think you mean ten times.”

“Rise-senpai,” Akira cuts them off and oops, should he have dropped that bombshell that abruptly? Ann is losing her shit behind him and he can’t even see her. “What are you doing here?”

Ten seconds later, Kujikawa Rise herself was squeezing him like a stuffed animal. His poor lungs are going to die at this rate. “Seeing you of course! Can’t have the little darling of Inaba be left by his lonesome, can’t we?”

“Uh, you kinda did—“

“And we will fix that mistake!” Rise hollers and Akira had been pulled down to her height so now he’s awkwardly bending his legs. Damn his height sometimes. “You know we had to keep a down-low after all. Me, an idol, Souji-senpai, a history teacher, Minato-senpai—you know what, does he and Ryoji-senpai even have jobs? I’ll have to ask.”

Akira doesn’t really know how to reply to that so he just makes a garbled noise. Wow, the Phantom Thieves are just shellshocked right now. Man, he wished he had his camera on him. “Wait, what’s the big deal?” Morgana asks, his tail flicking from side to side. “Who is she?”

Oh Mona, you poor, poor soul. Ryuji and Ann almost immediately round on him and Akira’s starting to feel really bad for the cat. “You don’t know her? That’s Risette, only the biggest idol sensation in years after she came back from her break!” Ann exclaims.

“She’s been in a ton of movies and her tours like, the biggest thing around!” Ryuji continues and the two of them have probably forgotten that Risette herself is standing there, watching them with amusement.

“Please don’t break my friends, Rise-senpai,” Akira pleads to her quietly. Yosuke snorts and Rise makes a sound that sounds like a snort but is too pretty to be a snort because idols.

“Your friends are already broken, Kicchan,” she responds to him equally as quietly and thank god for that, no one needs to know his childhood nickname! She winks at him. “Mission accomplished.”

“You’re evil,” he gasps, scandalized. “Both of you.” The masterminds smirk and fist bump each other. Evil.

A hand lands on his shoulder. Akira turns around to see Yusuke standing there and silently holding out his odd new plushie. Ann and Ryuji are still having meltdowns at this point and Makoto and Futaba are just excited to be in Risette’s presence, but it looks like Yusuke’s recovered. He’s never been one for mainstream hits like Risette anyway. “Akira, is if this is all we’re expecting should we…” He jerks his head to the stairs and Akira remembers there’s business to attend to.

“Ah right, come on guys,” he glances at Rise and Yosuke. They’re looking at his new plush with surprise. Huh. “Let’s continue talking upstairs.”

* * *

([Persona 5: My Homie](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CORowSvp-k))

“Dude, I can’t believe you know Risette!” Ryuji sounds like an overexcited child about to get his birthday presents early, but it’s not like he can blame him. Rise giggles. All of them are scattered around his room like leaves on a fall day. Yosuke’s by his trinkets and goods on his desk and is touching the small bombs he never uses while Rise has taken up space on his bed. Everyone else is gathered around his old TV with their adhesives and scissors. Akira hums and pulls out a can from Ann’s plastic bag of treasures.

“Fake parents, dude. Fake parents.” He examines the can in his hands before looking up at his senpais. “So, I’ve got a ton of questions because there is literally only one way I can say my feelings and that is what the fuck.”

“Mood,” half the crowd remarks. The two adults (Akira can’t believe two of the insane people he grew up with are adults sometimes) look at each other briefly. “Let me start with this.” Akira points to Futaba, who was trying to put rubber cement on two bottles, then to Yosuke. “How do you two know each other?” he grins.

“I told you I used to work for Sojiro, right? Well, there was this woman, Isshiki Wakaba, who used to come in often,” he explains. He crosses his arms and tilts back on the chair. As much as Akira wants to warn him not to because that thing is about the same age as the fucking universe, the giddy part of his mind wants him to fall.

“She used to come in with a little girl and sometimes, when she was too busy, she would leave her daughter with me. So yeah, I used to babysit Futaba when she was little. She was one of the nicest women I had ever met. I had been invited to her funeral, but I wasn’t able to go.” He looks at Futaba. “I’m sorry for what happened, Futaba.” He stops. Stares at the floor. “I don’t believe she committed suicide. Do you—"

“She got murdered,” she murmurs, tightening her hands around the bottles but continues her work. “By a bunch of rotten people who used her research for their own selfish gain.” Makoto and Ann move closer to her but don’t stop their fiddling and Yusuke glances to her. There’s veiled concern in his eyes when he does. Ryuji’s hands rip pieces of masking tape viciously.

Yosuke says nothing else and Akira doesn’t think he can. There nothing else to be said. Wordlessly, he begins carving windows into the can he has in his hands. Yusuke passes him the bottle he’s carrying—a plastic iced tea bottle with the wrapping pulled off—and he takes it.

“Well, what about your nickname?” Ann asks as she clearly tries to get the mood back up. Bless her heart. “Futaba called you Kerosuke earlier! Where did that come from?”

“Kerosuke?” Rise starts smirking and here comes the onset of Akira’s favorite part of his senpai. Yosuke’s face is trying it’s best to become a tomato and he’s impressed that a face can actually turn that red without exploding. Heads can’t be vegetables, Yosuke. Haven’t you learned that already? Futaba lights up again and she tries claps her hands together, but ends up smacking her two water bottles together and making them stick in the wrong places.

“Yosuke used to tell me stories about this frog ninja when I was little!” she explains while Makoto and Yusuke try to pry her bottles apart, “So I nicknamed him after that.” Rise is wheezing and keeling over at this point. Yosuke blubbers behind his hands, probably thinking about how space is nice this time of year for a good trip to. Akira would’ve have said something like “it’s just a nickname”, but he knows Rise is a spawn of satan and she’ll use that against him, so he says nothing. He does take a few picture though. Blackmail. Delicious. Futaba’s bottles fly apart and one smack into the TV. The other one nails Ryuji in the nose.

“I can’t believe you told her stories about Jiraiya,” Rise cackles and Yosuke looks ready to fling the screwdriver on his desk at her. Ryuji actually flings his water bottle in the air with a yowl. Yusuke catches it cooly; as you do, Kitagawa.

“Sh-shut up! It’s not like I had any other superhero stories at the time! She was a little kid, what else would I have told her about?!” Ann makes a noise and Akira turns to see a tower of cans, 5 tiers of Arginade and Dr. Salt NEO with a small toothpick at the top on the ground in front of her, Yusuke examining it closely. That deserves a whistle of approval.

“I don’t know, Futaba looks like the kind of girl that would be interested in your music career~.” Ryuji rubs his nose while mumbling about being a butt monkey and Akira can’t help but reach over and kiss his nose. He grins. Ryuji flushes. Critical hit.

“Like I had one when I was 18.”

“Jiraiya?” Futaba cuts both of them off.  “Who’s that? You never mentioned names.” She glues another tier of bottles on top of each other—what is she doing?

Yosuke smiles. “You can’t tell? Jiraiya’s my Persona.” _Wait what?_  “Well, he was my Persona, then he ‘evolved’ into Susano-o before ‘evolving’ again to the one I have now, Takehaya Susano-o.”

Akira gapes. Ryuji’s sputtering next to him and Futaba stops what she’s doing and stares at the air like her entire life is a lie. “Wait, you’re a Persona user?” he bleats. Yosuke raises an eyebrow and his chair thunks back to its normal position. Akira laments just a little, but shock has outweighed the little demon inside that was looking for a chance to attain blackmail.

“It seriously wasn’t obvious? How much did Partner and Minato-senpai tell you?” Yosuke asks while he sits normally on the chair. Akira hums.

“They said that there were Persona users in the Shadow Operatives, but they never said who. We concluded that a good bunch of them were Persona users, but we never thought that you would have one.” Yosuke doesn’t seem to be the rebellious type. He might have been when he was younger, but he wasn’t right now. Though it's not like Akira would remember. Rise bounces on his bed and trills: “I have one too, you know!”

Ryuji drops everything he’s working on, his jaw dropping with them. Ann accidently knocks Futaba’s bottle building over when her arms suddenly decide to have minds of their own and flails. Futaba and Yusuke dive down to catch them before they break and barely manage to catch them in time. Metaverse training’s finally coming in handy in the weirdest of times! “Really? You, Risette?!” Ann blurts. Rise laughs.

“Yes! My Persona is Kouzeon, but before she changed forms I had one named Kanzeon and before her I had Himiko.” Akira scooches around Ann the nutcracker and takes her tower—wow, is this supposed to be the Tower of Pisa?—from Yusuke. Ryuji sputters something that definitely isn’t Japanese. “Why do you sound so surprised?”

“We honestly can’t see you as the rebellious type, Kujikawa-san,” Makoto replies. Her own creation sits on her lap, a random 2 liter bottle opened up from its side with a makeshift door. A bottle cap hangs from the top like a bell.

“Rebellion? What does that have to do with Personas?” Rise questions and Akira can’t answer. _I don’t think anyone can except Morgana._ He immediately looks at said-not-cat-but-totally-a-cat. Well that’s a problem.

“Can you guys understand Morgana?” he wonders. Yusuke tells him to tilt Ann’s tower over a little more and he tapes it down on his TV with a strip of tape on one side and a ball of tape on the other. Yosuke makes a confused sound.

“No? What, is the cat supposed to do something?” Morgana visibly bristles at being called a cat so Akira puts his hand on his head in case he wants to commit homicide. Morgana bats his hand away and he stands.

“I guess it’s time to put that thing Futaba made to good use,” he pipes. Morgana touches the small screen attached to his collar—now that he can see it, it does look like a smart watch of some sort—with his paw and it lights up. “Akira, add me to a chat between the three of us.”

 _What an interesting turn of events this is_ , he muses while taking out his phone. He does as told. Phones ping from the two closest to the bed and they pull their phones out. Morgana begins speaking.

 **Morgana** : Can you read this?

“Holy shit is this the cat?” Yosuke wonders. Morgana purrs.  
  
**Morgana** : For the record, I’m not a cat, I’m a human stuck in cat form!  
  
It’s kind of disorienting hear Morgana saying it then it popping up in a text message, but it’s equally as funny when Yosuke and Rise looks like their phones are made of gold twine. Ryuji’s snickering behind him.

 **Morgana** : All of the Phantom Thieves awakened by actively rebelling against a stronger power or a fate they did not want. Their awakenings were fueled by the power of their rebellion and their Personas reflect this rebellion they hold.

“So Persona awakenings do differ between groups,” Yosuke mumbles.

“What do you mean?” Ann asks while Akira takes Makoto’s small building.

“For us, we had to face our Shadows and accept us for what we were. Since our Shadows were the parts of ourselves that we didn’t want to reveal, we had to accept the truth of the matter.” It sounds a lot less violent than what they had to go through.

“What about the other members of the Shadow Operatives?” Makoto asks.

Rise shakes her head. “We can’t tell you. It’s not our place to.”

“There’s a lot you don’t know about the Shadow Operatives,” Yosuke add his two yen in, “That why Mitsuru wants to meet with all of you guys in a few days. Of course you would know already.”

“Are you going to tell us anything? You’re here anyway,” Ryuji reckons while handing a pair of scissors to Futaba.

“The SO and SEES is Mitsuru’s responsibility. Why we’re here is more on a personal mission. We,” Yosuke moves next to Rise and sits down. “have questions for you.”

“We’ll answer to the best of our ability.” Makoto nods.

([Persona 5: Disquiet/Restlessness](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VMCmDfSbFs))

“Of course. First question: what is the cause of the Phantom Thieves?” Gone is the usual ditzy like expression people usually see Rise with. Her expression is now the same as Yosuke’s: calculating, hard, and overflowing with experience in their field.

 _Ah right_ , Akira thinks, _if they had faced Shadows, they must have put their lives on the line too._

“We want to make adults who do things for their own selfish gain pay for what they’ve done. All of our targets have put people’s livelihoods and actual lives on the line or they have suffered so much that they need to be saved from their distorted desires,” Makoto answers first. No one looks at Futaba, but everyone knows who she’s talking about. Akira hopes Yosuke doesn’t figure out what Futaba was like the first time they met her.

Yosuke and Rise hum together and they look at each other again. “So, if what I’m getting at is right, then the part of the unconsciousness your group is focusing on is desire, specifically distorted desires,” Yosuke surmises. Everyone nods.

“Akira had said that there were groups that came before us. When you were active, did you have to face something different?” Yusuke inquires.

“Yeah.” Yosuke crosses his arms. “There were two groups before you. One was the one Rise and I were in called the Investigation Team. Our goal was to uncover the truth behind the kidnappings that were happening in Inaba.”

“Kidnappings?” Ann sounds perturbed. “We had heard of murders, but not about kidnappings.”

“For a reason.” Rise fiddles with the blankets of Akira’s bed. “The murders and the kidnappings were all related to the thing we all know and love: the Metaverse.”

“We didn’t know it was called the Metaverse at the time, but Partner’s long nosed friend had given him the run down.” _Igor?_ Akira wonders. “The Midnight Channel was the pocket of the Metaverse that represented truth. A goddess had taken it over and shrouded the place with her fog, making the shadows in there extremely volatile. What do you guys have to deal with?”

 **Morgana** : For us, it’s Mementos, a pocket centralized on desires. People with distorted desires can manifest in Mementos and can have their desires dealt with, but people with strong enough distortions create Palaces, pockets within Mementos where a distorted desire takes physical form.  
  
“All of our targets, Kamoshida, Madarame, and Kaneshiro,” as well as Futaba, but Akira leaves it out, “all had Palaces we had to infiltrate and sneak through in order to ‘steal’ their distorted desire.”  
  
“So how did you, what was that thing... steal their hearts? Was the calling card a necessary step?”  
  
“Sending the calling card is crucial to the whole operation.” Yusuke had taken this question. “Once we figured out a pathway to the Treasure, which was their distorted desire, we had to return out to the real world and send the card. Calling cards make the targets aware there was a treasure that was going to be stolen, so that way, the Treasure actually physically manifests.”  
  
“After we steal the Treasure, we just wait for the change of heart. They’re stubborn shits, but so far, we haven’t got a single failure,” finishes Ryuji.

A silence settles in between them all. Akira turns back to his TV and tapes down Makoto’s building while Ryuji reaches over and plops random cans around them. It stays silent for a while, but is quickly broken by Futaba. “Finished!” she interjects and what the hell?

“What the fuck, Futaba?” Ryuji blurts out as she carries a rocket—a fucking rocket!—made of rows of 12 oz. soda bottles arranged in a circle and a circle of soda cans serving as its foundation. Futaba huffs out of her nose.

“Makoto helped me with some of arrangements, but the designs all on my own!” she boasts.

“This is exquisite for a model made of recyclable items. Come, I know exactly where to place it.” Yusuke guides Futaba to a place a couple of centimeters between the Leaning Tower of Dr. Salt Arginade—hell yeah that’s what it’s getting called now—and the other creations before he tapes it down.

Their masterpiece is... strange but Akira feels more accomplished than he ever had at school.

“I don’t mean to interrupt but,” Rise raises her voice so that everyone can hear her. “But there’s one more question. Akira,” Rise looks desperately at him. “Please don’t hate me for asking this.” She pauses. The bustling around the TV stops. “Do you believe what you’re doing is right?”

Akira had been expecting this question. Ever since the Phantom Thieves were formed, he waited for when someone who question his morals, question the beliefs and morals of the group who had formed to rid the world of society’s menaces. But to get it from one of the people who he grew up with was…

([Persona 5: Swear To My Bones](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTQlTOjabH8))

“We believe in what we do.” Ann stands up. Her eyes are azure diamonds as she stares down the two sitting, “For the system that society has established has pushed those who grow up in rebellion of the system aside.”

“We don’t know how you lived back in Inaba.” Makoto stands as well. “But here? No one cares about the kids who don’t want to follow what other people want, who want to live by their own merits instead of following other people around like dogs looking for food.”

“All of us have suffered under the indiscriminate and cruel hands of those who have power over us.” When Yusuke stands, he towers over everyone and his normally blank gaze veils a cold biting fury. “What we do is for all of those who have been forced to comply with the heretics, the perverts, the abusers, the _sinners_.”

“Mom died because of corrupted adults,” Akira hears the faint sob in Futaba’s voice, but she’s pushing past it, glaring determinedly at Yosuke and Rise, “Ann, Ryuji, and Makoto got hurt by people like that. Yusuke grew up alone and isolated because of people like that. Akira…” He could feel her eyes on him. “...he got punished by people like that.”

“So we don’t give a damn about the corrupted adults,” Ryuji spits. “We’ve been treated like the shit under some asshole’s foot for years and we don’t want other people, other kids, to face the world under these kind of people. So we’ll change those fucker’s hearts and make them surrender their distorted desires no matter the cost.”

“Our methods are unorthodox,” Akira’s figure blooms in front of all the rest and like clockwork, his team flanks both of his sides as much as possible, “and what we do might be illegal, but for the sake of changing the world from this wretched system of corruption and deceit, we will do what we must to fight in rebellion against it.” His gaze turns cold. There is a quick twist of regret in his gut, but he ignores it. They asked for this after all. “The Phantom Thieves of Hearts strive to change society by changing the hearts of those who poison it with their selfishness and lies and make it better for those who fall under the feet of the privileged, of the accepted. They deserve it, to have something they should have from the beginning.” Akira grits his teeth. “If you want to convince me or any of us to stop, we won’t and we highly advise you to keep out of our business.”

A part of his mind wants him to apologize for everything he said. They’re his family, the people he grew up with. He shouldn’t have to treat them like the other rotten adults in the world.

But they had lied to him. All of them. Did he truly know those who he contacted, the faces behind the screen who used to smile at him and reassure him? What other kinds of secrets did they hide under this façade of theirs?

The silence is suffocating. Both of their senpais stare at them long and hard. Weat starts forming along his back and he feels Futaba shift on her feet.

Then both of them smile.

([Persona 4: SMILE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GH1H7bdsWKo))

“Look at you,” Rise coos. Both of the stand up and suddenly Akira finds himself in the arms of his senpai. The ice breaks. Akira lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. Yosuke moves, but he doesn’t see him until he sees a small bit of copper poking at his periphery. The Phantom Thieves enact Donut formation around them and Akira can’t help but smile. “You’ve grown up without us. You’ve found yourself friends who are willing to fight for you until the very end.” She pulls back with a smile. “You remind me of the Investigation Team.”

“No kidding,” Yosuke snorts. He moves into Akira’s field of vision. “We were willing to go to hell and back for what we believed, consequences be damned. The truth of what had happened needed to be out there and we would do whatever we had to to make it a reality.” He looks up to the rest of the Phantom Thieves. “You Phantom Thieves have a firm belief in what you do. Rise and I were never going to stand a chance, huh?”

“These kids are too much like us anyway, ”she laughs. “Alright, you’ve convinced us both. The Phantom Thieves aren’t a bad group.” Everyone around them deflates in relief. A weight lifts off of Akira’s chest and he wheezes a slightly hysterical laugh. Had he really been that worried? Rise nods at Yosuke.

“You can say that you’ve got the rest of the IT on your side too,” he declares, “Partner would say the same thing, with or without hearing all of this. He’s always had a soft spot for you.” He smiles and it crinkles the corners of his eyes a little bit. “The meeting with the Shadow Operatives will happen four days from now. Make sure your schedule’s cleared of anything because chances are, you’ll be there for a long time.”

Futaba bounces over to Yosuke. “Will you be there too, Kerosuke?” she asks excitedly.

Rise snickers and Yosuke sticks his tongue out. “As part of the SO, we have to, but Mitsuru will probably do most of the talking.” He glances at Akira. “You know what I mean.” Hell yeah he knows. Mitsuru-senpai is probably the scariest lady he’s ever met, but damn can she do a mean lecture. Sometimes he wonders why Souji-senpai is the teacher and not her.

“Oh, and before I forget…” He trails off as he sticks his arm into his messenger bag. Yusuke and Ann gravitates back to the TV to fix some buildings while Ryuji haphazardly slings an arm around Akira’s waist. Yosuke makes a sound. “There they are!”

Akira stares at the golden bordered envelopes with each Phantom Thief’s name on them before he finds himself on the receiving end of the loudest sound in history.

“The wedding invites!” Ann squeals and did she fucking teleport because she suddenly appears in front of him, eyeing the invites like pieces of candy. Yosuke grins like the sun again—he can’t look at it or else he’ll get blind from the sheer happiness radiating off of it—and hands her her invite.

“Make sure you’re free on that date, alright? Can’t have any guests missing from the roster.”

“Alright then,” Akira says when Yosuke gives him his invite. His name is written in golden pen and perfect script. Wow. “Who’s going to be in the wedding? Can I see?” Rise bounds over to him, rummaging through her bag.

“Lucky for you, I have exactly what you’re asking for!” She pulls out a piece of paper and hands it to him while Futaba and Morgana marvel over the penmanship of their names on their invites and Yusuke examines each stroke of his name on his invite’s envelope. Akira unfolds the paper and reads the names on it. Seta Souji, Hanamura Yosuke, Satonaka Chie… everyone’s familiar… Wait. What?

“Why am _I_ your ring bearer?!”

 

**August 24, 2016 (Evening)**

**Shadow Operatives: Main**

**Hanamura** : phantomthieves1.mp3

 **Kujikawa** : phantomthieves2.mp3

 **Kirijo** : Thank you, Hanamura, Kujikawa.

 **Hanamura** : No problem, Mitsuru.

 **Kujikawa** : It was our pleasure, Mitsuru!  
**Kujikawa** : I have to say, Akira has grown up well away from us. His team is really close to him, not to mention overprotective. It’s like the second coming of the IT!

 **Iori** : Yeah, I have to give it to you there. Us SEES didn’t really get too close to each other.  
**Iori** : But hell, that was in the past! Now we’re as thick as thieves!

 **Takeba** : I hope that wasn’t intentional or I will fly back to Iwatodai and sock you in the nose.

 **Iori** : Christ, Yuka-tan! It was a joke!

 **Arisato** : It’s obvious that the Phantom Thieves are completely different from both the IT and SEES. What they’re dealing with is probably much closer to what we dealt with than what the IT handled.

 **Seta** : Philemon waited 8 years to come back and play his game again. There might have been something that forced his hand.

 **Kirijo** : You’re speaking about the absence of the Velvet Rooms, correct?

 **Arisato** : The doors in Inaba, Iwatodai, and the Midnight Channel are still missing the last time Ryoji and I checked. We still have our keys though, so they’re still around, just hidden from us.

 **Mochizuki** : Minato and I did some snooping around the part of the Sea of Souls that the Midnight Channel and found nothing out of the ordinary. The Great Seal is in perfectly good condition too!

 **Seta** : The Velvet Room attendants are also out of contact. It seems nothing can come in nor go out.

 **Arisato** : Except Akira.

 **Kirijo** : Exactly.  
**Kirijo** : Now that we have confirmed that Akira is the leader of the Phantom Thieves and not a different person, we’re cleared of any issues concerning the leader’s past. And with the recordings that Hanamura and Kujikawa have sent, we will be able to discern whether or not their actions are just.  
**Kirijo** : Objectively they aren’t. Changing there heart of someone seems to have an equivalent effect as brainwashing.

 **Hanamura** : Aaaaaand I’m going to stop you right there.  
**Hanamura** : Akira and his friends sounded like they went through hell to get to where they are now. These kids aren’t like us. They had the short end of the stick in life and this is their way of disagreeing with it.

 **Kujikawa** : Yosuke-senpai is right! They’re not going to change their minds, they’re too focused on their goal to do that.

 **Seta** : So they’re unaware of the potential consequences?

 **Hanamura** : Unaware or willingly ignoring it.

 **Kirijo** : Is that so?

 **Kujikawa** : Our recordings should give you the gist of it. We’re warning you now though; they’re not going to stop what they’re doing.

 **Hanamura** : They threatened us haha.  
**Hanamura** : They have their reasons. It’s not for us to say.

 **Kirijo** : You’re positive they won’t change their minds?

 **Hanamura** : Absolutely.

 **Kujikawa** : Definitely.

 **Kirijo** : Alright. Everyone, make sure you make it to the main building on time on the 28th.  
**Kirijo** : I feel there will be much to discuss.

 

**< No Name>**

**Kurusu Akira** : You’re actually going to come by? Sweet! When?

...

 **Kurusu Akira** : I won’t be at LeBlanc on the 28th because there’s something I have to do. It might be better this way though..

...

 **Kurusu Akira** : Pop in from time to time, alright? Honestly, evening would be better, but you can come up any time you want.

...

 **Kurusu Akira** : See you around!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all can see I'm trying to link Persona 5 to 3 and 4 and I really hope it's working.
> 
> Wanna shout at me about P3/4/5? Go visit my tumblr! My user name is smellie-cactus
> 
> I'm going to bed night.


	7. 119, we got gassed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bridge chapter of sorts. It's the 28th. That's all you need to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much, much shorter than chapter 6, but the next chapter is all about explanations and worldbuilding and so many headcanons to shove into your eye sockets that I wanted to make it separate. Aaaaaaand it's been a while since I posted, so here's proof I'm still around!!
> 
> Also gratuitous amount of references because this story is writing itself.

**August 28, 2016**

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : So that just happened

 **strawberry shortcake** : What happened?

 **yeet** : fuckin pancake man came by

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : to leblanc?! whatd he say

 **super fluffy** : Apparently Mako's sister recommended that he visit LeBlanc and lo and behold he appeared

 **yeet** : looks like hes a regular from now on

 **strawberry shortcake** : shit

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : does that mean we're fucked now

 **fists on wheels** : Not necessarily. As a detective, Akechi is probably has a busy schedule so he shouldn't be there everyday

 **Morganya** : akira and i could keep an eye on him whenever he comes by.  
**Morganya** : and futaba's got bugs in the cafe so she could alert us.

 **yeet** : what a smart cat u are

 **Morganya** : i'm not a cat!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : surejan.gif

 **yeet** : he also told his life story  
**yeet** : like  
**yeet** : did he want us to feel bad or

 **strawberry shortcake** : Life story?

 **super fluffy** : Basically our detective is an orphan with a shitty dad who abandoned him and his mom died

 **yeet** : id feel bad for him if he wasnt suspicious

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : he was probably goin for somethin like that huh

 **super fluffy** : You can never know with someone like Akechi  
**super fluffy** : He's  
**super fluffy** : A-skechy guy

 **strawberry shortcake** : sdbogahergjfesg

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : oigojgwoefuheid

 **Morganya** : onfnafbiqubfwajfoa

 **fist on wheels** : I was waiting for you to use that.

 **yeet** : how the hell do u even button mash mona there's no keyboard on ur watch

 **Morganya** : a magician never tells his secrets.

 **super fluffy** : Arcana confirmed

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : wh?

 **super fluffy** : Nothing

 **graphic design is my passion** : Where are we to meet? The location of the Shadow Operatives' base is unknown to us.

 **super fluffy** : Good question hold up

 **yeet** : okay yall theres something i need to ask  
**yeet** : whats your judgement on undertale

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : WHY

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : Alright senpais where're we gonna meet

 **eternal rest** : wait there for bowl cut to get you

 **Walking Spoon** : The hell, I haven't had a bowl cut in years.

 **eternal rest** : first impressions never fade glasses

 **Walking Spoon** : You have glasses.

 **eternal rest** : at least i look cool in them you look like a hippie

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Guys

 **Walking Spoon** : Tell me when your friends get here. I’ll go there once they’re all gathered.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : You could just meet us at Leblanc  
**Tiny Munchkin** : You probably already know where it is since Yosuke-senpai worked there and by the way why did no one tell me you knew Sojiro when I was coming here

 **eternal rest** : because we’re all shits that like messing with you unless it’s for something important

 **Walking Spoon** : And we didn’t consider you knowing important.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : The hell guys

 **Walking Spoon** : Knowing a band of Persona users left to their own devices, you better go back to your friends.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Oh fuck

 **eternal rest** : you better hope they didn’t recreate the infamous i sees it debacle

 **Walking Spoon** : We don’t speak of that, Minato.  
**Walking Spoon** : Not a word.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : OH FUCK BYE GUYS

 **eternal rest** : he dead

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : Y’ALL

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : FUCKFIN WHAT FUTABA

 **strawberry shortcake** : HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT

 **yeet** : the internet how else

 **fists on wheels** : NO SINS ON MY CHRISTIAN SURVER.

 **strawberry shortcake** : THIS IS NO CHRISTIAN SURVER CAUSE HALF OF US ARE GAY

 **Morganya** : you guys're scaring me.

 **graphic design is my passion** : The fright is well deserved. Undertail is a terrifying portion of the internet.

 **strawberry shortcake** : REVOKE YUSUKE AS PUREST BOY MORGANA IS PUREST BOY SAY AYE

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : AYE

 **fists on wheels** : AYE.

 **yeet** : yeet

 **Morganya** : sweet!

 **super fluffy** : Y'all are on some crazy shit since I just had the wildest backread  
**super fluffy** : And I'd like to add my pointers  
**super fluffy** : 1) Alphys is best girl 2) Sans isn't some Nintendo character the hell did you get that shit from and 3) Chara should totally have knives as weapons fuck y'all with your swords and rocket launchers

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : sorry but fuck that babe

 **super fluffy** : I've been betrayed how  
**super fluffy** : DARE you

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : *text kiss*

 **super fluffy** : Okay you're forgiven

 **Morganya** : gross.

 **fists on wheels** : Yusuke, how do you even know Undertale? You aren't exactly the gaming type.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : neither are you but look where we are now mako

 **fists on wheels** : Hush.

 **graphic design is my passion** : I may specialize in paintings and the like, but there are several students in the art department planning on doing game design. One of them had infiltrated the announcement room and shouted their misgivings as well as criticisms about the work before they got taken away by teachers.  
**graphic design is my passion** : It was enough to pique my interest in the matter.

 **yeet** : your school sounds lit sign me up

 **graphic design is my passion** : There is a technology division at Kosei; I feel like you might like it there, Futaba.

 **yeet** : sweet!

 **super fluffy** : :3c

 **strawberry shortcake** : :3c

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **graphic design is my passion** : Ah, the face has returned.

 **fist on wheels** : There is a time and place, Ryuji.

 **super fluffy** : Alright kids let's get down to business

 **strawberry shortcake** : To defeat the huns

 **super fluffy** : Did they send me daughters

 **yeet** : when i asked for male first born

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : the fucl

 **super fluffy** : Just get over here Souji-senpai wants everyone at leblanc so he can pick us up

* * *

 **graphic design is my passion** : I’m unsure if you’re aware, but there is an awfully suspicious car sitting by the road.  
**graphic design is my passion** : The man inside is staring at me.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : is it time to activate operation 6524

 **strawberry shortcake** : And what good would throwing pies with whip cream and oil inside them do?!

 **fists on wheels** : I think he means operation 6542

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah that one

 **yeet** : theres bats ready and waiting for yall at leblanc if akiras givin the go

 **super fluffy** : 6542 isn’t a go just yet

 **yeet** : damn

 **super fluffy** : Yusuke does the guy in the car have grey hair but looks nowhere near 50

 **graphic design is my passion** : While I can’t seem to see any wrinkles, he actually looks rather young.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Ah, he is waving at me.

 **super fluffy** : That’s our guy come on let’s meet up with him

 **yeet** : so no bats

 **super fluffy** : No bats

* * *

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : OKAY SHITS WEVE GOT SHIT TO GO OVER  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : PROSPERITY OR SOME SHIT CAUSE THIS NEEDS TO GO IN THE MOTHAFUKIN YEARBOOKS  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : WE SHOULD HAVE BROUGHT THE BATS

 **yeet** : heres a voice recording i managed to get  
**yeet** : its short but not too useless

( _Static. Futaba taps the microphone of her phone and says, “We’re meeting up with the target. Akira’s looking more chipper than usual and— oh, grey haired dude got tackle hugged.” There is the faint sound of a body hitting concrete._

_“My favorite senpai~!” Akira’s voice is barely audible but his voice grows louder as Futaba, presumably, walks closer. “How’ve you been?”_

_“There are exactly five people that will stab me in the back if we don’t get going, but to answer your question, I’m fine.” Souji Seta’s voice is deep, lower than Akira’s, around Yusuke’s level. Something slides open; a car door. “Come on guys. I’ll answer questions inside.”_

_Shuffling is heard. Ryuji mumbles about the tight fit and Morgana snaps at him to stop complaining. Something hits the phone with a loud bap; Yusuke mumbles apologies while Futaba grumbles under her breath. The sounds become clearer suddenly and the talks about around the phone are louder now._

_The engine of the car roars to life. It reduces to a quiet hum._

_“You’ll answer questions, huh?” Akira sounds sour and sassy. “Because booooooy, do I have questions for you!”_

_“Before that,” Makoto speaks, “I would like a proper introduction. We don’t know who you are like Akira does.”_

_“Of course.” The sound of people outside increase. “As Akira has already told you, I am Seta Souji, a member of the Shadow Operatives and one of his quote-unquote, fake parents.”_

_“I know there’s more your hiding, senpai.”_

_“You already asked many questions to Yosuke and Rise. There’s nothing else I can really tell you that they have.”_

_“What the_ — _how did you know?!”_

_“Did you honestly think that Yosuke and Rise would keep quiet about a meeting with the Phantom Thieves? They recorded your conversation.”_

_“Dammit_ — _"_

 _“So did they visit just to interrogate us?!” Ryuji shouts and the car jostles. The microphone gets hit a few times. “Shit_ — _”_

_“While Yosuke and Rise did go visit you on their own volition, Mitsuru had asked them to ask you specific things. Many of the questions they asked were per Mitsuru’s request, but they did ask a few more out of curiosity.”_

_“Is there anything else you can tell us, senpai? Anything?”_

_“There is one thing… ah, but that’ll have to wait. Akira, tell your navigator to turn off her recording.”_

_“Wha_ — _"_

 _“How did_ — _”_

 _“Fuck_ — _”_

_Futaba gasps and the microphone is muffled almost completely. The microphone is hit by something repeatedly. The recording ends.)_

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : AFTER THAT HAPPENED THE FUCKIN CAR GETS FLOODED BY GAS  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : FUKCIN  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : GAS

 **yeet** : makoto almost jumped into the front seat to deck the guy but whatever was in the gas did quick work and we all knocked out probably

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ITS NOW BEEN WHO KNOWS HOW LONG SINCE ME AND FUTABA WOKE UP AND GOT OUR PHONES ON HAND AND ARE NOW IN SOME FANCY ROOM

 **yeet** : this is mansion grade yall  
**yeet** : you know those fancy mansion rooms with the plush chairs with fancy patterns and a mirror above a vanity and velvet pillows and mahogany dressers or something  
**yeet** : ‘s that kinda fancy

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : how can u tell somethings mahogany

 **yeet** : any shiny piece of wood furniture is mahogany to me

 **super fluffy** : ddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

“Akira!” The world is hazy as shit as Akira tries to regain consciousness. He groans. His fumbling fingers find a firm grip on his phone; footsteps stomps over to him. Ryuji’s voice and face are a welcome way to wake up from goddamn gas inhalation.

“Ryu… Taba…” Akira shakes his head. Nausea creeps up his esophagus and he does all he can to keep it together and more importantly, inside. The bile rushes back down. Ryuji stares at him, Futaba typing on her phone at light speed.

“Well hey there,” Ryuji grins at him, “Nice to see you up.” Futaba smacks his arm.

“Don’t start the sappy shit, Ryuji, there’s PTs to wake up and cats to step on.” Oh, and Ryuji’s eyes just become the epitome of mischievousness nearly on Akira’s own level. Had he been more coherent, he would have stopped the potential bodily harm on the team cat, but Akira neither cares nor is thinking about Morgana at the moment, so he sits there are Ryuji saunters up to the slumbering cat. Futaba taps his leg. Akira looks at her. “Whatever was in that stuff is potent as heck,” she comments. She reaches over and pokes his nose. He blinks. “Ryuji and I’ve been up for a while. Just sit here for a bit and breathe it out of your system. It should be gone soon.”

Akira sits there on the soft couch, watching as Futaba walks over to Yusuke, who is casually braced on a different couch with his legs in the air and halfway off the couch, and pulls his ear. Morgana yowls nearby when Ryuji pulled on his tail. Both of them tumble off the couch into heaps on the rug, Yusuke mumbling into the floor.

“Oh god, what hit me…” Oh, there was an occupant on this couch already. Makoto blinks from her definitely comfortable sitting position (why where the girls put down so properly?!) and she groans. Akira glances at her with a grin.

“Heya.” Ryuji wanders over to Ann and blows into her ear. Yusuke shakes his head and tries to stand, but falls back against the couch instead.

“Heya yourself, Leader.” Ann sucker punches Ryuji in the gut as Yusuke makes himself comfortable on the couch. Futaba sits next to him, mumbling.

“You feeling alright?” Ryuji guffaws and falls to the ground. Ann’s disoriented. Hm, doesn’t look like she realized what she did just yet.

“If the word for feeling alright is synonymous to feeling like shit, then yes, I’m alright.” Morgana cackles before Ryuji tries to sweep him off the ground. The cat dashes over to Futaba and Yusuke, who seem to be making small talk. Cute.

“Cool. Futaba says whatever we inhaled should be gone in a few. I think she and Ryuji put a log of what happened in the car on the Gay Thieving chat.” Ann finally realizes what she did and starts apologizing, but Ryuji brushes it off and offers his hand to pull Ann up.

“Why did you have to name it that?” They go to the pair of swivel chairs near the two couches and start spinning around on them. Akira grins.

“Duh, because we’re gay and thieves. I thought you were supposed to be smart, Miss Student Council President.” Makoto grimaces at him (shit she’s frightening) and opens her mouth to say something but—

“Would you look at that! Everyone’s already awake!” All movement and speech stop. _Is that who I think it is?_ “Wow, you all are bear-y magnificent kids!” Akira goes stone cold. _Oh yeah, that’s_ exactly _who I think it is._

The door nearby (presumably it was locked, because Futaba and Ryuji would actually check if they were locked in, right? Right?!) opens slowly. Akira’s heart beats rapidly in his chest as his palms start to sweat. He doesn’t want to give any of his friends heart attacks this early on! A talking cat they could all deal with, since cats are alive in the first place, but if he comes sauntering in in his red, blue, and white bear suit he swears he’s gonna—

“Hello!” A tall blond haired man stands at the entrance. Akira immediately feels all the anxiety flood out of him and he sighs. Good. The man at the door glides to them with a grace he was well known for and holy shit, what is he wearing?!

“Teddie, is that you?!” Teddie No-Last-Name-Ever pouts at him and wow, isn’t that expression completely different from what he’s wearing. Instead of his usually frilly white button up, red flower, and dark trousers combo, he looks ready to go on missions and kick the ass of every criminal in the universe. The white polo, black tie, and the suit jacket that looks like it’s made of steel or some kind of metal looks completely out of place on the excited bear he’s come to know. The black and red visor on his head makes his blond hair and blue eyes stick out even more. Teddie grins.

“Heck yeah it is! Aki’s got himself in quite the pickle this time!” he skips up to them (wow next time don’t do that in that outfit please Teddie) and he bows at them. “My name is Teddie. It’s bear-y nice to meet you.” His voice lowers into something dangerous and… sultry. A chill goes down everyone’s spines.  “So these are the elusive Phantom Thieves. You've been giving the police department a bear of a headache, you know.”

“Teddie—” Shit, he should have said that! Akira takes a quick sweep of his comrades and all of them look ready to fight. Futaba even has a death grip on her phone, her preferred weapon of mass destruction. Teddie twirls around on the ball of his foot and shrugs, like he isn’t bothered that there are seven pairs of lasers affixed on his head.

“Well, Sensei took too long to get here, so there’s no more time for more introductions! Come on, follow me.” He glances at the group. Akira suddenly feels like he’s staring down a Shadow. _But that’s impossible._ “The others await.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 8's gonna be long.


	8. press a for mind fuckery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing where we left off, the PT are meeting the heads of the SO.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all this chapter killed me. I was having a ton of trouble getting the explanations down because I had never actually played P3 and P4, so everything is coming from the wiki. Also because nO ONE'S VOICES WANTED TO COOPERATE SO IF ANYONE SOUNDS A BIT AWKWARD OR OOC IT'S BECAUSE THIS CHAPTER WAS BEATING ME OVER THE HEAD WITH HECKETH THEES.
> 
> Apologies that it ends rather abruptly. And I missed a lot of stuff about background info, so this is just my interpretation of the SO, alright guys?
> 
> Enjoy!

**August 28, 2016**

“We don’t have all day, ya know.” Teddie gives them a sidelong glance, smiling innocently. He waves his hand forward, gesturing them to follow. “The halls of the base are bear-y long. It won’t do if you get lost.”

“Where are you taking us?” The Thieves stand once Akira pushes himself on his feet, his question floating off his lips. His eyes narrow. The man smiles even brighter.

“The meeting room of course.” Without another word, long strides separate the Phantom Thieves from their guide. Sharing glances, they all scramble to catch up to him as Akira moves in front of the team.

The outside of the room is nowhere like the inside. The walls are made of metal. Plates of metal connected by small screws line the walls with no visible windows. The floor and ceiling look metalic as well, but the floor seems to be covered with something so that their footsteps wouldn’t echo in the base’s winding halls. What kind of person has a room made of vintage furniture reside in a building like this?

They walk with bated breath, unwilling to speak as they travel. The air feels heavy, as if the molecules themselves were made of molasses. Teddie guides them effortlessly through the halls of the Shadow Operatives base. Akira expects him to start talking, but not a peep comes out of him. He resists a shiver. The air is cold. It’s unnerving.

They enter a hall with doors lining the walls, parallel to each other. Yusuke and Futaba warily watch for intruders as Makoto’s fists tighten at her sides. Should things go to shit, they wouldn’t be able to figure out an adequate escape route. None of the doors were marked. They were essentially trapped.

A click resounds through the hall. One of the doors, white with a metal knob, had opened as they pass. Yusuke sighs something low under his breath. The door was far enough back that he couldn’t catch it in his periphery. Akira resists the urge to turn around and look, but claws digging into his pants and up his shirt reveal Morgana bounding onto his shoulder. All eyes flicker to the black cat. They say nothing, but all of them know what Morgana is up to. He’s watching their backs, literally.

“The person who came out of the door is following us,” he whispers. Hopefully Teddie can only hear meows instead of words, “and they’re in the same uniform as Teddie.” He can’t tell the gender at a glance. It might be Naoto-senpai. “They’re wearing a hat, but I think I see blue hair.” Definitely Naoto-senpai. Her footsteps don’t sound rushed to get pass them and are instead going at the same pace as them. Was she keen on watching Teddie’s back? Most likely.

Naoto remains silent behind the Phantom Thieves even as they weave around doors and up staircases. When Akira manages to glance to the back up a staircase, yep, that’s Detective Prince Shirogane Naoto in the flesh. Shit.

A few minutes into traversing another floor, another door opens and another pair of footsteps join Naoto’s. Futaba gasps. Morgana yowls and curls his tail around Akira’s neck.

“Oooh no, there is no way that guy is one of the Shadow Operatives or we’re totally screwed.” Teddie leads them into a huge elevator as Akira nudges Morgana with his head. _What’s wrong? Who is it?_ He momentarily laments on how much it sucks that Morgana can’t read minds before he and the others in the group turn around. Akira chokes on air.

“A-Akihiko-senpai!” he sputters and holy crap they are screwed. “And Naoto-senpai!” he adds just in case. Both Sanada Akihiko and Shirogane Naoto are exactly as he remembers them, just decked in black, grey, and white uniforms with black and red visors on their heads and capable of instilling the fear of god in onlookers with just their presence. Oh, like now, for instance!

“Kurusu Akira, our local headache,” Akihiko says, but he doesn’t sound annoyed, just affectionate. “‘S been a while, kid. Can’t believe we’re seeing you again like this.” Naoto says nothing, pushing a button on the massive selection of floors. The Phantom Thieves are in no condition to face off a fully built man and Naoto, who can kick ass despite being shorter than everyone here except Futaba. Mentally going over his options, Akira smiles at them. He pulls on Arsene just enough that some of his Joker persona bleeds through.

“Well, better now that you deal with me now than later, am I right?” he asks coyly with a razor sharp smile. Naoto watches him from under her hat. Neither she nor Akihiko look amused.

“That guy looks like the real deal,” Morgana mutters, “Watch out for him. Him and the smaller one.” He pats Akira’s shoulder with a paw. “Are these the kind of people the Shadow Operatives have? Yosuke and Rise didn’t look that special when they visited…” Akira mentally snorts. Yeah right. Yosuke and Rise were two of the craftiest people he’s ever known and he knows _a lot_ of people.

“Silly neko-chan! Rise-chan and Yosuke can be really scary when they want to be!” Teddie whistles behind them. Half of the Thieves jolt and instinctively fall into their defense stances. Akira whirls his head to the side and tuts. Like clockwork, they relax as much as they can at that, but Makoto still has the eyes of someone who could pass for a mafia member. Akira meet Teddie’s eyes and… isn’t he looking downright mischievous today.

“You can understand Morgana?” he inquires. He smiles at him, but it’s neither kind nor bubbly. It’s lethal. The air suddenly gets colder.

“But of course. I’m bear-y different from you, after all,” he remarks before winking. Well, that didn’t make him feel any better. Teddie’s smile sharpens. The elevator dings.

Akira faces forward while stuffing his hands into his pockets. Akihiko and Naoto turn sideways and Naoto sweeps her hand in front of her. “Guests first,” she says quietly. Akira glances at his Thieves, finding their faces hard set, as if they were going to face a Palace owner in the Metaverse.

He lets out a short whistle and suddenly Ann and Ryuji flank him on both sides. Yusuke and Futaba stand behind the two blonds as their advisor stand directly behind their leader. Akira grimaces. If the three Shadow Operatives notice anything, he gives them no acknowledgement. This was no time to be fooling around.

_Here goes._

The elevator door opens to one long long hallway with members of the Shadow Operatives lining in front of both walls.

Akira’s stomach churns with unease, but he takes the initiative and begins to walk forward. While this isn’t the Metaverse, he takes tabs on how everyone is doing with side glances. _Everyone needs to keep their cool, even though this is definitely more terrifying than fighting Shadows_.

His eyes flicker back and forth to the members lined along the walls. Many of them are in lab coats, men and women alike watching the Phantom Thieves as they pass them like hawks out for a meal. But as the group draws closer to the one door at the end of the hallway, the lab coats filter into the black and grey uniforms of the three members escorting them. Guess what? Akira recognizes each and every one of them.

 _There’s Chie-sensei, Fuuka-senpai, Junpei-senpai… even Ken-senpai?_ Matching every face to a name as they pass, they stand there, immobile, but always meet Akira’s eyes. Dead serious eyes. He would laugh in disbelief if he weren’t high strung and alert of the very possible fact that every one of these members could take him and his team down.

The other Thieves maintain their guarded looks, but can’t help but veil awe behind their façades. These were the people who Akira grew up with and who took care of him while he was Inaba. They were secret agents of an organization aiming to fight Shadows and if that wasn’t kick ass awesome, then Ryuji’s hair wasn’t bleach blond!

 _“_ Focus.” The small snap of their leader throws off any reverie or daydreams the others had. Ryuji snarls at himself, but doesn’t do anything more.

After an agonizingly long time, the group makes it to the doors. Two men stand in front of the door, decked in the same outfits as the others; One has short with blue hair lazily draped over one eye. The other has grey hair meticulously arranged in bangs that sweeps off to the side. Arisato Minato and Seta Souji. Next to them, standing at the corner of the door is a man with slicked back black hair and a yellow scarf and a copper haired man with headphones; deep red and black ones, not like the ones he usually wears. Mochizuki Ryoji and Hanamura Yosuke respectively. Akira purses his lips.

“Looks like you got here without too much of a fuss,” comments Ryoji with a small smile. Akira moves to say something, but Morgana’s gone tense on his shoulder. He glances at the cat, who is hissing at Ryoji as his claws dig holes into his uniform. Well, there’s something to fix when he gets back home. Minato hums and reaches up to take off the headphones around his ears. He turns and the other three at the door turn with him.

“Come on. We’re late.” With that, the door slides open with a quiet hum and the four of them make their way inside. Akira gulps. Steeling himself, the Phantom Thieves walk into the domain of the Shadow Operatives.

The room is massive. It looks like a meeting room, with a few computers lining the back wall, but there is no table and no chairs. The only things occupying it are the computers, the projector screwed to the top of the ceiling, and a few choice house plants scattered around the room. At the back of the room, standing tall and grand with a sword—is that a rapier?—in front of her is Kirijo Mitsuru herself.

“Akira,” she addresses him, curt and short. He nods because that’s all his body is allowing him to do. Minato, Ryoji, Souji, and Yosuke walk towards her and flank her sides, Minato and Ryoji on one, the other two on the other.

Then he sees their weapons and the door slams shut behind them.

 _You’re an idiot for not noticing_ , his mind snaps and he feels no need to snap back because now things just got 100% more threatening. Both Minato and Souji carry sheaths at their sides, Souji’s longer like a katana. Yosuke takes out a single kunai from inside his jacket before throwing it up and catching it repeatedly. It’s effortless. Ryoji isn’t doing anything nor is he holding anything, but Akira’s not going to take any chances.

 _So that’s how it’s going to be, huh?_ Akira thinks. He inhales. Exhales. His friends are on high alert and have been ever since they came in. “Ryuji, Ann, Morgana. With me. Yusuke, Makoto, Futaba, watch our six.”

“Got it, Leader,” Futaba pipes before she and the other two turn around. Morgana hops off Akira’s shoulder and lands in front of him. In tandem, Akira, Ann, Ryuji, and Morgana fall into defensive stances. They have no weapons, no armor, no enhanced strength the Metaverse would grant them, but he knows a fight is brewing when he sees one. Even if they have nothing, they have their fists. _Thank god Makoto roped us into self-defense classes._ Immediately, Mitsuru’s eyebrow raises slightly.

“Impressive. It seems like your group trained for something like this,” she comments.

Akira smirks. “But of course. Shadows can get a little reckless. It won’t do to be inadequate while surrounded by Shadows, no?” He lets himself lean casually, but still tense and ready to let loose. The light bounces off his glasses just enough to make them glare. “I must say the same for you, Mitsuru-senpai. I know some of the senpais are rather... difficult to rein in.” Some of his senpais would kill him for saying that, but it’s not like any of them are in this room right now. Mitsuru purses her lips.

“You’ve grown quite the backbone since leaving Inaba. Not that you had a lack of any to begin with.” Akira glares at her. He could feel Ann and Ryuji tense at his sides as well while Morgana hisses by his feet. Mitsuru sheaths her rapier and crosses her arms, her fur coat falling gracefully lower on her forearms. “As you’re probably aware, Hanamura and Kujikawa have already relayed what had happened in your previous meeting to us, so we are already aware of your methods, your targets, as well as your involvement in the Metaverse, so this meeting is more of a formality.”

“Are you going to try to convince us to stop?” he snaps, venom coating his words, “Because we already told Yosuke-senpai and Rise-senpai that we wouldn’t. You can’t stop us.” He breaks eye contact with her to look at his other senpai. “None of you can’t.” Mitsuru hmphs, a quiet sound Akira could have barely heard. She shakes her head. Behind him, Futaba and Yusuke are making confused sounds.

“Do you honestly take us as that foolish, Akira?” Akira’s eyes widen. “Only fools would attempt to get in the way of the destiny of a Wild Card and his band of Persona users.” _What?_ Mitsuru cranes her head and calls out, “Come in.” The door behind slides open much faster that it did before. All the Thieves flinch; Akira readies to snap orders and grimaces, eyes darting every which way. Of course they weren’t going to be the only ones looking for a fight! Did Junpei-senpai hear his comment? Did Chie-sensei hear?

Footsteps march from the doors in a frightening kind of synchronicity. Akira carefully keeps his eyes open for potential threats as they make their way to—what?

“Chairs? And tables?” he sputters because what the fuck is going on right now. Instead of the armed guards or better yet, other Shadow Operatives he and the others were expecting, butlers and maids comes filing in carrying white tables and chairs.

“What the hell…?” Ann wonders as she watches each butler and maid set down a set of table and chair for the five members and, like it was completely freaking normal, sit down as other maids comes up to them with small teacups and a pot of tea. Those serious looks on their faces melt right off when Ryoji cheerfully asks a maid for a plate of cake while Yosuke gingerly noms on some of the cookies set in front of him. The fuck? Mitsuru sits gracefully onto her chair, whispering to her butler something that none of them could hear.

“Yo, d’ya think those butlers and maid have guns with them…?” Ryuji mumbles loud enough for Akira to hear. He can’t believe that sentence could actually exist. Akira opens his mouth to spit some confused comment, but a heavy thud resounds behind him.

Yusuke squawks in surprise. “My word!” That’s it, what’s going on here? Akira spins around on his heel and his jaw drops onto the ground.

The band of butlers behind the Phantom Thieves nod their heads at them before setting down a _fucking couch_. In fact, it’s the same couch from the room they had woken up in, but bigger, enough to fit them all. What. The. Hell.

Akira’s mind is just a mess of questions without answers while his Personas are just fucking cackling it up in there—the hell guys, he’s confused, okay?

“Hahaha, looks like we got you guys good!” Ryoji cackles, smiling as Minato chews on small cakes. He raises his cup and sips from it, grinning gleefully. “Come on now, sit down, get comfortable.”

“I’m so lost,” utters Ryuji.

“Fuckin’ mood,” Futaba mutters before sprinting off to the couch. Akira and Makoto look at each other, mildly confused and disturbed, but they beckon the rest of the team towards the couch. Futaba had already made herself comfortable, snuggling right into one of the armrests.

“Someone please tell me what’s going on here.” Akira doesn’t want to admit he’s begging, but he’s at the right amount of confused to resort to it! “I swear I thought I was gonna have to fight you guys.”

Ryoji snorts into his cup, spilling some over on his table. Rude. Minato throws a napkin at him for his trouble. Souji smiles. “Of course you did. That was all part of the plan.” Grey eyes blink.

“Excuse me—plan??”

Mitsuru chuckles at them. “I’m sure you have been expecting a more hostile meeting, but honestly, I had set it up specifically to make you all comfortable. Some of our local pranksters just wanted to scare you a little bit before we got to business.” She smiles at all of them as a maid sets down snacks and pastries on their table. Now that’s a smile Akira is familiar with; the big sister smile.

“I didn’t actually think Mitsuru-senpai would’ve agreed to it, but hey, goes to show how much we love scaring Akira!” cackles Ryoji, laughing with a cake in his mouth. Ann scrambles forward with her hands on her knees while still hopelessly lost.

“Then the whole thing in the hall! Was that part of it?!” she demands.

“Normally,” Minato breaks in, “the members of the SO wouldn’t all converge for a meeting like this, but because it gave them an opportunity to pull a stunt like that, they had no problem gathering for a trick.” Akira gapes at them. He chokes out a laugh that sounds a little to hysterical as Yosuke leans onto his table with a grin splitting his face in half.

“Did we scare you?” he goads. “Come on, tell us!”

“Shitless,” Akira squeaks and all five of them start laughing or chuckling. Even Minato breaks into a smile. He shakes his head. Why did he expect his senpais to actually be serious for something like this? He reaches over for one of the cookies on the dainty white plate. He starts nibbling on it and, confirming that it’s not poisonous food, his team immediately dive for the free food. Mitsuru chuckles as she sips on her own tea.

“Much of this operation was arranged by Arisato and Seta. You should thank them for frightening you.” She smirks. “Though many of us did indeed enjoy the kick of instilling fear into our cocky kouhai…”

“You’re all evil! Every single one of you!” Akira screeches but it sounds a lot shriller than it should have since he has a cake half eaten in his mouth. Belatedly, he hears Ann and Ryuji start fighting over the macarons. “Especially you, Souji-senpai, Minato-senpai!” He points at them with his fork. “How dare you!” Minato rolls his eyes.

“Dramatic as usual,” he mumbles. Souji laughs as he fiddles with his ring.

“There was a lot put into this operation, Akira. You should be thankful we gave you such a unique welcome,” he says.

“Yeah,” Yosuke snorts next to him. “The SO did the same thing to us when they first called a meeting. I thought I was gonna shit my pants.” Souji smiles while Akira groans and leans onto Ryuji, who is still arguing with Ann about something or other. He pouts at his senpai.

“You guys~, I thought I was gonna have a heart attack!” Ryoji beams at him.

“Then we did our job well! Instilling the fear of Persona users into the hearts of the unsuspecting is what we do best!” Minato huffs.

“Keep telling yourself that, Ryoji.”

“Minato~!” Ryoji drapes himself onto Minato’s shoulder as Minato reaches over to Ryoji’s scarf. He tugs on it, mumbling something none of the Thieves can hear. Mitsuru clears her throat. “I believe we should get started, now that it seems like we have settled.” Ah right, business. She looks right at Akira while he sets down his plate of goodies. “Where would you like me to start?”

“About the Shadow Operatives. What are you guys?”

“A wise choice,” Mitsuru replies, nodding. “As you know, we are unofficially known as the Shadow Operatives. Officially, we are a part of the Security Department of the police, the Shadow Response Unit.” Makoto starts at that; her eyes glitter with curiosity while simultaneously snatching a waffer from Akira’s hand. The fearless leader whines.

“You’re part of the police? Why haven’t I ever heard of you before?” she asks.

“Do you have connections with the police?” asks Mitsuru back. Makoto hums and shoves the wafer into her mouth. Akira makes a dying whale noise.

“Ah, kind of? My sister is a public prosecutor, part of the Special Investigations Unit.”

Yosuke suddenly snaps his fingers. He points at her, like he recognized her. “You know, your last name did sound familiar. You’re Nijima Sae’s kid sister, right?” Makoto nods. Yosuke adjusts himself so that he’s leaning back onto his chair. “Ahkihiko-senpai and Chie sometimes talk about her. Anyway, the SO are an underground part of the police, so to say. A lot of the normal members of the police and justice system don’t know about us. Only some higher ups who know how to keep a secret can.”

“While we have direct ties with the Kirijo Group, comprising of scientists and researchers like the ones you had seen outside, who study Shadows and their activity,” Mitsuru continues, “our job is to actively go out on missions to encounter and defeat these Shadows.” Ryuji whistles.

“So cool…” he mutters and Akira reaches over to pat his arm. The members smirk at him.

“Sounds like it’s from a movie, right?” Souji reckons, “The SO are a very real thing. There are a lot of abnormal things we have to handle.” Yosuke and Ryoji nod to that.

“The Shadow Operatives comprise of two groups of Persona users who have dealt with Shadows and their ilk for years.” Mitsuru cocks her head to the right, where Minato is sitting. “To your left is the field leader of the Special Extracurricular Execution Squad, also known as SEES, Arisato Minato as well as his designated second-in-command if I’m not around, Mochizuki Ryoji.” Minato nods his head and Ryoji grins. Futaba awes nearby. Mitsuru cocks her head to her left, where Souji is sitting. “To your right are the co-leaders of the Investigation Team, also known as the IT, Seta Souji and Hanamura Yosuke.” Souji nods as well while Yosuke winks. Ryuji is practically vibrating next to Akira.

“So the Shadow Operatives are basically the two teams of former Persona users mixed together?” Ann asks. Mitsuru nods.

“That is correct. While the SO do work in tandem with each other, if there is a need to split it in any way, there are teams established that we still follow and uphold.” Mitsuru switches her arms over her chest and takes a deep sigh. "There is actually something else important that we want to discuss with you, but that will have to be at a later date."

Akira cocks his head at her a little bit. "Why not now?"

"We've got a designated agenda today and Mitsuru-senpai doesn't want to keep you longer than she has to," Souji replies. Akira pouts.

"Aw, sick of us already?" he croons and Minato rolls his eyes.

Ryoji giggles. "Come on, teenagers. There's business to be had," he admonishes.

"Says the teenager in an adult's body!"

"I will neither confirm nor deny that statement."

"Anyway," Mitsuru loudly clear her throat while subsequently instilling some fear into everyone. "You have already been told much about the IT, but there are some details Kujikawa and Hanamura had left out."

"Yes.” Souji shifts on his seat, picking up his cup of tea. “We formed to solve the case of the murders and kidnappings in Inaba using the Midnight Channel. It had stemmed from an urban myth, where, if you watched your TV when it was raining at midnight, your soulmate would appear on the screen.”

“We had decided to check it out, Partner and I,” Yosuke continues, “and that’s where we saw the second victim.”

“Konishi Saki, right?” Ann speaks up. Souji nods. Yosuke's hand goes still around his cup.

The grey haired leader clears his throat. “She had been the second of a bunch of kidnappings that would end up taking place over the next few months. Though we had been too late to save her, we ended up figuring out a pattern that would let us save the next victims of the kidnapper.”

“The Midnight Channel was the key in our plans,” the other leader picks up, “Every time it rained, we would check the Midnight Channel in case someone would appear. The channel acts as a sort of timer. It would show the potential victim covered in static and we would have some time to figure out who they are before they get thrown into the TV. Although,” he sighs, “we were never able to prevent one of the potential victims from not being thrown in the TV. But all the victims of the kidnappings were saved before anything life threatening could happen to them.”

"If I remember correctly, the serial killer who killed Yamano-san and Konishi-san was caught, right?" Yusuke asks.

"Correct. He had fooled another man into believing that throwing the victims into the TV would save them, not kill them. For a long time, we were going in circles about who was the one behind everything.”

"Even then we weren't totally right. It was some goddess's fault or something, but that's not something we should be talking about."

Akira pauses in his nibbling. "Oh? Why not?"

"You are not at the end of your journey. We will tell you eventually, when your journey reaches to a close." Ryuji guffaws.

"Damn, really?! It's already been like, months since we started!" Souji shrugs.

"You will know when you reach that point in your life. But for now, we should give the floor to Minato, Ryoji, and Mitsuru-san. I trust they have a lot more to say."

"Thank you, Seta." Wordlessly, Mitsuru places her cup back on her saucer and looks up at the collection of teenagers in front of her. "Tell me, do you know about the Fall?"

"The Fall? Like a waterfall or something like that?" Ryuji asks.

Minato snorts. "I wish."

"Over two decades ago," Mitsuru begins, "my grandfather and his scientists began research about Shadows and their properties of space-time manipulation. From there, he discovered an age old prophecy that foretold the end of the world.”

“Prophecy? Like… like those crazy people we see in movies?” Ann wonders.

“In a sense. This prophecy was later known as the Fall. The Mother of Shadows, Nyx, was to descend on the Earth and destroy humanity.”

“What?!”

“What the hell—you never told me—”

“Mother of Shadows?! What does—”

“Enough.” Minato’s voice cuts through the Thieves’ own. “Let her speak.” Mitsuru sighs.

“Many of those who worked on the research found solace in Nyx’s eventual return, believing it was for the good of humanity. In end, they wanted to hasten the coming of Nyx by collecting and summoning Shadows to create Death, the believed Harbinger of the Fall.” Gaping, Morgana jumps onto the table, ignoring the others’ sudden cries for their endless amount of snacks.

“How can that be? How did they even manage to collect Shadows? Shadows can’t just waltz into the real world!” Morgana stops, realizing they can’t understand him, but Ryoji suddenly starts speaking.

“If they have the ability to develop an ego and a human conscious, Shadows can indeed come to the real world by themselves," he says. Misturu nods.

"My grandfather’s methods are unknown to me. I do not know if he had access to the Metaverse or not, but the research he and his team had done proved to be a success.” All actions stop. Chills race down their spines.

“You mean...” Futaba trails off. Mitsuru nods.

“Yes. They had summoned and resurrected Death.”

Makoto gulps as she finds her grip on one of the pillows of the couch. The others are shocked as well and Akira looks too pale to be normal. “How… how close had we been to the end of the world…?”

“I’m not certain, but I do know that Death hadn’t had the chance to call forth Nyx,” Mitsuru answers. “One of my grandfather’s scientists had decided to interrupt the experiment in its last stages. He destroyed the facility and forcibly separated Death into twelve Shadows, all representing the Fool arcana up to the Hanged Man arcana. The main shadow itself, the Death arcana, was sealed inside a child to prevent the pieces from ever meeting.”

“Shit, man…” Ryuji rubs the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable. “We were really that close, huh?”

“Don’t be fooled though. There had been people left alive who participated in the experiment, who had wanted the Fall to come to pass even after that event. The subsequent destruction of so many Shadows had created what we called the Dark Hour, a hidden 25th hour of the day where the real world would warp into a world of sickly green and blood.”

“So then this Dark Hour existed in the real world?” Yusuke bites on the small wafer on his plate after asking.

“Indeed it did. Some of our experts believe that the energy emitted by the destroyed and separated Shadows ripped a part of the Metaverse into our world and made a pocket for itself to reside in. The experiment had irreversibly changed the fabric of space-time because now that the Harbinger of Nyx had taken form, the Shadows would be attempting to reform Death and resume the Fall.” Ann bounces further back onto the couch.

“But you guys had stopped it, right? That’s what SEES was for?”

Minato nods. “Yeah. SEES was formed to get rid of Shadows and ultimately the Dark Hour, but we started off doing more damage than good.”

“Huh?”

“You see, the person that had been advising SEES had been tricking them into hastening the Fall by reuniting the twelve Shadows back to the 13th Shadow.” And Akira accidentally knocks over Futaba’s plate of goods.

“What the hell?! How did you guys not know?!” he exclaims while ignoring Futaba’s stink eye.

“We had been under the guise that defeating the 12 strong Shadows that appeared during the full moon would end the Dark Hour, but we had been deceived,” Mitsuru sighs for the umpteenth time while shaking her head.

“Defeating the 12 Shadows was the trick to reuniting themselves with Death,” Ryoji clarifies. “So each time they defeated one, they would return to the 13th Shadow if it was around.”

“But you guys said that Death was sealed inside a child, right?” Akira asks, “How would the defeat of those Shadows return to Death?”

“That child had come back to Iwatodai after the ordeal, ten years later,” says Mitsuru.

“Do you know who it was? Because I can guess you—”

“It was me.”

The Phantom Thieves collectively freeze; shock and fear rush into them in waves while Minato nonchalantly takes another nibble on Ryoji’s cookies. “Mi-Minato-senpai?” Akira sputters. Minato blinks as Mitsuru gives him a stern look.

“Arisato, must you always be so blunt?”

“I think the result would have been the same either way, senpai.”

“Ah, point taken.”

“Wait holy shit you had Death living inside you for ten years?!” screeches Ryuji after he jumps to his feet and points at the vessel of Death— _holy shit._ Morgana’s pawing at Akira’s arm and trying to hide in his hair as Ryuji and Ann and basically all of his Thieves try to cram themselves further into the couch, hoping it would eat them alive.

“I did.”

“Wait, then did Death actually reform?!” Ann cries.

“He did.”

“WHAT?!” And the Thieves scramble even further onto the couch. But then couch starts creaking.

“Oh fu—” Groaning from the collective weight of teenagers all on the back of the couch, the couch tips over and slams onto its back with a loud thud. Everyone on the couch cry out with varying stages of hysteria before force takes them by the reins and they all roll off of the couch in various directions. Akira rolls onto his back and over before landing stomach down, the potted plant near the wall grazing its leaves over him like a hello. He’s groaning loudly, not because of pain, but because his senpais were having the time of their lives cackling. The others don’t look like they’re in comfortable positions either. Yusuke seems to have fallen into a plank for some reason.

“Ho-holy crap are you guys alright?!” calls Yosuke from beyond the couch, failing epically at stifling his laughter.

“P-peachy, Yosuke-senpai…” Akira groans. A breeze suddenly blows around his head and he looks up. Ryoji stands there, leaning over him and offering a hand to him, grinning. “Ryoji-senpai?! How did you get here so fast?”

“Reasons,” he chirps unhelpfully before Akira reaches up and grabs his hand. Single handedly, Ryoji lifts him back up on his feet. The boy stumbles a little bit, but manages stay upright while his teammates heave themselves back onto the fallen couch.

“You good?”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

“Good!” And then his smile becomes really and unsettlingly happy. “Congrats then, Akira-kun! You’ve just been helped up by the Harbinger of Death!”

 _What the fuck_ —

 

 **SO (Souji’s Overalls)** [Members: ALL OF THE SO]

 **ryooj** : ok so who here can pick up six teenagers and a cat and take them back home

 **cheese** : wtf what did u do

 **ryooj** : i told them i was death

 **door jesus** : he says told but he scared the shit out of akira and then he fainted from shock or some shit and then the pt tried to fight ryoji and he knocked them out

 **cheese** : wtf

 **Sakura Kiss** : Oh my.

 **jun-pain** : holy fuck u gotta have video

 **Kirimom** : Don’t worry, Iori. I have footage on my phone.

 **jun-pain** : memetsuru comin in with the assist again thanks

 **door jesus** : who’d expect mitsuru kirijo to condone our actions  
**door jesus** : what a world

 **the white aki** : are we still volunteering to carry kira and his friends home because i can do it.

 **cheese** : me too!!!!!!

 **Beary horny** : i will if sensei is!!!!! Ｏ(≧∇≦)Ｏ

 **That Gay Hana** : teddie stop lying to yourself you can’t even carry a bag of bricks.

 **Beary horny** : rude!!!!!! i’ve been training ever since i did that and i can tell you i can carrying one this time!!!!!! (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ̑̑

 **That Gay Hana** : keep telling yourself that ted

 **Beary horny** : ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚  mean yosuke!!!!!!!

 **That Bi Seta** : I think we’ll need someone tall enough to carrying Akira’s friend who is literally a stick and another person who is willing to carrying someone who might resort to hand-to-hand combat if she ever wakes up being carried.

 **ryooj** : no worries about that souji! they’ll be out of it for a few more hours!

 **That Bi Seta** : You said that the last time you accidently knocked someone out and, oh next thing you know, there’s a bruise on your cheek and you have a black eye.

 **ryooj** : nothing a good dia can’t solve!

 **That Bi Seta** : Damn you and your goddamn Universe husband.

 **door jesus** : hell yeah eat shit bowl cut

 **That Bi Seta** : I thought we went over this already.

 **door jesus** : your bowl cut will be forever remembered by the members of the so it will never escape you

 **ryooj** : rip press f to pay respects

 **cheese** : f

 **Sakura Kiss** : f

 **That Gay Hana** : f

 **Kirimom** : f

 **jun-pain** : f

 **Beary horny** : f

 **the white aki** : f

 **fluffiest bab** : holy shit this spam why the fs

 **door jesus** : souji’s bowl cut

 **fluffiest bab** : f

 **That Bi Seta** : Kanji why.

 **fluffiest bab** : ur bowl cut was fuckin sick senpai you can’t forget that

 **That Bi Seta** : But I wanna.

 **nao u see me nao u don’t** : f

 **That Bi Seta** : Even you Naoto?!

 **nao u see me nao u don’t** : I just wanted to grab your attention, senpai.  
**nao u see me nao u don’t** : Rise has taken the cat and is running out of the room.  
**nao u see me nao u don’t** : She's gone.

 **That Gay Hana** : congrats naoto you’ve convinced partner to overcome the laws of physHOLY SHIT HE JUMPED OVER THE TABLE AND THE COUCH

 **ryooj** : HE’S GONE

 **Kirimom** : And shouting, I believe.

 **That Gay Hana** : okay guys but seriously we need to get the pt back to leblanc before sojiro decides to hunt me down and make me into an ornament for the cafe.

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : what the fuck happened to us

 **super fluffy** : A supernatural entity and a death vessel have been taking care of me since I was little what is life

 **yeet** : imma sleep for eternity tell sojiro im actually listening to him and getting the right amount of z’s what the fuck

 **strawberry shortcake** : I think we’ll need to take a few days to process this

 **super fluffy** : Agreed.  
**super fluffy** : Morgana cast your spell on me

 **graphic design is my passion** : Do you mind if I sleep on your the couch, Akira? I feel no need to return to the dorms today after what transpired.

 **strawberry shortcake** : I think we all need that

 **super fluffy** : Call your parents and your guardians we need a post fuckery sleepover and cuddle under some blankets to process this shit  
**super fluffy** : Get ready to have the best sleep of your life

 **Morganya** : it’s only 6 in the afternoon guys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **super fluffy** : OMG THEN WHEN MINATO-SENPAI TALKED ABOUT THE YEARS HE SPENT INSIDE HIM HE WASN'T TALKING ABOUT WHAT I THOUGH HE WAS TALKING ABOUT
> 
>  **fists on wheels** : What.


	9. protect yusuke's hair from the scientists

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morgana acts like a cat, Yusuke complements everyone, and couples throw nicknames at each other. Also, the roster increases.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ready to sleep my dudes; have this. Not much happening here, just more headcanons as the dates advance.

**August 30, 2016 (Early Morning)  
  
— >Enter Here for Gays and Thieving<—  
  
** **Morganya** : lookatthisdork.jpeg  
**Morganya** : sneaky.jpeg  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Mona why  
  
**fists on wheels** : It’s nearly 5 in the morning.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : the fuck u have a camera???  
  
**yeet** : of course he does moron my techs only the best of the best  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuckni forgot to turn off my alarm  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : fuckni  
  
**yeet** : fuckni  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : screw yall ‘s too early for this shit  
  
**Morganya** : behold my magnum opus.  
**Morganya** : bestgift.jpeg  
**Morganya** : he never saw it coming.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : HOLY FUCKIGN SHIT  
  
**yeet** : eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : MONA OMFG  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : How unsanitary...!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Morgana why??  
  
**yeet** : MONA IS A CAT CONFIRMED HE KILLS MICE AND BRINGS THEM TO HIS OWNER  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Mouse carcass...  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : you good yusuke?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Despicable rascals...  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I didn’t think LeBlanc had rats  
  
**Morganya** : it doesn’t.  
**Morganya** : i brought it in from outside.  
  
**fists on wheels** : That’s mildly disturbing, Morgana.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : And gross  
  
**yeet** : anything for revenge  
  
**Morganya** : futaba gets me!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : thats just because she globally releases the bank details of people she hates in her free time  
  
**yeet** : revenge bonehead revenge  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : What did Akira do this time?  
  
**Morganya** : no it’s not akira’s fault it’s just that one of the so had started calling me kitty and petting my fur and tried playing with me and since i can’t get in direct contact with him akira’s the next best thing.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : omfg  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Ah.  
  
**yeet** : what’s the definition of morgana?  
**yeet** : suburban dictionary says being petty af  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : S U B U R B A N  D I C T I O N A R Y  
  
**fists on wheels** : Bringing Akira a dead rat seems a bit... over the top.  
  
**Morganya** : normal cats do it all the time apparently!  
  
**fists on wheels** : True. It’s not like any of us can claim we know since we’ve never had cats.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I had a dog when I was living in America  
**strawberry shortcake** : I think she’s staying with my relatives now  
  
**yeet** : !!!!!!!! pics pics pics  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hold up let me ask them real quick  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : why are we up at 5  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : lemme sleeeeeeeeeeeeeep  
  
**yeet** : too late now bitch we’re up and ready to spam ur phone  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : hhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : poochie.jpeg  
**strawberry shortcake** : Her  
  
**yeet** : wow she’s big!!!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Is that a Siberian Husky?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Yeah!!! She’s kinda old now but she was a gift from one of my aunts when I was little!!  
  
**graphics design is my passion** : Your relatives gave you pets as gifts?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Yeah I had those kinds of relatives that would spend their life savings on a birthday gift  
**strawberry shortcake** : One of my uncles tried to give me a car for my 10th birthday  
  
**yeet** : omg  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : aw man id love a dog  
  
**super fluffy** : We’ll get one when we move in together  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : !!!!!!! he wake  
  
**yeet** : *scooby-do sound*  
  
**super fluffy** : Ugh it smells gross here wh  
  
**Morganya** : oh wait he’s awaOH SHIT GOTTA DASH.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Morgana?!  
  
**yeet** : mona’s fuckin dead  
  
**Morganya** : AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.  
  
**yeet** : jesus i can hear akira from here  
**yeet** : oh wait thats cause he went outta the café  
  
**Morganya** : MORGANA I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL SEND YOU TO THE FUCKING SHADOW REALM.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : HAHAHAHA MONA’S MIC’S PCIKIN AKI UP FUCKIN WOW  
  
**yeet** : goddamn 4kids  
  
**fists on wheels** : 4kids?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : What is that?  
  
**Morganya** : STOP MOVING YOU STINKING CAT SO I CAN CHUCK THIS RAT AT YOU.  
  
**yeet** : ohoho now thats a category of memes to get into  
**yeet** : listen well young grasshoppers because tabas gonna tell yall a thing called ~Americans~  
  
**Morganya** : SGDHAKKDBFGEUDFHAK

* * *

 **super fluffy** : What’s up guys I’m back  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sup aki!  
  
**super fluffy** : <3 What’s happening  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Futaba’s telling Yusuke and Makoto about 4Kids while you were out killing Morgana  
  
**yeet** : and thats how 4kids is total shit at localizing anime!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Wow.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : How amusing.  
  
**Morganya** : not dead.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : You sure  
  
**Morganya** : yeah. just tired.  
  
**super fluffy** : I chased him around the block a few times and I’m pretty sure I ruined two dates but that doesn’t really matter because rat carcass  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : whered ya put the rat  
  
**super fluffy** : I‘ve given it a proper burial because i’m nice  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Do you mean you’re mice?  
  
**super fluffy** : Fickbn  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Punsuke strikes again  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : That’s not how my name is spelled.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : On purpose Yusuke!! We do it all the time!!!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : I believe all of our names got the same treatment.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : momkoto  
  
**fists on wheels** : Do you feel like dying today, Sakamoto?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : naw thanks i like my life rn  
  
**super fluffy** : Can’t do much with ann’s name since it’s 1 syllable  
**super fluffy** : But you get the special treatment Yusuke  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : How?  
  
**super fluffy** : I named my plant after you  
  
**yeet** : holy crap really  
  
**super fluffy** : Treesuke needs love, affection, and food he can’t get himself to grow tall, beautiful, and strong  
  
**fists on wheels** : How accurate.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : You think I’m beautiful?  
  
**super fluffy** : O  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : have you seen your face dude??????  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Seriously??  
  
**fists on wheels** : You are quite the looker, Yusuke.  
  
**yeet** : yeah!!!! ur hair’s really pretty and soft and even thought ur a fuckin twig you carry urself really elegantly!!!!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I  
  
**super fluffy** : Shit guys we broke him  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : coughcoughmorelikefutababrokehimcoughcough  
  
**yeet** : ssssshhhhhhhhhhh  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : If it’s consolation, all of you are stunning as well.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Ryuji is quite handsome with his athletic build and, if I may, his legs look like they can crush a skull in half. The baby fat around his cheeks accent his round eyes and his grin can bring lights to the world on even the darkest of days.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Ann is similar to Ryuji in how she shines and her baby blue eyes are akin to cut aquamarines. Her quirks aside, even without makeup her face is naturally stunning and able to pull in even the most suspecting onlooker.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Makoto carries a fierce grace with her, though she doesn’t lack in showing off her femininity. Her eyes are a stunning mixture of maroon and crimson; hair the softest of browns like chocolate.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Morgana is even a cute specimen of cat withh his deep noir coat, white accents, and stunning blue eyes.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Akira boasts of being mysterious and keeping to himself, but none can deny how cute it is when his hair frames his face with delicate curls, how his eyes are a deep silver slate and his eyelashes make them pop.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Futaba herself is petite, but she is beautiful as well, with how her orange hair flows down her back and her bright purple eyes glitter behind her glasses when she sees something she likes. Her innocent charm covers up her true, dastardly wicked self, but it makes her unique and a gem in her own right.  
**graphic design is my passion** : My, that is much more than I have ever typed.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Hello?  
**graphic design is my passion** : Anyone?  
  
**yeet** :（＠´＿｀＠）hhhhhhhh  
  
**super fluffy** : hhhooylly,,,.,,,,,  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Omg I feel like imma die my face burns  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shit dude,,same,,,  
  
**fists on wheels** : Oh my...  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Hm? You all seem broken.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Not that I can see you.  
  
**Morganya** : well, that’s one way to render the entire group speechless.  
**Morganya** : you killed akira. he’s trying to suffocate himself with his pillow.  
**Morganya** : hesdying.jpeg  
  
**yeet** : mood  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : so much mood  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i’m,,,,,, so gay  
  
**super fluffy** : Yusuke stop trying to steal my boyfriend  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I swear I don’t mean it, Akira. All of you are pleasing to the eye, that is all.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Let’s change the topic before half of us faint from blood rushing to our heads.  
  
**super fluffy** : Hhhhhhhhhh  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Alright then. Americans are strange.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : what kinda subject change is that?!?!!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hey!!! :(((  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : no no no that face aint gonna help u ur weird as fuck  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : You got me there ;)c  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : damn straight  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : *damn bi  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shit u right  
  
**super fluffy** : Ann I know you’re part American but by how much?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Oh my dad is full Japanese and my mom’s half Japanese and half American so I’m quarter!!  
  
**yeet** : cool  
**yeet** : im part european i think but i dunno what country  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : wha?? how do you know?  
  
**yeet** : you think this orange hair is common?? hell naw  
  
**super fluffy** : Ireland maybe? There’s a bunch of gingers there  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Anywhere in North Europe is more common to have ginger hair  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : holy fuck futaba ur a fuckin elf!!  
  
**yeet** : it’s leprechaun you idiot and no i am not  
**yeet** : is ur hair naturally blue inari  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Surprisingly it is. I believe there are little to no cases about children with natural blue hair.  
  
**super fluffy** : Yusuke’s a special cookie  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Thank you.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : alright dudes if the hair scientists come to take him away we gotta fight then alright  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Shit he might be experimented on for his hair secrets  
  
**fists on wheels** : I don’t think there would actually be people looking for Yusuke for his hair.  
  
**super fluffy** : You never know Makoto  
**super fluffy** : He’s gonna get famous for his art  
**super fluffy** : And when people come up to him they’re gonna notice his hair  
**super fluffy** : They’re gonna be like  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : “my my that hair of yours is quite stunning tell me, is it natural?”  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : And since Yusuke’s honest to a fault he’ll say it is and then he’s gonna get kidnapped and experimented on!!  
  
**yeet** : i have a chip on his phone no worries  
  
**fists on wheels** : Well, if the possibility stands, Yusuke knows how to defend himself.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : The self-defense classes have done wonders, Makoto.  
  
**super fluffy** : Alright y’all now that i don’t feel like I’m gonna explode from emotion I’m cookin shit today  
**super fluffy** : Who wants to kill their taste buds at LeBlanc? Sojiro picked up a fun little spice from the market yesterday  
  
**fists on wheels** : I’m ready to sacrifice myself for the sake of lunch, so please, make it so my death is somewhat to the benefit of others.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Holy shit Queen  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : summers so boring im comin with  
  
**super fluffy** : You’re gonna die love  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : at least ill die in your arms baby  
  
**super fluffy** : Honey  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sweetheart  
  
**super fluffy** : Dearest  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : cinnamon bun  
  
**super fluffy** : Snookums  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I’ll stop by too!!!!!! Murder me with your curry!!!  
**strawberry shortcake** : And I’m this close to adding Shiho to the group chat so if you wanna keep it as just the pt you better stop because i’m jealous!!!!!!!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Whatever for?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Because they’re all gross and mushy when I can’t be!!!!!  
  
**super fluffy** : Well why didn’t you say so  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Huh?  
  
_super fluffy added Suzui Shiho to the chat!_  
  
**super fluffy** : Welcome to the club Shiho  
  
_Suzui Shiho changed their name to shihohoho!  
  
_ **shihohoho** : oh!!! what’s this?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : SHIHO!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : wazzup shiho!  
  
**shihohoho** : hi ryuji-kun!!!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Hello once again, Shiho.  
  
**shihohoho** : hi nijima-san!!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Now now shiho first name basis only!!! We’re all friends!!  
  
**shihohoho** : makoto-san then!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Better!!!  
  
**shihohoho** : what is this?  
  
**super fluffy** : Welcome to the Phantom Thieves’ meme chat, now with our awesomest confidants aka friends aka relatives aka motherfuckers  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : AKIRA DID YOU JUST REVEAL  
  
**super fluffy** : ?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : hate to break it to ya ann but ur acting sucks major balls and shiho aint dumb  
  
**shihohoho** : i’ve figured for a while now actually hahaha.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!!  
  
**shihohoho** : don’t worry i know you weren’t telling me for protection it’s fine!!!!!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : GUYS I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND  
  
**super fluffy** : WE LOVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND TOO ANN  
  
**shihohoho** : i know makoto-san, akira-kun, and ryuji-kun, but who are the others?  
  
**yeet** : sakura futaba!!!! weve never met but i love ur username!!  
  
**shihohoho** : thank you~!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I am Kitagawa Yusuke, a student at Kosei High School. You might know me as the tall blue haired one in photos Ann no doubtedly showed you.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Guilty as charged  
  
**shihohoho** : ah yes! that one!  
**shihohoho** : well, it’s nice to meet you two!  
  
**yeet** : same to u shiho!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Indeed.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Anyway there’s a reason you’re here babe  
  
**shihohoho** : what is it?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : WE MUST OVERTHROW AKIRA AND RYUJI AS MOST SAPPY COUPLE IN THE MEME CHAT WITH PET NAMES  
  
**shihohoho** : really now, honey?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hell yeah sweetie  
  
**shihohoho** : darling  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Sugarlips  
  
**fists on wheels** : I’m ready to die, Akira.  
  
**shihohoho** : love of my life  
  
**super fluffy** : Come on in, I’ve got a special pot brewing up as we speak! Text, whatever  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Soulmate  
  
**fists on wheels** : RIP me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shiho's great and I love her.
> 
> I'll be skipping a good few days in the timeline because you know what's coming? The Hawaii trip!!!! Which will not be 5 days!! It'll be 7, not too much of an improvement, but I have reasons.


	10. im gonna drown the school system in a vat of oil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phantom Thieves are back in school and everything sucks! Luckily, we've got Shiho, unexpected revelations, and Hawaii coming up! Also, Akira's dad scares everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note here; I went back and edited all of the chapters for Ryuji and Futaba's chat dialogue b/c they're the type to do shorthand more often, some word choice errors, and the time breaks. Not too much change though!!
> 
> Multiple days in one chapter now because we've gotta pick up the pace!!!

**September 4, 2016**

  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—  
  
** **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i admit it  
**CATCH THSE HANDS** : im fuckin dumb  
  
**Morganya** : tell us something we don’t know.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ur lucky my bed is too comfy or i wouldve gone over to leblanc and started skinning u with a butter knife cat  
  
**super fluffy** : Whoa whoa why the death threats? Morgana hasn’t scratched you in 5 days  
  
**yeet** : new record  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sorry sorry but schools just kickin my ass  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : futabas palace didnt help either no offense tho  
  
**yeet** : none taken dude  
**  
** **CATCH THESE HANDS** : and with the whole deal with the so im dying from school  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I know right?! Summer vacation’s made me forget what we did before then!  
**strawberry shortcake** : Pythagorean theorem? Definitions? All out of my brain!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Why don’t you ask for tutoring? I don’t mind clearing my schedule to help.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : nah i cant bother u with this makoto ur still stressing out over ur sister and her laptop and stuff  
  
**fists on wheels** : Sometimes I forget how perceptive you are with emotions.  
  
**super fluffy** : You could ask me, Ryu  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : haha u need as much help as i do asswipe dont think mona doesnt tell me about ur midnight walks and screaming outta the window  
  
**super fluffy** : You fuckin cat  
  
**Morganya** : eat ass.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : That’s bc Akira sleeps in class and makes lockpicks and bombs when we have free time instead of studying  
  
**super fluffy** : You forgot that I also read a good book  
  
**Morganya** : he says good book but he means teen magazines  
  
**super fluffy** : HEY THOSE THINGS CAN DO WONDERS FOR MY CHARM STOP MESSING WITH MY FLOW MONA  
  
**Morganya** : NEVER.  
  
**fists on wheels** : How exactly do you have top exam grades on the exams?  
  
**super fluffy** : I am a perfect being  
**super fluffy** : The gods of the heavens and the underworld whisper into my ear knowledge that transcends time and space  
  
**Morganya** : he’s just really good at memorizing things.  
  
**super fluffy** : fuckin  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I admit I would like assistance in studying as well.  
  
**yeet** : wow even u inari  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Yes. My French prowess falls a little flat compared to my Japanese.  
  
**super fluffy** : French?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Art transcends spoken word. The meanings of pieces of art can differ all throughout the world, for even the most bizarre interpretations may hold a sliver of truth in them.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : But French? Impressive!!!!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Kosei carries many languages under its belt. French is just one of many.  
  
**super fluffy** : None of us speak French tho... The most I know are the basic greetings and whatever shpeal Arsène goes through but it’s not like I can translate him  
  
**fists on wheels** : I’m afraid none of us can help you there, Yusuke. Shujin only offers English.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I see.  
  
**yeet** : google translate could help  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Only heathens use Google Translate.  
  
**yeet** : Σ(゜ロ゜;)  
  
**CATCH THE HANDS** : RIGHT IN THE FUCKIN HEART INARI  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : h e a t h e n  
  
**fist on wheels** : That’s what you get, Ryuji.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : h  e  a  t  h  e  n  
  
**super fluffy** : applycoldwatertoburn.png  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : IM SURROUNDED  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : BY SHITFUCKS  
  
**super fluffy** : We only do it because we love you Ryu (´∀｀)♡  
  
**yeet** : u mean u do it bc u love him  
**yeet** : i do it bc its fun  
  
**Morganya** : same.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yall suck

 **strawberry shortcake** : In short we’re all useless after summer break so we all need help!!  
  
**super fluffy** : That about sums it up  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuck school  
  
**super fluffy** : Mood  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Mood  
  
**fists on wheels** : Mood.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I don’t exactly understand the concept, but mood.  
  
**yeet** : if gt aint ur forte i could search online for any tutors nearby  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : and get roped into our business? yeah no  
  
**super fluffy** : Can’t deny that  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Phantom thieves need flexible schedules!! Who knows when we get a request for something and we can’t study?!  
  
**fists on wheels** : We could just study together like we usually do.  
  
**super fluffy** : Do you wanna finish that thought Makoto?  
  
**fists on wheels** : Nevermind; we’re all teenagers with superpowers who would rather raid an alternate dimension and fight the repressed consciousness than tackle homework.  
  
**super fluffy** : She’s learning I’m so proud  
  
**shihohoho** : i could help!  
  
**super fluffy** : Holy shit shiho i forgot about you  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : hoW  D A R E Y O U  
**strawberry shortcake** : F O R G E T  
**strawberry shortcake** : M Y  G I R L

 **shihohoho** : i was napping!

 **fists on wheels** : Sorry, we must’ve woken you up.

 **shihohoho** : it’s fine, kashiwagi-sensei never picks on me anyway. she usually picks on the boys.

 **super fluffy** : Are you in effin class

 **shihohoho** : kinda?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : YES SHIHO REBEL

 **shihohoho** : my teacher’s ordered everyone to stay for a little longer after class to discuss the culture festival happening soon! she wanted everyone’s opinions.  
**shihohoho** : and by everyone’s opinions i mean the guys’ opinions.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Grade A teacher right there  
  
**shihohoho** : i know right?  
**shihohoho** : anyway, i think i know just the people to call on for tutoring super naturally powered teens.  
**shihohoho** : not kashiwagi. she would just try to get the guys to suck face with her.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : FUCKIN EXCUSE M ヽ(#`Д´)ﾉ

 **super fluffy** : Do I have to throw hands

 **shihohoho** : to her, maybe. but not who i recommend.  
**shihohoho** : he’s kinda weird, but he’s a teacher i personally trust. doesn’t visit often, but he’s super nice!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Who is it!! Spill!!!!!

 **super fluffy** : Is it who I think it is  
  
**shihohoho** : you came from inaba, right akira-kun? then you know exactly who i mean.

 **super fluffy** : ...Oh

 **yeet** : owo whats this?  
**yeet** : secwets?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : CURSED  
  
**fists on wheels** : CURSED PHRASE.

 **strawberry shortcake** : NO OWO HERE YOU GREMLIN  
  
**yeet** : FUCK THE RULES

 **super fluffy** : johntronstop.gif

 **yeet** : NEVER  
**yeet** : u were sayin shiho  
  
**shihohoho** : it’s a long story.  
**shihohoho** : but seta-san is perfect for you guys!

 **strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!!!  
  
**super fluffy** : The fuck  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : holy shit  
  
**fists on wheels** : How?? What???  
  
**shihohoho** : :)  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I’m surprised you didn’t recommend him, Akira. You have quite the vast network of connections.  
  
**super fluffy** : I was gonna then Shiho stole my thunder  
  
**shihohoho** : sorry not sorry.  
  
**super fluffy** : Evil  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : How did you meet him? He was in Tokyo just a week ago

 **shihohoho** : i got recruited by the shadow operatives.

 **super fluffy** : …

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : WHAT THE FUCK

 **eternal rest** : ain't that a mood

 **Tiny Munchkin** : SOUJI-SENPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAI  
**Tiny Munchkin** : FUCKIN  
**Tiny Munchkin** : STOP WITH THE SURPRISES

 **Walking Spoon:** ;)

 

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**fists on wheels** : They found out about us about a week ago.  
**fists on wheels** : No thanks to Akira.  
  
**super fluffy** : Y’all,,,  
  
**shihohoho** : they found me a week ago. apparently, a bunch of yasogami high alumni were looking for me so they let me go for the day.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Where were your parents?  
  
**shihohoho** : they told them it was for a job opportunity. they found out i was connected to ann and offered to let me work at inaba’s branch of the shadow operatives as an intern.  
**  
** **CATCH THESE HANDS** : so like a secret agent?! that sounds cool as shit  
  
**shihohoho** : top secret information. ;)  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : damn  
  
**yeet** : she probably handles intern bullshit from office work  
  
**shihohoho** : ...not quite.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : suspicious.jpeg  
  
**super fluffy** : I can’t tell if you meme on accident or on purpose anymore Yusuke  
  
**shihohoho** : but i’m doing safe things! nothing bad.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I’m holding you to that babe  
  
**shihohoho** : don’t worry~.  
  
**super fluffy** : thejduckin  
**super fluffy** : Brb my dudes time to call my emergency contact  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : our tutor?  
  
**super fluffy** : Yee  
  
**shihohoho** : wonderful! it’s been a while since I’ve actually seen him.  
  
_super fluffy has added Seta Souji to the chat!  
  
Seta Souji changed his name to Sets!  
  
_ **Sets** : Hello, children.  
**Sets** : I heard Akira is looking for a tutor?  
  
**fists on wheels** : Yes. Seta-san, correct?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : the one with the grey hair i think  
  
**Sets** : It is I.  
  
**shihohoho** : hi seta-san!  
  
**Sets** : Oh, hello Shiho-chan.  
  
**super fluffy** : Can’t believe you recruited Shiho into the SO before us how dare  
  
**Sets** : She’s the only one not in Tokyo with the main group. Of course we would look after one of the current Wild Card’s Social Links.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : wha  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : What’s that  
  
**yeet** : whomst  
  
**super fluffy** : It’s ‘Confidants’ actually. And she's more like a friend of a Confidant  
  
**Sets** : ...  
**Sets** : Gross.  
  
**super fluffy** : You’re gross  
  
**fist on wheels** : Ahem.  
  
**super fluffy** : Shit the mom stare transcends technology  
**super fluffy** : You know what you’re here for senpai  
  
**Sets** : As a guinea pig for all of your newest memes?  
  
**yeet** : ...is he offering  
  
**super fluffy** : Are you offering  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Don’t do it.  
  
**yeet** : >:( >:( >:( party pooper inari  
  
**Sets** : ...I’m sure I could handle memes from you guys. You can’t be as bad as Rise and Ryoji when they get drunk.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : affiqpfhvdyf  
  
**super fluffy** : Screencapped, saved, put as my laptop screen  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I can’t believe Risette drunk meme texts I’m living  
  
**Sets** : I have a folder’s worth of blurry pictures of everyone’s faces in the SO when both of them tried to sneak up on everyone to take a photo while drunk off every liquor known to man  
  
**yeet** : gimME GIMME GIMME  
  
**Sets** : No.  
  
**yeet** : :((((((  
  
**Sets** : ...Not yet.  
  
**yeet** : :DDDDD  
  
**super fluffy** : You fool, do you know what you’ve gotten yourself into  
**super fluffy** : She’s gonna release your nudes on every platform of social media  
  
**yeet** : now that hes promised to give me material i wont  
**yeet** : u and bonehead over there tho...  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuck aki i dont wanna die!!!  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i havent even gotten to propose to u yet  
  
**super fluffy** : :Oc  
**super fluffy** : Ryu...  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Are we about to witness history in the making  
  
**Morganya** : i’m tearing up.  
  
**super fluffy** : Wow Morgana you’re not even gonna be considerate  
**super fluffy** : I gave you shelter  
**super fluffy** : I feed you  
**super fluffy** : Is this how you repay me?!  
  
**Morganya** : sojiro does that, dumbass.  
**Morganya** : and you guys are already basically married so good for you i guess.

 **super fluffy** : I knew you had kindness in you Mona  
  
**Sets** : I love how off topic this is.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Welcome to the Gay Thieving chat, I guess.  
  
**Sets** : Going to have to stop the marriage proposal here, children.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : U CANT TELL ME WHAT TO DO  
  
**super fluffy** : TELL EM BABE  
  
**Sets** : There are about 20 people you have to get by first because there no way we’re letting Akira out of our clutches before he’s 25.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : oh fuck  
  
**shihohoho** : r.i.p. in pieces ryuji-kun.  
**shihohoho** : tip: they have battle axes.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : THAT DOESNT MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER  
  
**super fluffy** : I’m so sorry Ryu  
  
**Sets** : Get ready to get thrown into the sun, Sakamoto.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ,,,,,,,,,,,,fuk  
  
**Sets** : Besides, I can’t let you get married before me.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Are we actually going to get any studying done?

 

**September 5, 2016**

 

**Kurusu Family**

**Akira** : Hey dad, are you busy?

 **Dad** : Not at the moment. What do you need?

 **Akira** : I accidentally shipped my 500 pack of Fruit Roll Ups back at home and I was wondering if you could drop them off here.

 **Dad** : Of course you did, Akira.

 **Akira** : :)

 **Dad** : How soon do you need them? I assume you’re bringing them with you to Hawaii.

 **Akira** : Bingo!  
**Akira** : I’m leaving on the 7th.

 **Dad** : Then I’ll see you on the 6th. There is some business I have to take care of.

 **Akira** : Are you staying for the whole day?

 **Dad** : I’m afraid not, but the next time I come, I’ll spend the entire day with you and your friends, alright?

 **Akira** : You don’t have to do that!

 **Dad** : I haven’t visited you since you arrived in Tokyo. You deserve it, son.

 **Akira** : Hmmm, okay then. I’ll be sure to tell Sojiro when you come by then.

 **Dad** : Say hello to that old fart for me when you get the chance.

 **Akira** : You’re the old fart, dad!!

 **Dad** : :P

 

**September 6, 2016**

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**strawberry shortcake** : You’re fuckin dead Ryuji

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : hoe dont remind me

 **strawberry shortcake** : Kurusu-san’s gonna break you in half with his arms alone

 **super fluffy** : ,,,babe

 **shihohoho** : what happened?

 **super fluffy** : My dad came up to Tokyo for a bit to drop something off

 **shihohoho** : so that’s where hitomu-san went!

 **fists on wheels** : You know Akira’s dad, Shiho?

 **shihohoho** : when you live in a small town like inaba, you know everyone.  
**shihohoho** : he might look scary, but he’s a very nice man!

 **yeet** : scary she says  
**yeet** : he looks like a fuckin yakuza

 **super fluffy** : My dad isn’t yakuza

 **yeet** : areyousure.png

 **super fluffy** : What are these  
**super fluffy** : Archaic memes

 **fits on wheels** : No offense Akira, but your dad looks like he could kill a man

 **super fluffy** : Rude  
**super fluffy** : But not totally incorrect

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ?!!!?!???!!??!!?!?!!?!??!!

 **strawberry shortcake** : I don’t like those implications

 **super fluffy** : Haha I’m joking guys  
**super fluffy** : ...Or am I

 **yeet** : his arm looked rad tho

 **fists on wheels** : It certainly was a very nice looking prosthetic.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Yeah!! I didn't realize it was fake until we walked up to the car!!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : real talk babe can ur dad actually lift 80 kgs with that arm

 **super fluffy** : ...It came from the Kirijo Group so they enhanced it okay

 **strawberry shortcake** : Holy shit I can't believe Ryuji's gonna die

 **graphic design is my passion** : You don’t look a lot like him, Akira.

 **super fluffy** : Nah, Ren and I took after our mom more  
**super fluffy** : Looks, attitude, everything  
**super fluffy** : Well, Ren took after dad’s personality and oh look now I’m sad

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : IM OUTTA THE HOUSE I TOLD MA IT WAS A BOYFRIEND MERGENCY IM GOING THERE RIGHT NOW

 **super fluffy** : RYUJI WE’RE LEAVING FOR HAWAII TOMORROW YOU NEED TO GET ALL OF YOUR STUFF READY

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : I DONT KNOW WHAT PREPARATION IS

 **Sets** : Hitomu-san just texted me to tell you since you're not responding that he wants souvenirs, Akira.

 **super fluffy** : What does he want?

 **Sets** : A jar full of sand from Hawaii.

 **super fluffy** : Can do  
**super fluffy** : Anyway RYUJI GO BACK HOME

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : NO

  

**September 7, 2016**

**  
  
Sakura Futaba — > Seta Souji  
  
****Sakura Futaba** : yo  
  
**Seta Souji** : Should I be surprised that you contacted me?  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : u shouldnt be ur in the meme chat   
  
**Seta Souji** : You're right. What do you need?  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : eh just wanted to contact ya  
**Sakura Futaba** : akira and the others are on the plane headed to hawaii so i dont have anyone i can bother  
  
**Seta Souji** : Not even on your meme chat?  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : everyones offline b/c a buncha students are superstitious and dont wanna crash the plane  
**Sakura Futaba** : or thats what aki told me  
  
**Seta Souji** : You realize that I might be in class?

 **Sakura Futaba** : u wouldntve replied back if u were  
  
**Seta Souji** : True.  
**Seta Souji** : You said Akira was going to Hawaii… For how long?

 **Sakura Futaba** : he didnt tell u?  
**Sakura Futaba** : shujins second years are gonna go to hawaii until the 17th

 **Seta Souji** : Shit really?  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : y?  
  
**Seta Souji** : Akira’s birthday is on 15th. We’re going to have to reschedule the party...  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : ...  
  
**Seta Souji** : Futaba-chan?  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : ...makotos gonna kill akira for not tellin  
**Sakura Futaba** : not all of us are gonna be together for his birthday too  
**Sakura Futaba** : fuckin bummer  
  
**Seta Souji** : ...Hold on a moment.  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : ?

 

 **Seta Souji — > Kirijo Mitsuru  
  
****Seta Souji** : How much are you willing to spend to party in Hawaii?  
  
**Kirijo Mitsuru** : ...I’m listening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **fists on wheels** : So are you going to explain that whole thing about Confidants and Social Links?
> 
>  **super fluffy** : ...Eventually
> 
> * * *
> 
> Kurusu Hitomu is a force to be reckoned with. Don't worry my dudes, he'll be back. ;)
> 
> Akira's birthday is September 15th, the date P5 came out in Japan! Same goes for Minato and Souji; their birthdays are the Japanese release date of their respective games.
> 
> ...DID I SAY 7 DAYS FOR HAWAII TRIP HAHA IT'S 10 DAYS NOW.


	11. it's time to quESTION ATLUS'S WRITING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phantom Thieves have a serious chat about Kosei's flight redirection, Makoto really shines in this chapter, and things get really cute and sappy. Also, Haru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had _a lot of issues_ with Atlus's writing at this point and the preparation for Hawaii in the first place, so have a _proper_ plan and some _proper_ events that push the plot forward.
> 
> Can you tell I'm a little salty how little Hawaii was incorporated.
> 
> I DID A BUNCH OF RESEARCH FOR THIS I HOPE I'M RIGHT ABOUT SOME FACTS.

**Hawaii: September 7, 2016 (Morning)**

**Japan: September 8, 2016 (Early Morning)**

 

 **Phantom Thieves  
  
** **Joker** : Fox, details.  
  
**Fox** : Kosei’s flight to Los Angeles was scheduled to leave at 10:30 in the evening. We would be landing in Los Angeles on the morning of the 7th, but the flight abruptly changed to fly to Hawaii.  
**Fox** : It had happened mid flight as well. There was no one sick on on board, so there were no emergencies.  
  
**Queen** : I checked the weather forecast of California; the storm was severe, but I don’t think it was enough to completely redirect an airplane’s route.  
  
**Panther** : Are you sure nothing was going on, Fox?  
  
**Fox** : Positive. Had there been something wrong with the plane, I could been able to tell.  
  
**Queen** : Changes in air temperature, right?  
  
**Fox** : Yes. There was no drastic plummet or rise in temperature that might have meant a fire.

 **Mona** : Wait a minute; backtrack backtrack.  
**Mona** : What happened?  
  
**Oracle** : Inari’s in Hawaii for some reason.  
  
**Mona** : Really?   
  
**Joker** : He is. As much as I want to put this off as a coincidence, living as Phantom Thieves makes it be so that there are no such thing as coincidences. Someone purposefully change the direction of Kosei’s flight.  
  
**Skull** : It couldn’t‘ve been too bad, right? It’s not like he got here all beat up and shit.  
  
**Joker** : It’s not bad on the surface, but there’s more to be discussed than just the flight.  
**Joker** : Kosei probably had reservations for hotel rooms in Los Angeles. If they got their flight changed from there to Hawaii, did they reserve hotel rooms on the plane? Where are they staying?  
  
**Panther** : You’re right! I didn’t think about that!  
  
**Skull** : Aren’t hotel reservations supposed to be like, months in advance? What the hell kind of money does Kosei have?!  
  
**Queen** : I’m surprised Kosei actually got a place to stay. There weren’t that many hotels open for a group as big as Shujin’s.  
  
**Fox** : I’m unsure whether or not I can say we reserved or not.  
  
**Mona** : Why’s that?  
  
**Fox** : We’re not staying in a hotel. We’re staying in a mansion complex, I believe. On Niihau.  
  
**Joker** : What?!  
  
**Skull** : Holy shit!  
  
**Queen** : Niihau? How did you get access there?  
  
**Panther** : Is there something wrong?  
  
**Oracle** : Niihau is a privately owned island, passed on to a family who lived there by one of the old Hawaiian kings. Visitors are heavily restricted access, even other Hawaiian people can’t get into there!  
  
**Fox** : Is that so? As soon as we landed in Kauai, we were guided on a boat straight to Niihau.  
  
**Panther** : That’s really suspicious.  
  
**Skull** : I think so too.  
  
**Mona** : Hm, what if the people who redirected the flight are also the people who own Niihau?  
  
**Queen** : It’s not impossible. In fact, that might be the most likely case.  
  
**Oracle** : Give me a minute! I’ll have the info as soon as I can!  
  
**Queen** : What are you doing awake anyway, Oracle? It should be early morning in Japan.  
  
**Mona** : She doesn’t believe in sleep.  
  
**Queen** : You’re not wrong...  
  
**Oracle** : Oh. Well.  
**Oracle** : I don’t think we have to worry about any murders or experiments. Maybe. I don’t know.  
  
**Skull** : Why? What’d you find?  
  
**Oracle** : Niihau is owned by the Kirijo family. They head the operations to preserve Niihau’s culture and prevent too much outside influence on the native people.  
**Oracle** : It’s not too far fetched to assume that there’s a branch of the Kirijo Group there.  
  
**Joker** : ...  
**Joker** : Should I even be surprised anymore.  
  
**Queen** : You really shouldn’t.  
  
**Joker** : You’re right.  
  
  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—  
  
** **super fluffy** : @Sets  
**super fluffy** : @Sets  
**super fluffy** : @Sets  
**super fluffy** : @Sets  
  
**yeet** : SPAM SPAM SPAM  
  
**Sets** : It’s 3 in the morning, Akira.  
  
**super fluffy** : For you sucker but it’s 8 in the morning for us and I have some words for you  
  
**Sets** : What is it?  
  
**super fluffy** : Mitsuru-senpai did something again didn’t she  
  
**Sets** : Correct.  
  
**fists on wheels** : You’re being rather forthcoming.  
  
**Sets** : It’s 3 in the morning. The faster we get this over with, the faster I can go back to sleep.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : But don’t you have class?  
  
**Sets** : Don’t remind me.  
  
**super fluffy** : Did she redirect Kosei’s flight  
  
**Sets** : Probably.  
  
**super fluffy** : Why  
  
**Sets** : Because the 15th is during your trip and she wanted the Thieves to be together.  
  
**fists on wheels** : The 15th? What’s so special about the 15th?  
  
**Sets** : ...You never told them?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i was sworn to secrecy  
  
**super fluffy** : Shit  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : What’s the big deal?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : can i say it  
  
**super fluffy** : You do that  
**super fluffy** : I’m gonna go and swan dive into the ocean before Makoto can get to my body  
  
**yeet** :（・□・；）  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : akis birthday is on the 15th  
  
**Sets** : Correct.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i got u a present babe  
  
**super fluffy** : Thanks love just set it next to my grave  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : np  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Akira!!!!!! Why didn’t you tell us?  
  
**yeet** : btw i only knew bc seta-san told me  
  
**super fluffy** : What answer will kill me less  
  
**fists on wheels** : ...You’re lucky there are a few floors of hotel between us or I would have wrung you up on a pole.  
  
**super fluffy** : Σ(゜ロ゜;)  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I suppose I must find a birthday first for you then. Do you like lobsters, Akira?  
  
**super fluffy** : It didn’t really come to mind  
**super fluffy** : None of you asked Ryuji just found out on accident  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah on accident  
  
_(In another chat...  
  
**Seta Souji — > Sakamoto Ryuji**_

 _ **Seta Souji** : Akira’s birthday is on September 15.  
  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : really?!)  
_  
**super fluffy** : And yes I like lobsters but to eat not to admire  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : You monster...!  
  
**fists on wheels** : You’re off the hook this time, Kurusu. You’re going to enjoy your birthday here in Hawaii whether you like it or not.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : But won’t that defeat the purpose if he doesn’t like it?  
  
**fists on wheels** : Point.  
**fists on wheels** : Then we’re going to have a party on the 15th. It’s a break day for us.  
  
**Sets** : Break days? You have an itinerary?  
  
**fists on wheels** : But of course. Even though there’s been a lot going on, the Student Council still set up a schedule for the trip.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : imagine if they didnt  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : we would be runnin around and breakin rules n shit  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Don’t forget that we would be bored for 10 days too  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : that too  
  
**yeet** : whatre u guys doing

 **fists on wheels** : On most even days, we’ll be visiting each of the islands. Most odd days are our break days. Since it’s the 7th for us, we’re having a break to recover from jet lag as much as possible and we’ll start visiting islands tomorrow.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Kosei doesn’t necessarily have an itinerary because of the sudden location change.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : how long r u staying anyway

 **graphic design is my passion** : We will be leaving on the evening of the 17.

 **super fluffy** : Oh same

 **strawberry shortcake** : Convenient!!

 **graphic design is my passion** : But that mean that I will be spending 10 days without much to do...

 **super fluffy** : I’m sure you can buddy with us  
**super fluffy** : Are your teachers giving you free reign

 **graphic design is my passion** : I assume so, as long as we don’t break Hawaiian law.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Come with us Yusuke!!!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : weve got space!!!  
  
**fists on wheels** : Is any of your administration here, Yusuke?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : The Student Council President is here as well as some teachers.

 **fists on wheels** : Excellent. Is it possible for me to get a hold of them?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Let me see. Hold on for a moment.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : r we actually gonna get yusuke to join us  
  
**fists on wheels** : Trust me, it won’t be hard.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Are you sure?  
  
**fists on wheels** : I can be very convincing when I want to be.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : holy shit

 **super fluffy** : She’s asserting her dominance

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : makoto and akiras dad should arm wrestle  
  
**super fluffy** : ...Do I even have to tell you it’s a bad idea  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : no bc its a good idea  
  
**super fluffy** : You’re right MAKOTO ARE YOU WILLING TO FACE MY DAD IN SINGLE COMBAT VIA ARM WRESTLING  
  
**fists on wheels** : I’m sure I could give Kurusu-san a challenge. Only if he’s using his flesh arm though.  
  
**super fluffy** : Sweet SOUJI-SENPAI YOU GET THAT  
**super fluffy** : SENPAI  
**super fluffy** : SENPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAI  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : He probably fell asleep!!  
  
**shihohoho** : the fuck.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shihO SAID THE F  
  
**shihohoho** : go the fuck to sleep.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Oh there she is  
**strawberry shortcake** : Guys meet sleep deprived Shiho  
**strawberry shortcake** : AKA Before Coffee Shiho  
**strawberry shortcake** : AAKA Sailor Mouth Cranky Shiho  
  
**shihohoho** : bitches be noisy.  
  
**super fluffy** : ...Can someone go down to Inaba and silence Shiho’s phone because Shiho cursing is like reading words directly spawned from satan  
  
**yeet** : i would but this is too fun  
  
**super fluffy** : I thought you went to sleep  
  
**yeet** : i am with u in spirit  
**yeet** : my ghost haunts ur outlets and dishwashers  
**yeet** : it slams doors closed repeatedly until u pee ur pants or faint  
**yeet** : it ascends to the heavens every morning to curse the existence of the sun and its hurtful beams  
  
**super fluffy** : ...How many cups of coffee have you had  
  
**yeet** : too many to count my dude  
  
**super fluffy** : I’m gonna make like Morgana and tell you to GO TO SLEEP  
  
**yeet** : NEVER  
  
**shihohoho** : y’all are a clusterfuck.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Shiho please...!!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : My word, I missed a lot while I was away.  
  
**fists on wheels** : Did you get permission?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : They want to meet with you in person.  
  
**fists on wheels** : I can do that. Since I can’t exactly go to Niihau, let me DM you the hotel’s address and I can meet them here.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Alright.  
  
**shihohoho** : hoes.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : SHIHO!

* * *

Makoto sighs as the Student Council President of Kosei stands and walks away. It didn’t take much to convince them that Yusuke would be fine with hanging out with Shujin, but they had been insistent on the amount of paperwork and precautions they needed to take care of in case Yusuke got hurt. Yusuke would be perfectly fine if he did get hurt, though. He wasn’t a Phantom Thief for nothing.

Makoto crosses her arms and looks up over the brim of her sunglasses. The small roadside cafe gives an excellent view of families meandering the sidewalks, of car ambling up and down roads. Small clusters of tourists chattering in smatterings of English and other languages pass by her, unaware of her watchful gaze.

 _I don’t think it will be too much of a detour to stay here for a while_ , she thinks. Much of Shujin’s second years were probably sleeping off jet lag. Thanks to the bone deep exhaustion the Phantom Thieves suffered during their excursions, jet lag didn’t hit them nearly as hard as it would have. Wordlessly, Makoto reaches into her bag and pulls out a tiny book, one of the ones Souji-san had recommended to her when he was free.

“In case you want to learn a little more about our Personas, there are many books that outline the stories of the Shadow Operatives’ Personas,” he had said with a wink, “You can start with the Investigation Team’s.”

Normally, nonfiction wasn’t something Makoto reads too often, but the new perspective she now had on different characters of myths renewed her intense vigor for knowledge of new Personas. So, she scooches around on her seat for a little while to get comfortable before opening the book about the creation of Japan and starts reading.

Time isn’t something she is at all aware of when she reads. Engrossed with the book, she wonders… Which ones are the Personas of the Investigation Team? Yosuke-san had mentioned having a Persona named Takehaya Susano-o. Was it the same Susano-o of the Kojiki? How similar was Takehaya Susano-o to Yusuke’s Kamu Susano-o? Are they representative of the same god, but in different forms? Were all Personas of the Investigation Team correspondent to Japanese folklore? That might be the case, or it might not be, since the Phantom Thieves’ Personas all come from different figures in literature and history…

“Excuse me?” Makoto jolts in her seat with a small yelp. Accidentally kicking one of the legs of the table, her glass of water rattles violently but doesn’t tip over. The person across from her, the one who had surprised surprised her, gasps. “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you!” Shaking her head, Makoto pushes her sunglasses on the top of her head and closes her book.

“No, that was my own fault. I should have been paying attention to my surroundings,” she replies. There was no real danger in letting her guard down during a trip like this, right? Makoto places the book on the table before looking up at the person who had walked up to her. Recognition flashes in her mind. “Oh, are you from Shujin?” The skirt she wears and her speaking Japanese is telling enough, but there was no harm in making sure.

The girl nods her head, smiling bashfully. “Yes! I'm one of the third years who agreed to come. Um, I had noticed you sitting by yourself here, do you mind if I give you some company?" Makoto blinks. This is a surprising turn of events. Students usually leave Makoto alone when she was doing something. Well, except for the Phantom Thieves, but they were the Phantom Thieves, so she expected them to butt into her business.

"No, not at all," she says back and the girl's smile widens ever so slightly. Makoto's heart jumps just a little bit. She watches as the girl pulls the chair across from her back and sits down. Her smile is soft and angelic. Whoa wait, what?

"I forgot to introduce myself," she says, her hands on her lap, "My name is Okumura Haru. It's nice to meet you, Nijima-san!" Oh wow, is this what sitting in close proximity to the sun feels like?

"Please, just call me Makoto. We're away from school. No need for the formalities."

"Then you can call me Haru." Haru pauses. "If I'm not being to invasive, I was wondering, why are you sitting here by yourself?"

Makoto takes a sip of her water before answering. "Well, since most of the second years are probably lounging around and fending off jet lag, I thought it was high time I get a chance to unwind before we set off on our trips tomorrow. I'm afraid I'm used to the exhaustion jet lag brings." Haru claps her hands, her expression brightening more than it already was.

"Oh, I as well!" she replies, exuberant. "It's been a while since I've gone away from home, so I'm rather used to feeling jet lag. There is nothing better than a nice walk around the area! There is a lot to see in Oahu, though the other islands of Hawaii are very nice too."

Makoto leans onto the table, smiling. "It sounds like you've been here before."

Haru nods. "I used to go abroad many times when I was younger, but not as much now."

"Well, while I have done extensive research of Hawaii's best sights, do you know any notable sights we could visit in our time here?"

"Yes of course! Let me get my notebook for a moment..." As Haru reaches into her small handbag to pull out an equally tiny notebook and a pencil, Makoto orders another glass of water for Haru and a refill. They were going to be here for a while.

 

**Hawaii: September 7, 2016 (Evening)**

**Japan: September 8, 2016 (Late Afternoon)**

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**fists on wheels** : Guys.  
**fists on wheels** : Guys.  
**fists on wheels** : GUYS.

 **Morganya** : i think the others finally went to sleep.

 **Sets** : About time, to be honest.

 **fists on wheels** : Oh hello, you two. As much as I appreciate both of your presences, I don't think you can help in my hour of need.

 **Sets** : Harsh.

 **Morganya** : that depends on what it is, makoto.

 **fists on wheels** : ...God, I need to do that now.

 **Sets** : Makoto-chan?

 **fists on wheels** : There's one sure-fire way to get the attention of the Phantom Thieves.  
**fists on wheels** : Here goes.  
**fists on wheels** : imgay.gif

 **yeet** : WOO WOO WOO WOO IS THAT A MEME

 **super fluffy** : DID MAKOTO NIJIMA JUST SUMMON OUR PATRON MEME

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : IM AWAKE FOR THIS SHIT

 **strawberry shortcake** : OMG WHAT HAPPENED FOR MAKOTO TO SUBMIT TO THE MEME

 **graphic design is my passion** : I'm rather lost, but you did get the attention of all of us.

 **Morganya** : when you said you knew how to get their attention…

 **fists on wheels** : The green suit guy hasn't had a single failure ever since I joined the Phantom Thieves.

 **super fluffy** : PATRON MEME

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : PATRON MEME

 **strawberry shortcake** : PATRON MEME

 **yeet** : PATRON MEME oh wait im not gay WHATEVER PATRON MEME

 **super fluffy** : GREEN SUIT GUY IS THE PATRON MEME FOR ALL SEXUALITIES SPREAD THE WORD

 **fists on wheels** : There was actually a reason for me calling everyone here, you know that right?  
**fists on wheels** : Well, everyone except for Shiho.

 **shihohoho** : i'm here!

 **strawberry shortcake** : There she is!!! <3 <3 <3

 **shihohoho** : practice just ended! and i'm sorry for what happened earlier. before coffee me doesn't have the greatest filter.

 **super fluffy** : Even though she makes me want to bleach my brain to purge the thought of not pure Shiho it's fine  
**super fluffy** : We all have our off days  
**super fluffy** : Off hours whatever

 **shihohoho** : thank you!!

 **strawberry shortcake** : So what's up, Makoto??

 **fists on wheels** : Well, after I had met with Kosei's SCP, I was meaning to spend the rest of the afternoon by myself.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : did smth happen???

 **fists on wheels** : A girl had walked up and asked if she could give me company since I looked lonely.

 **super fluffy** : :OOOOOOOOO

 **strawberry shortcake** : MAKOTO WHAT DID SHE LOOK LIKE

 **fists on wheels** : She had this short poofy hair and her eyes were really nice light chocolate her voice was really soft and oh my god my face is so red right now.

 **strawberry shortcake** : OMG MAKO!!!!!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : CONFIRMED QUEEN HAS A CRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSH

 **fists on wheels** : Why did I tell you guys?

 **super fluffy** : Because most of us are well versed in romance and you wanted advice

 **fists on wheels** : ...I hate it when you’re right.

 **super fluffy** : HAHA SHE ADMITS IT

 **strawberry shortcake** : Wait but if you met her in Hawaii this is the only time you’ll see her!!

 **fists on wheels** : Don’t worry about that. She goes to Shujin. She’s actually one of the third years that are helping to chaperone.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Cool!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : whatre u planning to do

 **fists on wheels** : Well, I want to continue to speak with her and get to know her, but I have to focus on chaperoning you guys on the trip.

 **super fluffy** : We could always help you chaperone Makoto  
**super fluffy** : We don’t follow government rules but we will follow the rules of our advisor

 **strawberry shortcake** : And the other third years and teachers are chaperoning too

 **strawberry shortcake** : Maybe you and this girl can chaperone the same group *cough cough* class 2-D and class 2-E *cough cough* together!!!

 **fists on wheels** : That doesn’t sound that bad of an idea…  
**fists on wheels** : Alright. Chaperones do have free reign on who they want to look after anyway.

 **super fluffy** : Sweet

 **yeet** : good luck getting ur girl

 **fists on wheels** : She’s not my girl! We just met!

 **yeet** : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **super fluffy** : Welcome to the Hopelessly Smitten Club Makoto  
**super fluffy** : Population: every single goddamn Phantom Thief except for Morgana as well as half of the SO

 **Sets** : True.

 **yeet** : im not smitten!!!

 **super fluffy** : :/

 **strawberry shortcake** : :\

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : :|

 **yeet** : ...shut up

 **graphic design is my passion** : Then there is no use in denying the truth. I like Futaba.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : :O

 **yeet** : ━Σ(ﾟДﾟ|||)━

 **super fluffy** : Yusuke there is something called TACT

 **yeet** : INARI DM ME RN WE NEED TO TALK  
**yeet** : BETTER YET CALL ME I AM NOT LEAVING THIS ALONE

 **graphic design is my passion** : Alright.

 **strawberry shortcake** : WOW IS THIS JUST A CONFESSION SESSION RIGHT NOW

 **super fluffy** : In that case I love Ryuji with all my heart soul and mind

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : !!!!!!!!!!!! i love akira to the ends of the world and back i would do anything to make him happy!!!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Shiho is the best girlfriend in the entire world and I love her soooooooooo much!!

 **shihohoho** : ann is amazing and perfect and worth all the stars in the sky and i love her too!

 **Sets** : I would face against gods and demons to bring as much joy to the life of my dearest best friend and fiancé, Hanamura Yosuke.

 **Morganya** : well, i…  
**Morganya** : i kinda realized a while ago that you guys would be really sad if i up and left... and that i really do have a use in the phantom thieves... that you guys aren't the type to write me off as a monster or leave me alone when i get my memories back…  
**Morganya** : I LOVE ALL OF YOU GUYS.  
**Morganya** : I LOVE THE PHANTOM THIEVES.  
**Morganya** : YOU'RE ALL THE BEST.

 **super fluffy** : FUCK MORGANA  
**super fluffy** : WHY TF AM I MILES AWAY FROM YOU YOU NEED HUGS MY FUKIN CAT

 **strawberry shortcake** : I'M CRYING IN MY BED MY ROOMMATE IS GOING TO STARE AT ME BUT I DON'T CARE

 **super fluffy** : MISHIMA’S LOOKING AT ME WORRIEDLY BECAUSE I’M SOBBING

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ...you know i say things w/out thinking right mona

 **Morganya** : yeah. i know. don't worry, ryuji. i love you too.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : FUCK  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : AKIRA IM RAIDING YOUR ROOM I NEED HUGS

 **Morganya** : come on, guys. you should go to sleep. it should be around bed time in hawaii right now, if the clock's right.  
**Morganya** : have fun tomorrow!

 

**Niijima Makoto — > Haru Okumura**

**Niijima Makoto** : I hope it's fine if I contact you like this.

 **Okumura Haru** : it's fine!! i'm the one who gave you my phone number, anyway!  
 **Okumura Haru** : good night, makoto!

 **Niijima Makoto** : Good night, Haru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **graphic design is my passion** : I suppose I can say I'm taken now.
> 
>  **super fluffy** : :O
> 
>  **CATCH THESE HANDS** : :D
> 
>  **strawberry shortcake** : ＼＼\\(۶•̀ᴗ•́)۶//／／
> 
> * * *
> 
> \- Niihau is an actual island owned by a family, which had been entrusted to them by King Kamehameha V in order to preserve Niihau culture. It's mostly closed to visitors, but Niihauans can move out of the island if they want to.
> 
> \- If anyone is curious, Shujin is staying in a hotel in Oahu (since the special events in-game take place in Waikiki Beach according to the wiki) and they'll be visiting Oahu on the 8th (on an official tour), Kauai on the 10th, Molokai and Lanai on the 12th, and the Big Island on the 14th. The 15th and 16th are free days if they want to return to another of the islands.
> 
> \- Yusuke's sensitivity of air temperature is a manifestation of his Metaverse powers in the real world, which will be covered in another chapter. It's different here than in other stories, though.
> 
> \- WE'RE HAVING NONE OF THAT MORGANA RUNNING AWAY IN MY HOUSE
> 
> \- The little part of Makoto's point of view is actually how I usually write. Akira just thinks completely out of whack and this is supposed to be 50% crack.


	12. what if the phantom thieves got into american idol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for TURTLES, dismantled air conditioners, singing, and questioning budgets in this chapter! Also, phone conversations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! What with finals, the internet cutting off, and getting sick, this month's been _the greatest_.

**Hawaii: September 8, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**Japan: September 9, 2016 (Noon)**

 

**Sakura Futaba — > Seta Souji**

**Sakura Futaba** : wtf.jpeg  
  
**Seta Souji** : :3c  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : r u for fukin real  
  
**Seta Souji** : If I’m correct, you and Sojiro-san will leave on the evening of the 10th.  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : is this... a private airline  
  
**Seta Souji** : Yes. There was no way Mitsuru-san could have booked tickets so soon, so she’s taking advantage of her private airline. No fees to you and Sojiro-san, of course.  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : damn now i owe u guys a favor  
  
**Seta Souji** : Really?  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : alibaba doesnt do things free of charge but if u guys need some cracking into files u have 1 free pass  
  
**Seta Souji** : Hmm, interesting.  
 **Seta Souji** : There is actually something I want you to look into.  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : ?  
  
**Seta Souji** : Not for my benefit, but more for yours.  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : what is it  
  
**Seta Souji** : Okumura Kunikazu. The man at the peak of the polls of the Aficionado website.  
  
**Sakura Futaba** : u look at the phansite  
  
**Seta Souji** : Of course. If we can’t watch you directly, that’s the next best thing.  
 **Seta Souji** : I feel like he’ll be your next target, so you best prepare.

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**strawberry shortcake** : Who else's legs feel like dying today?

 **super fluffy** : Mine

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ditto

 **graphic design is my passion** : That was a much longer trip than I anticipated.

 **yeet** : arent u guys right next to each other

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : nah we’re back in our rooms and dying

 **Morganya** : how was the first day?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuckin LIT

 **strawberry shortcake** : Say it with me now: TURTLES!!!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : TURTLES!!!

 **super fluffy** : TURTLES!!!

 **fists on wheels** : We went snorkeling and looking for sea turtles in the morning and into afternoon before they gave us free reign to explore as much of the island as we could. With chaperones, of course.

 **graphic design is my passion** : I couldn’t go snorkeling, but there was a beautiful scenery I drew in my sketchbook.

 **strawberry shortcake** : But the turtles!!!

 **Morganya** : did you get pictures?!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : duh!!

 **super fluffy** : Thank god for Futaba and her wonders  
**super fluffy** :  turtle.jpeg  
**super fluffy** :  somuchturtles.jpeg  
**super fluffy** :  squadunderwater.jpeg 

**CATCH THESE HANDS** :  meandakiplusturtle.jpeg 

**strawberry shortcake** :  swimmingwithturtles.mov 

**yeet** : !!!!!! them!!!

 **Morganya** : oh my god ryuji that one behind you!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i kno that one just came outta nowhere when i was takin a picture

 **super fluffy** : It swam into the frame before he realized it was there

 **strawberry shortcake** : Best photobomb ever!!!

 **super fluffy** : Top 10 photos taken before disaster

 **fists on wheels** : It’s the opposite of a disaster I think.

 **super fluffy** : Top 10 photos taken before being blessed

 **fists on wheels** : Better.

 **strawberry shortcake** : We’ve got more!!!

 **yeet** : lets not flood the chat send them to me!!!!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Sure!  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hold on, I’ve got one more picture to show you… Here!!  
**strawberry shortcake** :  makotoandhergirl.jpeg 

**fists on wheels** : Ann!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **super fluffy** : ( ͡°ω ͡°)

 **yeet** : whoa shes pretty

 **super fluffy** : And very polite

 **graphic design is my passion** : Ah yes, she was very nice.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah she was super chill

 **strawberry shortcake** : And super sweet!

 **super fluffy** : Her hair is fluffier than my future

 **Morganya** : that doesn’t even make sense, akira.

 **super fluffy** : You don’t make sense!

 **Morganya** : Rude

 **fists on wheels** : Thank goodness you all weren’t nearly as insane as you usually are. Points for making a good impression.

 **super fluffy** : We’re not insane Makoto where have you gotten that idea

 **fists on wheels** : Might I need to remind you about that one time you tried to swan dive into the vat of money in Kaneshiro’s Palace?  
**fists on wheels** : How about willing jumping into the quicksand in Futaba’s Palace just to find out what was on the other end?

 **super fluffy** : That was for research that didn’t count

 **fists on wheels** : Don’t even get me started on the amount of times every single one of you has given me a heart attack every time you yell Phantom Thieves in public

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ok thats mostly me and i admit it

 **fists on wheels** : Yusuke has stopped in the middle of the street enough times to settle the amount of heart attacks I should have in a lifetime.

 **yeet** : inari why  
**yeet** : actually dont answer that i know why: scenery

 **graphic design is my passion** : Indeed.

 **strawberry shortcake** : I haven’t done anything wrong!!

 **fists on wheels** : …

 **strawberry shortcake** : Nevermind I’ve done a lot of things I acknowledge!!!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : doesnt even need to be said u go queen

 **super fluffy** : You know, if you’re gonna get to know her more she’s gonna meet the thieves

 **fists on wheels** : Only out of necessity.

 **super fluffy** : Of course

 **yeet** : god ‘her’ ‘she’ whats her name???

 **fists on wheels** : Oh. Okumura Haru.

 **yeet** : wait srsly?

 **fists on wheels** : What’s the matter?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : shes got the same last name as that dude at the top of the phansites poll. coincidence?

 **super fluffy** : I think not

 **fists on wheels** : Enough with your references. Even if she was, we can’t pry.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : just sayin  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : even if shes a rich kid she didnt act like one

 **strawberry shortcake** : Yeah those girls at school who flaunt their money and shit?? Pass!!

 **super fluffy** : Begone thots

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : im a big advocate for treating girls right but I gotta admit they fuckin suck

 **graphic design is my passion** : Haru treated us all less like strangers and more like friends, actually. It was refreshing.

 **strawberry shortcake** : She was refreshing! We need to hang out again

 **fists on wheels** : During the chaperoning trips then. Haru could possibly be busy and I don’t want to intrude.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Well now that that’s settled...  
**strawberry shortcake** : TURTLES!!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : TURTLES!!!

 **super fluffy** : TURTLES!!!

 

**Hawaii: September 9, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**Japan: September 10, 2016 (Evening)**

  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : how rude would it be if i asked yusuke to come up to my room and be my ac  
  
**fists on wheels** : Definitely rude, Ryuji.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : damn  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I don’t know what you were expecting

 **super fluffy** : You should have a working AC Ryu

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : uh huh yeah TELL THAT TO MY FUCKING ROOMMATE WHO FUCKING TOOK IT APART

 **strawberry shortcake** : Whoa

 **yeet** : holy shit

 **super fluffy** : The fuck?

 **graphic design is my passion** : Goodness.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i kno right?!

 **fists on wheels** : You have to tell me who it is, Ryuji. Such actions can’t go unpunished.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : calm down class prez it aint that serious

 **strawberry shortcake** : But he dismantled your ac?????

 **graphic design is my passion** : You also complained about said air conditioner.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah but thats just bc there aint a workin ac in the room now  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : hes gonna put it back together at some point  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : he always does

 **yeet** : for real

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey every class has their nutjob hes 2Es nut

 **strawberry shortcake** : So like Akira

 **super fluffy** : Excuse m

 **strawberry shortcake** : Yes Akira you are 2D’s resident nutjob don’t deny it  
**strawberry shortcake** : You make lockpicks and bombs at your desk and despite doing something that should probably be illegal no one says anything about it  
**strawberry shortcake** : Also you think you’re slick hiding Morgana in your desk but everyone knows  
**strawberry shortcake** : No one wants to say anything tho bc they don’t want to be that person

 **super fluffy** : What the fuck I thought I was being cool and sneaky

 **fists on wheels** : You’re neither cool nor sneaky, Akira.

 **super fluffy** : :OOO  
**super fluffy** : My own advisor

 **yeet** : inaris cooler than u joker

 **super fluffy** : You’re just saying that because you’re dating him now

 **yeet** : isfbisfbisjdfosa

 **graphic design is my passion** : Thank you, Futaba. I think you’re cool as well.

 **yeet** : ...thanks yusuke

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ur cool to me

 **strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!!

 **super fluffy** : At least someone appreciates me

 **strawberry shortcake** : Nevermind you Akira but is that fiRST NAME BASIS FUTABA

 **yeet** : i call inari by his first name!!!!!

 **super fluffy** : Not usually though  
**super fluffy** : How cute

 **yeet** : hhhhhhhhhhh

 **Morganya** : guys you made futaba run to her bed.  
**Morganya** : she’s screaming into her pillow.  
**Morganya** : she says she hates all of you.

 **super fluffy** : Tell her we love her too

 **Morganya** : oh fuck she’s throwing things now.  
**Morganya** : watch the tail!  
**Morganya** : yeah yeah i’ll get your phone.

 **yeet** : fuck yall

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : she return

 **yeet** : inaris my best friend fuckers so i get to call him whatever i want

 **graphic design is my passion** : But I thought I was your boyfriend.

 **strawberry shortcake** : You can be Futaba’s boyfriend and best friend, Yusuke  
**strawberry shortcake** : Like how Shiho’s my best friend and my girlfriend

 **super fluffy** : You know you’re in a relationship to stay if your so is your friend as much as your lover

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : tru

 **fists on wheels** : ...Is this relationship advice?

 **super fluffy** : It wasn’t originally but I guess it is now

 **fists on wheels** : Hm.  
**fists on wheels** : This is like one of those songs you and Ryuji sang at his birthday party.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ur gonna hafta be more specific than that mako

 **super fluffy** : We sang a lot of songs together

 **fists on wheels** : This one.  
**fists on wheels** :  ryujisbirthday.mp3 

**strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!!! THAT ONE

 **super fluffy** : LUCKY I'M IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : LUCKY TO HAVE BEEN WHERE I HAVE BEEN

 **super fluffy** : LUCKY TO BE COMING HOME AGAIN

 **strawberry shortcake** : Holy shit is that you guys??

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : LUCKY WE'RE IN LOVE IN EVERY WAY

 **fists on wheels** : How are you singing so loudly?

 **yeet** : r they trying to serenading each other while texting the lyrics

 **super fluffy** : LUCKY TO HAVE STAYED WHERE WE HAVE STAYED

 **strawberry shortcake** : Hell yeah they are!!!! BELT IT OUT!!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : LUCKY TO BE COMING HOME SOMEDAY

 **strawberry shortcake** : YEAH!!!

 **fists on wheels** : You’re both so lucky neither of you are bad singers.

 **graphic design is my passion** : None of us are, I believe. Ryuji’s birthday party was quite enjoyable.

 **strawberry shortcake** : I can’t believe Sakamoto-san had a karaoke machine!!!

 **yeet** : birthday party?

 **fists on wheels** : Ryuji’s birthday was in July, so we went over to his house to have a birthday party.

 **graphic design is my passion** : The karaoke machine was quite ancient, but it still worked.

 **Morganya** : my scores sucked…

 **strawberry shortcake** : Well, I think the machine picked up your meows instead of your words, but you sounded great!

 **Morganya** : lady ann!

 **strawberry shortcake** : You know, if thieving doesn’t work out for us in the future, we could always be idols!!

 **fists on wheels** : Are you sure?

 **strawberry shortcake** : ...As long as Ryuji and Futaba don’t dance we could!

 **yeet** : tf?

 **Morganya** : futaba, you crab walked around the last time ann let us come over. I dance better than you and i’m a cat.

 **yeet** : yuuuuuuuuusuke!!! theyre bothering me

 **graphic design is my passion** : ...My apologies, but you aren’t that good at dancing, Futaba.

 **yeet** : even my own boo  
**yeet** : whoa thats weird to say

 **strawberry shortcake** : That’s soo cute

 **yeet** : sshuuuuush

 **strawberry shortcake** : Actually, I think I have a recording of all of us singing together. It was before we met you Futaba  
**strawberry shortcake** : lifewillchangeptvr.mp3

 **yeet** : ...  
**yeet** : what the fuck all of u sound like angels if u heard me sing i sound like a chicken

 **graphic design is my passion** : Futaba…

 **yeet** : no no no i see now that the arts truly arent for me  
**yeet** : inari u handle all that art shit ill be the smart one

 **graphic design is my passion** : If you wish it, though I would like to point out that I’m not exactly stupid.

 **yeet** : course u arent i wont any so of mine be as dumb as a rock u be smart and ill be smarter

 **graphic design is my passion** : Alright then. Where are Ryuji and Akira? They haven’t participated at all.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Still singing though I think they went to the windows

 **yeet** : do u got a recording

 **strawberry shortcake** : Who do you think I am?

 **yeet** : sweet

 **fists on wheels** : As much as I love their voices, they need to stop now.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : we ran outta shit to sing anyway and we got stopped

 **Morganya** : you’re back!

 **super fluffy** : Yeah people knocked on my door to ask me to stop but they also said I have a beautiful voice so there’s that

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : Some of the people that came up to my room said they would buy my single

 **strawberry shortcake** : Geez guys stop making history without any of us watching

 **super fluffy** : I’m just that charming Takamaki

 **strawberry shortcake** : You can catch these hands, Kurusu

 **super fluffy** : What’s that about Ryuji? Hell yes

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : omg

 **super fluffy** : Someone’s knocking hold up  
**super fluffy** : Okay that’s new

 **yeet** : wh?

 **super fluffy** : Some of the people came back and just gave me a business card and a wad of cash  
**super fluffy** : I think they want to buy my voice

 **fists on wheels** : Or recruit you.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : holy shit man same but this girl also tried to give me her number and as much as old me would have liked that new me is a taken man

 **super fluffy** : Imma fight her

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : nah dude she looked like she could step a hole into my body with her heels

 **yeet** : what kind of ppl are staying in ur hotel

 **fists on wheels** : I did hear that there was going to be an event later in the week. A music festival of sorts. I should be surprised there are people like that staying in this hotel, but I’m not.

 **graphic design is my passion** : What kind of hotel are you staying in?

 **fists on wheels** : A high end one, right near the beach. Principal Kobayakawa was the one who booked it for us. If our suspicions are correct in that he’s working for someone of higher status, he may have been pulling some strings to get us rooms.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : and thatd have to be a shitton of rooms yeah? bc we aint a small group

 **fists on wheels** : You’re correct.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Did Shujin even have enough to afford something like this?

 **fists on wheels** : Admittedly, we had just the right amount, but not enough for us to plan out our other activities. We had just enough for the trip there, the stay for all 10 days, and the trip back.

 **yeet** : but then ud have nothing to do

 **fists on wheels** : Only when we got a sudden influx of funds could we plan all our activities.

 **graphic design is my passion** : It coming from his employer could make the most amount of sense.

 **super fluffy** : Unless it came from the SO

 **fists on wheels** : I was thinking the same thing, but it can’t be. They’re an underground police organization. Who would condone funds used for research to get funneled into a trip for high schoolers?

 **strawberry shortcake** : Mitsuru-san didn’t look like that type of lady

 **super fluffy** : She isn’t

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : if i aint the principals boss it mightve been another of ur fake parents aki

 **super fluffy** : What makes you say that

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : i looked up some of those guys we met  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : risettes an idol we all know how much she likes akira and that shes loaded  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : naoto shirogane? the first detective prince? rich as fuck  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : u gotta be livin under a rock if u dont know the amagi inn in inaba  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : yosuke-san got internet fame and shit  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : and ur friends with feather pink

 **yeet** : fuckin what

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : if mitsuru-san aint the type to dump money for a school trip uve got five other people who could

 **super fluffy** : …  
**super fluffy** : You’re right

 **yeet** : fuckIN WHAT KURUSU UR FRIENDS WITH YUKARI TAKEBA

 **fists on wheels** : That’s only if Principal Kobayakawa’s boss doesn’t have a reason for helping Shujin like this. Do they want the teachers alone? Now that a portion of the student body is gone, will they have an easier time tracking down the Phantom Thieves?

 **super fluffy** : Who knows

 **yeet** : IM GONNA YEET U IN THE FUKCIN SUN WHO ELSE DO U KNO THAT I KNO AND OR LOVE

 **super fluffy** : Oh what’s that it’s time to sleep haha alright good night~!!!!!

 **yeet** : DONT EVEN TRY KURUSU I KNOW ITS NOT EVEN NINE OVER THERE

 

_ <“Yes, I know. I’ll return home as soon as the trip finishes.” _

_..._

_“I haven’t had the chance just yet. I don’t know if she’s actually here, Father.”_

_…_

_“Did you really? Am I allowed access to Niihau?”_

_…_

_“I don’t believe I know what kind of business trip this is. I know you want me to meet with Kirijo Mitsuru-san, but what do you want us to discuss?”_

_…_

_“A business deal? But Father, do you really need me to do so?”_

_…_

_“Yes, I am aware. Kirijo-san is not a stranger to show dislike of Okumura Foods.”_

_…_

_“I—Yes, I know, but—!”_

_…_

_“...A-Alright. I will do my best. The Kirijo Group would be a valuable asset indeed.”_

_…_

_“I understand. Goodbye, Father.”_

_*click* > _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sets** : None of you believe in peace and quiet, do you.
> 
>  **fists on wheels** : I once knew, but not anymore.
> 
> * * *
> 
> How many people actually want to see the Turtle outing? As well as some left out content? I am planning to make oneshots off of this universe...
> 
> And yes, I headcanon that all the Phantom Thieves can sing or at least have a nice sounding singing voice except Futaba.


	13. moonmoonmoonmoonmoonmoonmo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A tiny chapter. In comes the moon and something's up with Mitsuru. Also, there's lots of yelling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 13 was supposed to be like, 5 times longer but then I had to establish things and things were moving too quickly so this chapter's tiny. The next one makes up for it!

**Hawaii: September 10, 2016 (Midnight)**

**Japan: September 11, 2016 (Evening)**

 

**Sakura Futaba → Arisato Minato**

 

 **Sakura Futaba** : souji-san told me to message u for some reason…

 **Arisato Minato** : i assume you’ve landed in hawaii

 **Sakura Futaba** : a while ago actually but yeah

 **Arisato Minato** : follow the address i send you. those will be your accommodations

 **Sakura Futaba** : ok…  
 **Sakura Futaba** : this looks like a familiar hotel

 **Arisato Minato** : rise’s nice enough to move from the hotel to mitsuru-senpai’s property on niihau  
 **Arisato Minato** : unless you want to stay on niihau for whatever reason

 **Sakura Futaba** : kinda…

 **Arisato Minato** : ah yes the kosei students

 **Sakura Futaba** : shut up

 **Arisato Minato** : your romance is none of my business. if you want to stay on niihau, just tell me. yes or no

 **Sakura Futaba** : yes

 **Arisato Minato** : alright then  
 **Arisato Minato** : lucky for you rise hasn’t moved out of her room so you’ll be on niihau

 **Sakura Futaba** : hell yes!

 **Arisato Minato** : keep it pg child

 **Sakura Futaba** : youre not my dad

 **Arisato Minato** : but i’m one of akira’s fake ones so deal with it

 **Sakura Futaba** : damn

 **Arisato Minato** : get going. you’re going to face the hell that is jet lag soon.

 **Sakura Futaba** : im already dealing w it thanks  
 **Sakura Futaba** : i kno the place is on niihau but where exactly

 **Arisato Minato** : go to the hotel address i gave you. I’ll show you the rest of the way from there

 **Sakura Futaba** : wait a minute  
 **Sakura Futaba** : ur here?

  


**Hawaii: September 11, 2016 (Evening)**

**Japan: September 12, 2016 (Afternoon)**

 

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**super fluffy** : I’ve been meaning to do this

_super fluffy has added Mishima Yuuki to the chat!_

_Mishima Yuuki changed their name to mishimoon!_

**super fluffy** : Welcoming our dear informat Mishima to the group because finally

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : about time dude!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Welcome to the group!

 **mishimoon** : Hahaha, thanks for having me!  
**mishimoon** : I already said this to Akira, but I’m really sorry for what I was trying to do a few months ago. Trying to take advantage of you like that…

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey its all in the past

 **strawberry shortcake** : Yeah! And you changed yourself so we didn’t really even need to change your heart

 **super fluffy** : The main chat’s for field members only, but since you’re our eyes and ears on the phansite, we had to let you in here

 **mishimoon** : You guys have no idea how much this means to me!

 **strawberry shortcake** : no no we have a pretty good idea

 **mishimoon** : I won’t let you guys down! At least now I can contact all of you directly.

 **super fluffy** : There’s the one of many upsides to this choice  
**super fluffy** : The rest of the guys are offline right now sleeping or whatever the hell Futaba does when she’s not on the chat

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : its pretty damn quiet right now

 **mishimoon** : I could guess that Nijima-san is part of the Phantom Thieves, but who are the rest?

 **graphic design is my passion** : I have heard of you from Akira, but I don’t believe we’ve met before.

 **mishimoon** : Whoa! Who’re you?

 **graphic design is my passion** : Kitagawa Yusuke, a student at Kosei. I believe you would know me from the Madarame incident.

 **mishimoon** : You were his pupil, the one who was living with him still despite his plagiarism, right?

 **graphic design is my passion** : Yes.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yo yusuke u good talkin about this stuff

 **graphic design is my passion** : It is alright Ryuji, I have come to terms with what Madarame had done to me and to my fellow pupils. It doesn’t bother me as much anymore.

 **mishimoon** : Oh my God, was that out of line? I’m sorry!

 **graphic design is my passion** : Don’t fret, you were merely curious.

 **mishimoon** : Well, if I say something out of line, you guys have to tell me! I don’t want to be rude!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Calm down a bit Mishima, we aren’t gonna bite you!

 **super fluffy** : No matter what you do you aren’t gonna get kicked out unless you pull a stunt that could get one or all of us killed

 **mishimoon** : Σ(ﾟДﾟ|||) Of course I won’t!  
**mishimoon** : I’m dumb, but I’m not that dumb!  
**mishimoon** : Wait crap.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : MISHIMA

 **strawberry shortcake** : ARE THOSE SELF DEPRECATING THOUGHTS  
**strawberry shortcake** : Wait are you okay with hugs

 **mishimoon** : I think I can handle a few now.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Good AKIRA GET OVER THERE ARE HUG HIM

 **super fluffy** : Way ahead of you

 **strawberry shortcake** : IN THE HOUSE OF THE PHANTOM THIEVES MISHIMA YOU’RE A VALUABLE PERSON AND EVEN THOUGH YOU CAN BE A LITTLE OVERBEARING YOU’RE GREAT AND YOU GIVE GREAT INFO DON’T YOU DARE SAY ANYTHING LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : IVE LITERALLY MET U ONLY A HANDFUL OF TIMES BUT NO PHANTOM THIEFS GONNA LET YOU THINK UR A ZERO EVER

 **mishimoon** : You guys!

 **super fluffy** : Guys you made him cry

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : good!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Those better be tears of joy!

 **mishimoon** : They are!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : fUCKIN PERFECT

 **shihohoho** : wow i missed a lot.  
**shihohoho** : massive backread.

 **mishimoon** : Wait is that Shiho?!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Evening Shiho!

 **shihohoho** : morning ann!  
**shihohoho** : oh! yuuki!

 **mishimoon** : SHIHO!

 **shihohoho** : YUUKI!

 **mishimoon** : I MISS YOU!

 **shihohoho** : SO DO I!

 **strawberry shortcake** : gUYS STOP YOU’RE SO CUTE THE VOLLEYBALL NERDS REUNITED AT LAST

 **shihohoho** : about time akira!

 **super fluffy** : Shut up

 **strawberry shortcake** : wHAT WAS THAT KURUSU

 **mishimoon** : It’s been a while, Shiho!

 **super fluffy** : I SAID SHUT UP TAKAMAKI

 **shihohoho** : sure has! i never got your chat id!

 **strawberry shortcake** : fUCKIN SQUARE UP BOI

 **mishimoon** : Really? But now that we’re in the same chat, we can dm each other!

 **strawberry shortcake** : I WILL DEFEND THE HONOR OF MY GIRLFRIEND TILL THE END OF MY DAYS

 **shihohoho** : do you still play volleyball?

 **super fluffy** : MEET ME IN THE FUCKING PIT TAKAMAKI

 **mishimoon** : Not as much. Just casually mostly. But I still like watching matches!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Where’s the pit? wE’RE IN HAWAII

 **shihohoho** : me too! i’ve got an important job to do, so i don’t have a lot of free time anymore.

 **super fluffy** : THERE’S GOTTA BE A PIT WE COULD FIGHT IN ON MOLOKA’I AND LANAI

 **mishimoon** : Ooooh you got a job?

 **strawberry shortcake** : LOOK IT UP

 **shihohoho** : yep! a part time job!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : guys holy shit as much as i love ur insanity my eyes r bleeding  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ur separate convos r killin me

 **super fluffy** : SHIT IM SORRY RYU

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : salright babe

 **fists on wheels** : What in the name of all that is good and holy are you all doing?

 **super fluffy** : SHIT SCATTER

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : night bitches

 **strawberry shortcake** : WE’RE GONNA LOOK FOR THAT PIT AKIRA

 **shihohoho** : good morning makoto-san!

 **fists on wheels** : Hello Shiho.

 **mishimoon** : Hi Nijima-san!

 **fists on wheels** : Hello to you too, Mishima-kun. Although you should be sleeping.

 **mishimoon** : Hehehe…

 **fists on wheels** : We’ll do proper introductions when we wake up. I’ll see you in the morning, Mishima-kun.

 **mishimoon** : Yes! Good night, Nijima-senpai!

* * *

The phone Mitsuru is holding is slammed onto her desk with the force of a comet. Her face momentarily breaks its mask as she snarls at her phone. _That damned man!_

Whirling around on her chair, she faces the window and hopes the light beaming from behind the curtains can collected the shattered remains of her good mood. Hopefully her phone still has some life left in it, but but how her temper is flaring and the frost seeping out under her fingers doesn’t stop, that phone will have join the rest who have been broken under her anger. Her secretary squeaks from behind her.

“Mi-Mitsuru-san?” he stammers, clutching the folders in his hands for dear life. Mitsuru vents out harshly and shakes her head, turning forward on her chair once more. Calm down. Irrational actions won’t get you anywhere. Reaching out for her phone, she feels just a little better seeing that it’s neither broken nor dead, still crystal clear and perfect. Hm, the technicians will be proud of that at least.

“Leave those on my desk. I’ll get to them later after I finish this,” she instructs her secretary. The man says something too jumbed to be Japanese, but he drops them off in the neatest pile he can make before leaving as quickly as he can. Poor man, getting exposed to one of her tempers. Perhaps she should give him something for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Mitsuru goes into her contacts before picking out a particular someone’s number. She stands and walks around her chair, peering through the white window curtains at the busy street. The other person picks up.

“I don’t mean to bother you at such an inconvenient time, but seems like we have a problem on our hands.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't look this over I had to rush to edit this haaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
> 
>  
> 
> [HEY Y'ALL THERE'S A DISCORD SERVER NOW HOP ON OVER IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT STUFF TO MY SOCIALLY AWKWARD SELF](https://discord.gg/cEyYmFA)


	14. the universe on the sand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We start at Moloka'i, then at Lanai. From coconuts to the 21st looking for the the 3rd. Also, things get a little serious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> READ CHAPTER 13 IF YOU HAVEN'T YET. AND YES, IF YOU'VE ALREADY READ 13, THIS IS A NEW CHAPTER TO READ, AS EVIDENT BY ITS LENGTH.
> 
> The other half of the double update! I had to post 13 in a rush, so here's the rest of it, aka chapter 14!
> 
> ...Chapters like this give me a really hard time. I hope what's going on is making sense, because some plot points had to be changed at the very last minute to fit with future plans.

**Hawaii: September 12, 2016 (Noon)**

**Japan: September 13, 2016 (Morning)**

 

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : HELLO BITCHES COCONUT  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : phantomcoconut.jpeg

 **Sets** : This is not what I expected when I decided to check my phone this morning.

 **super fluffy** : SOUJI-SENPAI WOULD YOU APPRECIATE A COCONUT

 **Sets** : Is it edible?

 **super fluffy** : NO BUT ALL OF THE PHANTOM THIEVES DREW ON IT

 **Sets** : How cute. Sure.

 **super fluffy** : SWEET

 **shihohoho** : whoa what’s happening?

 **strawberry shortcake** : There’s this super cool service on Moloka’i where we could send coconuts to people around the world!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : its free too! the only thing u have to pay for is shipping!

 **strawberry shortcake** : Can I send you one, Shiho

 **shihohoho** : of course!

 **strawberry shortcake** : LIT

 **fists on wheels** : I’m thinking of sending a coconut to Sis.

 **super fluffy** : DO IT

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : DO IT MAKO

 **Sets** : How funny do you think will it be if you sent it without any explanation?

 **fists on wheels** : Okay guys, I’m not that much of a douche.

 **strawberry shortcake** : But are you going to send one

 **fists on wheels** : Of course.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : HELL YEAH  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : IM SENDING ONE TO MY MOM

 **super fluffy** : Should I send one to my dad

 **shihohoho** : you should!

 **super fluffy** : Imma do it.

 **Sets** : Izanagi above, how much money do you children have?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : we’re mooching off the money we got from mementos

 **super fluffy** : Did you really think we wouldn’t save for a 10 day trip in Hawaii you trippin

 **shihohoho** : is mementos one of those places in the metaverse?

 **graphic design is my passion** : Indeed it is. It is the place that represents desire. Distorted desires, I presume.

 **super fluffy** : And there are a bunch of Shadows with distorted desires that if you confuse them they dispense a shitton of money and make us fucKIN RICH

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : week long raids in mementos finally paid off

 **strawberry shortcake** : Not really raids, more like 6 hour car drives where everyone is screaming Last Surprise until we crash into a Shadow and haggle it for all of its cash

 **super fluffy** : Yeah that

 **Sets** : If only I had that when I was young.  
**Sets** : I had to do jobs.

 **super fluffy** : Souji-senpai, you’re literally a history teacher in Tokyo and a member of the Shadow Operatives.

 **Sets** : I had to do jobs as a teenager.

 **super fluffy** : I understand

 **mishimoon** : Shadow Operatives?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : thats a can of worms i dont wanna deal w right now only COCONUTS

 **super fluffy** : Shiho?

 **shihohoho** : got you covered.

 **super fluffy** : Thanks

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : news update ann and akira r payin for their coconuts but im already done so its just me here

 **shihohoho** : coconuts plural?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yep  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : aki says hes sendin one to everyone he knos

 **mishimoon** : Doesn't Akira know like half of Tokyo or something?

 **Sets** : ...Exactly how much money did you get from Mementos?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : aki didnt say details but i kno hes got more than enough to buy my house

 **super fluffy** : I HAVE ENOUGH TO BUY ANN’S HOUSE ACTUALLY BUT DETAILS DETAILS

 **Sets** : You damn rich kid.

* * *

 **yeet** : sup nerds im back

 **fists on wheels** : Welcome back, Futaba.

 **yeet** : as much as i like u mako i wasnt expecting u to reply wheres asshat and his pals

 **fists on wheels** : Sleeping.

 **yeet** : u went back already

 **fists on wheels** : We’re on Lanai right now. Just resting on the beach.

 **yeet** : whys the nerd sleeping i thought hed be burying inari in sand and giving him sand boobs

 **fists on wheels** : He did and I’m sure he’ll send the pictures on the group chat, but he, Ann, Ryuji, and Yusuke all tired out. They’re sleeping under one of the trees.

 **yeet** : rlly? pic

 **fists on wheels** : sleepingthieves.jpeg

 **shihohoho** : the next time i go to tokyo, i’m thanking you in person, makoto-san.

 **yeet** : saved and is now my lock screen thanks for doing the lords work mako

 **fists on wheels** : I’m happy to help.

 **yeet** : so r u watching the nerds or r u hangin w ur lady

 **fists on wheels** : Futaba, it’s not like that.

 **yeet** : surejan.png

 **shihohoho** : you should hang out with her while you have the chance!

 **fists on wheels** : And who says I’m not?

 **shihohoho** : :OOOOOOOO

 **yeet** : O SHIT QUEEN YES GET IT ON ヽ(＾Д＾)ﾉ

 **shihohoho** : stop texting us and go talk with her! wait, did we interrupt something?

 **fists on wheels** : No, Haru is getting drinks, so neither of you interrupted anything.  
**fists on wheels** : She’s back; I’ll talk to you later.

 **shihohoho** : have fun!

 

“They’re at Lanai right now! At one of the beaches!” Futaba shouts over the roar of the speedboat she’s in, her head turned a little in case the person who’s manning the thing can’t hear her.

“Got it!” The strange man that is Mochizuki Ryoji grins like he’s more creepypasta serial killer than a normal man when the boat turns and her hands grip like vices around the speedboat’s rails.

Minato looks like this was more like a languid ride on a gondola than a one way trip to becoming a flying saucer over the deep blue seas. “If you break Mitsuru-senpai’s speed boat again, she’s going to snap you in half over her leg,” he says, barely loud enough for anyone to hear him.

“And I don’t doubt that she will! So let’s make sure this boat gets back to Niihau in one piece, alright?!” Nodding, Futaba looks back to the rapidly approaching island (maybe Lanai. Probably Lanai. Should be Lanai) over the horizon while Ryoji says something she can’t hear and doesn’t really care for hearing because land was approaching and her skill set coming to Hawaii was severely lacking in the Ride a Boat Going as Fast as a Car skill of her Seafaring skill tree.

“Oooooh, this side quest better be worth it!” she shrieks when the boat lurches over a small wave and flies for a good view seconds before touching water again. There’s no safe zone on this hell of a ride, but she’s had enough experience in Donkey Kong games and Kirby 64 to deal with streamlined river jumpers, even if this one doesn’t want to follow the rules.

But then again, real life doesn’t follow game rules, a fact the boat not so gently decides to reminder her of with another wave sends them all bouncing again.

“Where’re you gonna land?!” Futaba shouts, looking at Ryoji and Minato. There aren’t any ports or wooden bridges jutting over the edges of the sandy shore. Ryoji laughs. Or is that a snort?

“Anywhere we want!” he hollers. They bounce again and water flies from the ocean and like a goblin out for vengeance it crashes into Ryoji’s face and makes him squeal.

“There are designated places, but we just can’t see it from here,” Minato says. He pulls out a pair of binoculars from the magical inventory located in his shorts and throws it over to her. Catching the black object with the ease of a 4 in Proficiency, Futaba whirls around to peek at the shore of Lanai.

Small people dot the sandy beaches, some splashing around in the waves, others meandering near the trees for some much needed shade from the giant glowing shitstain in the sky. Futaba spots a small crowd (can’t tell specific details; too blurry) waving at them. There seems to be just one huge crowd split off into different parts of the beach, no doubt the group of students the three of them were looking for. And—oh, would you look at that.

The familiar flare of Johanna’s heat meets Necronomicon’s mental outreach from the inside of Futaba’s head. Her range is as shit as ever, but Johanna’s nuclear warhead of a power is impressed in her head from the amount of times she would gawk at Queen’s explosive attacks from Necronomicon. “The nerds are over there!” she calls and Ryoji says something back, but she can’t hear him before they veer around the side of beach to another part of the island.

* * *

“Stay here and stay out of sight, alright?” Minato asks the small Jack Frost teetering in front of him, kicking the sand playfully under his boots. Jack Frost nods, his grin wide as the bells around his collar jingle. “If anyone tries to take the boat, you know what to do.”

“No problem, hee-ho!” the Jack Frost squeaks, saluting. “Will Ryoj-hee mind it if the boat is covered in frost, ho?”

“As so long as you don’t break it, I think anything goes.” With that, the Persona jumps into the speedboat as Minato turns to the waiting Ryoji and Sakura Futaba.

The small Hermit looks nervous but excited, her fingers twiddling as she relentlessly adjusts the small bag slung over her shoulder. While she looks as uncomfortable in her two piece as Minato does under the Hawaiian sun, her eyes look similar to Akira’s when he’s on a mission he’s determined to finish. Minato strolls over to them, pulling his open sweater closer around his body. Ryoji insisted that he go to Lanai like it was more like a beach outing than an assignment given by Mitsuru-senpai and the damn man knows he can’t ignore his puppy eyes for the life of him, so here he is: mildly uncomfortable in his swimming shorts, but still motivated to get the job done.

As if sensing his discomfort (which he probably did), Ryoji reaches over and tucks Minato against his side. Even if Ryoji’s yellow scarf (the thing’s had endless repairs courtesy of Kanji) keeps flapping in his face, he feels the most comfortable like this than anywhere else.

“Cute,” Sakura comments from the side as the three of them begin walking towards what is definitely teenagers shrieking. “So, you guys together for long?”

“If you count long as 20 years,” Ryoji chuckles. Sakura looks confused at first, but then her eyes light up like lightbulbs.

“Oh right! The whole Death vessel thing, right?” she asks. Minato nods and she snorts. “So are you soulmates or something?” Humming, Ryoji adjusting his hand so it falls around Minato’s waist casually. He’s long grown used to his casual affection that it doesn’t bother him in public anymore.

“In a way. Harboring Death inside him did change him. He is no longer completely human, but then again, neither am I.” Futaba tuts.

“That is true, but there’s something more to him that neither of you are telling me.” Minato’s feet keep moving but he internally stills. Ryoji’s gone rigid beside him. Futaba continues. “You don’t have to say anything. I can tell because I’m the navigator and all, but whatever’s going on is gonna have to come out to the light eventually.”

It doesn’t take that long to reach their destination; they didn’t park that far from the beach and you can’t be a Persona user without getting used to running around in circles chasing Shadows before they see—

Sakura gasps and Ryoji’s throat makes this weird squeaking noise that Minato barely comprehends when he sees the Phantom Thieves, or most of them at least, all sleeping soundly on a large striped beach blanket. The trees overhead do a great job giving shade, but some streaks of light land on the sleeping teenagers like small spotlights. Both Akira and Sakamoto are splayed all over each other, legs overlapping while they sleep with Akira smothered against Sakamoto’s side. Takamaki and Kitagawa are on either side of them, Kitagawa’s head turned in a way that his face almost reaches Sakamoto’s arm and Takamaki attempting to spoon Sakamoto unconsciously. All in all, Minato realizes this is probably the cutest thing he’s ever seen.

“II think I can die happy now.” Sakura sounds like she found the answers to enlightenment before she whips out her phone and takes a lot more photos that her phone memory should be able to hold. Hm. He never knows with Hermits. Though Toriumi-sensei is vastly different than Sakura…

Minato walks over to the sleeping children (and really, they are children) and sits next to Kitagawa. Ryoji had walked up to Sakura and asked her for pictures since her phone quality is probably better than his potato of a phone as the Universe closes his eyes and feels.

Akira’s overwhelming power is always the first thing he’s able to sense around the Phantom Thieves, ever since his visit to the SO Headquarters back in August. His darkness is littered with other elements; streaks of lightning flare as fire wisps burn. Burning light chars as winds howl. Holy healing light mixes with the chill of ice and the pulse of psi. The blessed with the cursed. He feels so unlike when he first left, when all he had was the familiar dull hum of a normal human with potential. Now he carried what Minato and Souji carried in their hearts: the presence of a Wild Card.

Of course, the rest of the Phantom Thieves carried a similar sort of presence, but much weaker and limited to their element. But even when they weren't awake to fuel their powers did Minato feel the differences between them and the elemental users of the Shadow Operatives. Sakamoto’s electricity was chaotic and fueled with loud resolve, much different than Souji’s, which crackled with quiet power under the rest of his elements and Akihiko’s, which was reigned in with much needed control. His own fire, quietly burning under all his power couldn’t be mistaken for Ann’s smoldering passion, Junpei’s blazing drive, or Yukiko’s graceful flame.

Hm, imagine if the Phantom Thieves learned to cultivate that power…

“Futaba?!” Minato slowly open his eyes when he feels the unfamiliar burn of a Nuclear element walk up to them. He blinks at Niijima Makoto’s surprised gape. Hm, too comfortable under this tree. Maybe he’ll stay under for a little bit. He couldn’t get any rest on a speed boat, after all.

“Tis I!” Sakura does this whole Sendai pose thing that would make Ken proud. Niijima looks flabbergasted.

“But aren’t you supposed to be in Tokyo?” she asks, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Does it look like I am? ‘Cause lemme tell you, I did not expect to be whisked off to Hawaii because of fluffy over here!” Akira doesn’t move at all when Sakura points at him or when she shouts. He taught him well. Niijima, unsure and still confused, glances to Ryoji, who is definitely not trying to frame the perfect picture with Minato and the sleeping Phantom Thieves. Totally not.

Ryoji doesn’t even turn around to address Niijima. “Mitsuru-senpai’s the big mastermind behind all this,” he says before grinning at taking the perfect picture. He tucks his phone inside his shorts before turning. “Akira’s birthday and all.”

“That can’t be it,” she replies, disbelieving. Ryoji tuts, his arms on his hips.

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, silly girl, but you’re not privy to that as much as we aren’t privy to your undergoings as the Phantom Thieves,” he replies. She doesn’t look satisfied with that answer, but Minato knows she knows he’s right.

Sakura had wandered over to Kitagawa while Niijima and Ryoji were talking to stare at him. Minato peers at her, wondering what she would do.

Pinching his nose was the last thing he expected.

Long limbs immediately start flailing like an octopus as the quietly brewing chill of his Persona spikes violently into a freezing point. Minato involuntarily shivers. He still had fire as a core element; ice was never one of his favorites.

Kitagawa sputters and openly gapes. “Fu-Futaba?” In his mad flail, he knocks his hand into Sakamoto’s face and his leg into Akira’s leg. Minato can only watch when the cuddle pile abruptly becomes a mess of cluttered limbs and complaining teenagers. Smirking, he says nothing as he props his arms on his knees.

“Yusuke, what the hell?!” complains Sakamoto, groaning. He rolls over on the other side, but crushes Takamaki awake.

“Ugh, Ryuji, roll over, you’re squishing me!” she shouts before hitting his arm.

“Geez, I didn’t mean to give you a rude wake up call, Yusuke’s the one who hit me!”

“My apologies, I was just surprised.” Kitagawa looks up at Sakura, who grins down at him. Offering a hand, he takes it and she pulls him up on his feet with all the strength she can muster. Admittedly, it’s not a lot, but Minato could tell she’s trying her hardest. Even if she needed just a tiny Garu to get him to lift up. “Oh, that was an unexpected draft.” Minato ignores Ryoji’s pointed smirk; no one else needed to know.

“Is it morning already?” Akira’s sleepy mumble comes from the side of Sakamoto’s rib as if he isn’t bothered by his boyfriend and Takamaki squabbling.

“It’s still afternoon, actually,” Minato utters lowly as he looks at his charge. It takes a while for Akira to realise who spoke, but Minato chalks it up to muddled thoughts after waking up than anything else.

Akira bolts up from Sakamoto’s side to stare at his senpai in shock. Minato hums. He reaches over and ruffles Akira’s hair, to which the teenager whines.

“Looks like your rats nest of hair still doesn’t do you any favors, does it,” he quips, shaking out the sand that had gotten in his hair.

“Minato-senpai! What are you doing here?” he asks, pulling Minato’s hand from his head m. At this point, Akira had sat up with Sakamoto and Takamaki still talking in the background, but about their interrupted dreams (and Minato didn’t want to hear any of it). Might as well cut his charge some slack if they were ever going to go anywhere.

“I’ve got business. Ryoji and I were just dropping off your friend here.” At the word friend, Akira perks up before turning to see Kitagawa and Sakura—actually Minato didn’t know what they were doing. Was she trying to suplex him? If she was, she was way too short for something like that.

Akira chokes out a disbelieving laugh. “Futaba?” Sakura pauses in her valiant attempt to flip Kitagawa over her shoulder and grins broadly at Akira.

“Hi Aki!” Apparently that broke some magic spell because both Sakamoto and Takamaki finally realize there’s someone new and familiar and all three of them bolt up and run to her like they haven’t seen her in weeks. Which they haven’t, but it’s more days than weeks. Though has it really been that long they keep in constant contact? Hm, this analogy was escaping him.

“You rested well enough?” Minato looks up at his husband, who smiles at him brilliantly. And wow, did he just look downright angelic with the beams of sunlight hitting him just right, if Minato didn’t have a poker face, he just might cry. He looks back down and pushes himself on his feet. His sweater fell lose around his arms while he was sitting down, so he pulls it back up around him.

“Better than I could have on the speedboat,” he answers and Ryoji chuckles.

“We didn’t have to take the speedboat, you know,” he notes. Minato shakes his head. The conversation the kids are having fly way over his head, but it looks like they’re having fun.

“But you wanted to, and it’s not like we go to Hawaii everyday,” he replies, but both of them knew he had ulterior motives. They had a long time to be together; they didn’t have to try new things right away.

Minato lowers his head. _No. Stop it._ Ryoji hugs him against his side and with a low voice, he whispers, “Shush, I know, dearest, you don’t have to say why.” Neither of them liked to be reminded of their eternal time compared to that of their friends.

Thank the gods for Akira. “Hey, Minato-senpai, you said you had business so…?” He looks at him inquisitively and Minato squashes down any dark thoughts as much as possible. He’s in Hawaii. He doesn’t need that right now. He clears his throat and Ryoji lets him go, but locks their hands together instead.

“Yes, I need to talk to one of the students going on this trip. Okumura Haru.” Immediately, all the Thieves go rigid. Their latent energy spikes into something not hostile, but panicked and worried. Interesting. Feeling a squeeze of his hand, Ryoji can tell too. Minato purses his lips. “She isn’t in trouble or anything, I just need to talk to her because of her father.”

“Her father?” Sakura pipes up, head tilted.

“Her father is a businessman, trying to get into the good graces of Mitsuru-senpai. There’s an arrangement they set up that I need to go over with her.” The nervous energy spikes. Were they really this scared for her? Or did they… Minato quirks an eyebrow. “Did you happen to make friends with her?” Almost all of them flinch. Bingo.

“It’s fine, everyone.” All of them gasp in alarm. From behind the Phantom Thieves, Okumura Haru walks up to them. She looks calm, but there is an edge of nervousness in the way her arms are locked to her sides. “I couldn’t help but notice everyone gathered here, so I apologize if I heard something I wasn’t meant to hear…” she says quietly.

“N-No, you didn’t do anything bad!” Niijima exclaims but Okumura still looks on edge. She walks up to Minato; her posture stiffens, as if steeling herself. Was she expecting him to bite her or something?

“If we could speak in private…?” Okumura glances to her side, for since the Phantom Thieves are at her back she can't gesture to them directly, but Minato knows what she means. He glances at Ryoji and their eyes meet. Good to know his husband knew what he was thinking. Wordlessly, he jerks his head in the opposite direction for Okumura to follow him.

It takes them a while, but eventually they find a clearing away from all the others. The Phantom Thieves won’t follow after, not with Ryoji blocking the way.

All at once, the nervousness and jitters fade away, replaced with a calm and quiet poise similar to what Mitsuru carries. Well then, she was definitely someone who grew up with money. “Thank you. I didn’t want them to get involved,” she states with a slight bow of her head.

Minato nods. “Business has to be dealt with outside of friend groups. I understand.” Haru peers up at him.

“Who are you exactly?” she asks. Minato bows his head.

“I’m one of Mitsuru Kirijo’s subordinates, Arisato Minato,” he replies. “She entrusted me to talk to you about the business deal.”

“Father said he and Kirijo-san discussed a partnership between Okumura Foods and the Kirijo Group over the phone. I was supposed to meet her in person.”

“Well, there are some… problems about that,” Minato sighs, shaking his head. Damn that Kunikazu. Okumura shifts the weight on her feet. “I hope you don’t mind my language, but your father is really damn desperate, isn’t he.”

“I… don’t know what you mean.” Rolling his eyes, he crosses his arms and stares at her.

“Okumura-san, please, I’m not stupid. It’s no secret amongst us that your father isn’t exactly the most liked in the industry. One too many of his opponents disappeared from illness. It’s too convenient.” Her face pinches for a split second. She knows what he’s talking about.

“I…”

“I’m not accusing you,” he intones, gentler than he spoke before. “but he isn’t in Mitsuru-senpai’s good graces for a reason.” Okumura nods like she understands, which she probably does if she grew up under Kunikazu’s thumb.

“Does that mean that the business deal is going to be called off?” she asks, “Because it certainly sounds like it.” And here was the issue.

“No, it’s not. Your father backed us into a corner.” Ugh, admitting it made him want to cringe. Surprised, Okumura’s poker face breaks into intrigue.

“Why is that?”

“Your father said he had made an arrangement with Mitsuru to meet for a business deal here, but it’s really not as simple as that. I’m sure your father told you of the business party that was taking place on the island?”

“Yes, he said that he had RSVP’d for it.”

“Well, that father of yours stuck his nose into where it didn’t belong.” Okumura flinches. She tightens her fists. Minato doesn’t doubt that she had the capability to sock him the nose, so he continues before she has the chance to. He sighs. “The business party thing was a ruse. It’s actually a birthday party, for one of our family who’s spending his time here in Hawaii.” Her hand loosens. Shock is written on her face before it crumbles. “Your father had heard about it and threatened to leak it to the media if she didn’t abide to meeting for a deal. None of us like media coverage and none of us wanted to expose our family member since he’s young and a minor, so she agreed to what he wanted.”

Silence. Minato didn’t like corrupted companies for lots of reasons and usually, dealing with threats from CEOs with a stick up their ass was a no brainer, but if someone found out about Akira, they would be screwed. Unlike the rest of them, he was a minor, under probation for a crime he didn’t commit as well as the Leader of the Phantom Thieves. If he gained media attention for being directly related to the Kirijo Group, there was no telling what that would do for the Phantom Thieves and how he and the company would be treated. Not to mention what they would do if they looked into his family...

“I’m sorry,” mutters Okumura softly with her head bowed down. Minato’s eyebrow shoots up.

“What are you apologizing for? You don’t need to do that.”

“But my father involved himself in a personal matter! I know what he’s doing is for the sake of the company, but it doesn’t feel right!” He huffs. This girl is very different from her father, that’s for sure.

“Hey, your father should be apologizing, not you. Stop doing things for your father like this. You’re your own person. You don’t have to keep kissing up to his whims.” She falls silent again, but pulls herself up from her bow. “Now then, about that RSVP of his…”

 

**Hawaii: September 12, 2016 (Evening)**

**Japan: September 13, 2016 (Afternoon)**

 

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**fists on wheels** : If Minato-san harmed Haru in anyway, I’m going to kill him.

 **super fluffy** : Please don’t

 **strawberry shortcake** : Has Haru said anything?

 **fists on wheels** : We spoke for a little bit on our way back, but she didn’t tell me about anything.

 **graphic design is my passion** : Should we really expect her to provide us with information? As much as we are friends now, we all became acquainted with her during this trip. She is not entitled to tell us anything if it pertains to her family.

 **fists on wheels** : I don’t want to admit it, but you’re right.  
**fists on wheels** : I’m just worried.

 **super fluffy** : We all are

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah even tho we just met like a few days ago she already feels like a part of the group or smth

 **strawberry shortcake** : I agree!!

 **Morganya** : seems like you guys had fun.

 **super fluffy** : Hey Morgana

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : wait if tabas here then wherere u

 **Morganya** : in the manor. once i heard ryoji-san talks about speedboats, i ran away as fast as i could.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : cant handle a little water mona

 **Morganya** : well sure IF WE WEREN’T RIDING ON A SPEEDBOAT.

 **graphic design is my passion** : We face many more dangers in the Metaverse that are more frightening than a speedboat, Morgana.

 **Morganya** : shut up, fox.

 **graphic design is my passion** : How rude.

 **super fluffy** : Speaking of rude foxes I’ve got to address the elephant in the room  
**super fluffy** : Futaba and Yusuke both at Niihau

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : be safe kids

 **strawberry shortcake** : Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!

 **super fluffy** : If I see something on Futaba’s neck I’m snapping you in half Yusuke

 **yeet** : guys pls u really think inari and i would do that sorta thing  
**yeet** : sounds too  
**yeet** : gross

 **graphic design is my passion** : I have to agree. While I am entranced by Futaba’s beauty and her drive for her passion, engaging in anything beyond cuddling sounds much too daring and might I say, disgusting.

 **yeet** : but cuddles all the way

 **graphic design is my passion** : Yes, cuddles all the way I suppose.

 **yeet** : also ur embarrassing inari

 **graphic design is my passion** : I am merely complimenting you.

 **super fluffy** : Have fun with your cuddling you two

 **yeet** : im gonna sneak into inaris room and we’re gonna binge watch some disney movies because hes not a man of culture if he hasnt see beauty and the beast

 **fists on wheels** : Akira, I know what you’re thinking. Don’t do it.

 **super fluffy** : Why Queen why

 **fists on wheels** : Because I said so. Now go to bed everyone. We’ll see what happens with Haru tomorrow.

 **yeet** : and i have to talk to yall about smth but it can wait till tomorrow theres movies to catch

 **super fluffy** : Night nut jobs

 

**Okumura Haru — > Niijima Makoto**

**Okumura Haru** : makoto?

 **Niijima Makoto** : Haru? It’s late.

 **Okumura Haru** : i hope i haven’t woken you up with this.

 **Niijima Makoto** : No, it’s fine. Did you need something?

 **Okumura Haru** : do you remember what happened earlier? with arisato-san? i hope you don’t mind me asking, but do you know him?

 **Niijima Makoto** : Yes I do. Minato-san is one of Akira’s caretakers from his hometown. He knows both him and his husband, the one with the scarf. Is there any particular reason you’re asking?

 **Okumura Haru** : he told me i could meet with kirijo-san as long as i get an invitation from kurusu-kun for the party happening on the 15th.

 **Niijima Makoto** : What party?

 **Okumura Haru** : oh, did you not know? i suppose the way arisato-san said it, it sounded like it was supposed to be a secret…  
 **Okumura Haru** : let me fill you in then.

 

**Niijima Makoto — > Kurusu Akira**

**Niijima Makoto** : Random question: if you were having a birthday party, would you invite Haru?

 **Kurusu Akira** : Yeah  
 **Kurusu Akira** : She’s cool I like her and you like her so

 **Niijima Makoto** : That’s all I need. Thanks.

 **Kurusu Akira** : ?????

 

**Okumura Haru — > **Niijima Makoto****

**Niijima Makoto** : You have the all-clear, Haru.

 **Okumura Haru** : splendid! thank you, makoto. i will see you tomorrow then. i must get my dress ready for the occasion.

 **Niijima Makoto** : Wait a minute, dress?

 

**Hawaii: September 13, 2016 (Morning)**

**Japan: September 14, 2016 (Early Morning)**

 

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHY I JUST GOT A FANCY ASS INVITATION IN MY EMAIL ABOUT AKIRA’S BIRTHDAY PARTY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...No offense, but I'm never writing Futaba again. She's surprisingly hard to write.
> 
> From the summary, 21st and 3rd refer to arcana. 21st is the World/the Universe, 3rd is Empress.
> 
> There is actually supposed to be a gap chapter between 14 and Akira's birthday, but I feel like they've been in Hawaii for too long. What's your opinion guys? Wanna get a chat chapter before the big one that is Akira's birthday party and the smorgasbord of stuff that's going to be going down, or go directly into Akira's birthday? If I do write the chat chapter, there'll be more worldbuilding and less plot (also more Mishima and Shiho!)
> 
> ...Hm, I'm might write the chat chapter, it'll flow better since we're not skipping a day but the time spent in Hawaii's gonna get longer...
> 
> I feel like there are 50 billion spelling errors and wrong words. NO BETA WE DIE LIKE MEN.


	15. PIT SPOTTED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot of things that happen here. Invitations, talking about the party, and Akira gets bodied. Also, we get some serious stuff going on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TAKE IT I HOPE YOU LIKE THE DIFFERENT FORMAT BC I'M CHANGING ALL THE CHAPTERS TO BE LIKE IT. REPEATED MESSAGES FROM ONE PERSON WILL NOW BE CLUMPED TOGETHER.
> 
> Also dank.mp3 is a link. ;)

  **Hawaii: September 13, 2016 (Morning)**

**Japan: September 14, 2016 (Early Morning)**

 

**— > Enter Here For Gays and Thieving <—**

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : CRISIS ALERT CRISIS ALERT CRISIS ALERT  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : WAKE THE FUCK UP

 **mishimoon** : Morning sakamoto!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : AS MUCH AS I APPRECIATE U I DONT NEED U RIGHT NOW DONT TAKE THAT TOO SERIOUSLY I JUST NEED LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE RIGHT NOW

 **mishimoon** : Kurusu’s kind of dead on the floor.

 **mishimoon** : And I just woke up.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : FUCK  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : @everyone IS ANYONE ELSE HERE IN MY TIME OF NEED

 **shihohoho** : what the fuck is up, you fucking shitstain.  
**shihohoho** : it’s 3 in the morning.  
**shihohoho** : i don’t want to deal with your shit.

 **mishimoon** : oH CRAP

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : SCARY SHIHO PLS GO BACK TO SLEEP IM SORRY FOR DISTURBING U

 **shihohoho** : guess again fuckface there’s a punching bag in the so’s gym with your name on it now.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : SHITTTTTTTTTT

 **shihohoho** : brb.

 **mishimoon** : Scary shiho’s a delight as ever, i guess.  
**mishimoon** : Do you need me to wake Kurusu up or…?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : its fine mishima  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : its tIME TO GO TO DRASTIC MEASURES  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : TIME FOR OPERATION 4206

 **mishimoon** : ?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : tell my mom i love her and tell aki that he has permission to take my manga collection

 **mishimoon** : ?????!!!!!!  
**mishimoon** : Sakamoto?  
**mishimoon** : Sakamoto??!!  
**mishimoon** : Hey i’m serious, what happened?!  
**mishimoon** : This isn’t funny!

 **graphic design is my passion** : Ryuji doesn’t exist anymore.  
**graphic design is my passion** : He has been consumed by the raging flames of god and satan for his sins and misgivings.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Pardon me as I find something to freeze and shatter as best I can with my bare hands.

 **mishimoon** : ????!?!?!?!???????!?!?!?!?

 **strawberry shortcake** : Omg it’s not that serious Yusuke

 **yeet** : hahaha i kno right  
**yeet** : i gotta thank u ryuji  
**yeet** : what a beautiful tune

 **graphic design is my passion** : Disgusting.

 **yeet** : alshkdfsdjafhsldlfj he just left the room omfg

 **super fluffy** : I’m awake I’m awake  
**super fluffy** : Jesus how did he even know how to access that  
**super fluffy** : Oh shit someone explain to Mishima what’s happening I think he’s about to cry

 **mishimoon** : yeaH.

 **fists on wheels** : I’m sure Ryuji himself can explain. I know you’re still alive and kicking, Sakamoto.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : fuck mako blowin my cover

 **mishimoon** : Sakamoto!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : sorry to make u worry n shit  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : 4206s just hackin into everyones phones and blasting this on loop  
**CATCH THESE HANDS:[dank.mp3](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkQ-bUseXNY)**

 **mishimoon** : …  
**mishimoon** : Is this… a weed song? to the tune of thomas the tank engine?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah

 **yeet** : isnt it a delightful tune

 **strawberry shortcake** : You didn’t have to blast it! My roommate woke up bc of that too and she stared at me like I was nuts!

 **super fluffy** : Which you are

 **strawberry shortcake** : Does it sound like I’m denying it?

 **super fluffy** : No no carry on

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey i just have the program tabas the one who set it up  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i aint smart enough for that shit  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : she told me that the volumes based on how high u got ur ringer on

 **strawberry shortcake** : Oh

 **super fluffy** : You had it on full blast didn’t you

 **strawberry shortcake** : I have several regrets

 **yeet** : mood

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : mood

 **super fluffy** : Mood

 **fists on wheels** : Mood.  
**fists on wheels** : Where’s Yusuke?

 **yeet** : probably still raging  
yeet: i got him

 **graphic design is my passion** : I must apologize to Kirijo-san the next time we see her.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Wtf did you do Yusuke?

 **graphic design is my passion** : I may have accidentally broken a vase.

 **super fluffy** : Don’t worry about that Yusuke she’s got a million more at home

 **graphic design is my passion** : If you’re certain.

 **super fluffy** : I’m 100% sure  
**super fluffy** : Anyway what did you want to talk about Ryu?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : fUCKIN THIS  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : whatthefuck.png

 **super fluffy** : The fuck

 **strawberry shortcake** : !!!!!!!

 **graphic design is my passion** : That looks stunning. What a clever incorporation of lightning bolts in such a lavish looking invitation.

 **fists on wheels** : That was supposed to be a surprise, Ryuji.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : IT PROBABLY WAS BUT IT SURE AS HELL ISNT NOW

 **mishimoon** : Is that a birthday invitation?  
**mishimoon** : So that birthday party you were yelling about before is real?!

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : DOES IT LOOK LIKE I CAN LIE

 **fists on wheels** : Well, I guess it’s not a surprise anymore.  
**fists on wheels** : You’re having a birthday party, Akira.  
**fists on wheels** : I had invited haru to come, if you don’t mind. Though you did say it was fine if you did have a party, which you are.

 **super fluffy** : H

 **strawberry shortcake** : Why do you have an invite?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : why the hell wouldnt i have one  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i bet u guys have one too

 **super fluffy** : H

 **strawberry shortcake** : I’m gonna check my email real quick...  
**strawberry shortcake** : You’re right!  
**strawberry shortcake** : lookatthis.png  
**strawberry shortcake** : Okay Souji-san had to be one of the people designing this is there are strawberries on fire on it

 **yeet** : fancy  
**yeet** : heres mine  
**yeet** : techasshitbois.png  
**yeet** : i cant believe there are old ass memes on mine

 **graphic design is my passion** : It won’t hurt to show mine.  
**graphic design is my passion** : invitation.png

 **strawberry shortcake** : Is that a painting?

 **graphic design is my passion** : Hm, to incorporate Starry Night with ice crystals in my invitation, whoever made this must have had a certain eye for art.

 **yeet** : boo such a boring file name inari

 **fists on wheels** : invitation.png  
**fists on wheels** : Well, it certainly does look nice.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : nice my ass therere golden bombs on yours  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : thats kickass

 **super fluffy** : H

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : aki?

 **mishimoon** : Guys I think he’s in shock.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Do you have one Mishima?

 **mishimoon** : Probably not. I’m not really a part of the phantom thieves like the rest of you!

 **fists on wheels** : Come on, you shouldn’t say that when you haven’t even checked.

 **mishimoon** : I guess…  
**mishimoon** : !!!!!!! I have one!  
**mishimoon** : invitation.png

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : see?! ur just as much of a phantom thief as the rest of us

 **strawberry shortcake** : It has moons on it!!

 **yeet** : looks cool i guess

 **mishimoon** : It says “Formal Attire Only”...

 **yeet** : wait what

 **shihohoho** : morning bitches

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : oh shit

 **shihohoho** : who’s nose am i gonna punch in first.

 **strawberry shortcake** : Let’s talk a little bit later…  
**strawberry shortcake** : Me and Ryuji are heading your way, Mishima  
**strawberry shortcake** : The best way to cure Akira of shock is to throw Ryuji at him  
**strawberry shortcake** : He’ll just absorb it

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : ha ha very funny takamaki  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : but yeah we’re comin

 

**Hawaii: September 13, 2016 (Noon)**

**Japan: September 14, 2016 (Morning)**

 

**You Fools**

**Tiny Munchkin** : You guys  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Are such motherfuckers

 **eternal rest** : you’re welcome

 **Walking Spoon** : Looks like you’ve recovered from your shock.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : I dunno what Ann’s been doing or if it’s because of Phantom Thieves shit but she actually picked up Ryuji and threw him at me  
**Tiny Munchkin** : He kicked me in the gut  
**Tiny Munchkin** : It still hurts  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Mishima almost fainted from shock

 **eternal rest** : but you’re fine

 **Tiny Munchkin** : A-okay  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Shadows hit harder

 **Walking Spoon** : Don’t we know it.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : So,, about this party

 **Walking Spoon** : :)

 **eternal rest** : :)

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Is everyone coming  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Like EVERYONE

 **Walking Spoon** : Ken had class and Fuuka-san has to monitor the headquarters while Mitsuru-san isn’t there, so there will be people missing.  
**Walking Spoon** : Nanako and Dojima-san won’t be able to make it, but there are gifts when you come back to Inaba.

 **eternal rest** : aigis is staying in japan too  
**eternal rest** : she sends her regards and the promise to teach you how to fire a rocket launcher

 **Tiny Munchkin** : FUCKIN SWEET  
**Tiny Munchkin** : But also another thing  
**Tiny Munchkin** : “Formal Attire Only”

 **eternal rest** : mitsuru-senpai’s personal request  
**eternal rest** : if you think you don’t want a formal party and be treated like fucking royalty then your lying to yourself  
**eternal rest** : ryoji just said you’re the “extraest teenager i’ve ever known”

 **Walking Spoon** : I agree.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : But I didn’t bring formal clothes and wait nevermind you’ve probably got that all covered

 **eternal rest** : did you ever doubt us

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Well all of you are experts in making my living a paradise but also a living hell

 **Walking Spoon** : You know we love you.  
**Walking Spoon** : Also we also single handedly contacted the guardians of your friends, so we’ve got it all covered, sizes and all.  
**Walking Spoon** : Some of their family members sent in clothes to wear instead of having newly tailored ones, the Takamakis in particular.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Fuckin scary

 **eternal rest** : :3c  
**eternal rest** : everything should arrive at your doors tomorrow

 **Tiny Munchkin** : How is it all gonna go down  
**Tiny Munchkin** : I know in Niihau but nothing else

 **eternal rest** : oh wow did you forget what a surprise is akira

 **Tiny Munchkin** : Alright alright I get it  
**Tiny Munchkin** : Party pooper

 **Walking Spoon** : You’re the one trying to poop on his own party.

 **Tiny Munchkin** : …

 **eternal rest** : …

 **Walking Spoon** : Wait that didn’t come out right.  
**Walking Spoon** : Fuck.

 **eternal rest** : lmao

 

**Hawaii: September 14, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**Japan: September 15, 2016 (Noon)**

**yeet** : annandakirainvolcano.png  
**yeet** : look at these fucking nerds

 **shihohoho** : um what’s going on?????

 **yeet** : remember when ann and aki said they were going to look for a pit  
**yeet** : they found their pit

 **shihohoho** : is that a volcano?!

 **yeet** : yeah ann and akira found their pit  
**yeet** : in front a goddamn volcano  
**yeet** : oh shit ann slapped akira’s face  
**yeet** : his glasses are gone  
**yeet** : theyre on the floor cracked probably  
**yeet** : and akira tackles her onto the floor  
**yeet** : ouch thats gonna leave a mark  
**yeet** : ryujis fuckin cackling and taking 50 billion pictures  
**yeet** : news flash dude ur phones not gonna hold that many idiot

 **shihohoho** : omg should i be worried????? bc i am??????????

 **yeet** : haha dont worry  
**yeet** : and ann grabbed his hair  
**yeet** : omgjdfsldkfjlsdfhkdsjf that fuckin screech aki  
**yeet** : i think ryujis crying  
**yeet** : inaris tryin to draw this wtf  
**yeet** : okay nvm hes pretty damn good  
**yeet** : i think anns goin in for the burn

 **Sets** : Are they involving their affinities now?

 **yeet** : yep yep  
**yeet** : oh shit their taking off their kid gloves we’re sparrin for real now  
**yeet** : theyre trading punches  
**yeet** : aki knicked ann in the jaw  
**yeet** : she kicked him in the stomach ouch  
**yeet** : was that a fucking sizzle

 **Sets** : Tell Takamaki to reign it in. You don’t want her to accidentally burn Akira.

 **yeet** : just yelled it  
**yeet** : aki yelled back that its fine he has a persona with a fire strength in front now

 **Sets** : That’s a little better. Is Minato there?

 **yeet** : duh  
**yeet** : he says hes got diarahan ready for when theyre done

 **Sets** : That’s definitely better now.

 **shihohoho** : affinities?

 **Sets** : Everyone has their own affinity to one element. This the main element they use in the other world.  In the real world, this manifests as powers and alterations in their bodies.

 **shihohoho** : like how?

 **Sets** : Ann has a fire affinity, so her body will naturally be warmer than the average human. She can also concentrate heat into her palms and eject it outwards.

 **shihohoho** : Like Minato-san?

 **Sets** : Not really. Minato is special, but everyone has a different relationship with their affinities, even those of the same element. Takamaki-chan can probably burn with her hands, but she can’t create fire from her hands like Minato can.

 **yeet** : ann can burn people w her hands but she can also breathe out fire  
**yeet** : like she just did  
**yeet** : aki stop screeching like that ur killing ur boyfriend

 **shihohoho** : whoa!  
**shihohoho** : and all persona users have something like that, right?  
**shihohoho** : But this sparring seems really dangerous...

 **mishimoon** : I know right?!

 **shihohoho** : yuuki that good you’re here! futaba-chan’s not being all that helpful, so can you tell me what exactly is going on here?

 **yeet** : im plenty helpful  
**yeet** : oh wow aki went flying fuckin rip

 **mishimoon** : Kurusu and Takamaki are fighting inside a pit in front of Mount Kilauea.

 **shihohoho** : wtf?

 **mishimoon** : Kitagawa, Nijima-senpai, and Sakamoto have repeatedly told me that this is normal and they need to spar once in a while but I’m not so sure.

 **yeet** : oh no this is completely normal  
**yeet** : we fight each other often  
**yeet** : well not me bc im a walking stick but the others go out and spar when they have the time  
**yeet** : for cardio or some shit  
**yeet** : mako said they started doing it ever since she roped them in for self defense classes  
**yeet** : i can confidently say that all of them can and will shank a bitch if needed  
**yeet** : there goes akis glasses  
**yeet** : the crack that echoed all around the world  
**yeet** : wow that sounded wrong

 **mishimoon** : OH my god changing someone’s heart actually involves actual combat like I didn’t know about that then what about the requests that are posted on the phansite are you guys actually always in danger wherever you go and do a request oh my god I didn’t know but then your job is always dangerous enough that you need to learn self defense but if it’s that dangerous then is there that possibility that you could get killed oH MY GOD HAVE ALL OF YOU ALMOST DIED

 **yeet** : calm down mishima

 **Sets** : That’s what these sparring matches are for. So that they could get better in battling against foes and defending against them.  
**Sets** : They should have explained it to you by now.

 **mishimoon** : There’s a lot of things they say on here that I don’t understand, but it doesn’t really matter to me. They’re all doing it for the sake of reform, after all. I don’t need to know their exact methods, I just want to help in anyway I can.

 **yeet** : u kno theyre gonna read this right

 **mishimoon** : I know.

 **yeet** : well alright then  
**yeet** : bing bong bitches we have a winner  
**yeet** : the winner is  
**yeet** : sike its a tie they knocked each other out at the same time  
**yeet** : ann and akira fucking died

 

**Hawaii: September 14, 2016 (Evening)**

**Japan: September 15, 2016 (Afternoon)**

 

**Phantom Thieves**

**Queen** : Is everyone here?

 **Panther** : Comfortable in bed, but I’m here!

 **Skull** : Same.

 **Mona** : I’m here too!

 **Joker** : Everyone should be on right now.  
**Joker** : What did you need?

 **Queen** : There was something Oracle wanted to talk about the day before but we didn’t get to it.  
**Queen** : I think it’s about time we got to that.

 **Oracle** : Well, it’s a good time now as any!  
**Oracle** : Me and Mishima have been keeping up with the poll on the phansite and I think it’s about time to talk about who we should go after next.  
**Oracle** : The poll says Okumura Kunikazu, but…  
**Oracle** : Should we go after him?

 **Skull** : If the guy’s the top on the poll, then that’s who all the people want a change of heart to happen to, yeah?

 **Panther** : We’ve never acted on a poll before…

 **Fox** : I personally believe the poll shouldn’t exist at all.

 **Panther** : Why’s that?

 **Fox** : We as Phantom Thieves all acted on our targets voluntarily.  
**Fox** : If we follow the whims of the public now, then we’re merely tools to forward their goals.  
**Fox** : If this Okumura Kunikazu did indeed have a Palace, would we be following the wishes of the poll rather than our own?

 **Mona** : Oh I get it!  
**Mona** : If we do follow the poll and he does have a change of heart, then the poll will basically become a hit list for all of the people the public want changes of heart to happen to.  
**Mona** : There would be constant targets, yes, but then we’d, I don’t know, go mad with power or something.  
**Mona** : Not to mention that we would no longer be in the shadows anymore.

 **Skull** : That sounds cool as shit!  
**Skull** : But I can see where you’re coming from.  
**Skull** : Fame is fucking cool, but if we get too popular, then we’re just entertainment for the people watching instead of trying to prove social reform, yeah?

 **Queen** : Correct.  
**Queen** : Should we go after Okumura Kunikazu?  
**Queen** : That’s your call, Joker.

 **Joker** : We won’t.  
**Joker** : All of our targets were personally involved with each one of our members.  
**Joker** : None of us are stupid.  
**Joker** : Okumura Kunikazu is related to Okumura Haru some way or another.  
**Joker** : If we’re just going to go after him for the sake of him being on the poll, then there is no point. We’re just puppets to do what the people want.  
**Joker** : If Okumura is doing something that personally offends us, then we’ll go after him.

 **Oracle** : About that.

 **Joker** : None of us are going to like this, are we.

 **Oracle** : Not one bit.  
**Oracle** : Well for one, your own senpai recommended that I look into Okumura and what he’s been doing and it’s really bad.  
**Oracle** : Workplace abuse; workers are forced to work unreasonably late hours with terrible safety practices. It isn’t unusual for workers to go home with injuries or to develop health problems.  
**Oracle** : There are articles that say that Okumura Foods has been in scandals multiple times, but because of the company’s wealth, they’ve been able to sweep it under the rug.

 **Queen** : That’s horrible…

 **Skull** : Well he sounds as much as a bitch as the other targets.

 **Joker** : No there’s more. While Haru is hiding her status as Okumura’s daughter from the school and us, there should be articles about her, right?  
**Joker** : As the only daughter of a rich family, she should be well known around the right crowds.

 **Fox** : I assume you know this because of Kirijo-san?

 **Joker** : You’re right.  
**Joker** : Mitsuru-senpai told me wasn’t uncommon for company heads, father’s biggest supporters, and cooperating companies to know who she was. That way, it wouldn’t be a surprise when she would eventually come in to take over for her father.

 **Oracle** : I had to poke around, but I did find some articles where Haru is with Okumura. And…

 **Joker** : What’s wrong?

 **Oracle** : Well, there are some dating from years back to now and Haru just looks…  
**Oracle** : Sad.

 **Queen** : Would it be too much of a stretch to assume that something is happening at home with Haru and her father?

 **Skull** : Whoa, I’m surprised you’re the one saying that!

 **Queen** : As much as I don’t want to think about it, we must be prepared for all possible situations.

 **Oracle** : It’s not impossible, but there’s nothing I can see from what I’ve researched.

 **Panther** : Well, if there’s nothing really happening to Haru, we don’t have to go after Okumura.  
**Panther** : But imagine what that might do to the phansite.

 **Mona** : If we don’t go through with it, then our popularity will slowly plummet, but that also means that we’re more likely to stay in the shadows.  
**Mona** : The public will wonder if we really are changing hearts of scumbags if we aren’t going to go after their number one.

 **Skull** : If we don’t go after Okumura, that don’t mean that we could go after others on the list.  
**Skull** : Like, Akechi’s on the list too, right? We could kick his ass!

 **Joker** : Let’s wait on who to go after.  
**Joker** : I don’t think we can even get to the Mementos pocket of the Metaverse from here.  
**Joker** : Once we go back to Japan, we’ll figure out what to do, alright?

 **Skull** : Got it!

 **Panther** : Gotcha!

 **Fox** : Of course.

 **Queen** : Alright.

 **Mona** : Okay!

 **Queen** : Now then, there’s a more important mission to be had tomorrow.  
**Queen** : I assume Seta-san and Arisato-san have already delivered the clothes to each of your rooms.

 **Panther** : Yes they have!  
**Panther** : Mine is a perfect fit!

 **Joker** : Oh my god guys, why don’t we just talk about this in the other chat?

 **Skull** : Dude, this mission is of top of the line importance!  
**Skull** : It’s our leader’s birthday tomorrow!

 **Joker** : It’s technically today because it’s the 15th in Japan right now but that’s fine.

 **Queen** : Make sure all of you have your gifts tomorrow for the party. Haru has been kind enough to act as the in-between for us and Minato-san when it comes to the party since Joker isn’t supposed to know much about it.

 **Joker** : You’re telling me details right now.

 **Queen** : Only the ones you need to know, leader.  
**Queen** : The party begins at 8 in the evening. Make sure you get there at a reasonable time.  
**Queen** : I know Joker and Skull will be going out in the afternoon…

 **Skull** : What the hell Queen, you didn’t have to reveal that to the rest of the thieves!

 **Panther** : A birthday date? How cute!

 **Oracle** : You’re such a sap, Skull.

 **Skull** : Shut up!

 **Fox** : The love between you two is pure and beautiful, like the sky on a clear summer’s day.

 **Skull** : Ughhhhhhhhhhhh…

 **Queen** : Let’s all go out in the morning then. How does that sound?

 **Joker** : I’m down.

 **Panther** : Then we’re all going!

 **Queen** : Alright then. Let’s have a fun day tomorrow, everyone.

 **Oracle** : You make it sounds so awkward, Queen!

 **Queen** : How else am I supposed to say it?!

 

_ <"Are you sure you’re not going to come?"_

_…_

_"I… understand; you know I do, all of us do, but it’s Akira’s birthday and —”_

_…_

_"He won’t let you out of Japan at all? Not even for a vacation?"_

_…_

_"...Damn that man."_

_..._

_"You and Akira are in contact. Why don’t you tell him yourself?"_

_..._

_"Damn that man!"_

_..._

_"Don’t say it’s fine. I can’t stand what he’s done with you. Are you doing alright?"_

_..._

_"When all of this is over, you need to talk to Akira. He deserves an explanation for everything."_

_..._

_"Goodbye."_

_*click* > _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Okumura Haru** : was that akira-kun and ann-chan in a pit? Are they doing alright?
> 
>  **Nijima Makoto** : They've been... better.
> 
> * * *
> 
> NEXT IS AKIRA'S BIRTHDAY WHOOP WHOOP


	16. it's time to PARTY!!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akira's birthday contains Velvet Room, shenanigans, Minato, and a hell of a lot of the evening party!! Also, someone important makes an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To make up for the 1 month wait, here's an 8000+ worded chapter!
> 
> I had... problems with this chapter so I HOPE EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE AHAHA.

**Hawaii: September 14, 2016 (Midnight)**

**Japan: September 15, 2016 (Affternoon)**

 

**Shadow Operatives: Main**

**Kirijo** : All Shadow Operatives members, please stay on your toes.  
**Kirijo** : Everyone staying in Japan, please keep an eye on the company.  
**Kirijo** : Shadow activity in the Midnight Channel has remained at an all time low and there aren’t as many Shadows breaching the divide into the real world, but there is something different in the air.  
**Kirijo** : During the duration of the Phantom Thieves’ stay in Hawaii, you are the ones in charge of regulating Mementos activity.  
**Kirijo** : All who traverse the lower floors, if the door at the bottom opens before they return, you inform me immediately.  
**Kirijo** : I understand that he will dropping by for a visit, so do tell if there is something important I must know.  
**Kirijo** : Everyone in Hawaii, you will be tasked with security.  
**Kirijo** : While Okumura isn’t coming here directly, he will be sending his daughter to settle the deal for her.  
**Kirijo** : Unfortunately, to make sure I don’t do anything slimy, which he said in his own words, he has sent an entourage of bodyguards and I believe Okumura-chan’s fiancé as a failsafe.  
**Kirijo** : Seta, Arisato, make certain Akira and his friends aware of the added uninvited guests.  
**Kirijo** : Also be prepared to accompany me for the meeting.  
**Kirijo** : If Okumura has sent a bodyguards, it will be of poor image if I don’t have my own.  
**Kirijo** : Good day.

 

**September 15, 2016 (Morning)**  
**September 16, 2016 (Early Morning)**  


**WE DEM BOIS [Ryuji, Ann, Futaba, Makoto, Yusuke, Mishima]**  
  
**crackalackin** : im in position  
**crackalackin** : r u guys good too  
  
**Niijima Makoto** : Futaba and Yusuke arrived a little while ago.  
**Niijima Makoto** : We have the materials ready.  
  
**crackalackin** : ann?  
  
**(*˙︶˙*)☆*°** : I’m right next to you, Ryuji  
  
**crackalackin** : chill dude just makin sure ur good  
**crackalackin** : u r right  
  
**(*˙︶˙*)☆*°** : Armed and ready  
  
**crackalackin** : fuckin A  
**crackalackin** : whenever u feel like it mishima we’re ready  
  
**Mishima Yuuki** : Are you sure this is going to work?  
  
**crackalackin** : if it works fuckin great if it doesnt then we’ll try again  
**crackalackin** : god knows how akis able to sleep like a brick  
**crackalackin** : but thats y we have all this shit  
**crackalackin** : in case dear leader of ours feels like getting a few more minutes of snooze instead of wakin up to a busy ass day  
  
**Mishima Yuuki** : ...Hm, alright then.  
**Mishima Yuuki** : I’m opening the door!

  
  
“Is there any specific reason why I’m here?” asks Akira, sitting on the floor like he always does. As much as he likes the sooty floors and the hideous looking toilet of the Velvet Room, there shouldn’t have been any reason why he needed to meet with his prison master when he was nowhere near said actual prison. “I _am_ on vacation, you know.”  
  
“Don’t get smart with our master, inmate!” Caroline yells and slams her baton into the bars. Sparks jumps off of the baton, fading seconds after existing. Akira blinks. On his other side, Justine readjusts her grip on her clipboard, but says nothing. She only gives him a familiar smoldering look he remembers from when he was scolded by every adult he knew as a kid. Igor chuckles deeply.  
  
“I believe today is your day of birth, correct?” he asks.  
  
“Yes? Why?” Both of Akira’s eyebrows raise in disbelief. “Is my prison master actually going to give me well wishes?” Caroline now looks ready to snap his neck off, but a pointed glare from Justine stops her from reaching into the cell and beating him up.

“Indeed. I have heard that it is customary for people to give each other well wishes during their day of birth. I feel that it is customary for me to do the same. Happy birthday, Trickster.” Akira starts. He didn’t actually think Igor was going to wish him happy birthday.

“You...didn’t have to,” the inmate says lamely. How else was he supposed to react when his prison master tells him happy birthday? He can’t have a goddamn party in a prison, nor can he really do anything without getting on Caroline’s nerves, so he elects to just sit and stare.

 “I must for our dearest Trickster.” Ugh. It just sounds so… wrong coming from him. Akira smothers a cringe. No need to quicken his eventual demise by Caroline’s hand.

 “N-No seriously, you didn’t need to. Thank you, though.” Yeah, that was the best way to go. Gratitude. Caroline tuts, less annoyed than she usually sounds.

 “You don’t deserve acknowledgement from our master, inmate. Make sure you take that complement to heart,” she huffs, crossing her arms.

 “I’m…sure I will.” Scratching the back of his head, Akira shifts on his butt while pointedly ignoring the way Justine was staring at him. “Can I ask for a gift at least?”

“A gift?” Igor sounds interested. “I have heard of there being an exchange of gifts in the real world. Very well, what would like to know?”

Akira internally prepares himself. Here we go. “Did you ever greet Minato-senpai with a happy birthday?”

Now listen here, Akira never brought up Minato and Souji in his conversations with Igor and the twins. He had assumed he knew about them, what with the amount to time he’s been with them and all, not to mention the fact that Igor was probably aware of their meeting in August. But ever since Minato and Souji told him some things about their experiences in the Velvet Room, Akira realized some things. There weren’t other attendants. Igor never talked about the other Wild Cards. The guillotine had apparently been new, so had Lockdown and the Gallows (and Minato and Souji looked horrified when he told then how he fused Personas.) He’d bet his entire life savings and Minato’s candy stash in the sticker covered drawer that Igor knew who Minato and Souji were, but not _who_ Minato and Souji were. Now it was just time to put it to the test.

Caroline and Justine freeze. Both of them look a little bit uncomfortable, even as they try to save face. The big man himself only hums, not perturbed in the slightest. “Hm, why do you ask, Trickster?”

Akira twiddles his thumbs, staring at his prison master unabashedly. “I mean, he was a guest of the Velvet Room and he did get to know you…”

“I’m afraid I cannot answer that. Guest aren’t privy to the journeys of other guests.”

“Even if I know him? Even if he’s one of the ones who told me about this stuff?”

“I cannot tell you anymore.”

“Bullshit.” And the chain around his ankle clatters noisily as he stands up, grabbing the metal bars even as Caroline and Justine stare at him hard enough to laser a hole through him. “Souji-senpai told me that you told him about Minato-senpai, especially when they started working together. He told me how Minato-senpai even stayed in the Velvet Room sometimes, even when Souji-senpai was on his journey.”

For the first time ever, Igor shifts in his seat. Akira can’t tell if it’s out of nervousness or just because he wants to shift, but the large grin and his bulbous eyes stay planted on him as he moves. His face doesn’t move at all. “Have they now?” he asks. His fingers begin tapping his desk again. “Pray tell, whenever did this happen?”

“They told me long before I met you about a long nosed man they both knew and three people they met. Only recently have I understood.” Akira narrows his eyes at him. “You don’t know who they are. Tell me then, who are you?!”

“Justine, Caroline.”

The loud metallic sound of Caroline’s baton slams straight into the bar right in front of Akira’s face, electricity arching over the long metal stick close enough that he could feel the static against his eyebrows. The cell door suddenly opens, Akira stumbling out with a loud exclamation before he’s roughly grabbed on both sides, the grips of both girls’ a lot harsher and rougher than he expects. He sees Caroline leaning over him, her eye filled with bloodlust and glee as the point of her baton jams right into his temple—

—White hot pain, searing into his brain—

And then Akira jolts, back in his cell, kneeling on the ground, staring at his hands, loud ringing in his ears with a fog over his mind.

“W-What?”

“You disobeyed and disrespected our Master,” Caroline sniffs haughtily, tapping her baton—white hot pain—against her hand. “so, we were ordered to discipline you.”

“Discipline?”

“Correct.” Justine flips through her clipboard’s papers idly. “You did not treat our master with respect, so we as his servants had to resort to drastic measures in order to keep you silent.” Her single golden eye looks up and meets his own. His steel crumbles under her piercing gold. “You will not step out of line again. Is that clear?”

_H-Holy shit._ “Crystal, Justine.” Shaking off the… whatever happened to him, Akira stands. The ball and chain attached to his foot clatters noisily. “I’m… sorry for stepping out of line.”

“Think none of it, the girls were just doing their job.” And as, well, happy as Igor can be, it sends a chill down Akira’s spine.

“Is there anything else you needed from me? I can’t exactly make any new Personas while I’m here.”

“You may return from whence you came, Trickster,” says Igor, his long twiglike finger rhythmically tapping on the desk. “though I must warn you. You will have quiet the rude awakening.”

“Rude awakening? What do you mean?”

“You will find out when you wake.” That was probably as much of an answer he was going to get. Akira shrugs.

“Oh, uh, I know you usually call me for something cryptic or whatever, but why did you call me here again?”

“Do not worry about it, Trickster.”

 

**→Enter Here for Gays and Thieving←**  

**Sets** : Hey guys, just letting you know that there are going to be more guests invited to the party.  
**Sets** : Well, invited might to too nice of a term.  
**Sets** : More like barged into the party.  
**Sets** : Minato, Ryoji, and the others here are going to keep an eye on them.  
**Sets** : You all just enjoy the party.  
**Sets** : Ah wait, is this the surprise wake up part?  
**Sets** : Have fun then.

 

When Igor said Akira would have a rude awakening, he didn’t expect to get bodied by his boyfriend. Nor did he expect to see his friends parading into his hotel room armed with noisemakers.

“Happy birthday, babe!” His sweet sunshine of a boyfriend greets him giddily, even though he’s currently got Akira pinned under him. Akira’s laugh comes out more of a wheeze than a laugh. Ann and Futaba parade towards his bed, blowing into their noisemakers and make loud enough noise that would probably bother the people in the next room over while Yusuke and Makoto walk up to him with balloons in their hands with “Happy birthday” written in loud bubbly letters. All the while, Mishima peers from the door, curious but too intimidated to be in the same air as the actual Phantom Thieves.

“Happy birthday, Akira!” Ann cheers before lousy blowing into her noisemaker.

“Happy birthday,” says Makoto simply, giving him a small smile. Yusuke says the same thing, but he instead ties the balloon to one of the chairs, so now his hand is free to frame the clusterfuck in front of him.

“Wake up, you big lug, we’ve got places to be!” Futaba yells, jumping onto the foot of the bed.

“Guys, guys, please,” Akira warbles from beneath the pillow that had decided to follow the rules of gravity and slide from above his head to onto his face. Ryuji, with half of his body on Akira’s stomach and the other half off the edge of the bed, pulls the pillow off of Akira’s face. “Ah.” His fluffy black hair poofs up with a vengeance, following the direction of Ryuji’s hand as little sparks flicker and race around his fingers. “Please stop charging Ryuji before you accidently shoot a lightning bolt through my brain.”

“Hey, I ain’t training fine control for nothin’!” he responds loudly, but the crackle of electricity fades an Akira’s hair falls back on his head like a mop.

Makoto smiles down at him. Wow, he did not expect the image of Niijima Makoto carrying a huge ass balloon with bubble letter to grace his eyes today. “Come on, leader, it’s time to get up,” she prompts. 

“Not even five more minutes?” Akira asks. He stares at Ryuji with his best puppy dog eyes because he knows how weak he is—

And then Yusuke pulls Ryuji off of the bed with one hand before his boyfriend can melt. Damn it.

“Don’t even try, Akira,” Ann tuts, grinning, “You’ve got a lot of things to do today! It’s your birthday, after all! Not to mention that we’ve got free reign right now until the party in Niihau!” And Akira rolls over.

“But what if I just wanna sleep…?”

Futaba honks into her noisemaker again right into Akira’s ear. He yowls and careens over the bed and lands on the ground with a loud thud. _Fuck—_ “You can be lazy once we get back home but right now you’re gonna pick your ass up and we’re gonna have the time of our lives you hear?!” she yells.

“Yeah yeah, I hear you,” he mummers from the floor. None of them reach to help him up. Assholes.

“Good!” Akira pushes himself onto his feet. Well, at least he knew what rude awakening Igor was talking about. Though, he wouldn’t classify it as rude since his friends were just looking forward to a good day. It was more of an… enthusiastic awakening. Yeah, let’s go with that. 

“Now get out of here, all of you,” he commands, walking up to his suitcase, “I need to change.” He shoos them away with one hand. Some of them walk away, like Yusuke and Ann, but Futaba keeps goading Ryuji into watching Akira change and as much as Akira finds the blush on his boyfriend’s face absolutely delightful, he knows if Ryuji stays, this’ll become less of a changing moment and more a strip tease. “Come on guys, the faster I get changed, the faster we can leave.”

“Don’t try to go back to sleep,” Makoto says with a frown and a glare. “because we have more than enough noisemakers on us to wake up the dead.”

Hm, what should he wear today? The shorts for sure, there was no way jeans were going to get worn in heat the same temperature as hell itself. But the shirt… “Don’t worry, Makoto, I know you. I’ll be out soon.” Eugh, why did he have long sleeved shirts in his suitcase?

“I’m holding you to that.” And with that, Makoto herds the rest of the thieves out of the room. Mishima, still by the door, offers him a smile.

“Happy birthday, Kurusu. I hope you’ll have a fun time today!” Akira blinks, a t-shirt with Jack Frost on it in his hands.

“You aren’t coming?” he asks and puts the shirt back inside. “You know you can come, right?” Nope, as much as he was a dork, he doesn’t want to look like a complete dork in a foreign country. Mishima shakes his head.

“There’s some things I have to do. I brought my laptop with me, so I’ll be trying to iron out some functions on the Phansite.”

“You’re working on the Phansite here? We’re on vacation.”

“I know I know, but I feel like there’s something wrong on the site. I’m planning to look into it.” Mishima smiles. “Don’t worry, I’ll see all of you in the party!”

“If you’re sure…”

“Positive. I’ll get out of your way now.” He leaves and closes the door with a quiet click. Akira sighs. Ah, alone with his suitcase again. _And now, since there’s no witnesses to say no…_ He pulls out a shirt and his smile turns malicious. Ohohoho…

 

**→Enter Here for Gays and Thieving←**  

**shihohoho** : happy birthday akira-kun!!

**super fluffy** : Thanks shiho

**shihohoho** : sorry i couldn’t come  
**shihohoho** : school week and all

**super fluffy** : It’s fine  
**super fluffy** : I’m waiting for that present when I get back tho

**shihohoho** : hahaha of course!

  

“You’re an embarrassment,” Makoto groans, shaking her head in her hand. He should probably be feeling pretty bad now, but he can’t find any reason to since he can now wear the bright pink Hawaiian shirt with pineapples the color of every neon color in existence without getting thrown into a closet and forced to get changed into something boring.

“I’m the birthday boy, I get to do whatever I want!” Akira huffs triumphantly, grinning from ear to ear.

“I’m going to shove that shirt of yours in a vat of radioactive goo so it disappears forever.”

“Details, details. Come on, we’ll be late if we keep dawdling!”

“If anyone gives us weird looks, I’m blaming you.”

 

**→Enter Here for Gays and Thieving←**  

**super fluffy** : You knew about the whole wakeup call Souji-senpai  
**super fluffy** : How could you let this happen 

**Sets** : I am a law abiding citizen that likes to see the suffering of my favorite fake son.  
**Sets** : Also, it’s your birthday.  
**Sets** : You have to experience being tackled by your boyfriend into a bed with your friends blowing kazoos in your face at least once. 

**mints** : can confirm 

**super fluffy** : I was about to say they were noisemakers not kazoos but  
**super fluffy** : Minato-senpai is that you

**mints** : yeah

**super fluffy** : Where the hell did you come from  
**super fluffy** : When did you join  
**super fluffy** : Where’s the notif 

**mints** : i am magical  
**mints** : also sakura made it so that my entrance wasn’t noticed so i could surprise you  
**mints** : surprise bitch 

**super fluffy** : Well you did surprise me that’s for sure  
**super fluffy** : Did you know Souji-senpai 

**Sets** : No, but I just rolled with it. 

**super fluffy** : Typical senpai 

**mints** : where’s the rest of your crew 

**super fluffy** : Sleeping  
**super fluffy** : We had to get up super early since our tour starts at 7  
**super fluffy** : We’re just a cluster of sleep deprived Japanese kids in the back of a tour bus  
**super fluffy** : It’s great

**mints** : if you say so 

**Sets** : Anyway, since you’re here at least, we need to tell you that Okumura-chan’s father has sent some of his men overseas for your party.

**super fluffy** : Why I didn’t invite them

**Sets** : But you invited Okumura-chan and since I know you aren’t stupid, you know what kind of Okumura she is. 

**super fluffy** : Daughter of that big wig company right  
**super fluffy** : So he’s sending goons to make sure I don’t sully her purity or some shit

**mints** : more like to make sure the deal between the okumuras and mitsuru-senpai falls through

**super fluffy** : tf

**mints** : long story short okumura senior found out about your party and wanted in to make a deal between okumura foods and the kirijo group and he’s essentially blackmailing her by using you  
**mints** : he threatened to release your identity and the party details overseas if he didn’t get what he wanted  
**mints** : and you know none of us can risk it if you get shoved into media attention

**super fluffy** : what the fuck

**Sets** : None of us are happy about it, but it happened already.  
**Sets** : Don’t be bothered by the additional amount of people in your party.  
**Sets** : Just have fun, alright?

**super fluffy** : Haha you said fun now I’m going to be super paranoid

**Sets** : If any of them try anything, you’ve got a bunch of SOs on guard. Don’t worry.

**super fluffy** : I’ll do my best

**mints** : now look at what you’ve done souji  
**mints** : youve fucked up a perfectly good teenager  
**mints** : look at it  
**mints** : it’s got anxiety

**super fluffy** : mINATO-SENPAI

**Sets** : You say that if we all don’t have anxiety. 

**mints** : you’re right

 

Akira blinks before he pushes himself off the boat’s side.

From every corner, his vision is deep blue, the ocean stretching farther than his eye can see, miles beyond the little string of islands that is Hawaii. The water is clear of any wildlife, save for the pod of dolphins playing around with the tourists who decided to try their hand in jumping into the water.

A nose enters Akira’s peripheral and he momentarily meets eyes with a curious dolphin, drifting nearby. It chitters, flips around, before swimming towards the pod again. Grinning, he follows.

He can hear Ann’s distinct laughter from above. She and Yusuke had decided to stay above water, the former choosing to go under later and the latter never learning how to swim. When they get back home, he’ll need to rope the rest of the Phantom Thieves into giving Yusuke swimming lessons. Though they probably don’t need to be convinced since he saw their faces when Yusuke said he couldn’t swim. Ann looked ready to cry.

As Akira swims closer to the pod, he spots Ryuji and Makoto amongst the group of dolphins.

He isn’t a Futaba, but even he could tell how radiant both of his teammates are swimming amongst dolphins. Makoto’s all grace, following the paths of the animals while keeping a safe distance. She could very much be a dolphin herself, what with the way she’s gliding through the water. Hm, maybe they should’ve gone for that mermaid thing instead…

Nah. Yusuke wouldn’t have been able to go anyway. He’d be lamenting how he can’t bring a sketchbook in the water. Much like now actually.

And whatever Ryuji’s doing looks more like flailing than swimming. He’s all arms and legs; it’s a miracle how he can propel himself in the water. Ryuji’s trying his best to chase after one dolphin, kicking after it as much as he can. Bubbles filter out of the tube on his snorkel; he’s probably laughing. He and the dolphin circle around the rest of the pod before Ryuji splashes (can you splash while underwater?) with a stop next to Akira.

He elbows him, as if saying, “You wanna go and hang with them?”

Duh.

 

**Okumura Haru → Niijima Makoto**

**Okumura Haru** : makoto?

**Niijima Makoto** : Hello, Haru. Is there something you needed?

**Okumura Haru** : i was wondering if you were free!  
**Okumura Haru** : it would be understandable if you aren’t, it is akira-kun’s birthday after all.

**Niijima Makoto** : Actually, we just finished our outing until the party.  
**Niijima Makoto** : I’m free right about now.

**Okumura Haru** : are you sure? what about akira-kun and your friends?

**Niijima Makoto** : Akira and Ryuji are going out while the others are going to explore Oahu a little more.

**Okumura Haru** : You should go with them!

**Niijima Makoto** : It’s fine, I insist.  
**Niijima Makoto** : What do you need?

**Okumura Haru** : i just want to talk to you about something.  
**Okumura Haru** : just some things about the party, no big deal.

**Niijima Makoto** : If this is about your father blackmailing your way into the party, we all know about that already. Arisato-san told us.

**Okumura Haru** : really?!  
**Okumura Haru** : well, i feel really bad, i didn’t mean to interrupt your festivities like this.  
**Okumura Haru** : i just want to apologize to everyone!

**Niijima Makoto** : We all understand that it isn’t your fault.  
**Niijima Makoto** : You don’t have to blame yourself.  
**Niijima Makoto** : If you’re still free, we can take a walk around Oahu, if you’d like.  
**Niijima Makoto** : It was improper for all of us to look into your family without permission, so I feel it necessary to apologize to you as well.

**Okumura Haru** : you don’t have to do that!

**Niijima Makoto** : My offer still stands.

**Okumura Haru** : give me a few minutes!  
**Okumura Haru** : where are you?

**Niijima Makoto** : By the entrance of the hotel.

**Okumura Haru** : see you there!

 

He leans against the marble counter and watches his guest absentmindedly fiddling with the cup’s handle. The dorm is empty of course, save for them.

The boy at the counter laughs, sad and short. He hasn’t heard him laugh at all like he used to, years before everything went down.

“It seems like I’ve been spoiled. This coffee doesn’t taste nearly as good as it should,” he comments. “I suppose all those visits to LeBlanc have been getting to me.”

“How long do you have until you need to leave?”

“No one knows I’ve left Tokyo. I can stay for a few hours before they get suspicious.”

“I know you’re lying to me.”

He sighs. “An hour, at most. I gave the guards the slip and left my phone in an alleyway on the way here, but it’s only a matter of time before they find out that I’m not with them.”

His eye twitches. Kala-Nemi rumbles within him. “You’re going to get punished for this, Goro.”

Akechi Goro turns his head and gives him a look as fake as fool’s gold; a mask that looks so convincingly serene and calm that if he didn’t know any better, he wouldn’t have noticed the torrent of emotion churning inside him. “It won’t be the first time.”

 

**Shadow Operatives: Main**

**Amada** : Goro stopped by.  
**Amada** : He wanted updates on how the plan was going.

**Kirijo** : If everything goes well today, it will run smoothly.  
**Kirijo** : It’s about time for the party, everyone.  
**Kirijo** : Keep your guard.

 

Well, his fake parents definitely went all out on this.

First of all, their clothes. They might as well sell all of their clothes for the party if they ever ran out of funds because these suits and dresses look like, feel like, and heck, even smell like a fortune. As soon as Akira pulled his suit out of the garment bag, his eyes would’ve rolled right out of his head if they weren’t attached because holy balls, that was a lot of yen.

Everyone collectively losing their minds when they saw the price tags was an added bonus.

Next, the goddamn boat.

Ryoji had come through again, without Minato this time and with a different kind of boat. He was in formal wear like the rest of them, but he moved like he wasn’t wearing a suit jacket nor a scarf. His clothes didn’t even get wet while they watched him steer the boat from the inside of the cabin, where water sprayed up and over onto the boat sometimes. If this was some weird Death power he had or he was just supremely good at dodging sea water, he didn’t know.

Finally, the ballroom.

As soon as he steps into Mitsuru’s manor and was greeted by her servants and some wayward Kosei students, Akira’s breath leaves him in a noiseless gasp.

The entire ballroom was strewn with gold and red, long red curtains covering closed windows glittering under the tall reliefs of flowers and swirls, chandeliers hanging from the high ceiling in a circle surrounding what was probably the center of the ballroom. Tall stone pillars with golden reliefs reached up against the ceiling near each of the room’s four corners, surrounded by pots of flowers. The floor was a bare cream color, like it was balancing the complete business of the rest of the room. Tables dotted the ballroom floor, leaving one big space in the middle for obvious dancing.

“Hey ho, there’s the big boy!” Kanji calls from his seat, grinning widely. He’s still spotting that slicked back black hair, but the ear piercing is new. The occupants of his table look up—Rise, Chie, Yukiko—before they all, well, most of the people at each table shoot up from their seats and barrel towards him. Oh shit—

“Happy birthday, Kiichan!!” Rise squeals while she tackles him into a hug. From behind him, Chie slaps his back hard enough that it stings.

“Look at you! You’re so old now!” she laughs. Akira snickers, even while Rise’s still got her arms around his neck.

“Haha, says you. You’re like twice my age~!”

“I’m 26, not an old hag!” Kanji slaps the other side of his back before Rise lets go and he gives him a noogie.

“Ka-Kanji-senpai, my hair!” Akira complains.

“You can fix it later! Let me have this, I won’t be able to do this when we get back anyway!” he laughs and messes up his hair next even more than it already was. Well, this was a regular occurrence anyway…

“Happy birthday, Akira-kun!” Yukiko says brightly from Chie’s side. “I made some of the dishes we’re going to serve today, so I hope you enjoy. And don’t worry, I tasted them before they served.”

“Well thank the stars for that,” Akira comments, and Yukiko simply giggles and smiles. He’d heard horror stories about her cooking from Souji and the rest of Investigation Team, he’s glad that she’s gotten better as he grew up.

…Though she still threatened to make something truly like the fabled Mystery Food X if worse came to worse. He dreads the day.

“Hey hey hey!” Another arm slings around Akira’s shoulder. He looks up to find Junpei, sans baseball cap with his hair cut for once, grinning down at him. “The big 1-7, huh? Well, there ain’t a lot you could do at 17, but hey! You’re finally kickin’ ass like the rest of us!” He grinds his hand into his hair. Goddamnit not again! “I knew you had it in you!”

“Junpei-senpai—”

“Come on, you’re making him uncomfortable,” Yukari snips, rolling her eyes at Junpei. Ignoring his squawk, she smiles at Akira. “Happy birthday, Akira.”

“If he really is uncomfortable he would tell me, right?”

“Honestly, it’s fine, Yukari-senpai.”

“Suit yourself.”

Oh, is that Futaba losing it in the background? Sounds about right. Junpei mumbles something and lets of Akira’s head, but his arm is still around his shoulders. Akira grins. “Thanks, Yukari-senpai. You still doing that job of yours?”

“Of course,” she remarks. She cocks her hip to the side and rest her hand on it. “It’s a little hard, what with the Shadow Operatives and all, but I’m still going strong!” Her smile grows into a grin that matches his own. “Why are you asking? You knew as soon as I got the job permanently.”

“Well~,” he glances at Futaba, who’s trying her hardest to hide behind Yusuke, but she can’t help but peek around his side at Yukari in awe. “there’s a Phantom Thief that happens to watch Featherman and she’s kind of a big fan.”

“Is it that one hiding behind your tall friend?” And Yukari’s not even looking at Yusuke and she knows. Delightful!

“Yep yep.” She turns around and Futaba yelps, hiding behind Yusuke even more now, jittering in what was hopefully excited nervousness and not something else. With purpose, Yukari starts walking over to Futaba and—

“Akira.” And in comes the lady herself. Mitsuru strolls in decked to the nines in a fancy evening dress, shawl, and heels. The butlers and maid part for her like they did with the gaggle of Phantom Thieves, but she has that look her eye that he recognizes.

Akira meets eyes with Makoto. He glances at Mitsuru inconspicuously before staring Makoto down with a hard look. She nods.

“Come on, everyone, let’s find our table,” Makoto calls down to the rest of the Phantom Thieves, who were all in their little groups with the rest of the SO. Ryuji looks up from his and Chie’s conversation as Futaba’s sharp jittering from her glee stops to a halt. She lowers her gaze, meeting their eyes. “Akira will meet with us later.”

With that, Akira leaves his Thieves to their own bidding. They know what to do.

“Happy birthday, Akira. I’m sure you’ve gotten this greeting many times over the course of the evening,” she says with a small smile as they walk to their own table.

“Tell me about it,” he grouses. Mitsuru shakes her head before she leans in a little more.

“The third table on your right. You see them, don’t you?” Steel eyes drift to said table. Black suited men sat with one singular white suited man at the table, either talking amongst each other or looking around the venue. And next to the man with the white suit was a very familiar puffy haired girl wearing a sparkling purple dress. “Okumura Haru’s very own guard.”

“Who’s the dude in the white?” Akira asks. His question gets answered not by Mitsuru, but by the man reaching over and holding Haru’s hand. “Wait, is that Haru’s fiancé?”

“The very same. I have seen Sugimura on and off, but I didn’t know he was engaged to Okumura.” Mitsuru turns just enough that she looks like she’s not looking directly at them. Waving a butler over, she picks up a glass of water from the tray. Akira picks one up as well and they both inconspicuously watch Haru’s table from their point of view. It’s a good thing Akira had a natural darkness affinity. It made their spying that much easier. “So tell me, Akira. Are you planning on targeting Okumura Kunikazu?”

“Well, I wonder where you heard _that_ from. It was Souji-senpai who recommended for Futaba to look in to him,” he remarks. Sipping his water, he watches Sugimura pull Haru’s hand and kiss the back of her hand. She flinches but does no more. Even from three tables away, Sugimura looks like the sort of person that deserves a kick in the balls to wipe that disgusting smile off his face. Akira faintly hears a clatter from one of the far tables, but nothing’s shattered, so that’s a plus. Mitsuru purses her lips, humming.

“The Phantom Aficionado Website has become quite famous.” She fiddles with her glass, rubbing it with her fingers every time the outside mists over. “While I’m not Shirogane, one would have to be a fool to not realize that the Aficionado Website is the only means of communication between the requesters and the requestees. That poll of yours has also garnered much attention.”

“Let me be the first to say it wasn’t my idea.” And yeah, he’s still not over the moon about there being a poll in the first place, but he knows Mishima works hard on implementing new features in the Phansite, so he keeps it to himself.

“Are you planning on following the poll?” she asks.

“No.” And Mitsuru’s fingers still. “While we have been told about Okumura’s misgivings, we won’t go after him just because the public wants us to. That’s not how we work.” Akira crosses his legs and curls his hands on the table. He’s still watching Sugimura, who had put Haru’s hand down, but now the man is just talking to one of the bodyguards at the table. Haru sits completely ignored.

She looks alone. It’s a painfully familiar scene.

“All of our targets had been involved with one of our own,” Akira continues, “Kamoshida abused Ann, Ryuji, Mishima, and Shiho. Madarame abused Yusuke, early enough in his life that he didn’t even realize it was abuse until we told him. Makoto was blackmailed by Kaneshiro. We only were able to take down Medjed after we dealt with Futaba’s Palace.”

“Palace?” A note of alarm filters into Mitsuru’s voice. It’s slight, but it’s there. “When you mentioned targets, you never said one of your own had one.”

Akira shakes his head. “I couldn’t say, not when Yosuke-senpai was in the room.” He lowers his eyes and he frowns deeply, eyebrows furrowing slightly. “When we first met Futaba, she wasn’t in the right mind. It really isn’t my place to say what happened to her, but I can say that I can relate to what she went through.”

“Then, why only narrow your potential targets to ones your friends are involved with?” Thank goodness for the topic change. Knowing Mitsuru, she knew not to pry anymore. “That seems bias and counterproductive to your wish to change society.”

“I see your point, and it is bias, but we had chosen our targets on our own volition. While many of our big targets do coincide with our newer members, we don’t give a damn what targets the public wants.” All the Phantom Thieves had their will to choose taken away from them before they awakened. It was their turn to pick and choose who to send to the chopping block.

“What if it interferes with your popularity?”

“The Thieves and I had this conversation already. Fame’s cool and all, but it doesn’t mean shit if your turn into playthings for the public to enjoy. We won’t be taken seriously if the people just think we’ll listen to everything they want. We do what we want.”

Mitsuru chuckles before sipping down the rest of the water. She sighs, “Then I suppose that’s that?” Akira nods.

“What happened to that rule of not meddling with another Wild Card’s business, Mitsuru-senpai?” he snarks, leering at her playfully. She rolls her eyes at him.

“They were merely questions. Now,” she stands, and the butlers nearly immediately rush in to take the empty glasses. “go join your friends. I have business to take care of.” Akira can already tell what’s going to happen, for she waltzes her way over to Haru’s table. Haru looks up, while Sugimura leers at her less like a person and more like a snack (disgusting—). The guards all tense around the table, but Akira spies Akihiko strolling past. Chie and Yukiko talk their way towards the table. Ryoji, with Rise in tow, start a light conversation nearby. And he knows they all have pistols—a sleek silver design—hidden in view or in plain sight depending on who they are, ready to aim and fire at a moment’s notice.

Akira hums and stands up from the table, pulling his phone from his pocket. He knows she’ll be okay. Now, on to the actual business…

 

**Kurusu Akira → Morgana**

**Kurusu Akira** : Morgana, I’m leaving it to you.

**Morgana** : You can count on me.

 

There were a lot of advantages to having a cat body, Morgana admits. Say, for example, sneaking around Madarame’s house to look for the door they had to unlock. Or looking around Futaba’s room before any of the Thieves actually met her. Or, like now, spying on a meeting that wasn’t supposed to be happening but was only happening because of blackmail. 

“Nothing conclusive right now,” Morgana mumbles, barely loud enough for the microphone in his collar to pick up. “Just a bunch of business stuff.”

“ _What kind?_ ” asks Akira. There’s some shuffling on his end and he hears Ryuji say something, but it’s indiscernable. From behind a large velvet curtain, Mograna peeks around it enough to see the people there. Of course, there was Haru and Mitsuru, but Haru’s entire swath of bodyguards including the white suited man was there too. Was Haru’s dad that paranoid to send half a dozen guys and her fiancé to a simple meeting? On Mitsuru’s side, only Minato and Souji stand near her. More than enough, according to Akira.

“Okumura wants the Kirijo Group to support him when he decides to start campaigning to become a politician.”

“ _A politician?_ ” Ann asks, surprised. “ _Business owners can do that?_ ”

“ _It isn’t impossible,_ ” Makoto replies curtly. Akira voices an affirmation too.

“Okumura also wants the Kirijo Group’s help to fund some projects because of their technological advancements,” Morgana relays. “Says they’re the best possible people for the job.”

“ _They’re not wrong…_ ” Akira trails off.

“My father had been curious about a project he heard about. Something about an accident ten years ag—”

Mitsuru abruptly shatters her tea cup between her fingers. Morgana’s eyes widen. The pieces fall to the floor, some of them covered with frost. Haru had gasped and the guards around had immediately reacted with their hands on their holsters, but Mitsuru had gone still. Silent.

“ _Morgana? What’s going on?_ ” The Phantom Thieves clamor on the other side of the call, worried and frenzied when he stopped talking.

“Shush!” he hisses into the speaker before pricking his ears in the direction of the table. Souji and Minato still stand there, nonplussed, but there’s a noticeable current of magic running through the air, arching off their person in barely restrained… something. Anger? Grief? What is it?

“That,” Mitsuru’s voice is coated with venom dripping from every word, her tone frosty, “is something that you do not need to know.” And the white suited man, Sugimura, Akira tells him, laughs. It sounds like nails against chalkboard coupled with the screams of the damned clawing their way around Mementos.

“Need I remind you of our agreement?” he asks haughtily. “You are supposed to answer ever question we ask or else that family member of yours gets it.” Morgana can’t see his face, but if Mitsuru’s more disgruntled face is anything to say, he’s probably making a face that deserves to be clawed.

Suddenly, Haru shakes her head. “You don’t need to answer it. That question doesn’t have to do anything with the business. It was merely to sate my Father’s curiosity.” She moves around in her seat. Morgana notes how both Minato and Souji momentarily watch her, but don’t do a thing. Instead, they keep their eyes on Haru’s guards. “Despite our differences, I truly believe we could establish a great collaboration if we work together, so—”

“Haru, don’t try to reason with her,” Sugimura sharply cuts off, waving his hand around. Morgana’s fur stands on end. The call has gone silent, but none of them have dropped it. “She won’t listen to you if you keep insisting on peaceful negotiation. We don’t need to do that, since we have dirt on her, we can make her listen to us.”

The guards around them nod in agreement. Morgana narrows his eyes at them. Disgusting humans. Were all their means as foul as their persons? He sure as hell isn’t a gross human like them, he had standards and the Phantom Thieves. Speaking of the Phantom Thieves, Akira’s saying some very choice words he can’t understand, but he hears Ryuji soothe him, so there wasn’t much to worry about.

“So, these are the infamous business practices I hear about? Blackmailing people to use for their own selfish gain?” Mitsuru inquires, narrowing her eyes at them. Haru looks like she’s trying to say something, but Sugimura butts in again. Oh, what Morgana wouldn’t just to jump out of hiding…

“Selfish gain? This is all for the growth of the company, Kirijo-san. I’m sure you understand.”

“I would never use such backhanded tactics for the sake of the company. It isn’t right.”

“You wouldn’t but are you sure your father didn’t?” And frost bursts onto the couch she’s sitting on.

“ _Oh no, he did not—_ ” Akira’s voice burst out panicked. “ _Mitsuru-senpai’s father is a very sensitive subject for her—that goddamn asshole—_ ”

“Sugimura-san.” Minato’s voice slices through. He stares down Sugimura with a look, but Morgana can feel the crackle of power laced within, ready to burst out and char him to ashes. “This meeting is over.”

“It’s over when I say it’s—”

“It’s over when _I_ say it’s over,” Haru cleanly cut off as she stands up. She bows to Mitsuru with a small smile. “Thank you for your time, Kirijo-san. I honestly wish we met at a more convenient time.”

“I can’t exactly say it’s fine, but I do share your sentiments.” Mitsuru replies, sighing and rubbing her temples. Minato hands her a cup of water. Huh. Where did that come from? “Come, let us return to the party. I know you would like to spend time with your friends.”

“Ah yes—” Haru starts following Mitsuru out the door, but Sugimura sharply stops her with a call of her name. Haru pales, stopping rigidly. “Oh, I will be there soon. I just need to discuss some things with my fiancé.” Even she flinches a little when she refers to Sugimura. Ouch.

Mitsuru leaves them alone after glancing at the curtain Morgana was hiding in—so she did know. Morgana moves to follow her out, slinking from behind the curtain as quietly as he could.

Then Sugimura grabs Haru’s arm.

* * *

 

“What the hell was that, Haru? What are you doing, embarrassing me in front of business partners?!” Sugimura hisses at Haru, face twisted into a sneer.

“I didn’t mean—”

“Don’t lie to me.” His grip tightens around her arm enough that she knows it will bruise. He pulls her closer to him, enough that she can feel his breath ghost her ear. She freezes. “I see you need to be punished again, huh, Haru?” No no no, stop it—

He reaches around to pull her closer, but she pushes against him as much as she can, even if he’s taller, even if he’s stronger, even if her father wants her to be in love with him, she can’t—

“Come on, aren’t we supposed to be fiancés?” he asks innocently. He didn’t have an innocent bone in his body. “Your father would say that it’s wonderful for you to service me. Doing your best to satisfy your soon-to-be husband after all.” Haru squeezes her eyes shut, shaking her head. She hates this. She hates being chained down like this. But, if her father wants her to be a good fiancé, then… “Good girl.”

Suddenly, Sugimura lets go with a yell and Haru stumbles back and away from him, surprised. What—

A cat’s latching onto his leg, hissing viciously while tearing through Sugimura’s pants. She’s seen this cat before. It’s Akira’s pet cat, Morgana. She remembers Akira showing pictures of his cat to her when they all went to the beach, gushing about how cute he is and his deep love for sushi and for hanging out with the Phantom Thieves. He’s a cute little thing, but that cute little thing was trying to make Sugimura into mince meat.

“You goddamn feline—” Sugimura tries kicking Morgana off, but he leaps off of his leg before his other leg can connect. He races to Haru before stopping in front of her, hissing, like he was trying to protect her. All the while, the strange tag on his collar blinks red, like it was less a tag and more of a screen—

No, it was a screen. And it was calling for backup.

Sugimura growls at him. All the guards around them (they let him do hat he wanted with her, they didn’t care what happened to her only what happened to Sugimura) converge and, to Haru’s horror, some pull out guns and aim them at Morgana. Morgana stands tall through it all. “Who’s feral cat is this? I have half the mind to tell the guards to shoot you and say it was out of self defense—”

“No!” Haru reaches down and picks Morgana up in her arms. He meows, pawing around in her hold, but he doesn’t try to jump off. Instead, he cranes his head to where Sugimura was holding her and stares at the red skin of the forming bruise. “I won’t let you hurt him!” She won’t let him lay a finger on him as much as she could. Even though it truly wasn’t much, she didn’t want Akira’s cat to get caught in something like this.

And then the door slams open.

“Morgana!” Akira rushes in, looking frazzled behind his glasses. Sugimura stops and the guards with their guns out hastily put their guns back in their holsters. It wasn’t fast enough, Haru notices, when both Makoto and Ryuji glance at the guards for a moment.

Morgana meows loudly before jumping out of Haru’s arms to pad his way over to his owner. Akira kneels down, whispering some things she can’t hear from where she’s standing as Makoto and Ann make their way over to her. Ryuji and Yusuke lean over to talk to Morgana as well while Futaba instead watches all of them from near the door.

“Thank you so much, Haru, for holding onto Morgana for us,” Makoto sighs relieved.

“Were you looking for him?” she asks. Ann nods.

“He had gone missing a while back, so we all went looking for him. It was a good thing Futaba put a tracking device on his collar! We would’ve been searching for so much longer!”

“Well, I’m glad he’s safe with you, Haru,” Makoto comments. Haru stomps down what might have happened—Sugimura kicking Morgana, Morgana getting injured, Morgana getting shot—deep within her. No, she doesn’t need to think about that anymore.

“Yes, I’m glad he’s safe as well!” she chimes, happily. From nearby, Sugimura sputters, indignant.

“Control your goddamn pet!” he yells, glaring at Akira, who now had Morgana resting on his shoulder, “I don’t know what you do to your pets, but this one is obviously feral!”

“Hm, he’s usually so well behaved,” Akira comments. He reaches up to scratch behind Morgana’s ear and the cat purrs loudly. “You might have done something that he didn’t like.” He levels him with a look. Haru can’t glean much from it since Makoto and Ann immediate pull her towards the door, talking about how they should get back to the party. Well, with business one for now, they should be returning!

Thank goodness for Makoto and her friends.

(She doesn’t notice how Makoto and Ann herd her outside the room as fast of possible, while also interrupting Sugimura at any given time. She doesn’t notice Akira, Ryuji, and Yusuke forming a barrier behind the girls, glaring every which way to make sure Sugimura stays put.

She doesn’t notice every one of the Phantom Thieves come to a resolve.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Behind a house that now only houses one occupant stands a tall tree. The tree arches over a small field of flowers surrounding two small gravestones, embedded within the field. Gifts and presents surround one such gravestone, a picture standing on top of it. It's a picture of a family. There are two boys, identical in everything except for the glasses on one of their noses, the boy with glasses smiling while his brother is grinning. Behind them, their parents smile brightly at the camera, hugging their sons from behind.
> 
> A tall man kneels down as he places one more present amongst the bunch, this one with stickers taped all across the wrapping from his son and his son's friends from Tokyo with messages. "Akira says he's sorry he can't be here, but he made sure I was going to give you his present when it was the 15th there." He gingerly rests his hand on the gravestone, smiling as much as he can. "Happy birthday, Ren."
> 
> * * *
> 
> Note note, I'm going on vacation for much of August! I'm not going on hiatus since I will be working on this whenever I feel like it, but now that I've finally gone through my biggest hurdle, it's time to get to business!


	17. he's dead jim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very short transitional chapter of sorts. The Hawaii arc is over and we return to Japan. Things have happened while they were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha 17 was supposed to be 3000+ words but then I realized it was going too fast so I shaved off 2/3 of it. And dropped some bombshells at the end hohoho.
> 
> It might look a little wonky. Worked on it at different times.

**Hawaii: September 16, 2016 (Noon)**  
**Japan: September 17, 2016 (Morning)**  
  
**Phantom Thieves**  
  
**Mona** : So we’re doing it?  
**Mona** : We’re going after Okumura?  
  
**Fox** : There is no doubt we will.  
**Fox** : If we are to save Haru from what will undoubtedly be her eventual demise, we must act with haste.  
  
**Skull** : If that asshole’s in her dad’s Palace, I wanna be the first one to smash his face in!  
  
**Panther** : Says you, Queen’s going to crush his balls before you even get a say in.  
  
**Joker** : She has a point.  
  
**Queen** : Panther is correct.  
**Queen** : Once I get my hands on him, he will have no family jewels nor a recognizable face to distinguish him from the rest of the foul minded elitists.  
  
**Skull** : Holy fucking shit.  
  
**Queen** : I will leave you the rest of his body, though.  
  
**Skull** : Sweet!  
  
**Joker** : I’ve taken the initiative to check if Okumura has a Palace.  
**Joker** : He definitely has one.  
  
**Queen** : Have you figured out the location or the distortion?  
  
**Joker** : I kind of guessed a bunch of times.  
  
**Panther** : When have we not?  
  
**Joker** : It’s at Okumura Foods Headquarters. Makes sense, right?  
**Joker** : I didn’t get the distortion though. Nothing checked out.  
  
**Queen** : As much as we know his crimes, we don’t know how he really is.  
**Queen** : We could focus more on that when we get home.  
  
**Skull** : Yeah! Come on guys, we’ve got technically one more day until we leave, wanna hang out?  
  
**Oracle** : Pass.  
**Oracle** : Too much sun exposure in the past 48 hours.  
**Oracle** : I need to recharge.  
  
**Panther** : I have to agree, I just want to rest.  
  
**Fox** : I will take the opportunity to explore the complex more.  
**Fox** : There are some rather fascinating murals I would like sketch for further reference.  
  
**Skull** : Oh.  
**Skull** : Hey Joker, can I raid your room?  
  
**Joker** : Be my guest.  
**Joker** : But you’ll have to be quiet. Mishima was working on something earlier and he kind of just fell asleep.  
  
**Skull** : Sure thing.  
**Skull** : Be there in 5!

**Hawaii: September 18, 2016 (Morning)**  
Japan: September 19, 2016 (Early Morning)  
  
Shirogane Naoto — > Kurusu Akira  
  
**Shirogane Naoto** : Akira.  
  
**Kurusu Akira** : Naoto-senpai please.  
**Kurusu Akira** : It’s late.  
**Kurusu Akira** : Early?  
**Kurusu Akira** : Ugh.  
  
**Shirogane Naoto** : As much I know you’re suffering from jet lag, this is important.  
**Shirogane Naoto** : Check the news.  
  
**Kurusu Akira** : ?  
**Kurusu Akira** : O FUCK  
  
  
**September 19, 2016 (Noon)**  
  
→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : MOTHERFUCKERS SHIT WENT DOWN BACK AT HOME

**fists on wheels** : Oh god, I have to work right after we came back...

**strawberry shortcake** : What're we going to do? They said it was a suicide, but the camera footage...

**super fluffy** : It's just as Naoto-senpai told me.  That's what a mental shutdown looks like  
**super fluffy** : To see someone die so brutally...

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i cant believe that shits for real  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : police said he died from walkin in front of a car yeah

**mints** : yeah

**super fluffy** : Are you here to give us the actual details

**mints** : Naoto sent me  
**mints** : i can't tell you much since she's still looking into it  
**mints** : he died walking to the police station  
**mints** : bleeding from the eyes nose and mouth  
**mints** : you can guess from the footage they showed on television that it was definitely no suicide

**fists on wheels** : So, if this is a mental shutdown, then could we presume someone caused it?

**mints** : that's for us to find out

**Sets** : Minato.

**mints** : yeah yeah i know  
**mints** : don't treat me like a child seta i know what i'm doing

**super fluffy** : What

**Sets** : It was said once already. You aren't privy to what we do as much as we aren't involved in your thievery.  
**Sets** : That journey's all on you.  
**Sets** : We're just helping you get there.

**super fluffy** : And this is helping how

**mints** : stop getting emotional and focus  
**mints** : there's one friend of yours that hasn't been talking

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : futaba?  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : r u doin good?

**super fluffy** : @yeet  
**super fluffy** : @yeet

**yeet** : video call now  
**yeet** : i dont give a fuck if u were busy we need to talk now  
**yeet** : long story short  
**yeet** : it looked familiar  
**yeet** : dont u dare make me say none of u are dumb even if u think so  
**yeet** : Video call. Now.

* * *

**shihohoho** : oh goodness.

**mints** : hey shiho  
  
**shihohoho** : hello arisato-san!  
**shihohoho** : i was going to ask if the phantom thieves are alright, but from what i can tell they aren't.  
  
**mints** : you missed some stuff  
  
**shihohoho** : i can tell.  
**shihohoho** : what happened?  
**shihohoho** : someone died, right? who?  
  
**mints** : their principal died  
  
**shihohoho** : oh no.  
  
**mints** : ruled as a suicide but according to what the police found it looks like he suffered from a mental breakdown  
  
**shihohoho** : what?!  
  
**mints** : so yes hence the panic  
  
**shihohoho** : where are they?  
shihohoho: they're all offline!

mints: i assume they're still in their video call  
**mints** : they've been offline since  
  
**shihohoho** : oh that makes sense.  
  
**mishimoon** : GOOD MORNING  
**mishimoon** : EVERYONE  
**mishimoon** : I HAVEN’T SLEPT SINCE WE LANDED  
**mishimoon** : JET LAG IS NONEXISTENT  
**mishimoon** : PRINCIPAL KOBAYAKAWA IS DEAD  
**mishimoon** : PARDON MY LANGUAGE BUT  
**mishimoon** : FUCK  
  
**shihohoho** : yuuki!  
**shihohoho** : what are you doing awake?!  
  
**mishimoon** : WOKRING  
**mishimoon** : WORKING  
  
**mints** : mishima stop working and go to sleep  
  
**mishimoon** : CAN’T  
**mishimoon** : THERE’S A LOT HAPPENING  
**mishimoon** : I WAS HOPING THE PT WOULD BE HERE BUT THAT’S FINE  
****  
**mints** : leave your rant here for them to find  
  
**mishimoon** : YES I SHOULD DO THAT  
**mishimoon** : TRAFFIC ON THE SITE INCREASED A FEW HOURS BEFORE HIS DEATH WAS MADE PUBLIC  
**mishimoon** : PEOPLE CAME FLOODING IN TO SPEAK THEIR MINDS AND DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT WAS HAPPENING  
**mishimoon** : A LOT OF ANONS CAME FORWARD SAYING HOW MUCH PRINCIPAL KOBAYAKAWA DESERVED DYING  
**mishimoon** : I HAD TO STAY UP TO FILTER OUT THOSE ANONS AND ANYMORE DEMANDING THE DEATH OF MORE PEOPLE  
**mishimoon** : SOME THINK THE PHANTOM THIEVES ARE THE REASON HE DIED  
**mishimoon** : SOME THINK HE DIED BECAUSE OF A CHANGE OF HEART  
  
**shihohoho** : oh god they're all online now

**mints** : god these kids can’t have a break can they  
  
  
**Phantom Thieves**  
  
**Queen** : Take the rest of the morning off. We will need to rest.  
**Queen** : Whatever repercussions happen due to Principal Kobayakawa’s death and how that could affect us should be discussed after school tomorrow.  
**Queen** : For now, do your best to ward off jet lag.  
**Queen** : If need be, if Joker would be so kind to prepare coffee in the morning?  
  
**Joker** : Got you covered.  
**Joker** : And don’t worry Skull, I’ll prepare the sweet blend too.

  
  
**Okumura Haru → Niijima Makoto**  
  
**Okumura Haru** : makoto, can i talk to you?  
**Okumura Haru** : i know we’re all tired but  
**Okumura Haru** : i need someone to talk to i can’t handle this by myself right now  
**Okumura Haru** : i can't pretend you didn’t notice what happened during the party  
**Okumura Haru** : with my fiancé and all before you burst into the room i saw your eyes you were looking at the guards  
**Okumura Haru** : please i need someone to talk to  
**Okumura Haru** : makoto?  
**Okumura Haru** : oh, you must be sleeping.  
**Okumura Haru** : i should stop bothering you then.

 

_ <“Okumura is obsolete. If the Phantom Thieves play their part, then he will no longer be a problem for you.” _

_..._

_"Yes, everything is going according to plan. The Shadow Operatives made sure of that."_

_..._

_"Don't worry, they know the deal. If they try anything, they know what they're risking."_

_..._

_"But isn't that the fun part? Dangling what they've missed for so long right in front of them, watching them obey your every whim and command, until you tear it away from them again?"_

_..._

_"Ahaha, I must agree. My sense of humor isn't for the weaker souls."_

_..._

_"Yes, I will report soon."_

_..._

_"Good-bye, Father." > _

 

**You have 1 voicemail.**

**> Listen? Y/N**

"Hey, I'll be coming home late once again. The recent case on another mental shutdown has me rooted in the office, I'm afraid. Don't worry, some people in the office are watching over my coffee intake. I'll be sure to finish my homework as well. Rest up, alright? I'll see you again in a few hours. I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now we're getting into the stuff I've been planning during the long breaks between chapters. Ohoho, this'll be fun.
> 
> And yes, that's a significant other right there. The backstory of this entire fic is vast and wide. He'll get revealed eventually.


	18. how do you feel without coffee? depresso.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morning morning, Phantom Thieves! Have some chatter and the plot moving. Also, Haru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting this while waiting to board my plane. Home, here I come!
> 
> (I'm being real here that accident in Manila's airport it delayed my flight hardcore now I'm going home two days late aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa)

**September 20, 2016 (Morning)**  
  
**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**  
  
**super fluffy** : Morning morning my gay band of thieves  
  
**yeet** : morn  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : mornin!!  
  
**shihohoho** : i hope everyone was able to rest!  
  
**super fluffy** : I got enough rest to last the day. God knows we’ll need it

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : same  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i knocked out as soon as i got home  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : my pillow was callin my goddamn name dude

 **super fluffy** : Same  
**super fluffy** : I think Sojiro was there when I got home  
**super fluffy** : He just laughed at me

 **yeet** : granted i would laugh at u too if u stumbled into my coffee shop looking ready to keel over and eat dirt babbling about how nice ryuji’s ass looked like in swim shorts

 **super fluffy** : Wow

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : should i be flattered or

 **yeet** : i dunno  
**yeet** : jet lagged akiras weak for anything that starts with ryu and ends with ji

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : jet lagged akira is a blessing

 **yeet** : amen

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : amen

 **super fluffy** : Hey what the fuck  
**super fluffy** : Jet lagged me shouldn’t be praised  
**super fluffy** : I have no control over my mouth when I’m jet lagged

 **yeet** : and thats y talking to u jet lagged is an adventure  
**yeet** : thank god i have it on record

 **super fluffy** : You wouldn’t

 **yeet** : :3c

 **super fluffy** : Fuck

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : how many pieces of my soul does it cost to get my hands on a copy of that recording

 **yeet** : dont even try sakamoto i know uve sold ur soul to living forever w ur disgusting boyfriend  
**yeet** : ur soul is worthless to me

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : damn

 **super fluffy** : While that’s super sweet Ryu please don’t try selling your soul to Futaba

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : been there done that babe anyways

 **super fluffy** : What

 **graphic design is my passion** : Good morning, everyone.

 **super fluffy** : Hey Yusuke

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : mornin yusuke!!

 **yeet** : sup boo

 **graphic design is my passion** : Hello.  
**graphic design is my passion** : If it isn’t too much of a bother, might I ask for someone to come to my dorms for a little while?  
**graphic design is my passion** : In my drowsy haste to reach my bed, I may have spilled some of my paints on the floor.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : !!!!!!! dude!!

 **super fluffy** : Don’t you leave your paints out when you’re planning on using them  
**super fluffy** : Were you planning on painting as soon as you got to your dorm

 **graphic design is my passion** : Of course.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Motivation and inspiration may come at even the most vexing of times. I found it imprudent to waste my time sleeping when I could be giving life to our adventures and experiences in art.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : “waste my time sleeping”  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : yusuke how do u even function

 **super fluffy** : I’m guessing through sheer force of will and bean sprouts

 **yeet** : dont forget about jagariko

 **super fluffy** : And Jagariko

 **yeet** : i could come over if u need me to inari  
**yeet** : ive got ur address and a swiss army knife i snatched from akis room in case anyone tries to snatch me  
**yeet** : cleaning paints shouldn’t be harder than platinum completing an rpg

 **super fluffy** : That’s where it went  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : That would be much appreciated.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Please also pick up food. All the food in my refrigerator is finished and there is only an expired carton of milk.

 **super fluffy** : Your boyfriend is a fucking disaster Futaba

 **yeet** : i know  
**yeet** : isn’t he such a delight

 **super fluffy** : Speaking of delights do you guys know where Ann is  
**super fluffy** : She’s usually online  
  
**shihohoho** : ann’s in the bathroom right now.  
  
**super fluffy** : How did you know that  
  
**shihohoho** : we were video chatting before she went to the bathroom.

 **super fluffy** : Do I have to put on the Maximum Gay Detector™ because that’s sus

 **shihohoho** : no we didn’t do anything, you dirty minded fool.  
**shihohoho** : we just had our normal morning call!  
**shihohoho** : the dirty stuff’s off book. ;)

 **super fluffy** : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **shihohoho** : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : alright kiddies keep it in ur pants its too early for that shit

 **shihohoho** : pot meet kettle but okay.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : wow

 **super fluffy** : Anyway I’m going over to the coffee machine rn  
**super fluffy** : How many thermoses do I need to fill  
  
**yeet** : one for me  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I as well.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ditto  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sweet blend pls  
  
**super fluffy** : Of course  
  
**shihohoho** : how much will you charge to bring coffee over here in inaba?  
**shihohoho** : i’ve heard rumors of your delicious coffee and i want in!  
  
**super fluffy** : I would teleport a thermos to you if I could  
**super fluffy** : I’ll contact one of the senpais to see if they’re heading down to Inaba anytime soon  
**super fluffy** : Preferences?  
  
**shihohoho** : 2 milk 3 sugars.  
  
**super fluffy** : How sweet  
  
**shihohoho** : it has to be when ann’s your girlfriend!  
**shihohoho** : i’m gonna go for a bit, gotta get everything i need for school!  
  
**super fluffy** : Sure… ;) ;)  
  
**shihohoho** : :3c  
  
**super fluffy** : Real quick can someone check on Mishima bc I saw that rant yesterday and I am Worried™  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : permission to flood his messages with memes  
  
**super fluffy** : Granted  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : brb  
  
**yeet** : y r u trusting ryuji w memes y didnt u ask me  
  
**super fluffy** : Mishima’s not ready for your kind of memes Futaba  
**super fluffy** : He is innocent  
  
**yeet** : says u but if he can program and manage a website hes definitely seen some shit  
**yeet** : from one computer guru to another  
**yeet** : hes ready for my memes  
  
**super fluffy** : :/  
  
**yeet** : doubter  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : You have rather exquisite taste, Futaba.  
**graphic design is my passion** : I don’t believe anyone is ready for your caliber of memeage, for the material you have gather seems to originate from various corners of the internet.  
**graphic design is my passion** : It’s immensely fascinating.  
  
**super fluffy** : You did not  
  
**yeet** : :)  
  
**super fluffy** : Sakura Futaba  
**super fluffy** : DId you actually show Yusuke your meme collection  
  
**yeet** : yeah  
**yeet** : but before u say anything u gotta remember something  
**yeet** : inaris weird  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : How rude.  
  
**yeet** : and he came up w art reviews for the more artistic looking memes  
**yeet** : by artistic looking i mean surreal  
**yeet** : its right up his alley  
  
**super fluffy** : If I were Makoto I would be chewing you out so hard  
**super fluffy** : But I’m not  
**super fluffy** : Delightful Futaba  
  
**yeet** : i aim to please  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : And aim to get your butt kicked  
  
**yeet** : She return  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : I’m back!  
  
**super fluffy** : Hey there  
**super fluffy** : Ann do you require the caffeine  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Only if you put fifty billion sugars in mine  
  
**super fluffy** : But of course  
**super fluffy** : @CATCH THESE HANDS how’s that wakeup call going  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : mishima just told me how weak these memes r im  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shook  
  
**yeet** : see  
**yeet** : need i remind u he manages a site  
**yeet** : he sees shitty memes on the reg  
  
**mishimoon** : Can confirm.  
  
**super fluffy** : Sup Mishima  
  
**mishimoon** : Morning, Kurusu!  
  
**super fluffy** : You need some caf  
  
**mishimoon** : It’s fine, I have coffee at home.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Stop right there Mishima  
**strawberry shortcake** : You haven’t tasted real coffee until you’ve tasted Leblanc’s  
**strawberry shortcake** : Especially Akira’s special sweet blend!  
**strawberry shortcake** : If heaven was a drink that’s what it would be  
  
**super fluffy** : Hey I made that especially for Ryuji  
**super fluffy** : I had to test that shit after hours  
**super fluffy** : It’s a good thing Sojiro actually likes it  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : thanks babe!!!  
  
**super fluffy** : Np love  
  
**mishimoon** : I’ll have some then! Just whatever you recommend.  
**mishimoon** : Thank you so much, Kurusu!  
  
**super fluffy** : No need for thanks you work really hard  
**super fluffy** : How was managing the site yesterday  
  
**mishimoon** : If I didn’t go to sleep when I was told, I would still be awake!  
  
**super fluffy** : Oh wow  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Is managing a website really that difficult?  
  
**mishimoon** : It is if it’s the Phantom Thieves “official” site.  
**mishimoon** : Especially ever since that poll came up, there’s been a lot of people going to site.  
**mishimoon** : Speaking of the poll, I pulled it off of the home page. It’s not there anymore.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Good riddance. No offense  
  
**mishimoon** : Haha none taken!  
**mishimoon** : I didn’t expect there to be so many people to vote anyway.  
**mishimoon** : I know there were a lot of people who didn’t like big companies, but for there to be this massive response to make Okumura have a change of heart? It was weird.  
  
**yeet** : u look into it  
  
**mishimoon** : Of course.  
**mishimoon** : I’m not the site’s dedicated administrator for nothing!  
  
**super fluffy** : Did you find anything  
  
**mishimoon** : I’m not a top of the line hacker, but I did notice some things were different when I checked the source code.  
**mishimoon** : I don’t know what, but the site’s been tampered with.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : for real??????  
  
**yeet** : i’ll look at it when i can  
  
**super fluffy** : That would be appreciated  
**super fluffy** : Good work, Mishima  
  
**mishimoon** : Thanks, Kurusu!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : dude u kno u dont have to call us by our last names  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : hold up we dont call u by ur first name  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : we even call souji-san and minato-san by their first names  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : !!!!! You’re right!!  
  
**mishimoon** : You guys don’t have to! I call you by your last names because it’s polite!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : well fine if u wanna call us that be my guest but do u mind if we call u by ur first name  
  
**mishimoon** : I don’t mind!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : u sure  
  
**mishimoon** : I’m certain.  
**mishimoon** : Everyone calls me Mishima anyway, it’s not like it’s common to call me Yuuki.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Alright then, Yuuki it is!!  
  
**super fluffy** : Yuuki~  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : yuuki  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : It seems we are finally on equal footing, Yuuki.  
  
**mishimoon** : Omg I haven’t seen my name typed so many times it looks foreign to me.  
  
**yeet** : aw man but i cant call you an npc anymore uve become a player character congrats  
  
**mishimoon** : Nice!  
  
**super fluffy** : Quick question has anyone seen Makoto  
**super fluffy** : She hasn’t been online since last night  
  
**fists on wheels** : I’m sorry, I was busy.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Makoto!  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : mornin mako!!  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Good morning, Makoto.  
  
**yeet** : heya queen  
  
**fists on wheels** : Good morning, everyone.  
  
**mishimoon** : Makoto-senpai! Is it alright to call you that?  
  
**fists on wheels** : It’s fine.  
  
**super fluffy** : How many thermoses do you need today  
  
**fists on wheels** : Just one.  
  
**super fluffy** : Sure thing  
**super fluffy** : It’s not like you to ignore the chat for so long  
**super fluffy** : You’re usually so worried we’re all going to get arrested if ever someone gets a warrant to check our phones  
  
**fists on wheels** : Something came up.  
**fists on wheels** : Haru contacted me yesterday and I was only able to get back to her earlier this morning.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Haru!  
**strawberry shortcake** : Is she doing okay?  
  
**fists on wheels** : I wish I could say so.  
**fists on wheels** : Yuuki-kun.  
  
**mishimoon** : Yes, Makoto-senpai?  
  
**fists on wheels** : I backread everything already. Keep an eye out for any changes in the site and manage all those who are calling for more deaths, if you can.  
**fists on wheels** : I would tell you in the Phantom Thieves’ official chat, but…  
  
**mishimoon** : It’s fine, I understand.  
**mishimoon** : It’s not like anyone here doesn’t know who the Phantom Thieves are.  
  
**shihohoho** : he’s right.  
  
**Sets** : He’s got a point.  
  
**mints** : mm  
  
**super fluffy** : Go back to adulting, Souji-senpai, Minato-senpai  
**super fluffy** : And go back to whatever you were doing Shiho  
  
**shihohoho** : sure.  
  
**mishimoon** : I’ll keep an eye out!  
  
**fists on wheels** : The rest of us, we’ll meet Haru.  
**fists on wheels** : She wants all the Phantom Thieves to meet at LeBlanc after school. There’s something important she wants to talk about.  
  
**super fluffy** : Alrighty thieves you know what to do then  
**super fluffy** : Yusuke, I’ll give yours to you at Shibuya  
**super fluffy** : Futaba’s taken hers already so that someone taken care of  
**super fluffy** : The rest of you meet me in front of the school gates  
**super fluffy** : And please don’t be late this time  
**super fluffy** : I think Ushimaru suspects me of doing something illegal  
  
**mints** : oho  
  
**super fluffy** : Minato-senpai before you even try he’s just a teacher there’s no need to rain vengeance  
  
**mints** : oho  
  
**super fluffy** : Senpai  
  
  
  
**September 20, 2016 (Afternoon)**  
  
There had been many things Okumura Haru expected when she walked into LeBlanc that day. Her father’s words still lingered in mind, each word a pike stabbing into her body, trapping her to this expectation and so called destiny. She was lost. She hadn’t an inkling what to do now that her father, the man who had raised and molded her into a perfect trophy daughter, sold her life to her betrothed, to a man she hated even though his standing in society was amongst the elite.  
  
But what was she expecting, from the man who treated his workers like dogs?  
  
She turned to Makoto out of desperation. She never had a friend before. At least, she never had a friend who looked past her wealth. Even after Makoto found out, she continued to be friends with her. Even her friends became friends with her, all of them treating her like she was an equal to them and not someone to put on a pedestal.  
  
Haru had to admit, Akira’s birthday party was probably the most fun she had in a party in a long, long time.  
  
But now… would Makoto and her friends really continue to support her after what she was going to them?  
  
When she sat down in Akira’s room, with all of her friends (she can consider all of them, not just Makoto, her friends now, right?), would they listen and help her?  
  
There were many things she expected when she told all of them how her father had officially sold her off to live with Sugimura, how she was going to start living with him on October 11, how things might never be the same and that she might be restricted from going out or meeting them, but it will all be fine, they didn’t need to worry about her.  
  
What she didn’t expect was Morgana’s quiet but insistent prodding on her left arm, where Sugimura grabbed her. She didn’t expect Yusuke’s gentle permission to ice it over (with what, she had wondered) until she had raised her arm for him and he blew, cold breath coming out instead of warm. She didn’t expect to be sat down on Akira’s bed as all of them surrounded her and told her fantastical tales of Shadows, of Personas, and of the world where peoples’ hearts are made manifest.  
  
She didn’t expect to meet the Phantom Thieves.

  
**Phantom Thieves**  
  
**Joker** : How is Haru?  
  
**Queen** : I got her to the train station safely. I asked her if she could contact us when she gets home.  
  
**Joker** : Good call.  
  
**Mona** : Do you think Haru believes us?  
  
**Queen** : I’m hoping she will.  
  
**Joker** : Regardless of whether she believes us or not, we’re going into the Palace tomorrow.  
**Joker** : Haru told us about her father’s ambitions, right?  
  
**Skull** : She said something about how he wants to go beyond being a businessman, yeah?  
  
**Panther** : His keyword has to be about going beyond or something like that.  
**Panther** : Where would we go beyond though?  
  
**Queen** : It can’t be anything lackluster or plain. If Okumura has truly been planning to exceed expectations, it must be somewhere big.  
  
**Skull** : How about a cruise ship?  
  
**Joker** : Nope.  
  
**Fox** : An airplane?  
  
**Joker** : No.  
  
**Panther** : How about a blimp?  
  
**Joker** : As awesome as stealing from a blimp sounds, no dice.  
  
**Queen** : Maybe we should stop thinking about physical objects and start thinking about extreme concepts instead.  
  
**Panther** : Like alternate dimensions?  
  
**Skull** : Dude, the Metaverse is already an alternate dimension. We’re gonna have alternate dimension-ception if his Palace has alternate dimensions!  
  
**Joker** : Luckily for you, it’s not a hit.  
  
**Fox** : I believe we’re thinking too out of the box.  
**Fox** : Might I bring up the fast food chain itself?  
**Fox** : Its motif is outer space, so does it not make sense that his distortion may manifest into something that isn’t tied to Earth?  
  
**Queen** : Outer space is somewhere that is considered extreme, but so is underwater.  
**Queen** : But then again, there is nothing in what Haru told us that he had any interest in marine life or that sort.  
  
**Joker** : So, outer space?  
  
**Skull** : Try it!  
  
**Joker** : It’s a hit, guys.  
  
**Skull** : For real?? Do you think we’re gonna be in a rocket or something?!  
  
**Fox** : How fascinating.  
  
**Panther** : That would be really cool!  
  
**Queen** : Stealing from a space station sounds so… unrealistic.

 **Skull** : Dude, going into an alternate universe is unrealistic but we’re doing it anyway!

 **Joker** : No no, I see where Queen’s coming from.  
**Joker** : You don’t see thieves infiltrating space stations in movies.

 **Skull** : Uh, yeah they do????  
**Skull** : Space pirates???

 **Queen** : Hm, it never occurred to me.

 **Panther** : Oh my god Skull’s finally going to be in his element.

 **Skull** : I don’t have Captain Kidd anymore though?

 **Panther** : Doesn’t matter, you’re still a space pirate.

 **Joker** : I think you mean a space thief.

 **Panther** : Then we’re all space thieves!

 **Oracle** : You’re a space thief! You’re a space thief! EVERYONE ARE SPACE THIEVES!

 **Fox** : Is this another reference I do not understand because that looks and sounds familiar.

 **Oracle** : He’s learning.  
  
**Queen** : Haru just texted that she’s at home now.  
  
**Joker** : Good.  
**Joker** : Alright Phantom Thieves, we’ve got a job to do! Make sure to rest up for tomorrow.  
**Joker** : Once we go in, we’re not stopping.  
**Joker** : We won’t stop until we’re forced to.

 

**September 21, 2016 (Afternoon)**

Oracle glances at Joker’s exasperated face. They’re all standing in front of all large metal door, “Access Denied” scrolling merrily across the screen above it. The door’s littered with leftover scorch marks and frosted patches while Skull kicks it repeatedly, snarling. “What was that about not stopping until we’re forced to?”

Joker curses. “Fuck.”

 

“The Phantom Thieves have begun their infiltration of Okumura’s Palace. They should be finished with it within the next couple of days.”

“And Goro?”

“Already aware. I hope Shido doesn’t mind some… changes to his plans.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't wait to break canon over my knee and shove it into a blender.
> 
> (Yes it moved real quick at the end, but that's just because I didn't find Haru finding out about the PT too important. I'll leave it to your imagination; a lot happens off screen, after all.)


	19. we got some,,,,, space station

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Phantom Thieves grumble about Okumura's Palace, mugs, and a hop, step, jump into the space station. Also, Goro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up y'all I'm back! Sorry for the 2 month delay. School started again and I got into an art high and things just got too busy.
> 
> So several things:  
> \- Some more headcanons (ie Akira takes care of buying their weapons but the Phantom Thieves are the ones who keep and store their old ones LIKE THEY SHOULD.)  
> \- Official approximate final chapter count if you haven't noticed already (this is a wild ride from start to finish be ready.)  
> \- Entire story's been planned out, expect more regular updates.  
> \- Fuck canon.
> 
> Have fun!

**September 21, 2016 (Evening)**

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : Hello hi I’d like to ask whoever makes Palaces  
**super fluffy** : Why the fuck does Okumura have a biometric lock in his Palace  
**super fluffy** : It’s bullshit  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Still in a mood?  
  
**yeet** : its a big ass mood  
**yeet** : i never wanted to analyze the logistics of a palace until now  
  
**super fluffy** : Is Okumura that paranoid to lock his own desires and thought processes behind a door literally no one can access expect his blood kin and himself  
**super fluffy** : Is he really that paranoid  
  
**yeet** : bc that means he trusts no one but himself  
**yeet** : and maybe haru but that might just be bc shes his daughter  
**yeet** : dark palace creators reveal your dark biolock secrets  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : aki and tabas been in a mood since we got home  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : “We”  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sHUT  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hey, I’m not teasing you for cuddling up with your boyfriend  
**strawberry shortcake** : Lord knows if Shiho were here I’d fly to her like a moth to a light  
  
**yeet** : im here too u know  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Futaba you’d rather jump into a pit of lava than be caught between AkiRyu  
  
**yeet** : just sayin  
  
**super fluffy** : We welcome you with open arms Futaba  
**super fluffy** : Join us  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i cant believe we have a ship name  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : tf is this an anime  
  
**yeet** : uuuuuuuh excuse me i have a boyfriend  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : How else are we supposed to call you?  
**strawberry shortcake** : Fuckin  
  
**super fluffy** : Your boyfriend would jump on the chance to examine the inner workings of polyamorous relationships and the experience of having more than one significant other  
**super fluffy** : And then somehow paint that all out because he has the hands of god  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Electric Darkness???  
  
**yeet** : stop proving me wrong i didnt ask for this  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ELECTIFC DSRKNESSHAHA  
  
**super fluffy** : >:3  
**super fluffy** : Ann no not that please  
**super fluffy** : Preserve our dignity  
  
**yeet** : what dignity  
**yeet** : u lost ur dignity once u two got together  
  
**super fluffy** : how dare  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : when will our dignity come back from the war  
  
**yeet** : NEVER CAUSE IT FUCKIN DIED  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : DDDDDDDD:  
  
**super fluffy** : Why are you hurting us like this :((((  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : We can’t take you seriously with that face, Akira  
  
**super fluffy** : :((((((((((((((  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : :<<<<<<<<<  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : What is this about polyamorous relationships?  
  
**super fluffy** : Oh whoa Yusuke you’re late  
**super fluffy** : And offer revoked sorry Yusuke you can join someone else  
  
**yeet** : ur basically my bro  
**yeet** : im not kissing ur mug  
  
**super fluffy** : Rude  
**super fluffy** : Let me tell you I have a gorgeous mug  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : he does  
  
**yeet** : invalid  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : D:  
  
**super fluffy** : Wait a minute  
  
**yeet** : ?  
**yeet** : where u goin  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : What’s he doing?  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : he just ran down the stairs yelling about how he’ll get his mug  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : id be confused too if i didnt already know what hes doin  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : ?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Ah, is it perhaps the gift I’ve given as a late birthday present?  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Gift?  
  
**yeet** : OHMYFUCKINGOD  
  
**super fluffy** : mug.png  
**super fluffy** : Kiss the mug  
  
**yeet** : MOGF  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I see you’re treating my gift with delicacy, Akira.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : It’s,,,,,,  
**strawberry shortcake** : Akira’s face,,,,..  
**strawberry shortcake** : On a mug,,  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : yeah!!!  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : aint he cute  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : You’re so gay  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Do not worry, everyone. I have mugs with everyones’ faces printed as birthday presents.  
**graphic design is my passion** : I believe it’s Ann’s birthday next?  
  
**super fluffy** : It is  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : I’ve taken extra care in including details of Carmen and Hecate, as well as her face.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Uh, is it alright if it doesn’t have my face?  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Why would you want that? Your face is beautiful, Ann.  
  
**shihohoho** : get your face on the mug, ann!  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : !!!! Shiho!  
  
**shihohoho** : and send me the same mug please, yusuke.  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Of course.  
  
**super fluffy** : i have to ask though  
**super fluffy** : You have the same amount of money a fish does on a good day  
**super fluffy** : Where are you getting these mugs from  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Excellent question, Akira.  
**graphic design is my passion** : There is a particular classmate of mine who has a friend whose brother’s girlfriend’s sibling has a step sister who has a mug printing machine. I had asked if I could get these mugs for a birthday gift and once I told her of my predicament, she said she would do it for free because, and I quote, “You look like a walking stick with your clothes hanging off your arms and you need your money.”  
**graphic design is my passion** : I must object to that observation.  
**graphic design is my passion** : My arms are a perfectly healthy muscle mass.  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Well...  
  
**super fluffy** : You’re better than when we first met you that’s for damn sure  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : true  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : still a stick tho  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : That’s quite rude, Ryuji.  
  
**yeet** : yeah that wasnt very cash money of u ryuji  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : stop  
  
**yeet** : never  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Aren’t you supposed to be going home soon, Ryuji?  
**strawberry shortcake** : The last train’s going to arrive soon.  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i know  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : aki won’t let me go home  
  
**super fluffy** : :3  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : Akira, let go of your boyfriend  
  
**super fluffy** : Not until Okumura’s Palace stops being bullshit  
**super fluffy** : Which means never  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : s cool  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ma let me stay over so im good  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** :  chillinonthefloor.png   
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : we’re just watchin some random flick rn  
  
**super fluffy** : It’s bullshit  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : The Palace or the movie?  
  
**super fluffy** : Yes  
  
**graphic design is my passion** : Where did Futaba go? Wasn’t she with you?  
  
**yeet** : im on business bitch  
**yeet** : im checking the bugs ive got planted in the downstairs area to make sure theyre still in tip top shape  
**yeet** : stars know how long that one near the lights has been checked  
**yeet** : i can hear ur horse giggles from downstairs knock it off  
  
**super fluffy** : My horse giggles sound beautiful Futaba  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : make sure u finish early or whatever  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : cant have our nav down for the count tmrw  
  
**yeet** : ok dad  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : dad  
  
**super fluffy** : :3c  
**super fluffy** : Daddy  
  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : SGDJDGAJFVJAKSH  
  
**strawberry shortcake** : You know, we should’ve expected that response

 

 

**Niijima Makoto — > Okumura Haru**

**Niijima Makoto** : Haru? Are you online?  
**Niijima Makoto** : Please respond when you get this then.  
**Niijima Makoto** : Can you meet all of us after school tomorrow? There was a certain... issue we encountered when doing our “job” that we need your assistance with.  
**Niijima Makoto** : You aren’t obligated to come with us. You are allowed to say no.  
**Niijima Makoto** : I understand that what we have revealed to you might have been much of a shocker, so feel free to take your time.  
**Niijima Makoto** : Well, now that I think about it, we don’t have that much time, considering the upcoming deadline.  
  
**Okumura Haru** : hi makoto!  
  
**Niijima Makoto** : Haru!  
  
**Okumura Haru** : i would like to accompany all of you. what time will we meet?  
  
**Niijima Makoto** : Are you sure?  
  
**Okumura Haru** : to be honest, i am still shocked that the phantom thieves have been right under all our noses all this time, but my father’s heart is on the line.  
**Okumura Haru** : if you need me to help you in anyway, you may use me in any way you wish.  
**Okumura Haru** : oops that sounded suggestive. i didn’t mean it like that!  
  
**Niijima Makoto** : Haha, don’t worry, I’m used to slip ups like that.  
**Niijima Makoto** : Well, “slip ups” may be the wrong term. Akira has a tendency to make half of the things he says sound like a euphemism.  
  
**Okumura Haru** : haha, i can tell!  
**Okumura Haru** : do i need to bring anything for tomorrow? i don’t exactly know how you operate.  
  
**Niijima Makoto** : You’ll be at the sidelines most of time so...  
**Niijima Makoto** : Just bring yourself and maybe some bandages.

 **Okumura Haru** : ?

* * *

 **September 22, 2016 (Afternoon)**  
  
“So this... is my father’s heart?” What sky there was became an ever expanding void, stars twinkling above through the triangular glass panes of the space station. Earth hangs high over their head. Electricity hums beneath all of their feet. Apprehensive, Haru spins around slowly, taking it all in. “It’s... beautiful.”  
  
Yusuke—wait no, he goes by Fox here—nods, his arms crossed over chest and a blue gloved hand poised on his chin. “Even the hearts of despicable people have the capability to look beautiful, but it is merely a façade to hide their repugnant true selves.” Other thieves nod around him.  
  
“Are you sure you want to come?” asks Queen, watching her carefully from behind her steel mask. “We _are_ going into your father’s heart. I can’t fathom what a man like him thinks of.” It had surprised Haru, when they all entered into her father’s Palace to find the outfits of her new friends replaced with wicked thief costumes, all with masks hiding their faces. Never did she expect Makoto, the student council president, to look like a woman who just came from a post apocalyptic horror movie.  
  
But that’s neither here nor there. “Had I not wanted to come, I would be asking you to take me back already,” Haru replies, smiling. Her eyes dart around. “This is a bit more fantastical than I expected, but I will get used to it. We don’t have time to lose, after all.” She turns her eyes to Joker, who stands with his hands in his pockets. “Shall we?”  
  
“We shall.” With a flourish and a flip of a coattail, Joker turns on his heel, leading the band of thieves towards the large round elevator.

* * *

“Your leader really knows how to show off.” A Shadow shrieks high enough to make their ears ring. Before it can retaliate, a silver knife sings in the air, cutting it cleanly in half.  
  
“He sure does!” From beside him, a towering ape on top of a cloud rams his staff into a different Shadow. With a command from his greater self, the staff lights up with bolts of electricity. The Shadow howls one last time and dissolves into nothing.  
  
“It’s a speciality of his.” Fire lights up the surrounding air. Heat licks the palms of a tall seductress as her cigar balances precariously on her lips.  
  
“Joker is quite attuned to the way his body works. It’s quite fascinating.”  
  
“Guys, none of you are helping!” Mona yowls, darting from a recently deceased Shadow to the one Skull was contending with. A ways away from the battlefield, Haru, Fox, Queen, and Oracle sit in a line against the wall. A duffel bag, marked with the familiar top hat and flaming mask, is open and brimming with stacks of curry plates and seven thermos of coffee as well as few more knick-knacks. Haru passes Fox one of the Jagarikos he had put in the duffel bag.  
  
“It’s not like you’re asking for us, Mona!” Oracle calls back. Her own hands are full of a Necronomicon enhanced game console she no doubt scammed from a foolish seller online. “Besides, this is the tutorial! You know, show Haru the ropes n’all!”

“Oracle, you shouldn’t be taking a break! You should be analyzing!”

“Don’t worry, don’t worry, I’ve got you covered! These are small fry anyway. They’ve got nothing on—“ And then the Arahabaki groans and Panther, coming in for a good thwack against the torso, starts cursing up a storm, her own torso ripped from being reflected. She staggers back with a grimace. “—Oh, oh shit that’s an Arahabaki, wait shit they reflect both Physical and Gun attacks!” Oracle scrambles up and the console in her hands disappears. In a flash, long tentacles flare out of the UFO Persona descending from the ceiling and wrap around her limbs. Necronomicon boarded, the UFO floats to the battle as her speaker already begins booming encouragement.

Haru hums. The air fills with Oracle’s voice. At one point, she yells at Skull to _dodge that wind I swear to God you cannot keep getting caught up in those_. “Both of you are rather unfazed,” she comments.

“It won’t be the first time someone gets hit with a reflected skill and we all know it won’t be the last,” says Queen. “Panther will be better in no time.” Sure enough, with a little healing from Joker, Panther shoots to her feet, snarling at the Shadow with eyes promising a death by hellfire.

“We might have been worried the first time it happened, but it has happened enough times to each one of us that it no longer means much now,” Fox says. The Jagariko cup sits empty by his tail. “Had it been severe, we would show more worry, but this was a simple test. As such, we will be careful of how we will confront Arahabakis.”

“And you do this with all Shadows?”  
  
“We must, to ensure our survival.” Panther roars and Carmen flings red hot flames at the Arahabaki. It shrieks, heat against metal, before it burns into flecks of ash and Shadow remains. Oracle cheers, congratulating on a job well done.

* * *

“Haru...” The robots—the workers—march forward to their jobs. The head bot bobs and sways as it watches each of its underlings. One underling falls over, sparking. It get picked up immediately after and work continues as usual, as if one of robot didn’t just die on the job.

It’s only for a few minutes can Haru stand to watch it before she stalks away.

* * *

“Is this the lock you’re talking about?”  
  
“It is,” replies Joker when the band of eight stop in front of the biometric lock. Had it not been for the clear windows at both sides of the door as well as the words scrolling above it, it would have looked like any other door. “Since it’s a biometric lock, only people who are related to Okumura can open it.”

“Pain in the ass, that one,” Skull scoffs with crossed arms. “Couldn’t even make a dent in it. Your dad ain’t messin’ around with his security.”

“I would except so. Father always was very paranoid about what other people knew about him.” The Okumura family at large, really. Panther peers up at the door.

“How do you think this is supposed to open?” she asks. Everyone shrugs.

“Maybe just walk up and stand in front of the door?” supplies Queen.

As soon as Haru stops in front of the door, the door whirs to life. A scanner beams down on Haru, its red light sweeping over her and some of the other Phantom Thieves, who scramble away once the light lands on them. The light disappears and the sides of the door light up one circle at a time until it beeps in approval, “Access Granted” now scrolling across the screen. She turns around. “Like that?”

Joker smirks. “Just like that.”

* * *

Haru settles into a sort of rhythm by the fifth group of Shadows. When Joker sneaks up and rips the masks off the robots, she hangs back as everyone else charges forward. Depending on who’s low of energy, they hang back with her as well, watching her back as Oracle slowly replenishes their energy. When a particularly effort consuming battle is done, she zips open the bag and passes over the medical supplies and/or food. It’s what she expects really, but...  
  
“Don’t worry, I’m fine, I’m fine.” Skull rubs the back of head—a nervous tic, Haru notices—while Joker fusses over him, Queen pouring a cap full of coffee for their leader. A particularly sneaky Shadow broke through their circular formation while they were throttling some other Shadows, barreling towards the surprised Haru. Skull, the closest, had moved to protect her, but that moment of distraction earned him a throng of screaming wind and a couple of minutes eating dirt. Thank the stars Joker got overly protective whenever Skull went down.  
  
“Stop moving your arm,” Joker hisses at him, wapping him lightly. “You’re going to agitate your wounds.”  
  
“You’re just gonna heal them though, right?”  
  
“Not if it gets infected. Now hold still.”  
  
Joker hovers both of his hands over Skull’s body. Muttering something under his breath, his hands slowly light up in a soft blue-green light, small particles dancing upwards. Skull lets out a sigh of relief. Guilt churns in Haru’s gut.  
  
_If only I could defend myself. Then Skull didn’t have to get hurt. If only I could help them more._ Other than the fact she was there to provide backup medical attention if needed, Haru knew she was fundamentally useless to them. Not knowing how to fight, to defend herself against the Shadows. _I’m just a thorn in their side,_ she thinks bitterly.

She’s already burdened them with the task of changing her father’s heart. If only she could alleviate that stress...!

_‘You wish to gain power?’_

Haru blinks. Huh?

‘ _Your heart yearns for strength, but you have nary the correct drive nor the amount of courage. Do you still have chains in your heart? How can you grow strong without a will to rebel?’_

A will… to rebel?

“You okay?” Haru blinks and Morgana stands there, a paw against her leg, looking up at her with big worried eyes. She smiles down at him. Years upon years of being the daughter of a famous business man has polished her neutral mask quite well.

“Yes. I’m sorry for being an inconvenience.”

Morgana shakes his head. “It’s not your fault. Sometimes some Shadows we don’t kill end up slipping out. It happens. We’re just...usually more on top of things.” They watch Joker pull Skull up from his sitting position. Their hands linger together, even while Panther checks him over for a second opinion.

“You good?” asks Joker, but it’s not towards Skull. The three thieves watch Haru instead, gauging for a reaction. She gives them the same smile she gave Morgana and says, “I’m fine. I’m sorry for putting through danger, Skull.”

“It happens.” Skull waves his hand around, dismissive. “But you’re okay and that’s all that really matters, yeah?” He glances at the rest of the thieves, who were fixing up their own wounds. “Let’s keep on going. We gotta deal with gettin’ that card anyway.”

Morgana pulls on Haru’s sleeve and in tandem, the group strides briskly towards the elevator leading to, they all assumed, the offices.

“You know, it’s pretty damn funny that Okumura’s execs are long, noodly robots and not some big buff tank,” Oracle comments, “All Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man and all.” And just like that, conversation returns effortlessly. Skull guffaws into his hand and starts laughing so hard Haru’s afraid he’ll pull something.

“Real talk though, if they look like that, they might be either unfit or really damn tall,” Joker muses with his fingers against his chin. “Why does Okumura see them as long noodly robots?”

“Noodles…” Fox is in a thinking position of his own. Oracle reaches up to poke his cheek.

“Oi, no thinking about food while we’re on a mission. Didn’t you just eat before we left?”

“I’m not thinking about food, Oracle. I was wondering what the human body would look like entirely constructed of noodles.” His eyes sparkle behind his mask as he turns to address Joker. “Can we—“

“Fox, I have neither the amount of money nor the amount of room for a life size model of a human made entirely out of noodles.” Actually that’s a lie and Joker knows that, but the noodles might attract rats. He has a hard enough time with the chocolate fountain.

“You know,” Panther butts in, raising a finger. “maybe they’re fit and short, but they can’t fight for shit?”

“Actually,” Haru calls out. They all turn to her. “I believe some of managers are trained in martial arts, at least some of the ones I’ve met. It’s not too much of stretch to think they have other reasons for being so… noodly.”

“Aw man, yes Haru, tell us more!” Oracle exclaims. “Dirt on some Okumura Foods higher ups? Sign me up!”

Well, it was nice for them be inclusive, at least, she muses before going into a tirade about some enthusiastic employees whose life dream was actually working in Okumura Foods.

(She doesn’t understand either.)

 

 

**September 22, 2016 (Evening)**

  
**Phantom Thieves**

 **Joker** : So recap.  
**Joker** : First of all, not all of the execs were long noodly robots because goddamn that green one.  
**Joker** : Second of all, we got through the barracks.

 **Skull** : Fuck that place.

 **Panther** : Mood.

 **Queen** : Guys.

 **Joker** : No, no, let them vent. You have to admit, it was pure torture to get through.

 **Skull** : The next time I see that goddamn elephant I’m gonna tear its nose off.  
**Skull** : Fuck, if that thing didn’t have so much endurance, I’d fight it myself!  
**Skull** : Piece of fuckin garbage.

 **Panther** : I’m going to light that goddamn thing on fire.  
**Panther** : The Arahabakis too.

 **Fox** : The barracks droned on for such a long time.  
**Fox** : I was starting to get bored.

 **Oracle** : Fox? Not finding inspiration. in a random thing? Who are you and what did you do to Inari?!

 **Fox** : I am loathe to admit it, but the barracks got monotonous.

 **Queen** : We got out safely with the chief director’s card. That’s all that matters.

 **Mona** : Haru looked like she was having fun too.  
**Mona** : There were way too many close calls today though. Have you all gone soft?

 **Skull** : Hey, it’s really freaking hard fighting while keeping track of Haru, especially when she’s deliverin’ the medicine!  
**Skull** : What if some rando comes in and takes her away?  
**Skull** : Not to mention the elephant’s Deathbounds! She’d be dead if no one shields her!

 **Queen** : True. Honestly, it’s harder to keep track of a normal person than I thought.  
**Queen** : You all seemed fine when you took me to the bank.

 **Panther** : We were welcomed though. And we only had to run for like, 5 seconds until you awakened so there wasn’t much to worry about.  
**Panther** : But for Haru…

 **Joker** : She’ll be along for the whole ride. We can barely make it 10 rooms before we’re stopped by the biometric lock.  
**Joker** : Not to mention the very real possibility of there being more biolocks.

 **Queen** : And with that consideration, we can’t just leave her in a safe room.

 **Panther** : That’s rude!

 **Queen** : That too.

 **Fox** : We must rectify our lack of foresight. If we don’t, we might put Haru in more danger than she is already in.

 **Mona** : Being a Phantom Thief is a pretty dangerous job, huh.

 **Joker** : We signed up for it, so we can’t exactly complain.

 **Queen** : We could get her a weapon. You know, so she can defend herself.  
**Queen** : She doesn’t even have to know how to use it, she just needs to swing it.  
**Queen** : Or look intimidating at least.

 **Joker** : Why didn’t we think about that before?

 **Panther** : Probably because we wanted to kick Okumura so hard in the nuts that we forgot Haru is defenseless?

 **Joker** : You know what, you’re probably right.

 **Panther** : I have some of my spare whips, but I don’t know if she can use it.  
**Panther** : It took me awhile getting used to my own anyway.

 **Skull** : My clubs might be too heavy.

 **Queen** : I don’t know, Haru is surprisingly strong.

 **Skull** : For real?

 **Queen** : You don’t know? Whenever she’s not at home or in class, she tends to a small garden on the school’s roof.  
**Queen** : I’ve seen her carry large bags of soil around, it’s surprising how strong she is.

 **Oracle** : Of course you would know that.

 **Queen** : Oracle.

 **Oracle** : Hehehe.  
**Oracle** : Anyway, if we should get Haru a weapon, she should have a knife or a sword. Clubs probably aren’t her style.

 **Queen** : Bold of you to assume she has a refined style.

 **Oracle** : Huh?

 **Fox** : I do have some of my old swords. They must be polished, however.

 **Joker** : Same with my knives. Let’s ask her tomorrow. If she doesn’t want anything we have, I’ll get there something she wants.  
**Joker** : Speaking of which, we’re heading into Mementos tomorrow instead of the Palace.  
**Joker** : Requests are piling up and Yuuki has been quietly reminding me about them.

 **Panther** : Didn’t he pass by your desk and give you a piece of paper with just a frown face on it today?

 **Joker** : Yes he did.

 **Skull** : But your desk is next to the window. Isn’t his near the door?  
  
**Joker** : Yes it is.

 

 

**September 22, 2016 (Late Evening)**

_Not a soul inside._ The office is empty, but cluttered with papers scattered all over the floor. Goro’s eyes dart around quickly from behind the door before he slowly pushes it open. Darkness sits at every corner of the room except for the desk, where a weak desk lamp illuminates a couple of piles of papers. Mindful of the potential mess he could make, Goro inhales deeply as he pulls a glove off of his hand. He faces his palm outward towards the room and slowly, his hand begins to shine.

Light encompasses his entire hand and some of his forearm, muted just enough for his eyes to not hurt. Keeping his arm out, Goro slowly makes his way towards the desk. His eyes dart to the camera in the corner of the room. _The technicians are still doing maintenance. I only have a few minutes._ As soon as he reaches the desk, the light on his hand fades and he pulls his glove back on. The papers on the desk are arranged in haphazard piles. Packets stick out of folders and folders marked with long numbers too long for him to memorize are stacked out of order. Wine red eyes scan over the folders. 

Shadow research...

Plumes of Dusk...

Persona...

Ah, that’s new. Carefully, Goro picks up a folder a few days old, stamped with a “SENSITIVE INFORMATION” and a “HEAD SCIENTIST ONLY” on the front.

He opens it.

Semantics greet his eyes, swaths of information about the recent developments of one of their longest running projects. His eyes narrow.

“Not this one.” He puts the folder down, slipping it back into where it once came. They don’t need to know about that one. Not yet.

His phone begins vibrating and Goro lets out a quiet curse. He pulls a folder, an older one dating a few months, from the vast pile, opens his briefcase, and slams it inside. Locking it shut, he hastily tip toes towards the door. Now with his glove covering his hand, the light coming from there isn’t as bright, but he manages, barely stumbling out the door. He doesn’t need to worry about the head scientist missing one of her folders. She always has at least eight copies on her, what’s one that she can’t find?

The door closes with a quiet click. Sighing deeply, Goro pulls out his phone. Just in time. The cameras inside should be active now. Dusting himself, Goro breathes deeply, once, twice, then stalks out of the hallway. Now then, there was a folder to deliver to Mitsuru-san.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... I did say fuck canon at the beginning, didn't I?
> 
> Now listen here, Haru didn't awaken after the biolock opened because I personally don't understand why Okumura showed up at the biolock of all places. Why would he, high and mighty as he is, randomly appear there when he doesn't even care for his employees? He sure as hell wasn't walking around, checking on his employees, so why? Answer: plot.
> 
> Stay tuned for the next chapter! If you wanna keep tabs on when I update, I notify my [Discord](https://discord.gg/cEyYmFA) when a chapter's up! We don't really talk much there, but it's a fine little place.


	20. Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It starts off sweet, but then...
> 
> A princess falls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Content warning: Disturbing imagery)

**September 23, 2016 (Morning)**

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

_super fluffy has added Okumura Haru to the chat!_

_Okumura Haru changed their name to ultra fluffy!_

**super fluffy** : Welcome to our newest member

**ultra fluffy** : oh!  
**ultra fluffy** : hello!

**strawberry shortcake** : There she is!

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sup haru!

**fists on wheels** : Welcome, Haru!

**graphic design is my passion** : Hello, Haru.

**Morganya** : hi!

**yeet** : yote

**ultra fluffy** : i was going to ask who everyone was, but i suppose i don’t need to!  
**ultra fluffy** : there are some names i don’t recognize though…

**super fluffy** : Don’t worry they’re just some other people who know about us  
**super fluffy** : Some friends and two of my fake parents

**ultra fluffy** : fake parents?  
**ultra fluffy** : there are such things?

**super fluffy** : Not really they’re just a bunch of adults I had grown up with when I was younger  
**super fluffy** : They’ll pop up eventually they always do  
**super fluffy** : Maybe not Minato-senpai at this time of day

**ultra fluffy** : i’m sure it will be wonderful to meet them!

**super fluffy** : Oh I’m sure  
**super fluffy** : They love meeting friends  
**super fluffy** : Real quick tho is the nickname fine

**ultra fluffy** : it’s splendid! very fitting.

**super fluffy** : I aim to please

**strawberry shortcake** : Ultra fluffy why?

**super fluffy** : You know  
**super fluffy** : Haru’s hair is fluffier than my future

**Morganya** : That still makes no sense!

**super fluffy** : And I will still say you make no sense

**ultra fluffy** : please don’t say that akira! my hair may be fluffier than yours, but i can say for certain that your future is very bright! it would be an insult to say otherwise!

**super fluffy** : …

**fists on wheels** : Akira’s usually joking, but I think this is the first time someone responded with a complement.

**super fluffy** : Haru,,,,,

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : did he start fuckin cryin???

**Morganya** : you know it.

**super fluffy** : HAAAAARRUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
**super fluffy** : YOU’RE SO WONDERFUL

**ultra fluffy** : so are you! <3 <3

**super fluffy** : AAAAAAAAAA  
**super fluffy** : God if I weren't so gay I would date you so hard

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : babe!!  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : what about us?!  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i mean i dont blame u but what about us??

**super fluffy** : I’LL DATE YOU AND HER AT THE SAME TIME IT’S A WIN WIN

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : OKAY YES THATS FINE

**yeet** : i live for the fact that these two idiots r always ready to have a threesome

**ultra fluffy** : aww thank you for the offer!  
**ultra fluffy** : i have my eyes on another however, but i appreciate the sentiment.

**super fluffy** : Σ(ﾟロﾟ)

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : who?!

**ultra fluffy** : boys, boys.  
**ultra fluffy** : you know i don’t have to tell~

**super fluffy** : Of course you can do whatever you want!

**ultra fluffy** : just kidding~  
**ultra fluffy** : mako-chan, are you free Sunday?

**super fluffy** :  Σ(ﾟ口ﾟ;)//

**strawberry shortcake** : OH SHIT

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : HOLY FUCK

**graphic design is my passion** : Oh my.

**yeet** : so bold…

**Morganya** : well that escalated quickly.

**strawberry shortcake** : MAKOTO SAY SOMETHING  
**strawberry shortcake** : MAKOTO  
**strawberry shortcake** : @fists on wheels  
**strawberry shortcake** : @fists on wheels  
**strawberry shortcake** : @fists on wheels

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : @fists on wheels MAKOTO

**fists on wheels** : I didn’t expect an offer for a date to be one of the first thing to see on a Friday.

**super fluffy** :  You’re freaking the fuck out right now aren’t you

**fists on wheels** : God, you didn’t have to say it!

**ultra fluffy** : if you aren’t free, you don’t have to! we can go out another time!

**strawberry shortcake** : I love how Haru’s 100% confident you want to date her

**ultra fluffy** : honestly, it wasn’t that hard to notice how differently mako-chan treats me compared to the rest of you.  
**ultra fluffy** : but i must say that i have been paying attention to her as well.  
**ultra fluffy** : while i have never pursued a relationship with someone, it won't hurt to try and experience it with someone who has worked her way into my heart.  
**ultra fluffy** : :) <3

**yeet** : GUYS WE HAVE A PROBLEM  
**yeet** : HARU’S TOO STRONG  
**yeet** : SHE’S GONNA TAKE US DOWN WITH HER WORDS ALONE  
**yeet** : WE’RE SCREWED

**super fluffy** : So much guts…

**ultra fluffy** : you misunderstand, my heart is pounding right now!  
**ultra fluffy** : what is your answer, mako-chan?

**strawberry shortcake** : SAY YES

**super fluffy** : SAY YES

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i dont wanna push u do smth since its ur love life buT PLEASE SAY YES MAKO

**fists on wheels** : Are we going anywhere on Sunday, Akira?

**super fluffy** : We shouldn’t be.

**fists on wheels** : Then I should be free for the entire day.

**ultra fluffy** : splendid!

**strawberry shortcake** : YES  
**strawberry shortcake** : YEEESSSSSSSSSSS

**super fluffy** : Just gonna write down in the book…

**graphic design is my passion** : Congratulations, Haru, Makoto.

**yeet** : get some

**Sets** : Congratulations.

**super fluffy** : sOUJI-SENPAI WHERE DID YOU COME FROM

**Sets** : I’m a little bit confused, but from my understanding, you got a new party member?

**super fluffy** : Yes!!! ultra fluffy’s Okumura Haru  
**super fluffy** : Oh fcuk

**Morganya** : i think akira knocked something over, hold on.

**ultra fluffy** : are you one of akira-kun’s fake parents?

**Sets** : Indeed I am.  
**Sets** : Minato’s not up yet. He usually wake up at around 10, so it’s just me right now.  
**Sets** : Seta Souji, a pleasure.  
Sets: You may have seen me. I was one of Mitsuru-san's bodygauards during your meeting.

**ultra fluffy:**  the grey haired one, right?  
**ultra fluffy:**  i do remember you! **  
ultra fluffy** : pardon, but your last name is seta? as in the seta corporation?

**Sets** : The very same.

**ultra fluffy** : you must be the heir.

**Sets** : Former heir.

**ultra fluffy** : oh, my apologies!

**ultra fluffy** : i’ve heard some… unsightly things about you.

**Sets** : As expected. My parents didn’t exactly take it well when I said I didn’t want to inherit the company, but that’s neither here nor there.

**Sets** : It’s a pleasure to meet you, Haru-chan.

**ultra fluffy** : a pleasure.  
**ultra fluffy** : you know about personas as well?

**Sets** : Yes.  
**Sets** : Unfortunately, I don’t think over text is the best way to explain it. Face to face would be better, but it’s really up to the rest of the Phantom Thieves to decide when to tell you. You’re part of their group, after all.  
**Sets** : Speaking of which, any reason for their radio silence?

**Morganya** : i kinda yelled at them in the pt chat to get ready for school so they won’t be late  
**Morganya** : they're all running around right now  
**Morganya** : except for futaba, stars know what she does in her off time

**Sets** : You’re really are wonderful at rounding up the Phantom Thieves.

**Morganya** : hey, i’m not the one who needs an education.

**ultra fluffy** : does this usually happen?

**Morganya** : them getting over enthusiastic about something on the group chat? yes.

**super fluffy** : Shut up you goddamn cat

**Morganya** : make me.

**Sets** : And he returns.

**super fluffy** : Fyi, we're not going into the Palace today  
**super fluffy** : We've got some business to cover in another part of the Metaverse

**ultra fluffy** : okay! just notify me when you’re going in!

**super fluffy** : of course.

* * *

**September 23, 2016 (Afternoon)**

The Phantom Thieves left as soon as school ended.

Makoto had been in a rush to meet with the rest of the thieves that she wasn’t able to talk to her about the conversation earlier, but Haru knew how busy she was, so she didn’t pester her.

Haru would never admit it out loud, but she was kind of bummed they weren’t going to the Palace today.

She didn’t know if it was the urgency to change her father’s heart or the thrill of watching the Phantom Thieves in their element, but being in the Metaverse gave her such a… such a… a high.

_Well that sounds wrong_ , she muses. Shaking her head, Haru makes her way across the street towards the front of the headquarters. Headquarters/home, really. People bustle around, some businessmen and women, walking out of the building for completing their work day. Others linger in the front. There was a group of tourists being introduced the building by a tour guide. Some packs of teenagers ambled by, giggling at some of the people snapping pictures. Runners run by Haru as she walks down the crosswalk. All in all, it was just the normal crowd.

Haru sighs and shakes her head. She shouldn’t be thinking about the Phantom Thieves right now. She was going to meet her with father about something and she already kind of knew what it was going to be about.

_Sugimura might’ve complained about the meeting in Hawaii_. The man thought the meeting had been a disaster, which it was, for him. While he got humiliated by Mitsuru and a cat—Morgana must have been yelling at him, Haru realizes—, Haru got to enjoy her new friend’s birthday.

Though it’s not like her father to really care about her feelings about a matter.

Her phone dings.

 

**Niijima Makoto → Okumura Haru**

**Niijima Makoto** : So about that date…

 

Haru giggles into her hand.

 

**Okumura Haru** : aren’t you supposed to be "working”?

**Niijima Makoto** : Akira has me sitting out of a little bit and have the others do some work. We're closing in on our target.

**Okumura Haru** : well, there’s a wonderful cafe i know in the heart of the city. or would rather somewhere more scenic? i’m sure i could get a car to drive us somewhere.

**Niijima Makoto** : Oh wow, I should’ve realized you had a bunch of places already.  
**Niijima Makoto** : I admit, I’ve a little bit of a novice at this.

**Okumura Haru** : didn’t i tell you? i am as well! we shall have our first experiences together!

**Niijima Makoto** : ...Was that a euphemism?

**Okumura Haru** : what if it was? ;)

**Niijima Makoto** : ...I knew hanging out with Akira for too long was going to be a bad idea.

 

A notification pops up from the top of her phone and she looks up. While she was texting, the street cleared. The way towards the building seems to drain out of people, leaving her to be the only one walking the way. Haru glances back down to her phone, 15:05 blinking back at her. _It’s only 3:05, I still have time to do things before I have to meet with Father. Now, where should Mako-chan and I—_

“Sorry about this, Okumura-san.”

Something—some _one_ —pushes against Haru’s back and she yelps, staggering forward. Whoever that was hit her hard, not hard enough for it to bruise, but enough to make her stomach churn. Purposefully? Most likely.

Her normally composed temper spikes into annoyed as she whirls around to address the person who bumped into her—

—But there’s no more street. No roaring cars, no chattering people. The sky is dark. There is only the gentle hum of electricity under her feet and the wide expanse of stars above the large triangle paned dome. Haru’s eyes widen in realization. _It can’t be_. She's in her father’s palace.

“<Found: Lady Haru>”

“<Lady Haru>”

“<Lady Haru Has Been Located>”

And she was surrounded by robots.

Haru barely suppresses the terrified squeak as some ten, fifteen robots chatter and clank around the elevator. There were some blue workers, some of the golden ones the Phantom Thieves often fought, and some of the tall and thin robots. They all clattered around, but all their heads were trained on her.

Haru bullies herself to stay calm. She takes a deep breath, two deep breaths, and weighs her options. Was there was way out of this? Not likely. Whoever pushed her must have known she was going into the Metaverse. A Persona user? She had thought those were few and far inbetween. Then again, she doesn’t know much to begin with.

Curse the fact that she wasn’t as experienced as the Phantom Thieves. They would know how to get out of this. She doesn’t have any weapons. The only thing on her is her school bag. There were several very pointy pencils in her pencil case, but they probably wouldn’t do anything to metal clad robots. The ruler she has is also probably going to be useless, but it’s metal, if that counts. If she can’t break through through brute force…

Haru narrows her eyes and she straightens up, dusting herself off. She’ll have to go along with a ruse.

“Hello,” she starts carefully, looking around the robots. “I heard you were looking for me?”

One of the tall red ones slinks forward. “<Lady Haru Located>” it beeps. “<Biometric Lock Has Been Unlocked T - 26 Hours><Logical Explanation: Lady Haru Has Escaped><Task: Return Lady Haru To Her Room>”

Without warning, the robots fan out and surround her, the round, golden robots moving to flank her while the blue workers take up the rear. The three red chiefs take up the front. “<Initiate Task: Return Lady Haru To Her Room><For Lord Okumura!>”

“<For Lord Okumura!>” chant the other bots. They march in unison slowly. Haru has no choice to follow.

She bites her lip. How smart were these robots? Could she possibly…?

Haru takes out her phone from her pocket. It’s still perfectly functional, with a full signal. The robots continue forwards, not aware at all.

Venting harshly through her nose, she unlocks her phone as fast as she can and goes to the chat app. Calling was too risky. Texting was the only way. She texts Makoto again. Several time, shes spams here with the same message of “hello?” but she doesn’t answer. Akira must have put her back into battle. Then there was only one other way the contact the Phantom Thieves.

* * *

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**ultra fluffy** : hello?

**yeet** : hey haru whats up  
**yeet** : we’re kinda in the metaverse rn so the others arent gonna be answering  
**yeet** : but im here so whats good

**ultra fluffy** : i don’t know how much time i have, but someone pushed me into my father’s palace and now i’m surrounded by robots. they’re taking me somewhere, i don’t know where, but i believe i need to be saved.  
**ultra fluffy** : help?

 

In Mementos, high above the Phantom Thieves as they take on one of their requests—Togo Hifumi’s ass mother—Oracle spits out her drink.

“What the fuck?!” she yells. “Necronomicon, tracker number 0304! Now!” The very air in front of Oracle glows in electric green and a screen pops up with a quiet beep. She had put a tracking device on Haru’s phone just to be safe, in case Sugimura decided to show his ugly mug and try to drag her somewhere, but she didn’t expect to use it so soon.

The on screen map blips to life with a map of the Metaverse. Mementos, portrayed as a massive red-black blob, blinks Alibaba’s symbol. A little off to the side, in a more solid, square structure, sits the red dot of Haru’s tracker. Okumura’s Palace.

“Shit!” Oracle swerves around and lunges towards the UFO’s controls. She slams her hand on a big red button. The speakers whirs.

“Guys!” Her voice comes through the speakers by Necronomicon’s gargoyle. Fox glances at it for a second before being pushed out of the way of an Agidyne. The Lilium giggles, fluttering its wings. “You’re gonna have to deal with this skank as soon as possible!”

“Why?! We just started!” Skull calls back. The Lilum points her finger at him and the air around him sparkles and crackles, charging the air around him. He takes the Ziodyne it in like nothing. “We’ve got time, don’t we?” Angered, the demon hisses and swats the air. Gales rip towards Skull, but before they can hit, Mona jumps into to take the blow. “Thanks Mona!”

“Thank me with sushi!” he replies and jumps back in to slash at the demon. Skull groans.

“You know I can’t afford that!”

“Shut up guys, this is serious!” Oracle leans and hits two of the holographic screens in front of her. “Full buff along with some Ultra Charge!” Swirls from bright rainbow, pink, and blue race into each of the Phantom Thieves.

“Listen up, idiots, this is a code red, code red I say! We’ve got our guest party member trapped in Okumura Senior’s Palace, taken hostage by some of Okumura’s cronies!” Okay, maybe she should’ve buffed them after telling them that. Their power levels just skyrocketed, holy cow. The Lilum clearly doesn’t know how to read a room because she laughs and decides to charge up another magic spell.

Wait a minute. Them getting angry does fuel their emotions, which also fuels their magical output. Not only magical output, but with the heart pounding in nervousness, it might also trigger a rush of adrenaline. That would also mean an increase of physical power… Lilum blasts them with a powered Zionga, the electricity raining from the heavens. All of them dodge it save for Skull, who grins maliciously at the demon. Oracle checks their levels.  Power level exponentially increasing. Attack, Defense, and Evasion stats have exceeded their highest parameters. Specialized Affinity abilities’ cooldown time decreasing. Excellent.

Now to increase that output even more… They did need to finish this as soon as possible… Oracle clears her throat.

“She’s defenseless probably, since she’s following his workers or she fought back and now she’s actually been taken hostage.”

Something snaps in the air. Smoke starts billowing out of Panther’s mouth. Skull’s arms run wild with electricity as Mona’s neckerchief starts floating on its own. The very ground underneath Queen’s feet starts melting. Fox’s breath condenses every times he breathes and the shadows at Joker’s feet start quivering and forming into shapes, reaching out the Lilum that was about to get fucking wrecked.

Oracle smirks. One shouldn’t underestimate the Phantom Thieves when they’re buffed, worried, and angry as shit.

Joker smirks. “We’ll be done in three.”

* * *

As soon as they pass through the biometric lock, Haru knows her rescue’s going to come a little later than planned. There’s no way to leave something there to leave it open, the robots in the back will just gather it up and give it back to her. There was also no way they were going to listen to her. Despite being “the esteemed daughter of Lord Okumura”, none of the robots listened to her demands. What did this mean for her self in this world?

“<The Outside World Is Dangerous>”, says one of the tall red robots when she asked it why she wasn’t allowed outside. “<Petty Thieves Run Loose And Might Steal Away Lady Haru><Lord Okumura Does Not Want Lady Haru To See The Thieves So That She Remains Pure For Selling>”

That last sentence sends chills down Haru’s spine. Selling? What happened to her cognitive self?

They go past the room the Thieves has already unlocked and into a different hall. One hall leads to the the outside, Haru can tell, but the hall they’re going down leads to a series of rooms. All of them are unmarked, blank silver doors except for the one at the very end.

“<Destination Reached>” buzzes a red chief. The robots part, waiting for Haru to walk forward, but she’s shocked, too horrified to move.

Chains. All along the door, large silver chains crisscross the door, nearly covering the door itself in sleek silver. Five different colored and sized locks hang on the chains. A security device sits on the wall with numbers 0-9 on the keypad as well as a handprint scanner under it. There’s a optical scanner, a simple sliding lock, a pin tumbler lock… how many locks did this one door have?!

One of the red chiefs reaches over and taps each of the locks with a long finger. With loud clicks, each of them come loose, open with a snap, or beep in affirmative. With each lock disengaged, the door opens.

“<Return Lady Haru To Her Room>” says the rear robots before suddenly, they shove Haru towards the room, heavy and hard.

“No!” she cries out, turning around to try to claw her way out from the robots but then thin arms curl around her torso and pull her towards the door. Her feet lose traction on the floor and her fingers can’t find any hard groove in the robots to take hold of and pull. Her grip keeps slipping, the arms keep pulling, her heart keeps dropping further and further into her stomach before the arms yank at her so hard that her breath rushes out of her.

They cross the threshold of the door and the first thing Haru sees is white. The walls are a bare white, not a lick of color anywhere. The floors are metal, but painted in white as well, the same color as the walls. Haru coughs as red chief stops and lowers her to the ground.

“<Task Completed>” It warbles. The robots march out of the room one by one, not even looking back at Haru. She struggles to stand to reach the door before it closes, but she takes too long. The door closes shut with a loud bang.

“Wait! Please!” Haru lunges towards the door, nearly stumbling on her feet. There’s no door knob, no handle. This door was clearly meant to be one that could be opened on the outside, but couldn’t be opened from the inside. Now she was actually trapped. Those locks, the robots might have re locked them. She can’t fight her way out, she can’t do anything.

A desperate sound escapes her throat. Panicked, she reaches for her phone.

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**ultra fluffy** : they’ve taken me to a room of some sort.  
**ultra fluffy** : i don’t know where i am or how long they’re planning to keep me here.  
**ultra fluffy** : it was locked back with at least ten different locks i know i can’t get out on my own.  
**ultra fluffy** : i’m kind of panicking?!

**super fluffy** : We’re on our way.  
**super fluffy** : Are you sure wherever you are is completely sealed? Look for as many exits as you can, and if Okumura decides to pay you a visit, stall.

 

She might have to face her father? Alone?

 

**super fluffy** : I’m really sorry to ask you of this, but I need you to be brave for us, okay?  
**super fluffy** : Queen’s a bit preoccupied right now; she’s driving us out of another part of the Metaverse so we can get to your dad’s Palace.  
**super fluffy** : You watched us in the Metaverse, I know you can handle yourself.  
**super fluffy** : We’ll get you out of there, I promise.  
**super fluffy** : Stay calm, alright?

**ultra fluffy** : i’ll do my best.

 

_Stay calm_. Stay calm. She can do that. Haru works to get her breathing under control. Okay, she _wasn’t_ trapped in a room. She _wasn’t_ alone in the Metaverse. She could do this. She just had to believe in the Phantom Thieves.

First things first, time to find exits. Haru jumps towards the door. She knows it won’t open. Even still, she feels along the door, desperate to find something.

Creaking.

Haru feels along the grooves of the door. No air, no nothing.

Rattling.

She knocks once, knocks twice. This was cold, hard metal. Nothing she had on her could even make a dent in this.

A breath.

Haru freezes. _Wait, if I was brought to ‘my’ room, then…_ Slowly, she turns around.

At the back of the room is a bed. King sized, with red plush covers and pillows. It looks distinctly out of place in a space station, but she was barely paying attention to that. On the bed is a doll. It is humanoid, not like the robots in the station, as large as a normal human would be. In fact, it’s the most human thing Haru had seen here. It’s dressed in a long white bride’s dress, modern, not traditional. Long golden chains wrap around each of the doll’s limbs, snaking down into the floor. The chains are digging in, indenting the doll’s arms and legs enough for small trickles of liquid to seep out from underneath the chains.

The doll has buttons for eyes and a mouth sewn shut. Its hair, made of peach colored cotton balls, is fluffed around its ears. The chest part of the dress has been burned by a brand. It reads: “Belongs to Sugimura—” the rest of the name is scratched out.

Haru collapses on the floor, eyes still on the doll, tearing spilling over on her cheeks.

Cognitive Haru tilts her head, creaking audibly. From her throat, her voice flooded with awful static, she speaks.

“<He-e-e-e-llo?>”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things can go downhill awfully quickly, can they?


	21. Rise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The band of thieves rush to save the fallen princess.
> 
> The princess meets her counterpart.
> 
> An empress rises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready, y'all, this one's a doozy. I had a ton of fun writing this! Beta'd by the lovely @musical_life!
> 
> Removed warnings, someone tell me if I need to add them.
> 
> Also added the graphic depictions of violence tag. It kinda needs it now to prepare for later.

**September 23, 2016**

All is quiet in Okumura Kunikazu’s Palace.

Robots stand stiffly in front of the large circular elevator that leads to the outside of the Palace. They are quiet, ready to attack at the first notice of anything amiss. The elevator itself has disappeared from its usual place on the floor. Its quiet hum can be faintly heard, but it grows louder by the second. With each passing second, the robots wait, ready to descend on the intruders.

They are scum, says Lord Okumura. They are to be annihilated, says Lord Okumura. They are hindrances to achieving Utopia, says Lord Okumura.

They must die, says Lord Okumura.

The elevator lands on the floor with a quiet thump.

The robots raise their arms, screaming to the heavens in the name of their lord—

Until they taste the metal of Morgana’s hood ramming into them and crushing, as well as screeching, through the throng of bots on screaming wheels.

The skylight of the Monabus slams open and Skull rockets out of it, a hand on his already flaming blue mask. With a shout, Seiten Taisei materializes in a roar of flame and electricity, staff swinging and lightning booming from the ceiling. The right side of the car opens with Queen, body flaming cerulean, shooting out of the car, Anat in motorcycle form already speeding next to the bus. She barely has any time to slam her hand on her mask and scream a nuclear spell that leaves all the robots near into puddles of radioactive goo.

“Setting up comm links,” says Oracle, in the backseat, her fingers flying across a holographic console. “Gimme a sec…” She hits her console one more time before grinning. “And done!”

“Queen, Skull, you good?” Joker hollers from the driver’s seat. Beside him, Panther has half of her body leaning out of the window while she rains bullets on rapidly approaching robots. Oracle mummers something indecipherable, analyzing.

“Affirmative, Joker!”

“A-okay, leader!” Half of Fox’s body sticks out of the right window, eyes glowing light blue; his mask flaming as he breathes ice onto any incoming walkers and Kamu Susano-o freezing any of the airborne robots Skull missed.

“That first wave of bots did a number on Mona’s hood, but he’s a strong cat-car so he’ll be fine,” Oracle reports, eliciting a grunt from Mona. “We’ve got Queen covering the right side of the car, Fox and Panther covering the left, and Fox and Skull covering the top.”

Joker barely turns his head to glance at Fox from his periphery. “Are you sure you can handle the strain, Fox?”

Fox scoffs, condensed air blowing out. “I will be fine. If in the event Haru’s life is in danger, I know it is not a battle I will fight. I will do my part in Haru’s rescue.”

“I’ve got an eye on everyone’s vitals anyway,” Oracle comments as Fox turns back just in time to shoot ice breath at a teetering robot. “I’ll make sure you’re all good to go!”

Mona meows loudly as Joker makes him turns a corner, tires screeching when another wave of bots descend on them from around the corner. The long robots screech and shrill, their wires and circuits frying into ashes from Seiten Taisei’s lightning. Ryuji whoops from next to his Persona’s feet.

“Take that, you piece of shit!”

“Skull, don’t use too much of your energy!” Joker orders swiftly.

“Roger that, Joker!”

“Panther, as soon as you run out of bullets, swap out your gun for Hecate. I think she’ll be able to trip up a good amount of robots.”

“Got it!”

“Fox, is Kamu Susano-o watching the rear?”

“He is.”

“Excellent. Oracle, status?”

“There’s more hordes waiting for us behind the doors, but they’ll be a piece of cake. We’ve got some distance to the biolock, but it’s only a stone’s throw away from where Haru is!” The navigator squints at her screen, pulling a window up from nowhere. In the front seat, Panther throws her gun into the car with a scowl before she raised a hand to her mask, already burning bright.

The hissing of Hecate’s chained pets joins Anat’s engine. “And I’ve already hacked into the system as much as I could so all the automatic doors should open immediately.” Joker swerves into another hallway, blocked by a door. It opens up almost immediately. Oracle cackles.

Joker’s hands tighten around the wheel. “Alright everyone, hang on tight!”

* * *

 “Oh my god.” _Oh my god._ Haru wants to vomit. Her stomach threatens to empty itself, churning violently the more she stares at this… at this… horrible version of herself. Was this how her father saw her? As as a doll, chained down to her father’s Palace, dressed for marriage? Cognitive Haru makes a noise.

“<Go-d-d-d-d-d?>” she rasps. “<I apo-o-o-o-ologize. I do not know wha-a-a-at a god i-i-i-i-is. I kn-n-n-n-now only what Father has ta-a-a-aught me.>” Every time her voice elongates a syllable, it rattles with static and her head twitches in little spasms. Her head shifts, dark brown buttons staring at Haru’s horrified face. “<A-a-a-a-are you alri-i-ght?>”

Haru wants to scream, to shout in mortification, but the words sit trapped in her throat, her mind whirling violently. Shock overwrites all of her thoughts. Cognitive Haru’s face twists and her mouth scrunches up in a frown, stitches stretching and bunching together while her sewn on eyebrows pinch together.

“<You do n-n-n-n-not look fine.>” And suddenly the cognitive copy shifts her weight. With buttons still on the shocked real counterpart, Cognitive Haru huffs and pushes herself towards the side of the bed. The chains around her arms and legs clank noisily in protest, but they elongate as she moves.

She’s slow in her movement, as if she wasn’t used to moving so much, but once the cognition stands and starts limbering towards Haru with the accompanying song of rattling chains, Haru’s brain kicks into overdrive.

“Stop!” she screams, raw and guttural and her arm shoots up, palm out. Cognitive Haru stops.

Her heart feels like it’s about to jump out of her rib cage and her palms are starting to sweat. The fear that settled in her stomach continues to churn it, but Haru can’t lose her cool now. Quickly, she swipes a hand over her eyes, getting rid of any of the tears that had gathered. Belatedly, she realizes her phone is vibrating.

She knows Akira or even the rest of the Phantom Thieves will clamour to know what’s happening with her, but Haru couldn’t keep her eyes off the doll any longer than necessary. She didn’t know what she’ll do, how much range of motion she had with her chains. Were they longer than they looked? Could she attack?

Cognitive Haru tilts her head. Black stitches are visible on her bare neck. “<I do n-n-n-n-not mean any ha-a-arm,>” she says as she raises her arms in a placating gesture. “<I would onl-l-l-l-l-ly like to see i-if you are alright-t-t-t.>”

How much of that is a lie? Were cognitive beings capable of lying outright? Haru’s eyes narrow. If she were her father, how would he see her?

If she were her father… Haru’s eyes widen as she comes to a realization.  If this was how she was perceived in this world, then she wouldn’t _know_ how to fight.

Shakily, Haru lowers her hand. Taking that as an initiative, Cognitive Haru begins to amble her way towards her once more.

She takes one step, then another, before the chains clang with a sharp _ting!_ and she stumbles, falling to the ground. The chains embedded her legs are taut to their fullest length. Her legs and arms meet the ground hard. Her whimpers are laced with static, but it’s a clear indicator that she’s in pain.

Haru gasps. “Oh goodness!” Body on autopilot, she pushes herself up on stable legs and races towards the doll. She falls onto her knees next to her, hands hovering over the other’s fallen form. Now a lot closer, Haru picks out each of the stitches keeping the doll together, black lines cutting up the arms of the doll and disappearing under the sleeves of her dress. She’s a strange mixture of a plush doll and a plastic one, having stitches like a plush doll but her arms very obviously look plastic up close. The cotton balls that make up her hair look soft to the touch, each of looking big enough to comfortably fit in her hand. Cognitive Haru looks up at her and her stitched mouth shifts into the bitter smile.

“<I was supposed t-t-to make sure you are the on-n-n-n-n-n-n-ne who was alright, but I suppose th-th-th-th-the roles have b-b-b-b-been switched.>” Even though the buttons never shift, Haru feels the gaze of Cognitive Haru move to sweep her body. “<Yo-o-ou do not see-e-e-e-e-em to be injured.>”

“I wasn’t,” Haru replies. The gaze sweeps up to her face. “I was just...shocked.”

“<I see-e-e-e-e-e.>” Cognitive Haru shifts into a more comfortable position, where the chains at her feet aren’t taut. “<Had m-m-m-m-my appeare-e-e-ence shocked you that much?>” Haru flinches and Cognitive Haru’s head lowers.

“O-oh, I was just surprised to see someone who shared my face,” Haru explains hurriedly. “I had been thrown in, you see, and I didn’t expect to see...you.” Normally she was much more eloquent when it came to interacting with other people, but she didn’t know how to react to someone who was quite literally an alternate version of herself.

“<I mu-u-st admit, I share your se-e-e-entiments,>” replies Cognitive Haru. “<Never would I have expe-e-e-ected the real version of myse-e-e-e-elf to appear in Father’s Palace.>”

Haru blinks. “You know who I am?”

Cognitive Haru smiles, or at least tries to, but the stitches that line her mouth pull down. The strain and effort to even offer a single smile is visible. “<Of cou-ou-ou-ourse I do. Not only do we ha-a-a-ve the same face, bu-u-u-u-u-u-t there is a particular presence you carry. You a-a-a-a-a-are not of this world.>”

“The workers outside didn’t recognize that.”

“<They are mi-i-i-i-i-indless. They are only al-l-l-l-llowed to follow o-o-o-orders. They do not ha-a-a-a-ave the capacity to think for themse-e-e-e-e-elves.>” Haru grimaces. The doll tilts her head. “<You are distraught. What is wro-o-o-o-ong?>”

“The robots of this world are real people in the actual one,” she snaps. “Please don’t talk about them like they’re objects.”

It isn’t fair to snap at a cognitive version of herself who she knows is only following the rules of the world she lives in, but Haru can’t help it. Knowing how much regard her father had for the workers of the company was one thing. Seeing it portrayed in robots who work until they die is…

Cognitive Haru hums in quiet static. “<This is Fa-a-a-a-a-ather’s cognitive world. If that i-i-i-i-i-is how he sees them, then that is how I-I-I-I-I-I-I will see them.>” Haru stares at her with dawning horror. “<Beca-a-a-ause that is what I have been taught b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-by Father. Everything he tell me to do, I w-i-i-i-ill follow.>”

There’s something in Haru, something telling her to get angry, to demand why Father thinks like this, why the cognitive version of herself looking like this, but she can’t muster the courage to act on it. So instead, she sighs, defeated.

“So this is how Father sees me as?” she asks, voice small. “A doll in a bride’s dress, branded for the person she is to marry?”

“<If tha-a-a-a-at is how you see it.>” Cognitive Haru turns to her chains and lifts her hand, the links clinging against each other. “<I only share wh-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-aat Father wills. I have acc-c-c-c-c-cepted that I am merely a pu-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-ppet to be us-s-s-s-s-sed by Father to reach furthe-e-e-e-e-e-e-er up the political ladd-d-d-dder, all to gain more and more wea-a-a-a-alth.>” She looks up at Haru. “<We are the sa-a-a-ame. We ar-r-r-r-re trapped. We are alone. We are fore-e-e-e-ever tied to Father’s wishes.>”

And isn’t that almost exactly how Haru felt? Trapped by her father, manipulated for his whims? She had been alone for so long, hidden under the shadow of her father and only taken out whenever he felt like it. She grew up to be a lady for him, learned ballet for him, listened to everything he said… Only for him to see her like this?

But…

Haru shakes her head. “We aren’t the same, not anymore,” she says. “I’m not alone anymore.”

Cognitive Haru shifts, tilts her head in confusion. “<Not al-l-l-l-lone? What do y-y-you mean?>”

 _It’s easy to think about them_ , Haru realizes. “I have friends with me now.”

“<Friends? What are tho-o-o-o-ose?>”

While her heart breaks a little at her counterpart’s ignorant question, Haru adjusts her seating to be comfortable and leaves her bag next to her.

“Friends,” she begins, “are people who care about you and love you. They don’t leave you alone even if you tried because that’s what friends do. They look out for each other.”

“<Really?>”

“Yes!” Haru beams, nodding. “I didn’t have friends until recently, but they’re all really nice people.” For some reason, Haru feels as if the doll is beaming at her as she tries her best to smile.

“<That sounds lov-v-v-vely. Can you te-e-e-ell me what they ar-r-e like?>”

“Of course!” Thinking to herself, Haru looks up to the ceiling. Even though she is talking to a cognitive version of herself, sharing the real names of her friends might be a tad too risky. “There is—Joker, yes Joker, who happens to be a leader of sorts of the group.”

“<A leader?>”

“Oh yes, the rest of friends and well as myself are rather drawn to him, but don’t be fooled! He’s rather silly! He loves to tease people!”

Cognitive Haru leans towards Haru a little, fascinated. Her head tilts. “<Fasc-sc-sc-sc-scinating.>”

Humming, Haru brings her hand up and starts counting on each of her finger as she describes each of the Thieves. “Joker’s boyfriend, Skull, is intimidating at first sight, but it’s just because of how he dresses and how he acts. He’s just a boy with a golden heart! Panther is really nice and she give lots of advice on fashion. Her parents are fashion designers, you see.”

“<Does she assist in orga-a-a-a-anizing your wardrobe?>”

“That’s makes her sound like a servant! No, she just comments on what looks good on me. She has quite the sweet tooth though! Then there’s Fox. He’s a rather strange one.”

“<I-I-I-I-Is that bad?>”

“Not exactly, Fox just lives on a different wavelength than the rest of us. He’s an artist, a prodigy. He’s completely taken by the arts though, so much so that the rest of us get worried, Oracle in particular. Oh, Oracle is his girlfriend and is spectacular with technology. She is rather shy, but her knowledge on all things technology is unparalleled! I have a hard time keeping up with her sometimes!”

Now Haru pauses, looking down at her lap. There is only one person she left out, after all.

“Queen is… I don’t really know what to call her,” she says.

“<Is she not your fr-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-riend?>” asks Cognitive Haru. Haru starts shaking her head, but then backpedals and nods, only to backpedal one more time to shrug.

“She is, but we recently became more than that…” Cognitive Haru’s head straightens.

“<Something more? Bu-u-u-u-u-ut that is not allowed.>”

Haru closes her eyes. She knows that, she knows that so well, what with weight of responsibility on her shoulders and the visible chains on Cognitive Haru, but… “You can’t help what you feel,” she admits. She opens her eyes and looks up at the doll. “I knew what I was getting myself into, telling Queen that I wanted to date her. I knew Father would never approve because she isn’t who Father chose.” She shakes her head. “But I don’t care. Even if Father disapproves, I wanted to decide who I loved because Sugimura will never, ever be that someone for me.”

Cognitive Haru stares. With the lack of actual eyes, Haru can’t tell if she’s looking right at her or over her shoulder.

“<I see,>” she says after a while. “<Will that suf-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-fice?>”

Haru’s eyebrow quirks. “Suffice? What do you—”

“It will do just nicely, Haru.”

 _No_.

Stomach dropping, chills racing up and down her spine, and dread rearing itself in her head, Haru freezes in place, petrified.

_No._

Cognitive Haru, as if unperturbed by her dawning horror, stands up. The chains around her arms and legs clatter and clunk, but she stands effortlessly. With her hands in front of her, she bows. Haru doesn’t need to turn to know exactly who it is.

“<Hello, Father.>”

* * *

“We’ve got a problem!” Some—minutes? Hours? Joker can’t tell, time is only a construct now—after they first came in, Oracle suddenly yells from her console, fingers going a million meters an hour. “An unknown baddie just entered the room!”

Joker’s eyes narrow behind his mask. _Rear and side covered. Number of robots dwindling._ “Do you know who it is?” he asks.

“No idea, just that their power level is nuts! Whoever this is, they’ve gotta be a bigwig in the Palace!”

“What are the chance of it being Okumura himself?”

A pause. Something explodes in the background and Fox recoils suddenly. He looks exhausted beyond all belief, but instead of resting he surges forward and hits a flying orb-like robot with a stream of ice. Panther, leaning into her seat with her eyes closed, concentrates all her power on Hecate. Skull’s yells from above have all but disappeared.

Oracle looks up from her console. “It’s extremely likely.”

Joker’s eyes flick to the side at the flaming blue motorcycle, her rider’s eyes glowing a brilliant cerulean as she lays waste on her targets with a well aimed shot from her pistol or a nuclear charged fist.

“Oracle, status.” Joker’s eyes dart forward once more.

“Back’s clear. They’re not sending anymore from behind us, it’s all in front,” she relays. As he turns his eyes on the road, a grin slides onto his face.

_It’s showtime._

“Skull, back inside! Fox, get back in here!” hollers the leader. He hears Skull fall back into the car and shut the skylight above just as Panther snuffs out the last of her flame and Fox collapses back into the seat in exhaustion. All of their Personas disappear. The only left is Anat and Queen.

“Oracle, Heat Riser.”

“Got it.” The air around Queen lights up a vivid rainbow.

“Queen,” Joker’s voice carries through the air with a clear cut. “Haru’s got company. We need you to get us there as fast as possible and clear a path. Can you do that?”

Hackles raised, body flaming nuclear radiation, Queen smirks. “You don’t even need to ask.”

And Anat roars, even louder than before. The streak of light blue next to the car speeds up and bolts forward, ramming into robots and crushing them under her wheels. She keeps a constant distance several meters from the car, but even from the safety of Mona’s windshield can Joker feel the very air start to burn.

Skull is giggling, relishing the tingle in the air. Panther looks excited, her eyes, as well as Joker’s, not leaving the motorcycle as it begins to shine brighter and brighter. Only Fox and Oracle’s eyes stray from Queen’s glowing form, the former exhausted and the latter with her eyes on her console.

It all happens in a split second.

Queen, racing in front of all of them, sits back, both hands off Anat’s handles and out to the sides. Her entire body is burning and flaring nuclear energy and in that second, all the energy surrounding her, building up around her, races to coalesce in her hands as single points.

The air stills—

—Then with a roar, she brings her hands together and with a resounding clap, the air _explodes_.

Electric blue shockwaves boom from Queen’s hands. All the robots piling in front of them start melting and breaking apart as soon as the shockwave hits them, shadows oozing out of them as they writhe, twisting and turning while the nuclear energy burns through their metal cases, destroying their insides. The burn in the air intensifies into a raging heat that Joker barely has the time to block with a Nuclear resistant Persona and he hears Skull and Panther whooping, feeling the amount of energy permeating the air and the heat racing all around their bodies. Oracle tends to Fox behind them all, talking to him in whispers while he breathes through the burn.

 _I need to treat Fox to an all you-can-eat buffet_ , Joker muses. _He deserves it._

With their biggest adversary now reduced to the melting remains of screaming robot corpses, the Monabus drives quickly through the halls. Though everyone stays on alert. Who knows when another batch of robots decides to come careening through the next open door.

 _“_ Awesome job, Queen! _”_ Panther commends.

“Aw hell yeah, Queen lettin’ loose is the sickest thing ever!” Skull whoops, pumping a fist in the air.

“Fine work,” says Fox, exhausted.

“Thanks a bunch, Queen,” Joker says with a grin. “Keep vanguard until we get to Haru. I’m betting my entire life savings on you ramming right through the biolock. When you do, Skull, take Panther and open the hole up a little more for us to get through.”

“Are you givin’ us permission to destroy that shitty biolock even more?” Skull’s smile is all shark teeth. Joker feels Panther’s brewing excitement. “‘Cause _hell yes_.”

Skull jumps up to the skylight and pries it open again. Once he climbs through, he offers Panther a hand and pulls her up onto the roof.

Seiten Taisei thunders back into existence. “Oracle, go into the duffel bag and get some coffee for Fox.” The navigator’s hand reaches out for the black duffel bag while Fox sinks back into the seat. “And Fox, go rest.”

“Already doing so, leader.”

Joker cracks his neck, rolling his head around his shoulders. “Alright, guys, it should only be a few more, if my intuiton’s correct. We’ve got no time to lose. Once we get to the room Haru’s in, we break in and get out as soon as possible. Got it?”

Their voices rise as one. “Got it!”

* * *

The man standing in front of the steel door is not her father.

At least, Haru can’t believe it’s her father.

Cognitive Haru lifts from her bow, but her head remains lowered, looking at the floor instead of at her father directly. Haru doesn’t move, afraid.

Shadow Okumura walks towards them without paying any heed to his daughter's greeting. He examines Haru, eyes raking her over.

“When I came to see what the commotion was,” he begins, “I never would have expected another version of my daughter to show her face within my space station.” His eyes grew hard. “Where are your manners? Haven’t you been taught to bow to your elders?”

Haru gasps and she hurries to stand up. “My apologies!” she exclaims. She bows at the waist, eyes shut tightly. “Hello, Father.”

She hears him tut in satisfaction. “Now then, was that so hard?” His footsteps move away from her. Cautiously, she lifts herself up, eyes darting to him.

Her skin crawls. Shadow Okumura stands next to Cognitive Haru, eyes looking over her other self, but he looks her over like she’s a commodity. A doll.

 _That’s because she is one_ , Haru realizes as Shadow Okumura lifts one of the doll’s arms and looks over the chains. He thumbs the chains, black gloves touching Cognitive Haru’s delicate white clad arm.

All the while, Cognitive Haru is still, letting Okumura have his way.

“W-What are you doing?” Haru asks. She can’t take her eyes away, no matter how much she wants to.

“I am checking her over, of course. I cannot sell her if she is damaged.” He moves to the other arm and runs his fingers along her sleeve. “Of course, this is only maintenance. It is a good thing I have already sold her, if she was damaged, then that responsibility is on Sugimura’s shoulders.”

Sold her.

Maintenance.

Damaged.

“You _sold_ me?” Her voice shudders dangerously, no the edge of falling over into tightly laced anger, so far hidden under her that it would normally would be under lock and key. “I thought it had just been a mutual agreement. You _told_ me it was just a mutual agreement.”

Shadow Okumura pulls away from the doll. “Foolish girl, of course I lied. Would you have agreed if I told you? Even you understand the amount of political power the Sugimura family has.” His expression brightens, as if he were being given a present he had desired for millennia. “Imagine my surprise when the family said they would accept my offer of giving you to them for the sake of widening my sphere of influence.”

“My parents _did_ say your daughter was simply a prize to have,” and from the door, which opened and closed yet again, Sugimura saunters in, leering at her.

“S-Sugimura-san…” Of _course_ there was a Cognitive Sugimura.

“Welcome, Sugimura, are you here to see your bride?”

The rascal’s eyes lighten up. “Of course! Let me see her.”

Shadow Okumura leads Cognitive Haru towards the door and she follows. The chains lengthen as they walk, beyond the length that stopped her before. Once the two of them stop in front of Sugimura, he immediately takes the doll’s arms and pulls them towards him.Wrapping his arms around the doll and leaning down to her head, he takes a deep inhale.

Haru does as well, willing herself not to lose the contents of her stomach on the steel floor.

Then Cognitive Sugimura _moans_ and his hands drift to the rest of Cognitive Haru’s body, around her waist, her arms, her hands, her chest. He caresses her through her clothes, leering down at her with a lecherous grin.

“Still the perfect bride,” he commends, lifting his face up.

“I would hope so. Have you considered the offer? Once she is part of your household in a few weeks, she will no longer be under my jurisdiction. You may take her as a lover or a concubine of sorts.”

Haru’s eyes widen. “Father?”

Ignored. “That offer was still open? I thought it wasn’t!” Two pairs of golden eyes turn to the real Haru. One of them hungry, the other contemplative. “What about that Haru? Is she part of the agreement as well?”

“They are the same, so I assume so. You can have your way with her, if you wish.”

“Excellent!” Sugimura lets go of the doll, who is still and bows her head back down once more. He turns and starts walks towards her purposefully. Hunger overtakes his eyes and blacken shadows start crawling out of arms and hands, snaking up to his face and down to his feet. His eyes glow fluorescent yellow as his grin starts elongating, but then widens far past what would be considered normal. Bones crack and flesh rips, the shadows bubbling around his form with each step, transforming him into something new.

His step grow heavier and heavier. The human of him disappears, leaving only a tall metal robot in his place.

“<DELICIOUS,>” he beeps, stomping on the ground. “<NOW I CAN HAVE TWO MORE TEENAGE MISTRESSES. WHAT A DREAM COME TRUE.>”

“Father you mustn’t serious!” Haru’s voice breaks out of her in a shrill wail, desperate eyes turning to Shadow Okumura. “You would offer me to be a… a _slut_ for someone like him?!”

“Whatever must be done,” Shadow Okumura replies, turning around. “You are an Okumura daughter. I expect you to behave as such. You should be like the doll.” He reaches out to Cognitive Haru once more and caresses the cotton balls of her hair. “Always obedient, always following what is told, never complaining to her father.” He reaches out for the doll again.

“No…” Haru staggers and Sugimura lumbers over her.

“No… I don’t want this…” The robot cackles.

“I can’t… I can’t believe you, Father. You would sell me, sell me for your own selfish gain. Where was that man who raised me all those years ago? The one who loved and cared for me even after Mother died? What happened to him?”

Shadow Okumura stills. “That old, weak self, is no longer here.”

Haru stops.

“I see.” Her awareness shifts, ignoring the enormous robot laughing.

“So that’s the truth.”

_“Indeed!”_

Haru buckles with a cry and falls on her knees. Pain, mind numbing pain unlike anything she’s ever felt shocks her body.

 _“You held quite the resistance, ma cherie. I was quite impressed. Imagine my surprise when the princess herself came to the realization that her king was a bastard of a man._ ”

“W-Who a-are—” Belatedly, she hears something crash. Her vision is hazy, the world red, but the sensation of something falling is unmistakable. The robot in front her falls over with a heavy slam. There’s yelling, outraged shouts from near the door before he familiar sound of a revving engine fills the air.

And Haru suddenly meets the eyes of an extremely worried Queen.

“Haru! Are—” Queen cuts herself off, staring wide eyed at Haru. “Your eyes…”

Another shot of pain bolts through her skull and she cries out. She feels Queen back away from her. She belatedly hears someone—Skull?—shout for her and Queen runs, footsteps stomping on the floor.

“ _Tell me, dear. What is it you desire most in this world?”_

“I want to be free…” Yes, that’s what she wanted most. Something smashes in front of her and more voices join the sudden commotion. A siren suddenly wails and more robotic voices ring out in the air.

_“But if you wish to claim your freedom, you will betray the man who has raised you.”_

“I no longer care. That man I thought I knew doesn’t exist. What’s left is a slime of a man, overtaken by greed and hunger. If I must betray him, then I will do it gladly.” The sounds around her raise in volume. She picks out Joker, Panther, Mona, all of the Phantom Thieves shouting and attacking, protecting her.

The pain in her head fades into a gentle hum.

_“Yes, yes darling! You know what you must do! Now, let us establish the contract!”_

Slowly, Haru pushes herself into her feet. She stands tall and opens her eyes. The Phantom Thieves had created a barrier around her and Sugimura, who was still in his full robotic glory. Scattered around Sugimura are robots attacking the thieves. It seems like the rat had summoned some minions.

It was time to get rid of them.

“ **_I am thou, thou art I._ ** ”

From her feet, blue flames burst out and funnel around her and on her face, the flames solidify into a black mask. She raises her hands to the mask, gripping the edges. The power in her screams for blood, overflowing into each of her limbs, into her fingers, itching to get out. She pulls. No give. She pulls harder. Pain flashes around her face and blood leaks out from the small wounds, but she isn’t done.

“ **_From the ashes of a princess once betrayed, rises an empress wreathed in beauty. Come, darling, let us make this a performance we will never forget!_ ** ”

With a ferocious shout, Haru tugs on the black mask with all her might and rips it off her face. The flames burst anew and spiral up all around her, covering her from the outside world. The space in her mind, hollowed by the burst of energy and power, fills with the comforting presence of pink pillowy dresses and enormous semi automatic cannons.

 _“Shall we give them a show?_ ”

The fire around her spins around faster, roaring, before it abruptly explodes into a shower of petals, raining down on all combatants and the girl clad in pink and black, golden eyes fading back to brown, a determined grimace on her visage.

“Gladly.”

Cognitive Sugimura, currently trying to smash his large, two pronged hand onto the darting Mona, perks up, the red light of his optic visor flashing.

“<YOU HAVE FINISHED WITH YOUR MAGICAL TRANSFORMATION? GOOD.>” His head whirls around and he breaks towards Haru, tearing through any of the minions in his path. “<I WAS GETTING TIRED OF WAITING.>”

In the corner of her eye, she notices Queen and Joker begin to intercept him. “Back off!” she shouts, stopping them in their tracks and making them turn wide eyed at her. She locks her gaze with Cognitive Sugimura. “He’s mine.”

“Uh—o-of course, Haru—” Joker stammers.

“Noir,” she breaks in. In her head, her Persona chortles in delight. “You can call me Noir.”

“<WHAT A GAME YOU PLAY, CALLING YOURSELF A DIFFERENT NAME,>” roars Sugimura, merely meters away from her. “<YOU WILL ALWAYS BE OKUMURA HARU AND MY LOVELY WIFE.>” The robot looms over her and H—Noir thinks of how, only a while ago, he had loomed over her cowering in fear, desperate for help. “<NOW SUBMIT!>” Cognitive Sugimura brings down his enormous arm down onto Noir’s small form—

“Persona!”

—but a pink fan with black feathers stops the descent, sparks flying off the impact and wind whipping from the collision. A Persona, dressed in large pink dress with only mask held up by a hand to serve as her face, stands tall over Noir. No one can see her mouth, but there’s a very strong suggestion that she is smiling.

Noir’s eyes narrow, her mask gone by the burst of flame. “From now on, you aren’t allowed to call me your wife, you wretched dog.” Her Persona pushes up against Cognitive Sugimura’s arm with so much force that he topples backwards, his small legs unable to hold up his weight.

“<YOU DAMNED—>”

“That is no way to talk to a lady,” chides the Persona. The eyes of her mask narrow at the robot. “You cretin, you should not be allowed to touch any ladies with those filthy hands of yours.”

“<I CAN AND I WILL. I AM THE FIRST SON OF SUGIMURA. I CAN DO WHAT I WANT.>”

“Wow, who would have known that the first son of Sugimura was a baby!” remarks Noir, examining her gloves as if she were examining her fingernails. “Tell me,” she begins as she starts walking towards the fallen robot with a smile on her face. “does the baby want to go to sleep?”

Cognitive Sugimura flails. “<NO I—>”

And suddenly Noir darts from the floor to up and above the robot’s body. She hangs there, airborne, before gravity kicks in and she raises her arm to the sky. The petals nearby race to her hand and they stick together, gradually forming something.

“Sleep.” As soon as Noir brings her arm back down straight into Cognitive Sugimura’s chest, the roses explode into sleek silver axe embedded with swirls and symbols, the long pole of the axe engraved with golden designs.

The axe cuts through Cognitive Sugimura like knife to paper, slicing into him cleanly. He spasms and screams and his arms try to pull the small girl off of him but he is too big to even get back up. Noir pulls the axe out of his chest with a grunt before, eyes glinting, changing target and going for his arm instead.

“Do you know how long,” the axe cuts straight through the right arm. “I’ve wanted to do this?” She turns and races to his left. “To punish you,” it flies off as easily as his other arm. “and let my anger out on you? Because you’re a self-entitled,” his legs separate from his body, leaving only his torso and head. “piece of _shit_ who wants to use me as a toy?”

“<A-A-A—>” Something stirs within Noir, directing her to his little head, the light blinking on and off and twitching sporadically. The smile on her face is all gone. Only a grim frown sits there and she walks up to his head and stares at him.

She raises her hand, closes it into a tight fist and the twitching head stops. The head is engulfed in a hot pink. It shudders. Then Noir thrusts her fist up to the sky in one fluid motion and the head _rips_ off the robot. It’s circuits fly into the air and the head floats there, still surrounded by pink. Wordlessly, Noir unclenches her hand and the robot’s head falls to the ground with a heavy thud.

“Consider this an annulment of the agreement,” she says, more than aware that her father, somewhere in the Palace by now if his lack of presence in the room is any indication, might be listening in. “and a announcement that the Phantom Thieves will be coming for your heart.” The body under her twitches. “Oh, you’re still alive? I would have thought ripping of your head would more than suffice snuffing out your life.” Noir looks up to her Persona. “Milady, may I ask for an assist?”

The corner of the mask’s eyes crinkle up. “Of course, my dear.” And Noir is pulled up in the air by a hot pink aura, remaining airborne over the robots twitching body—

Before she pulls out a grenade launcher from seemingly nowhere, aimmed right at Cognitive Sugimura’s body. She grins. “Goodbye now!”

At the end of it all, Noir stands in the midst of Cognitive Sugimura’s broken debris, scattered all over the room, even on the bed.

The bed—

“<What an amazing power,>” Cognitive Haru remarks, walking up to her real counterpart. She remembers seeing her being protected by Fox, who stands nearby, watching her silently. Noir’s eyes flit to her chains. Her chains, which were broken.

“Your chains are broken,” she says softly. The cognition nods.

“<Thanks to you,>” she says warmly. “<Your actions here have changed Father’s cognition, but not by much, I’m afraid.>” She lifts her arm up, the broken cuff barely hanging on. “He is aware of your disagreement with Sugimura, but he will not annul it.>”

“I expected as much.”

“<What will you do now? Will you continue to follow these thieves?>”

Noir nods. “Of course. I owe it to them, after all. They helped me realize what I needed most.”

Cognitive Haru lowers her head. “<What you needed most…>” She raises it just as quickly. “<Nonetheless, you should leave here. Father will be repairing the door soon.>” Noir didn’t even have a chance to look as the door from what was happening around her—

The door had a huge hole in it, the edges melted with loose circuits protruding out. What was left of the locks outside the door was only melted metal.

Noir’s eyebrows rose over her mask. “Oh my.”

“<Oh my indeed.>”

 

**September 23, 2016 (Evening)**

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : Holy shit

 **strawberry shortcake** : Holy shit

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : HOLY FUCKING SHIT

 **yeet** : aint that the biggest of moods

 **super fluffy** : asvdksgejshajdjdh

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : shdkdgsjskdhkej

 **strawberry shortcake** : agskdhdjsgfdbj

 **yeet** : look at them  
**yeet** : theyre drowning in their raging bisexuality/gayness  
**yeet** : 10000 yen makotos still in shock

 **Morganya** : we’d all lose instantly.

 **yeet** : exactly

 **super fluffy** : Haru  
**super fluffy** : I would gladly die under your axe

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : same

 **strawberry shortcake** : Big same

 **fists on wheels** : Agreed.

 **super fluffy** : SHOOT ME WITH YOUR GRENADE LAUNCHER

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : SAME

 **strawberry shortcake** : BIG SAME

 **fists on wheels** : YES PLEASE.

 **graphic design is my passion** : Welcome back to the land of the living, Makoto.

 **fists on wheels** : Is that what it is?  
**fists on wheels** : Because I still feel like I’m in heaven.

 **yeet** : makos raging gay has been revealed  
**yeet** : did u finally mop up all that drool u left on the floor

 **Morganya** : i think there was a still a puddle when we left okumura’s palace.  
**Morganya** : you know, amongst the robot remains.

 **yeet** : gross

 **mishimoon** : You guys are back!

 **Sets** : Where’s Haru-chan? Is she alright?

 **mints** : do we have to come in for an assist?

 **ultra fluffy** : i’m here! and safe~.

 **Morganya** : and reveling in the decomposition of half of our groups’ brain cells.

 **ultra fluffy** : ;)

 **yeet** : she doesnt even deny it  
**yeet** : the madwoman

 **Sets** : What happened?  
**Sets** : After that last text, you all went offline.

 **graphic design is my passion** : I don’t think Akira nor the others are coherent enough to say anything right now, so Futaba, Haru, Morgana, and I will explain.

 **yeet** : they were taken down  
**yeet** : defeated by harus savage hotness  
**yeet** : it was too much for them  
**yeet** : it was even too much for kurusu ‘walking euphemism’ akira  
**yeet** : u deserve an award haru

 **Sets** : Context?

 **Morganya** : haru awakened her persona!

 **mints** : huh

 **Sets** : Really?! That’s wonderful!

 **yeet** : yeah she awakened it while trapped in a room with her cognitive self, her creepy fiance, and her asshole of a dad

 **mints** : oh

 **Sets** : That’s...less wonderful.

 **yeet** : nah but u shouldve been there  
**yeet** : as soon as she awakened she called her cognitive fiance a baby  
**yeet** : and the as threw a goddamn temper tantrum

 **graphic design is my passion** : You were surprisingly crude, Haru. I never would have expected the like from someone of such a high standing as you.

 **ultra fluffy** : i did have a lot of pent up energy! besides, cognitive sugimura was kind of an asshole, why shouldn’t i insult him to his face?

 **yeet** : omg haru u just awakened ur persona r u gonna be throwing curses around now bc holy shit that raw power

 **graphic design is my passion** : As for why Akira, Ryuji, Ann, and Makoto are currently incomprehensible…

 **yeet** : haru sliced all the bots limbs off with an axe made from rose petals  
**yeet** : called him a piece of shit  
**yeet** : and ripped his head off  
**yeet** : and to add salt to the wound  
**yeet** : she destroyed like all his body with a grenade launcher  
**yeet** : it was the coolest shit

 **graphic design is my passion** : If only I had my sketchbook to forever record that event.  
**graphic design is my passion** : At least I can compensate with a painting of Haru’s deepest emotions, bursting out of her in a storm of petals.

 **Sets** : So you’re telling me that Haru destroyed her fiancé out of spite?

 **ultra fluffy** : i sure did!

 **mints** : i’m impressed  
**mints** : now akira’s reaction makes sense  
**mints** : how is he

 **Morganya** : cuddling ryuji right now and complaining that haru had no right to be that hot  
**Morganya** : lady ann and makoto are here too  
**Morganya** : i think they had enough of a meltdown that they literally can’t function.

 **yeet** : that raging bi/gayness

 **Morganya** : akira says that haru is makoto’s but he and ryuji wouldn’t be against going on a double date with them  
**Morganya** : so gross.

 **ultra fluffy** : i would love to!  
**ultra fluffy** : though i would rather discuss the details after makoto and i have our date! a first date is special, after all~.

 **yeet** : y is akira always ready to have a threesome

 **mints** : that’s just how he is  
**mints** : though he’s never been in a relationship to stay before

 **Sets** : Ryuji-kun does him good, they’ll both be fine.

 **yeet** : uh r u sure  
**yeet** : this is bonehead we’re talkin about  
**yeet** : the same guy who literally had to be restrained not to yell we’re the phantom thieves

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey! i dont do it as often anymore

 **Morganya** : i’d expect akira to be the first one to recover, not you, ryuji.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : im more gay than straight on the bi scale while akis smack in the middle  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : obvs id be the first one to snap out of it

 **yeet** : how long did that take to sink in

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : a good few months

 **Sets** : Ryuji-kun, I trust you can take care of Akira?

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : got u covered

 **Morganya** : we’re setting up for a sleepover right now since it looks like no one’s going to be leaving any time soon.

 **yeet** : sleepover?  
**yeet** : i want in!  
**yeet** : inari u good for comin too?

 **graphic design is my passion** : I suppose I can.

 **yeet** : what abt u haru?

 **ultra fluffy** : i’m invited?

 **yeet** : duh  
**yeet** : ur a thief now  
**yeet** : thieves r always invited to sleepovers  
**yeet** : this applies to u too npc  
**yeet** : and shiho too but shes too far

 **mishimoon** : Me?  
**mishimoon** : But I don’t go into the Metaverse like you do!

 **yeet** : ur our outside informant  
**yeet** : our backup  
**yeet** : the admin of our website  
**yeet** : ur a thief  
**yeet** : a thief of information

 **Morganya** : how long were you waiting to use that one?

 **yeet** : a long damn time

 **mishimoon** : I don’t have time tonight anyway, way too last minute.  
**mishimoon** : It’d be nice to go another time though!

 **ultra fluffy** : i as well.  
**ultra fluffy** : i had missed a meeting with my father, so i’m handling that right now.  
**ultra fluffy** : have fun!

 **yeet** : we’ll make sure when mako snaps out of it she’ll contact u first

 **Sets** : Go to sleep, children.

 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : night minato-san souji-san!!  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : good night to u too yuuki!

 **mishimoon** : Good night!

 **Morganya** : we'll talk about what happened tomorrow, okay haru?

 **ultra fluffy** : understood! good night!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Confirmed, Haru's is scary as shit. Updates should pick up after this. Stay tuned!


	22. rrrrrrrrrrrandom shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some more in-depth stuff about affinities and then we've got some SHENANIGANS. Also, a phone call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 22! Finally! 22 is here! Happy new year to y'all, have some thieving gays and more story! Gotta get these dates movin', you know.

**September 24, 2016 (Morning)**

**Phantom Thieves**

**Joker** : About yesterday…

**Queen** : You’re in class, young man.

**Joker** : So are you and look at where we are now.

**Queen** : I’ve been excluded from class for today in order to handle student council work. There’s been an influx due to the lack of an interim principal and the vice principal can only do so much.

**Panther** : You can do it, Queen!

**Queen** : Thank you, but you’re in class too. With Joker, no less.

**Joker** : Kawakami’s just doing review right now.

**Queen** : Is she supposed to?

**Joker** : No, but she’s giving everyone, specifically us, the chance to fool around.

**Fox** : A teacher assisting the Phantom Thieves? What a possibility I hadn’t expected.

**Queen** : And why are you on your phone, Fox?

**Fox** : I have already finished one of the pieces needed for my classes. I’m merely taking a break.

**Joker** : I’m pretty sure Skull’s gonna pop in sooner or later because he texts in class a lot, but does anyone know if Noir’s going to be on? I don’t think you’re in her class, right Queen?

**Queen** : I’m not.

**Noir** : I’m here!

**Panther** : Hi Noir!

**Fox** : Good morning.

**Noir** : Hello everyone!  
**Noir** : My, texting during school hours? Is this what it means to be a rebel?

**Skull** : Holy shit, if I didn’t see Noir brutally dismember a robot, I would’ve said how super innocent she is.

**Panther** : I mean, she’s still super innocent even while chopping a robot to pieces.

**Skull** : True, true. To be fair, Noir’d look innocent doing anything.  
**Skull** : Have you seen that face?

**Noir** : :)

**Skull** : Look at that.

**Joker** : There he is!  
**Joker** : Hi love~.

**Skull** : Sup sup!

**Oracle** : Refrain from being affectionate before my presence, worms.  
**Oracle** : I can hear the sap seeping out of my ears.

**Skull** : Wow.

**Joker** : What’s that, Oracle? You want me to send you selfies of us cuddling under a blanket?

**Oracle** : EW NO

**Skull** : Ooh ooh, there’s one on my phone from that time at my birthday party!

**Joker** : That one?

**Skull** : That one.

**Oracle** : WHICH ONE

**Joker** : :3c

**Oracle** : DON’T 3 MOUTH ME AKIRA

**Fox** : I would like it, if I’m not being intrusive. 

**Joker** : Of course.  
**Joker** : In the ‘Inari’ folder it goes.

**Fox** : Thank you.

**Noir** : Is it normally this lively? It’s wonderful!

**Queen** : Not usually. We’re usually more active in the afternoon, after school.  
**Queen** : How long are you all going to be on your phones?

**Joker** : Until the period’s over probably.

**Queen** : Wonderful.

**Noir** : Is that so? May I take this chance to ask you all something then?

**Queen** : What is it?

**Noir** : In Father’s Palace, I noticed there was a hole burned in the door to my cognitive self’s room. What happened?

**Queen** : Oh.

**Oracle** : Well… :)  
**Oracle** : That was Queen.

**Noir** : Really?

**Skull** : Oh man, you don't know what happened leading up to us getting you.  
**Skull** : The long and short of it is that Queen gathered all of her supreme gayness and plowed through both the biolock and the room’s door like wet paper.  
**Skull** : She melted a hole right through the door.  
**Skull** : Funnily enough, she also plowed right into Cognitive Sugimura with so much force that he fell over.  
**Skull** : The coolest shit!

**Noir** : So that’s why he fell!  
**Noir** : I was wondering as much, since I couldn’t really focus what with the awakening.

**Panther** : We understand!  
**Panther** : There’s a lot of pain behind awakenings, but the end is super worth it.  
**Panther** : Your awakening was really cool! I’ve never seen the awakening fire become rose petals before.  
**Panther** : And when you got your axe from the petals, I was screaming!

**Oracle** : Like, legit screaming.  
**Oracle** : But my dudes, we’re all missing the elephant in the room: when Noir ripped FuckFace McGee’s head off.

**Joker** : That was fucking scary and hot.

**Skull** : Hell yeah it was.

**Panther** : Sentiments shared.

**Fox** : Rather violent, but your passion shone through very brightly. I was impressed and a little frightened.

**Queen** : It looked like that was the power Noir manifested. Do you know what affinity you have?

**Noir** : Affinity?

**Oracle** : Yeah! An affinity is the element your Persona is linked to! All of the Phantom Thieves have one, like how Queen’s affinity is nuclear, Panther’s is fire, Fox’s is ice, etc. etc.

**Joker** : It looks like she has a psychic affinity.

**Queen** : I was going to say the same thing.  
**Queen** : Only Joker has had a Persona with a psychic affinity, so we are familiar with it, but I believe you’re the only Persona user in our group with psychic as their main affinity.

**Oracle** : Duh!  
**Oracle** : She ripped a head off with mind powers! Of course she has a psychic affinity!

**Panther** : Does that mean she’s a psychic?

**Skull** : Can you read minds?

**Noir** : I don’t believe so, but I haven’t tried.  
**Noir** : Um, could you explain affinities a little more? I’m afraid I’m a little confused.  
**Noir** : If I have the ability to life someone with my mind, am I supposed to have another power?

**Joker** : There are two components when it comes to the powers from our affinities.  
**Joker** : One component is shared between all people of the same affinity. It’s a power that’s almost always active in the real world unconsciously. It’s more a side effect because of your Persona. The awakening changes your mental and physical state in response to accepting yourself.  
**Joker** : For example, all users with a fire affinity can willfully raise the temperature of a room they’re in while ice affinity users can lower it. Electric affinity users can absorb electricity and constantly generate it while the air around a wind affinity user is probably the cleanest air you’ve ever breathed.

**Panther** : You never gave us this explanation!

**Joker** : I asked Minato-senpai when I accidently fell into the shadow of a lamp and ended up in Iwatodai.

**Queen** : When was that?!

**Joker** : A few hours ago.

**Skull** : Like today?!

**Joker** : Yep yep.

**Panther** : That’s why you were late!

**Oracle** : And you never got us coffee, you ass.

**Joker** : Next time, next time.

**Fox** : Does that mean Mona is a breath of fresh air?

**Oracle** : INARI

**Panther** : Oh my god Fox.

**Noir** : That was a good one!

**Joker** : Fox please.  
**Joker** : Anyway, there’s that component. The second component is what we consider our special powers. Sometimes it represents our Persona, sometimes it’s just a power no one else has, but it’s a power unique to each of us individually. We can use these in the real world and the Metaverse, but it’s weaker in the real world.

**Noir** : So when Panther breathes fire or when Skull shoots electricity from his hands, it’s their special powers?

**Skull** : Yeah! Knowin’ how all of us got two powers, you gotta have two also, yeah?  
**Skull** : Logical conclusion and all.

**Queen** : Correct.  
**Queen** : I hope you don’t mind us testing that out in the Palace later today. We’ll need to find out as soon as possible in order to correctly catalogue your strengths and weaknesses.

**Noir** : Of course, I wouldn’t mind!  
**Noir** : But if my power is psychic related, how I am going to find out what my other power is?

**Joker** : Test it on us, of course.

**Noir** : What? Are you sure?

**Skull** : Are you kiddin’? I’m so down!

**Fox** : It will be an experience we will never forget.

**Joker** : If you end up hurting us or something, a quick Diarama will fix it up in no time. We had to do this for the rest of us too, so don’t be so hung up.

**Panther** : *cough*Skull*cough*

**Skull** : Why’re you callin’ me out, miss ‘I sneezed on Joker’s jacket and burnt half of it off’?!

**Panther** : First of all, that was completely accidental, as are all sneezes and second of all, you’re welcome for that!

**Joker** : Mona says he’ll always remember how red Skull became on that day.  
**Joker** : Honestly big same.

**Skull** : Hey!

**Queen** : Let’s not forget our foray to find out my powers…

**Fox** : I’d prefer to forget about that actually.

**Panther** : There’s never been so many times I’ve been grateful for my heat tolerance.  
**Panther** : Oh, five minute alarm, period’s about to end.

**Joker** : Oh shit.  
**Joker** : Alright gang, real quick.  
**Joker** : We’re going to Okumura’s Palace today. Bring yourselves and your weapons. Noir, I have a sneaking suspicion I know what your other power is, but to test out the first one, we’re gonna need a scale. Is there one in your house, Oracle?

**Oracle** : A perfectly functioning electric one.

**Joker** : Haul it over to LeBlanc after we finish class.

**Oracle** : Got it.

**Joker** : Alright y’all, see you later.

 

 

“Hm… lifted clean off his feet and right into the ceiling. Changed standing orientation too. How’re you feeling, Skull?!”

The masked charge commander only chortles with glee as he jumps from the ceiling, entire body covered in pink and kicks his foot right into the eyeball of a Decarabia and flings it right into a window. “Fuckin’ fantastic, Oracle!”

“The extra weightlessness is helping, but from how much he’s not floating in circles, I’m guessing you have most of the control over him.”

“I think I do? Yes, I do.”

“How much does he weigh? Can you let him down, Noir?”

“Last time he checked, 61 kilograms.”

“...How do you even know that, Joker?”

“Don’t ask.”

 

 

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**super fluffy** : youllneverseeitcoming1.jpeg   
**super fluffy** : youllneverseeitcoming2.jpeg   
**super fluffy** : youllneverseeitcoming3.jpeg 

**Sets** : What.

**super fluffy** : Wait one more  
**super fluffy** : squadgoals.mov

**mishimoon** : Oh my god.  
**mishimoon** : Oh my god?????

**shihohoho** : oh my goddddd,,,,

**super fluffy** : These are you saviors Yuuki  
**super fluffy** : Do we meet the adequate criteria

**mishimoon** : Uh.

**super fluffy** : I’ll take that as a maybe

**mishimoon** : Why are you in space?  
**mishimoon** : Jumping on robots??  
**mishimoon** : And posing on their remains?????

**mints** : looks cool

**super fluffy** : Thanks Minato-senpai  
**super fluffy** : This is the Phantom Thief business Yuuki  
**super fluffy** : We go around stealing hearts  
**super fluffy** : While also acting like little shits

**mishimoon** : Oh my god I can’t take Makoto-senpai seriously ever again

**super fluffy** : Haru got her tongue in deep

**mishimoon** : KURUSU

**super fluffy** : Lmao

**shihohoho** : ann in red leather is a blessing amen

**super fluffy** : @strawberry shortcake I told you your girlfriend would be super gay for your outfit  
**super fluffy** : How much blackmail do you think I have to collect to convince Kanji-senpai to recreate these outfits

**mints** : he’d do it for free as long as he’d see you in it at least once

**super fluffy** : High order but doable

**Sets** : I have to give you all credit where credit’s due. That video of all of you individually jumping on Shadows yelling battle cries is sick.

**super fluffy** : Please never say sick ever again old man

**Sets** : MY GENERATION NORMALIZED THE TERM FOOL  
**Sets** : GO BACK TO YOUR METAVERSE SHENANIGANS

**super fluffy** : Wait hold up there’s actually one more I’ve gotta share  
**super fluffy** : BUFFHARU.jpeg

 

 

**September 24, 2016 (Evening)**

**Phantom Thieves**

**Joker** : I want that entire album sent to my phone, Oracle.

**Oracle** : Of course, leader!

**Noir** : That was fun!  
**Noir** : At least we can confirm I can lift around 100 kilograms with my mind.  
**Noir** : Though that second power…

**Joker** : It’s probably better to test that in the real world, but it looks like the whole lifting things with your mind is your unique power.

**Noir** : I don’t suppose there are any psychic affinity users in the Shadow Operatives?

**Joker** : From what Souji-senpai and Minato-senpai told me, nuclear and psychic Persona users are actually super rare. You and Queen are in the same boat.

**Queen** : Hm, that makes sense.

**Noir** : How interesting!

**Skull** : Dude, I don’t wanna be in your of sight if you’re angry.  
**Skull** : You could lift me clean off my feet and throw me into the sun.

**Fox** : Please juggle Skull and Mona again once you have the chance; that was quite entertaining.

**Noir** : You were surprisingly light, Fox. How much do you eat?

**Oracle** : NOT ENOUGH

**Joker** : The poor boy’s our resident stick.  
**Joker** : He prefers art over food.

**Fox** : My usual diet involves bean sprouts and the occasional Jagariko.

**Noir** : …

**Queen** : I suddenly have a bad feeling about this.

**Noir** : Fox…

**Skull** : uH.

**Panther** : Should we be having a prayer circle for Fox? I feel like he needs it.

**Mona** : Hold on.

**Noir** : Joker, are we taking any break days anytime soon?

**Joker** : The 25th’s free for the NoirQueen date and I’d like to finish this Palace as quick as possible for your sake, but I’m open with taking any day free. We do have until the 11th, after all.

**Noir** : Alright.  
**Noir** : 26th, after school, my driver will pick both of us up.

**Fox** : Oh.  
**Fox** : Am I allowed to decline?

**Skull** : SAY NO

**Panther** : SAY NO HE NEEDS THE FOOD

**Noir** : Nope!  
**Noir** : Make sure you’re free, Fox!

**Oracle** : I’ll make sure he is.  
**Oracle** : I can’t believe my favorite stick is actually going out for groceries.  
**Oracle** : You’re a hero, Noir.

**Noir** : Thank you.  
**Noir** : As for Sunday…  
**Noir** : Queen?

**Queen** : Yes?

**Noir** : Prepare yourself. :)

**Queen** : Excuse me, I’ll talk to all of you tomorrow, I need to search my closet.

**Joker** : NOIR PLEASE

**Panther** : Good luck, Queen!  
  
  


**Kurusu Akira → Sakamoto Ryuji, Takamaki Ann, Sakura Futaba**

**Kurusu Akira** : So are we following them

**Takamaki Ann** : Duh.

 

 

**September 25, 2016 (Noon)**

**Akechi Goro → Suzui Shiho**

**Akechi Goro** : Suzui-san, I’ll be stopping by Inaba for a little while. Would you like to go out in the afternoon for some food?

**Suzui Shiho** : Akechi-kun! Of course, that would be fine.  
  
**Akechi Goro** : Did Souji-san get the files I sent?

**Suzui Shiho** : It's a little strange that you e-mailed them to me me, Akechi-kun. You’re usually extremely cautious when it comes to tech.

**Akechi Goro** : I rely on Fuuka-san’s protection over everyone in the Shadow Operatives and that trust has yet to fail me.

**Suzui Shiho** : I forwarded him what you sent. Is it from the same person?

**Akechi Goro** : Indeed. Her files are extremely easy to procure.

**Suzui Shiho** : But she’s the head scientist, isn’t she? Shouldn’t she be more aware of what’s going on?

**Akechi Goro** : She’s been busy. One of the projects she’s been working on for years is almost to completion.  
**Akechi Goro** : Father’s been hounding her.

**Suzui Shiho** : And how are you?  
**Suzui Shiho** : Are you okay?

**Akechi Goro** : I…  
**Akechi Goro** : Could be better.

**Suzui Shiho** : There’s a cafe in Okina I know you’ll like. I’ll send the address. Meet me there, okay?

**Akechi Goro** : Alright. Thank you.

 

 

**September 26, 2016 (Morning)**

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**super fluffy** : So yeah we’re never gonna try to spy on a Makoharu date every again

**ultra fluffy** : :)

**fists on wheels** : You deserve it.

**super fluffy** : You!!!!  
**super fluffy** : Flung a fork!!!!  
**super fluffy** : At me!!!!

**strawberry shortcake** : I legit thought I was gonna die

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : same  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : thank god for electric powers

**strawberry shortcake** : Fuck you and your electromagnetism

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : :)

**yeet** : she didnt throw a fork at me

**fists on wheels** : I would rather let you go than face the wrath of Sakura-san.

**ultra fluffy** : i agree. he’s seems to be the type of man who would skin someone alive for hurting futaba-chan.

**yeet** : hell yeah that’s my dad

**super fluffy** : I would say fuck you and your overprotective dad but the walls have eyes and Sojiro would punt me into the moon if I actually said that

**fists on wheels** : It was easy to pinpoint you all anyway.  
**fists on wheels** : Who in their right mind wears t-shirts and shorts to a 5 star restaurant?

**super fluffy** : I admit I thought Haru was gonna take you to a park or some shit not a restaurant in one of the most high end buildings in the country  
**super fluffy** : But at that point we were too far gone to stop following you so we said fuck it

**strawberry shortcake** : We didn’t give up!!!

**yeet** : the resto was super fancy tho props haru

**ultra fluffy** : thank you~!  
**ultra fluffy** : while it’s not the most fancy restaurant i’ve been to, you must admit, it has the best view to look over tokyo, especially at night.

**yeet** : it sure did

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : not the best??????  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : whats the best??

**ultra fluffy** : secret. ;)

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : u high end folks r gonna kill me

**fists on wheels** : I had fun though, Haru.  
**fists on wheels** : Next time, I’ll pick the date spot.

**super fluffy** : Do you need a list of optimal date spot locations because I’ve got you from the moon and back

**strawberry shortcake** : I know a couple of really good crepe spots!

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : There’s a buncha parks in Tokyo, maybe u guys could go out on a run or smth??? 

**yeet** : romantic ryuji

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shut up

**fists on wheels** : It’s okay, guys. I don’t need help.

**super fluffy** : Are you sure

**strawberry shortcake** : Are you sure

**fists on wheels** : Yes.

**super fluffy** : Hmm  
**super fluffy** : doubt.png

**fists on wheels** : I’ll be fine!  
**fists on wheels** : Let’s talk about it between each other, Haru.

**ultra fluffy** : alright~.

**super fluffy** : Boo not sharing?  
**super fluffy** : No fun

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : u just wanna cause drama

**super fluffy** : Yep  
**super fluffy** : Speaking of drama  
**super fluffy** : I’ve found some oldies dramas in some of the boxes Sojiro left in the attic  
**super fluffy** : Wanna watch it later?

**strawberry shortcake** : I’m down!

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : sorry gotta pass

**super fluffy** : Oh? What’s up?

**fists on wheels** : That was the bell. Class now, children.

**super fluffy** : Yes Momkoto

 

 

**September 26, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**yeet** : BYEINARI.jpeg  
**yeet** : AND THEYRE GONE  
**yeet** : OKUMURA HARU IS A BLESSING TO THIS WORLD

**fists on wheels** : Please bring him back safely, Haru.

**ultra fluffy** : don't worry, he'll be back with enough groceries to fill his entire dorm room!

**fists on wheels** : Haha, that was a joke, right?

**ultra fluffy** : :)

**fists on wheels** : Haru?  
**fists on wheels** : Haru?!?!!?!

 

 

_ <”Hello?” _

_..._

_“Hi, Goro.”_

_..._

_“It went fine, as usual. I’ve been confined to bed rest, but Asami-san said I should be better by tomorrow.”_

_..._

_“Don’t fuss over me, Goro, I’m fine. They have medicine here. Well, too much, but I can’t ask for much now, can I.”_

_..._

_“Yes, it’s a good day today. I’m sorry about all the bad days, not talking to you and all…”_

_..._

_“Shido-san is leaving me alone until I recover. Then…”_

_..._

_“3 days.”_

_..._

_“You’re lucky this is a private line or Shido-san would’ve punched you for calling him a bitch.”_

_..._

_“Yes. She knew it was one of my good days, so she let me call you. Speaking of, she wants to know if the information she let you snatch is coming in handy.”_

_..._

_“I’m assuming after the next job. Apparently someone has been annoying him, so he wants me to get rid of them as soon as possible.”_

_..._

_“I should be saying that to you. You’re the one who should be careful.”_

_..._

_“...Will it help?”_

_..._

_“Have you told them anything? About Asami-san, about… me?”_

_..._

_“When will you tell them?”_

_..._

_“A few months…”_

_..._

_“I don’t know if I can handle a few more months, Goro. I’m terrified he’ll break me more than he has already.”_

_..._

_“...Alright.”_

_...._

_“I love you too, Goro.” > _

_*click*_

 

 

**Sakamoto Ryuji → Kurusu Akira**

**Sakamoto Ryuji** : uh  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : i dont think i can go to the palace for the next few days

**Kurusu Akira** : What? What’s wrong?

**Sakamoto Ryuji** : i think im comin down with somethin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sneeze*
> 
> * * *
> 
> There's a lot planned for the latter half of the fic, so I've gotta set up. We'll be seeing a lot of Goro from here on out. (Have I said that already? Maybe.)
> 
> What's that? More Shiho and Mishima too? Huh.


	23. *sneeze*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have a sick boy, a boy looking for the said sick boy, and a moon boy. Also, ROAST.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory sickfic here. And a moment. I'm sleepy. Good night.

**September 29, 2016 (Morning)**

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**super fluffy** : Ryuuuuuuuuuu  
**super fluffy** : Ryuuuuuuuuji

 **Sets** : He’s still at it?

 **fists on wheels** : Has been for the past few days.

 **super fluffy** : RyUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

 **yeet** : i dont know if i should be grossed out or find this whole thing sweet

 **graphic design is my passion** : If you find it sweet, won’t that interfere with your character?

 **yeet** : ur right  
**yeet** : stop being gross kurusu  
**yeet** : ryujis just sick  
**yeet** : its not like hes dead

 **super fluffy** : Don’t even joke about that Futaba  
**super fluffy** : But I mISS MY BOY

 **strawberry shortcake** : I stopped by on the way to school  
**strawberry shortcake** : Hiroko-san said he’s better than yesterday

 **ultra fluffy** : that’s a relief!  
**ultra fluffy** : i hoped the soup i brought in helped him.

 **fists on wheels** : Is there any definitive date he’s going to be let out of the house?

 **strawberry shortcake** : Dunno  
**strawberry shortcake** : She just said he broke his fever yesterday and that he’ll be better in no time

 **yeet** : he better be  
**yeet** : i dont think i can deal with a starving akira for any longer  
**yeet** : u think ryujis mom gave him back his phone

 **strawberry shortcake** : Maybe

 **graphic design is my passion** : To my knowledge, an ill person shouldn’t be using their phone until they are completely healed. I believe we won’t see no hide nor hair of him for a few more days.

 **super fluffy** : RyuUuuuuUUUuuuuuuUUUUUuUu

 **yeet** : i will march over to u and throw ur phone into a river dont even test me

 **fists on wheels** : Please don’t.

 **super fluffy** : I’m sooooooo bored tho  
**super fluffy** : And Ryu’s usually the only one with enough guts to text me during class

 **strawberry shortcake** : Cough

 **super fluffy** : Ryu and Ann are the only ones with enough guts to text me during class

 **yeet** : what do i not exist

 **super fluffy** : You don’t have class in the first place you don’t count

 **yeet** : rude

 **fists on wheels** : Should I even try to convince you to not use your phone in class?

 **super fluffy** : It failed the first 20 times I don’t think a 21st time will make it any different  
**super fluffy** : Don’t you know I live to rebel against the standards of society  
**super fluffy** : I text during class  
**super fluffy** : I make weapons in my room  
**super fluffy** : I’m wearing mismatched socks today

 **strawberry shortcake** : Ooooh can I see

 **super fluffy** : That’s so much work  
**super fluffy** : I have to reach down  
**super fluffy** : Pull up the ends of my pants  
**super fluffy** : And zip down my boots

 **strawberry shortcake** : Lemme see

 **super fluffy** : One sec

 **fists on wheels** : Please don’t tell me he’s actually doing it.

 **mishimoon** : He is.  
**mishimoon** : I can hear his boot from the other end of the room.

 **yeet** : pppfffttttttttt  
**yeet** : not even subtle

 **fists on wheels** : And what are you doing online, Yuuki-kun?

 **mishimoon** : The teacher usually pays attention to Kurusu-kun more than me, so I’m usually free to do what I want.

 **super fluffy** : polkadots.jpeg  
**super fluffy** : Red and white polka dots and white and blue stripes

 **strawberry shortcake** : Nice

 **fists on wheels** : You walking disaster.

 **super fluffy** : Thanks I try

 **ultra fluffy** : that looks hideous.  
**ultra fluffy** : good job!

 **super fluffy** : Thanks Haru roast me on an open flame for my ashes to get scattered to the wind

 **fists on wheels** : You’re clearly not okay.

 **super fluffy** : No I am no  
**super fluffy** : I’m suffering through Ryuji withdrawal  
**super fluffy** : Where is my beautiful boy  
**super fluffy** : He’s been taken by the hands of the diseased, forced in a bed to lay as he waits for reprieve from his illness  
**super fluffy** : Darling, I miss you so…

 **yeet** : its been 0 days since our last nonsense

 

 

**Sakura Futaba — > Sakamoto Ryuji**

**Sakura Futaba** : ur online i can see u bonehead u cant hide from me

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : pls dont tell anyone im not supposed to be on my phone rn  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : and it’s too funny watchin aki be existential

 **Sakura Futaba** : dammit sakamoto

 

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : Is it possible to astral project myself out of this classroom and into Sakamoto Ryuji’s arms

 **strawberry shortcake** : No you can’t I need my source of entertainment

 **super fluffy** : I’m not a commodity Ann  
**super fluffy** : I have feelings

 **strawberry shortcake** : Then do something other than whine, Kurusu

 **super fluffy** : NEVER  
**super fluffy** : I WILL NOT CEASE  
**super fluffy** : UNTIL I HEAR RYU’S VOICE WITH MY OWN TWO EARS  
**super fluffy** : I CAN’T ANYWAY I’M IN CLASS

 **fists on wheels** : AKIRA.

 **super fluffy** : catchthesehands.png

 **yeet** : memeing to escape punishment?  
**yeet** : ur becoming me

 **super fluffy** : begone.png

 **yeet** : eatass.png

 **super fluffy** : wack.png

 **fists on wheels** : I’m going to mute this chat.

 **super fluffy** : Please don’t

 **fists on wheels** : I can’t anyways.  
**fists on wheels** : How else are you going to get your daily dose of attention if no one else is here to give it to you?

 **super fluffy** : I

 **strawberry shortcake** : ROAST HIM

 **yeet** : applycoldwatertoburnedarea.png

 **ultra fluffy** : that was delightful, mako-chan!

 **mints** : i cant believe akira died before my very eyes

 **mishimoon** : AGDKDGDKDHJ I JUST HEARD A THUNK

 **strawberry shortcake** : AKIRA JUST HIT HIS HEAD ON HIS DESK OMFG  
**strawberry shortcake** : I CAN HEAR HIM  
**strawberry shortcake** : HE’S MAKING NOISES

 **ultra fluffy** : i think you broke our leader!

 **fists on wheels** : Oh shit.  
**fists on wheels** : Akira?

 **strawberry shortcake** : HE’S LAUGHING

 **super fluffy** : Guys it happened,,,,,  
**super fluffy** : I HAVE BEEN ROASTED BY EVERYONE IN THE PHANTOM THIEVES WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE HAHAHA  
**super fluffy** : EVEN YUUKI

 **mishimoon** : When did I roast you????

 **super fluffy** : Way back when  
**super fluffy** : Like months back  
**super fluffy** : You called me a hobo with designer glasses

 **strawberry shortcake** : wHAT

 **yeet** : hOLY shOIT NPC

 **strawberry shortcake** : shoit

 **mints** : shoit

 **yeet** : STOP CALLING ME OUT

 **mishimoon** : I DIDN’T THINK YOU WOULD REMEMBER!

 **super fluffy** : I DID THO  
**super fluffy** : AS LONG AS WE DON’T HAVE ANY NEW MEMBERS IN THE PT THEN I’VE BEEN ROASTED BY EVERYONE  
**super fluffy** : YES

 

 

**September 29, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**Kurusu Akira → Sakamoto Ryuji**

**Kurusu Akira** : Ryu?  
**Kurusu Akira** : Are you doing okay?  
**Kurusu Akira** : Futaba messaged me a minute ago saying you were online

 **Sakmaoto Ryuji** : wow i told her not to say anythin  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : hiya aki!

 **Kurusu Akira** : Thank the stars  
**Kurusu Akira** : How’re you feeling?

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : like an absolute shitstain but hey  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : thats how i feel everyday

 **Kurusu Akira** : Ryuji.

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : sorry sorry  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : ma’s still got me on meds  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : im tired as all hell but im outta my bed finally

 **Kurusu Akira** : That’s good! 

**Sakamoto Ryuji** : sure is  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : ma said she doesnt want me to become the newest blanket on the couch  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : sorry bout not answerin and shit

 **Kurusu Akira** : Hey you being sick at home is enough reason to not answer  
**Kurusu Akira** : I thought we wouldn’t hear from you for at least another few days

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : ehehehe snatched my phone from under ma’s nose 

**Kurusu Akira** : Now see I’m conflicted  
**Kurusu Akira** : Should I be the doting boyfriend or the rebel hottie

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : u can be the doting rebel hottie boyfriend who wont call me out

 **Kurusu Akira** : Well unfortunately for you all instincts to keep you safe and healthy override everything telling me to be a rebel  
**Kurusu Akira** : Put your phone down

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : how am i gonna talk to u thooooooooooooo

 **Kurusu Akira** : …  
**Kurusu Akira** : You bring up a good argument

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : learned from the best!

 **Kurusu Akira** : Damn  
**Kurusu Akira** : You’re not letting me be responsible

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : i wanna talk to uuuuuuuuuuu  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : it suck bein at home and forced to sleep  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : usually thatd be pretty fuckin rad but it’s so boring

 **Kurusu Akira** : Have you consumed

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : cant taste shit but yes i ate

 **Kurusu Akira** : Do you think you can taste curry with that tongue

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : i don’t even think i can taste satans asshole with this tongue  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : okay tell me to never type anythin like that again

 **Kurusu Akira** : That brain to mouth filter’s gone, huh

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : says the one w/out a filter

 **Kurusu Akira** : yougotmethere.png

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : should sick people even eat curry  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : that shits spicy af  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : but i know u cant cook anything save curry so

 **Kurusu Akira** : Excuse me

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : what i havent seen u cook anything other than curry babe  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : and no coffee doesnt count

 **Kurusu Akira** : What about coffee  
**Kurusu Akira** : Oh  
**Kurusu Akira** : Fine then I’ll make something for you and bring it to your house tomorrow  
**Kurusu Akira** : I’m gonna regale you with my cooking skills

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : nothin beat ma’s homemade cooking but im open for challengers

 **Kurusu Akira** : Oh it’s on 

**Sakamoto Ryuji** : u gotta make it spicy so i can taste

 **Kurusu Akira** : So like the entire jar of spice?

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : id like to live thanks

 **Kurusu Akira** : Don’t worry I think I know what I need to do  
**Kurusu Akira** : You however should  
**Kurusu Akira** : And I’m gonna emulate Mona here  
**Kurusu Akira** : gottosleep.png

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : OH MAN U MADE MONA A MEME

 **Kurusu Akira** : I would be skinned alive if he saw this luckily he doesn’t watch when I’m texting you because he says we’re gross so I’m a-oka

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : i don’t wanna sleep

 **Kurusu Akira** : Okay then here’s the deal  
**Kurusu Akira** : You put that phone down and heal  
**Kurusu Akira** : And I’ll send you wholesome dog pictures every 30 minutes

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : too long  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : 5 minutes

 **Kurusu Akira** : 20 minutes

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : 10 no take backs

 **Kurusu Akira** : Deal  
**Kurusu Akira** : essentials.png  
**Kurusu Akira** : Now put it down

 **Sakamoto Ryuji** : gotta dash babe  
**Sakamoto Ryuji** : love u!!!!!!!

 **Kurusu Akira** : Love you too <3 <3 <3

 

 

**September 30, 2016 (Evening)**

**Oracle** : @Skull

 **Skull** : ‘M here!

 **Queen** : Are you feeling okay?

 **Skull** : Much better than the last few days. Hopefully I’ll be back to good enough shape tomorrow.

 **Mona** : If you’re not, we’re gonna make you stay home like last time!

 **Oracle** : Yeah, last time we all met up, you sneezed on Joker.  
**Oracle** : I’m surprised he’s not sick yet.

 **Joker** : I am an almighty being.  
**Joker** : Anyway, you want a recap?

 **Skull** : You guys still went to Okumura’s Palace, yeah?

 **Noir** : We did, but we went to Mementos as well.

 **Joker** : We wanted to show Noir some of Mementos and we cleared up some of Yuuki’s requests too.

 **Skull** : Did you deal with those asshole adults given’ Kawakami-sensei shit?

 **Joker** : Unfortunately we couldn’t wait on that one so we did.

 **Skull** : ‘S cool.

 **Oracle** : Nah, you should be happy you didn’t have to go to Okumura’s Palace!  
**Oracle** : The rest of that factory was a PIECE OF SHIT.

 **Fox** : It was… taxing.

 **Joker** : On the days we weren’t in the Palace, I just made curry the whole afternoon.

 **Panther** : Can confirm.

 **Skull** : So y’all actually ran out of energy?  
**Skull** : We have 50 billion kinds of food and meds in the duffel bag.  
**Skull** : Don’t tell me you all actually used all that shit up.

 **Panther** : Let me tell you.

 **Skull** : Uh huh?

 **Panther** : Those things with a physical repellent can eat my ass.

 **Oracle** : eatass.png

 **Queen** : Oracle.

 **Oracle** : I know, no memes on the serious chat.  
**Oracle** : I couldn’t resist!

 **Panther** : The workers were also surprisingly resistant.  
**Panther** : But also melted under my fire so it was a piece of cake.

 **Joker** : Burn me.

 **Panther** : You’ve already been roasted enough today, Joker.

 **Skull** : What’re we up to now?

 **Joker** : Probably the coolest part of the whole Palace: actual outer space!

 **Skull** : Aren’t we already in space though?

 **Noir** : It’s actually right outside the space station itself!

 **Skull** : No way!

 **Oracle** : I know!

 **Skull** : Are you for real??

 **Panther** : As real as we could get!

 **Fox** : Joker refused to continue forward without you, so we’ve been on stasis for a while.

 **Queen** : At least we’ve had a break.

 **Noir** : Indeed!  
**Noir** : Joker did begin helping me with a little side project of mine. He was of much help!  
**Noir** : And Fox and I went back to the groceries for more food!

 **Panther** : Tell me Fox, what does it feel like to have a full fridge?

 **Fox** : Well, it’s certainly been a long time since the refrigerator has been completely full.  
**Fox** : Madarame never left me with food and would expect me to get my own food, even without money.  
**Fox** : Living on an empty stomach for days on end was normal.  
**Fox** : I am eternally grateful for what you’ve done for me, Noir.

 **Joker** : …  
**Joker** : And you’re going to continue being grateful because we’re all here to make sure you have a full stomach.

 **Skull** : Yer damn straight!

 **Panther** : Definitely!

 **Queen** : Madarame’s lucky he’s already behind bars or his face would’ve met the business end of my fisticuffs.

 **Mona** : Wow, Queen.

 **Noir** : Hm, if your financial situation really is that dire, can I help again?  
**Noir** : How about a painting?  
**Noir** : There is a portion of the wall in the entranceway that needs filling, can it be with one of your paintings?

 **Fox** : My own?  
**Fox** : Certainly.

 **Noir** : Wonderful!

 **Oracle** : So Inari, how much are you willing to do it for?

 **Fox** : Hm, I’m not certain. How much are you offering?

 **Noir** : Is 30,000 yen enough?

 **Skull** : 30,000?!

 **Panther** : 30,000????!!!!!!

 **Fox** : 30,000??????????????

 **Noir** : Oh of course, that’s too little!

 **Joker** : NOIR PLEASE I DON’T THINK OUR STICK BOY CAN HANDLE THESE PRICES

 **Noir** : Hm, then 30,000 yen it is!

 **Fox** : I will do my utmost to create the best painting ever.  
**Fox** : Queen, may I ask you to act as a model for me?

 **Queen** : Huh?

 **Fox** : It’s a logical conclusion to make a painting for Noir her girlfriend.

 **Noir** : …

 **Queen** : I’m not sure…

 **Noir** : Please?

 **Joker** : Noir! Noir, do the trick!

 

 

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**ultra fluffy** : prettyplease.gif

 **fists on wheels** : OH MY GOD

 **super fluffy** : YES HARU  
**super fluffy** : PUPPY EYES

 **Sets** : Wh?

 

 

**Phantom Thieves**

**Queen** : OKAY!

 **Noir** : Yay!  
**Noir** : Fox, I’ll up the price to 300,000 and it'll be for my private quarters instead! You can take your time; don’t rush, alright?

 **Fox** : 300,000…..

 **Panther** : Noir is out here, killing us again.

 **Joker** : I’d ask her to do it again.

 **Skull** : Same.

 

 

**October 1, 2016 (Early Morning)**

**Kurusu Akira — > Mishima Yuuki**

**Kurusu Akira** : I’ve got some requests done  
**Kurusu Akira** : I think that should be all for the ones I need to do  
**Kurusu Akira** : Yuuki?  
**Kurusu Akira** : Hey, Yuuki?

 **Mishima Yuuki** : Oh sorry, Kurusu, I was just busy with some things.

 **Kurusu Akira** : That’s cool, that’s cool.

 **Mishima Yuuki** : Thanks for telling me, I’ll make sure to keep an eye out for any new posts on the Phan site.

 **Kurusu Akira** : Alrighty then.  
**Kurusu Akira** : Good night, Yuuki.

 **Mishima Yuuki** : Good night, Kurusu!

Yuuki sends the final message off before turning off his phone. He places it face down on the desk before turning and opening his laptop. The Phantom Aficionado website is already open on his browser.

It’s quiet; his parents already in bed and he’s alone, awake late into the evening. It’s not uncommon for him to stay up late managing the Phantom Thieves’ official website, what with the amount of traffic from the people pouring to get a glimpse of the newest fad of the city.

The only sounds in the room is the rapid tapping of his keys. The lights are off, only the meek light of his desk lamp giving him company. Yuuki hums. The newest posts slowly trickle in,  the more vocal members of the forum more active during the wee hours of the night. He deletes a bunch, calling for death instead of changes of heart (and didn’t that send a chill down Yuuki’s spine) but the rest are checked off and ignored until someone makes a ruckus.

All in a day’s work, thinks Yuuki blearily. He rubs his eyes, but continues his work.

Off to the side, his phone beeps, once, twice, before stopping.

Yuuki’s fingers stop. He stares at his phone and listens to it beep once, twice again. Slowly, he reaches over, picks it up, and turns it over.

 

**(Unknown Number) — > Mishima Yuuki**

**(Unknown Number)** : Hello again, Mishima-kun.  
**(Unknown Number)** : Good evening.

 

Yuuki gulps. It’s that person again.

 

 **(Unknown Number)** : I don’t mean any harm. Please don’t misunderstand.  
**(Unknown Number)** : Instead of asking you right away what I want, I want us to play a game.

 

Eyebrow raising, Yuuki readjusts his grip on his phone. A game? He doesn’t try to reply. Whoever’s on the other side won’t let him. Instead, he just watches and waits.

 

 **(Unknown Number)** : If you want to find out who I am, trace this phone number.  
**(Unknown Number)** : We’ll begin from there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How have I never let Akira and Ryuji have a chat together. How.


	24. you're a persona user if you're existential

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As we progress further into the palace, there's things happening on the other end. While the kids roast each other, the Shadow ops realize what's happening in the background is bigger than they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy one year anniversary!!! Thank you for everyone who's dropped kudos, bookmarked, and just stopped by to read! I honestly never thought this dumb little fic would grow to become something so big! Enjoy!
> 
> (Oh yeah someone please tell me if there's errors I've had this chapter ready for a goddamn month and have only gotten around to posting it now because I hit writer's block super hard and have gotten into Mob Psycho 100 and because of my one track mind I'm now hyper fixated on it but I made sure to overcome everything to put this up on the anniversary okay okay rant over―)

**October 1, 2016 (Morning)**

“So that’s what they’re doing.” Goro bows his head. He can’t look Mitsuru in the eye, nor can he look around the room to the rest of the Shadow Operatives, too afraid to see their reactions.

The rapidly freezing desk is proof enough of what Mitsuru thinks.

By the door, Minato massages his temple, his eye hiding behind his hair. Souji, sitting in one of the chairs propped against the wall, has his head in his hands, his glasses hanging precariously from his fingers. Naoto and Akihiko are silent, as Chie stands fuming. 

“Yes.” And Mitsuru pushes herself on her feet and stalks away from the desk. Goro looks up. Her entire figure is tense and a good half of the desk is frozen, reaching outwards from where her fingers were.

“We have to do something!” Chie bursts out, hands balled into fists. “Now that we know what they’re doing we can—”

“It’s not going to be that simple, Chie-senpai,” Naoto sighs. She shakes her head before turning her eyes to Goro. Deep blue meet wine red. “You kept this a secret.”

“I had to—”

“Why?” The Detective Prince’s voice leaves no room for excuses and Goro knows that. He’s been making too many excuses as of late. He needs to, he doesn’t know if Father is watching, if the bug on his phones was removed, if he’s listening into the conversation right now—

“Goro.” Souji suddenly stands in front of him and lays his hand on his shoulder. His throat loosens in a gasp. He didn’t even realize he was getting short of breath. Souji looks at Naoto with a frown.

“I don’t think he’s in any condition to talk about it,” he says. “Shido’s clearly had a strong influence on him if he can’t say anything.”

“He might be listening,” Goro blurts out, shaking his head. “He trusts me more than he did years ago, but I can’t risk it, he’s punished me for less, and I don’t want them to hurt—” He flinches. No, saying his name was too risky. They knew enough, but they didn’t know everything.

The rest of the Shadow Operatives trade glances. He knew something, but he didn’t want to tell them.

...Or was it that he couldn’t tell them?

“Continue gathering information,” orders Mitsuru as she turns to face him. “Are you certain this AA of yours is a reliable source?” She gestures to the pile of paper on her desk, the ones he had delivered to her a few days ago. Goro doesn’t even have to look to know the AA stamped on the last page of each report.

He nods. “I would trust her with my life.”

  
  


**October 1, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**→  Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**yeet** : sneeze on me once and ur dead sakamoto

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ill keep that in mind

**mints** : have fun in your palace escapades

**super fluffy** : Have fun with your adult stuff

**mints** : thanks  
**mints** : i’m gonna need it

 

“Holy shit.” With face plastered right onto the window, wide brown eyes take in the vast expanse of space beyond the space station. It’s all black outside, dotted with stars and the occasional box of cargo meandering from one part of the station to the other. Skull pulls his face off the glass and turns to Joker. “Holy shit,” he repeats, eyes glittering.

Joker nods. “Holy shit.”

Noir giggles from behind her hand as Queen surveys the room they’re in. As usual, Fox watches the world through the window made from his fingers and Oracle brings up her console again. Mona and Panther only watch Skull with wide smiles.

“This should be the last area,” Oracle reports, absentmindedly scratching her cheek. “After we’re done with this part, it should just be the treasure room.”

Fox steps up to the window and looks over Skull’s head. “You said this was an airlock area, right? Does that mean our means of transportation are these doors?” The aforementioned door was circular with bright blue lights ringing its edges. An alpha symbol sat in the middle, but the other side of the door was the empty vastness of space. Fox blinks. “Is that even safe?”

“I’m hoping so,” replies Queen as she walks up to the door itself. There’s a button next to it, blinking blue. “While this isn’t actual space, there is a possibility that there is a vacuum out space outside instead of something that looks like space.”

“We might be entertaining the possibility of death,” confirms Mona. He looks at Oracle. “You have any way of figuring out if we could breathe out there?”

“Gimme a few—”

“Well, we could just test it out,” Joker says and before anyone can think twice of stopping him, he slams his fist onto the blue button. The airlock opens with a loud whirr and Queen, still standing in front of the door, barely has the time to react and step away.

“JOKER—” the rest of her sentence is sucked out just as she is and her words devolve into screaming and promising someone a swift death. Joker only flashes the rest of them, shell-shocked, an innocent smile before jumping out of the airlock.

A beat.

“Motherfucker—” Skull blurts and Panther immediately starts laughing.

“Oh my god, Joker—!”

“Our leader’s fucking dead.” Oracle, deadpan, comments. Fox and Noir nod silently.

“I’ll make sure Joker is buried with the finest of his coffee beans.”

“Fox, I think your priorities are a tad bit skewed...”

Mona hops to the airlock, it having closed once more, and peers out to try to get a good look of the other side. He catches a glimpse of Joker before he’s brought down by a vicious fist.

“Let’s… go after them.”

 

**Akechi Goro → Suzui Shiho**

**Akechi Goro** : i think   
**Akechi Goro** : i made a huge mistake

**Suzui Shiho** : i’m going to call. you better pick up. 

 

“Uh, did you have to punch him hard enough to knock him out?” Panther asks, staring down at their leader sprawled on the ground spread eagled.

Queen scoffs. “He’s just over exaggerating. He’ll be up in no time.” She claps her hands together. “In the meantime, let’s get going. Oracle, I trust you can guide us the rest of the way?”

“O-of course, Queen—ppfft—“

“Alright then. Skull, carry your boyfriend. When he wakes up, hopefully he’ll get it in his thick skull not to mess with me like that.”

“‘In his thick skull’—”

“ORACLE.”

"We all know he's just to do it again," Panther reckons as Skull crouches to pick up his limp noodle of a boyfriend.

Noir raises her hand. "Actually, I would like to try something..."

 

**October 1, 2016 (Evening)**

**→ Enter Here for Gays and Thieving ←**

**super fluffy** : I have learned my lesson  
 **super fluffy** : Queen’s dominance has been asserted

**fists on wheels** : As it should be, leader.

**strawberry shortcake** : We all know he’s just gonna do it again

**fists on wheels** : Let me instill fear in him before it happens.

**super fluffy** : Oho don’t worry your dominance has been asserted very thoroughly   
**super fluffy** : I’m scared to cross paths

**yeet** : is it bc we left u outside of the airlock

**super fluffy** : No it’s because yoYES IT’S BECAUSE YOU LEFT ME OUTSIDE OF THE AIRLOCK

**graphic design is my passion** : We were able to discern the breathability of the air outside the airlock. You should have been perfectly fine.

**super fluffy** : Well yes but do you think I’d know that immediately????  
 **super fluffy** : I was about to pray to the gods to save me from mortal peril before I noticed Futaba laughing at me  
 **super fluffy** : You devious little gremlin

**yeet** : actually it was harus idea

**super fluffy** : …  
**super fluffy** : Fuck

**ultra fluffy** : you aren’t harmed in the end and we made sure we wouldn’t accidentally kill you, so everything work out in the end.  
 **ultra fluffy** : mako-chan instilled the fear of god in akira-kun and akira-kun was scared out of his wits.  
 **ultra fluffy** : win-win!

**super fluffy** : IT WAS NOT A WIN-WIN

**yeet** : u sure  
**yeet** : ur the one whos always going on about joining the stars in their observation of the human populace

**super fluffy** : I was being nihilistic

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : let me be on record to say that i was against this whole idea

**strawberry shortcake** :  👀

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : stop eyes emojiing me takamaki

**strawberry shortcake** : Then stop lying through your teeth, Sakamoto

**super fluffy** : (;*△*;)  
**super fluffy** : Ryu how could you

**strawberry shortcake** : Ha ha!

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i can explain

**super fluffy** : Do i have to ban you from sweet coffee

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : im banned anyway bc i was sick  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : i dont need it like u do

**super fluffy** : Damn  
**super fluffy** : A kissing ban then

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : ud break that one urself

**super fluffy** : No I wouldn’t

**yeet** : doubt.png

**strawberry shortcake** : surejan.png

**graphic design is my passion** : yousure.png

**ultra fluffy** : ithinknot.png

**fists on wheels** : This entire chat’s been tainted by memes.

**super fluffy** : Embrace it Makoto

**fists on wheels** : If you insist.  
**fists on wheels** : youreweak.png

**super fluffy** : I  
 **super fluffy** : Not against me  
 **super fluffy** : Why are all my thieves ganging up on me  
 **super fluffy** : Is this a coup

**mishimoon** : dealwithit.gif

**super fluffy** : When did you get here Yuuki

**mishimoon** : Been here the entire time.  
**mishimoon** : Watching you talk and stuff.

**yeet** : lurking?  
**yeet** : totally understand

**mishimoon** : *finger guns*

**yeet** : *finger guns*

**super fluffy** : Y’all please

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : u cant say touch ban either  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : u cant keep ur hands off me

**super fluffy** : Damn I always thought of that as a strength now it’s a weakness

**strawberry shortcake** : Gay

**super fluffy** : Says a gay girl herself

**strawberry shortcake** : It’s not like I’m denying it

**super fluffy** : Ryuji you’re doing a really good job evading punishment how dare you

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : how bout we just  
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : move on? (・・；)

**super fluffy** : …  
**super fluffy** : You’re lucky you’re cute

**strawberry shortcake** : Evaded a bullet there, Sakamoto

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : shush takamaki

 

**October 2, 2016 (Morning)**

**Shadow Operatives +**

**Kirijo** : Change of plans.  
 **Kirijo** : Emergency meeting on the 8th. Attendance is mandatory, unless you are unable to reschedule activities.  
 **Kirijo** : Amagi, if you could bring Suzui with you, her presence in the meeting is prefered.

**Amagi** : Of course.

**Kirijo** : Goro will be present as well.

 

**October 2, 2016 (Afternoon)**

**— > Enter Here for Gays and Thieving <—**

**super fluffy** : You know I just realized something

**strawberry shortcake** : What’s up?

**super fluffy** : We need to get Haru a Jack Frost onesie

**strawberry shortcake** : OMG you’re right!!!

**ultra fluffy** : a onesie?

**strawberry shortcake** : Yeah we all have one!

**super fluffy** : We have to bring you to the Jack Frost store  
**super fluffy** : Guaranteed you’ll spend all of your money there

**ultra fluffy** : that might not be so likely for me, but i’d love to see this jack frost store!  
**ultra fluffy** : there really is a store dedicated to a persona.

**fists on wheels** : We were surprised too, but they have quite the robust amount of merchandise.

**graphic design is my passion** : Much of my bathroom necessities are thanks to the selection present in the store.

**super fluffy** : That and fifty billion Jack Frost figurines

**graphic design is my passion** : They are for modeling. Because Joker no longer has Jack Frost in his possession, I cannot record the various expressions the Persona makes.  
**graphic design is my passion** : Sometimes it is frustrating, especially when I find free time on my hands, but it’s not the end of the world.

**mints** : i have a jack frost

**super fluffy** : You do?

**graphic design is my passion** : You do?

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : wait hold up u have multiple personas?

**mints** : yes  
 **mints** : did no one tell you  
 **mints** : sakura

**yeet** : ive been exposed

**super fluffy** ; You knew?!

**yeet** : duh  
 **yeet** : im a navigator  
 **yeet** : minato-san and souji-san radiate power  
 **yeet** : theyre clearly wild cards like u  
 **yeet** : and minato-san summoned a jack frost when we chased you down in hawaii  
 **yeet** : in the real world no less

**fists on wheels** : Really?

**strawberry shortcake** : Wait that doesn’t make sense  
**strawberry shortcake** : You can’t summon Personas in the real world

**mints** : yes you can

**Morganya** : no you can’t.  
**Morganya** : unless you have some tech that helps you.

**mints** : we do  
**mints** : you know those guns we were carrying around during akira’s birthday party

**graphic design is my passion** : Those had the ability to summon Personas?

**mints** : not quite  
 **mints** : because the real world is entirely different from the metaverse, summoning a persona requires a lot more force  
 **mints** : your mind has to go through pretty heavy stress to summon personas

**fists on wheels** : What kind of stress are we talking about?

**mints** : trauma

**ultra fluffy** : ...trauma?

**mishimoon** : Trauma?!

**yeet** : the lurker returns

**mints** : yep  
 **mints** : i’m sure you can tell not all of us have it exactly right in the head  
 **mints** : so what’s the sensible explanation to summoning a persona in the real world?  
 **mints** : shooting a gun at yourself

**mishimoon** : WHAT???!!!

**mints** : there are no bullets in the guns, which are called evokers with a capital e  
**mints** : they’re just made to copy the feeling of killing yourself to put your mind under stress

**fists on wheels** : I have to admit, that does sound like a plausible way to evoke that kind of feeling.

**graphic design is my passion** : It seems unnecessarily violent, but logical.

**super fluffy** : Makes sense

**strawberry shortcake** : There’s absolutely no bullets?

**mints** : none at all  
 **mints** : there’s more of a crazy light show when you summon  
 **mints** : looks super cool

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : the method sounds super fucked up but imaginin is summonin our personas in the real world sounds like the radest shit ever!!!

**ultra fluffy** : how much does one evoker cost? how can we get them?

**yeet** : can u get us some chief

**mints** : no for multiple reasons  
 **mints** : 1) you’re all children  
 **mints** : 2) mitsuru-senpai would have my head  
 **mints** : 3) shadow ops only

**yeet** : bummer

**ultra fluffy** : understandable.

**Morganya** : what about me?  
**Morganya** : though i loathe to say it, i’m a cat.

**mints** : one of the sees members was a dog so we outfitted his collar to have something that mimicked evokers  
**mints** : don’t ask me what, i don’t know the schematics

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : a dog?!

**yeet** : pupper

**mints** : yeah  
**mints** : he’s not around anymore but one of his pups stays with one of our operatives

**super fluffy** : Koromaru jr?

**mints** : yep

**mishimoon** : ...Should I be surprised that none of you are fazed?   
**mishimoon** : ...Even if you’re talking about death.

**fists on wheels** : The stability of our mental states does come into question every now and again, but it’s not a new topic to us.

**graphic design is my passion** : Our modus operandi involves us traversing through environments conjured by the human unconscious. It would be wrong for us not to dwell on the state of each of our minds often.

**super fluffy** : Long story short it’s normal for us to go through existential crisies

**strawberry shortcake** : Yep

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : if u saw the pt chat whooooo boy

**mints** : this is what happens when you get a persona   
**mints** : you get existential

**mishimoon** : Now I’m a little glad I’m not involved in infiltrating Palaces…

**super fluffy** : Wait shouldn’t we get Yuuki a Jack Frost onesie?

**mishimoon** : And you bounce back?!

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : oh shit ur right!   
**CATCH THESE HANDS** : hey u free anytime soon?

**mishimoon** : Um, not really.   
**mishimoon** : Something came up recently, so I’m a little busy.

**yeet** : whats so important?

**mishimoon** : Confidential.

**super fluffy** : ...Well, now we’re gonna have to find out

**mishimoon** : Kurusu.

**super fluffy** : Hmmm…   
**super fluffy** : Okay Futaba keep your nose off his phone

**yeet** : i havent seen him since hawaii  
 **yeet** : even then i didnt touch his devices  
 **yeet** : his stuffs pretty damn secure  
 **yeet** : ur pretty smart arent u npc

**mishimoon** : I guess???    
**mishimoon** : I’ve been studying up on coding since taking up the phansite.

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : then tell us when ur free! every phantom thief needs a jack frost onesie

**super fluffy** : Then we’ll schedule a slumber party after we’re done with Okumura’s Palace

**strawberry shortcake** : Real thought, what if we celebrated Haru joining us that way?

**yeet** : slumber party celebration?  
**yeet** : hell yes

**graphic design is my passion** : We shouldn’t be thinking so soon. None of us know what will happen to us in the future. We shouldn’t deny the possibility of something going wrong in the Palace.

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : party pooper

**mints** : it’s always good to have a pragmatic outlook

**strawberry shortcake** : But if we do end up taking Okumura’s heart, do you want to celebrate in a sleepover?

**Morganya** : it’s super low key, not like our other celebrations in a buffet or at the beach.  
**Morganya** : we do it a lot too.

**strawberry shortcake** : But this one’s to welcome Haru!  
 **strawberry shortcake** : And we could throw an actual party, not like us just sitting around and talking  
 **strawberry shortcake** : And we could do one of our team building activities!

**super fluffy** : True

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : we havent done one of those in a long time

**ultra fluffy** : team building activities?

**super fluffy** : Just us fooling around and getting to know each other  
 **super fluffy** : Last time we did one of these things was in August  
 **super fluffy** : We made a leaning tower of Dr. Salt and Arginade cans

**yeet** : i made that worm

**super fluffy** : Okay Futaba made a leaning tower of Dr. Salt and Arginade cans

**ultra fluffy** : that sounds like fun!  
**ultra fluffy** : a celebration like that would be perfect.

**Morganya** : even if it’s not exactly the fanciest? everyone does the weirdest stuff during these things

**ultra fluffy** : but that’s just how you all are, right? i never had many friends to spend time with, given who i was, but a small celebration like a slumber party sounds the perfect chance to get to know everyone even more!

**super fluffy** : Well well well, the lady has spoken

**super fluffy** : Celebration slumber party with team bonding shenanigans is a go

**fists on wheels** : If everything goes to plan.

**super fluffy** : Right

**CATCH THESE HANDS** : that just means we gotta make sure we take okumuras heart yeah?  
 **CATCH THESE HANDS** : give haru a sleepover she’ll never forget!!!

**Morganya** : get ready, haru.  
**Morganya** : there’s more slumber parties where that came from.

**ultra fluffy** : hehe, i look forward to it!

 

**October 2, 2016 (Late Evening)**

Aigis has been part of the Shadow Operatives since formation. Of course she had been, ever since the threats made by Shadows increased as the second group of Persona users, the Investigation Team, made themselves known. She had been on the side of Mitsuru-san, watching as Minato-san watched the team in Inaba grow and thrive.

She was very familiar with a lot of things. Inaba itself had become a kind of safe haven. After the debacle of the P-1 Grand Prix and Climax, the Investigation Team members, enlisted as new and reserve members of the Shadow Operatives, decided to establish their base of operations there, similar to how there was a base of operations in Iwatodai. It wasn’t uncommon to visit Inaba frequently, whether it be alone or with Mitsuru-san.

She remembers, years ago, a boy who used to watch them whenever they came into the small town.

“Mitsuru-san…” She remembers how much Mitsuru-san was taken by the boy, intrigued by his boldness and curiosity. “Are you still thinking of what Goro-san showed us?”

Mitsuru-san remain silent. The laboratory housed in the Shadow Operatives headquarters was busy as usual. In fact, it might have been even busier. Ever since they showed the head scientist the papers Goro had given them, he had lost it, having darted back to the laboratory to take it all in.

That had been yesterday morning. Today, they all were ruffled birds, darting in and out of the laboratory itself and into the offices, frazzled.

“That’s where they had gone.” Aigis lifts her head and watches Mitsuru-san from the corner of her eye. “I hadn’t thought the people who deserted the group years ago would turn to such a… slime of a man.” At the last part of her sentence, Mitsuru-san’s expression twists into something dripping in malice, eyebrows scrunched, and mouth drawn in a snarl. Aigis’s eyes dart forward.

“They wanted to follow someone who held the same goals as they did,” she replies. “There was a reason they deserted, after all.”

“But, for them to be under our noses all this time…” Mitsuru-san lifts her head to look up at the ceiling, at the large circular light that beamed down on all the occupants of the large laboratory. “If only Goro had told us sooner, he wouldn’t have had to suffer for so long.”

The image of the little boy with brown hair flashes in her mind again. “The risk would not have been worth it. There must be a reason why Goro-san had withheld the information.”

“You believe so as well?”

“Affirmative.” Mitsuru-san lowers her head.

“He is still afraid of his father’s punishment,” she says,  “If he was to reveal everything without risk, that means Shido does not have influence on him. But because he’s still afraid of Shido, then there is still something holding him back.”

“Yes.”

Silence sits between them, as much silence there could be at the scientists bustling below them. Suddenly, one of the scientists yells something before hastily gathering their papers and darting towards the two looking over them all. They rush up the stairs and barely has the time to stop before Mitsuru-san, huffing and gasping deeply.

“Mitsuru-san, I figured out what research is missing,” they say and Mitsuru-san’s eyes narrow.

“Show me.”

 

**October 3, 2016 (Early Morning)**

**Suzui Shiho — > Takamaki Ann**

**Suzui Shiho** : hey ann!

**Takamaki Ann** : There you are, sweet bun!!!

**Suzui Shiho** : haha, sorry i haven’t been on the chat often.  
**Suzui Shiho** : work caught up to me, so i’ve been having a busy couple of days.

**Takamaki Ann** : School’s being a bitch again?

**Suzui Shiho** : you can say that again.  
**Suzui Shiho** : anyway, i’ve got some news~...

**Takamaki Ann** : Is that why you’re texting me at  
**Takamaki Ann** : 2 in the morning?

**Suzui Shiho** : yep.  
**Suzui Shiho** : i’ll be in tokyo on saturday!

**Takamaki Ann** : !!!!!!!!!!  
**Takamaki Ann** : For real?!!?!?!??!!

**Suzui Shiho** : for real!

**Takamaki Ann** : AAAAAAAAAAA  
 **Takamaki Ann** : (´▽`ʃƪ)♡ SHIHOOOOOOOOOO  
 **Takamaki Ann** : How could you tell me so abruptly?!?!!?  
 **Takamaki Ann** : Now I’ve gotta tell the others!!

**Suzui Shiho** : you don’t have to, i’ll pop in the chat later today and tell them myself!

**Takamaki Ann** : Later todaSHIHO WHAT ARE YOU DOING AWAKE

**Suzui Shiho** : ?

**Takamaki Ann** : ARE YOU TRYING TO INVITE THE PRESENCE OF SCARY SHIHO  
**Takamaki Ann** : YOU’RE GONNA END UP SCARING EVERYONE MORE THAN INFORMING THEM

**Suzui Shiho** : silly ann, i’ll tell them once i’ve got my daily coffee intake and the adequate amount of sleep!  
**Suzui Shiho** : after all, i don’t think before coffee shiho is the best first impression for haru-san.

**Takamaki Ann** : You could just call her Haru, she lets everyone else call her that

**Suzui Shiho** : not until i greet her directly.

**Takamaki Ann** : Suit yourself   
**Takamaki Ann** : So what’re you coming to Tokyo for?

**Suzui Shiho** : shadow operative stuff. confidential.

**Takamaki Ann** : You too?   
**Takamaki Ann** : Can you tell me??

**Suzui Shiho** : i would love to, but this is kind of… top secret. mitsuru-san’s direct orders.   
**Suzui Shiho** : ann, i’ve known you since middle school, you can’t ask futaba-chan for mitsuru-san’s contact information, she already knows you’re phantom thieves and she won’t tell you a thing.

**Takamaki Ann** : This is super sus

**Suzui Shiho** : i know, i know. just trust me, alright?   
**Suzui Shiho** : i promise it’s nothing bad.

**Takamaki Ann** : I’m holding you to that, Shiho!

**Suzui Shiho** : i expect nothing less.   
  
  


**Suzui Shiho → Akechi Goro**

**Suzui Shiho** : do you know any way to stave off guilt from a blatant lie?

**Akechi Goro** : You can’t.   


**Suzui Shiho** : i figured as much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Real talk, Shiho and Goro being friends is 100% an accident but I know where I'm going with this trust me.

**Author's Note:**

> There's more of course.
> 
> Wanna talk about P3, P4, or P5? Contact me at tumblr @smellie-cactus


End file.
